Crash Champions
Season 2 - Episode 6 - Part 7
The Third Great Robot Heist


Scene: Sarveti's ship, bridge 

"Welcome back," Verino Sarveti said to Celestia van Rijndael as she entered the bridge of his ship. His two other employees Jared -- or, "Ninja Red" -- and Thudnar were there. Jared wore his red ninja suit but had taken off his mask to eat a take-out shawarma which he had nearly finished. Half of Sarveti's meal sat on the console, still wrapped neatly in its package. Thudnar had finished his meal already. They assumed that Celestia would have made her own arrangements.

"I'll get us out of here." Sarveti returned his attention to the console and activated a few controls. The view of the dispatch center's parking lot disappeared and was replaced by stars.

"So how'd it go?" asked Ninja Red.

Celestia gave a quick summary. "Their tests are difficult, which is proper given the level of trust they expect of you. They also sent me on a mission."

"What was it?" Ninja Red was curious.

Celestia spared them the gossip and kept details to a minimum. "There was an emergency in town. The task required three healers, but we saved a man's life."

"Did you get paid?" Sarveti asked.

"No," Celestia replied.

"So are you done?" asked Thudnar.

"If only I were." Celestia feigned exasperation. "I will require at least several more days of study. The others spoke of weeks."

Sarveti did not want to hear about Celestia being gone for weeks. "If you're going back there, you can hire a taxi." It was unspoken but understood that he would not be paying for it. "And I need to know what days they want you and if your schedule can be changed. I can just send Jared and Thudnar out on the next job, but this one might require a little bit of diplomacy and that's something you're good at."

"I'm good at diplomacy," Ninja Red said in defense of his reputation.

"So what are the details of this new task?" Celestia asked.

"It's bigger than the last one," Sarveti said. "And so are the robots that my client wants."


Scene: Robot Hall

Inside a large hall, a number of humanoid robots sat in giant folding lawn chairs or on the floor. Their size was given away by the drums of oil in their hands, which they sipped through straws. The robots all looked in one direction toward one end of the hall where there was a raised platform and a metal throne, a simple blocky construct with no decoration other than its chrome plating, and the light charcoal-colored robot who sat upon it.

The robots raised their fists and drinks in a sign of respect as they shouted in unison. "All hail Slackertron! Leader of the Relaxocons!"

Slackertron pulled a lever on the side of the throne to raise the footrest and tilt the back of the chair to a 45-degree angle. He exhaled with pleasure as he streched his arms out and leaned back. He rested his head on his hands, then addressed the audience. "We are here for our monthly meeting to discuss any ideas anyone might have to better optimize our energy efficiency. So, let's make it quick. Anyone?"

One of the robots stood up to give a suggestion. "Oh! Oh! I have an idea!"

Slackertron silently raised a hand toward the other robot, gesturing for him to continue.

The other robot continued. "Here's a thought. If we just do a little bit of work--"

"Aww!" the crowd jeered the suggestion before robot had finished. Their groans echoed throughout the hallway.

"No, no. Hear him out." Slackertron calmly told the crowd to quiet down, and they did. After all, jeering cost them energy.

The other robot summarized his idea. "We can build power plants for the humans. We'll let the humans run them and maintain them while we take some of the power for ourselves. In the end we will have more energy and can spend more time relaxing."

Slackertron shrugged. "Try it and see if it works."


Scene: War Planning Office

Several military officers had gathered at the Pentagon to discuss the current situation. An old general glumly gave a summary. "The alien robots now control thirty percent of the economy, and growing, due to their monopoly in the energy sector."

A middle-aged woman with a colonel's birds on her shoulders spoke next. "They are a bad influence on the people, who are getting lazy and refusing to work because they want to act like the robots, who are successful. This ruins any hope of overcoming their economic power."

A younger captain expressed their growing hopelessness. "Their technology is way too advanced to even consider fighting them. We may just have to live with them."

The old general was silent for a short time before asking the question that none of them had an answer for. "What are we going to do?"


Scene: Roadside

The cars on the highway slowed down as their drivers took pictures of the large alien robot that was catching sunlight on a farm beside the road. They also took pictures of the three humans standing beside it and the dimension ship that had landed them at the farm.

Ninja Red looked over the big metal guy. "So, this is one of the robots we are supposed to steal."

"It too big," Thudnar said, with his battleaxe leaning against his shoulder. To his side, Celestia was dressed casually that day for what promised to be a complicated but nonviolent job. She had even left her sword on the ship, but she still carried a photonic pistol just in case she might need a weapon.

"Riiight," Ninja Red agreed with the barbarian. "We're not getting him onto the ship. We'll need to pop them out individually. It's doable, but where are we going to put them down? And it'll be a lot of work."

The robot spoke. "Don't do any work. Just relax."

Celestia raised a question. "For what purpose does Sarveti want these robots?"

"To do work," Ninja Red answered with little certainty.

The robot casually objected. "Naaaah."

Ninja Red continued. "I mean, I expect that the client wants them to do work. I think he's going to have them working in mines, doing mining or something."

"That's not gonna happen," said the robot.

Ninja Red considered the situation. "First we're going to have to make them want to do work." The client would not be happy if they delivered non-functional robots.

"At least they are not trying to kill us this time," Celestia said.

"This just as bad," Thudnar said.

Celestia politely disagreed. "I would say that the more murderous robots were worse."

Ninja Red clarified the meaning of Thudnar's words. "I think what he means is it's bad for business, and the problem is similar. Someone messed with their programming and the robots aren't doing what they're supposed to."

Celestia smiled. "I know someone who might be able to help with that."

It took them a day to make the arrangements. As they had forgotten to lock onto the exit time, a day had passed in this dimension as well. That was fine. The robot had not moved. It was still lying there as Sarveti's ship returned to land at the field. The robot muttered as the ship's shadow passed over it. "Solar insolation is sub-optimal... ... that's better."

Walking away from the ship, Ninja Red carried a tablet computer in one hand and loops of cabling in the other. He a chat with his new crewmate as the team of four departed. "Just be glad the boss is not here, because I really don't think he'd like seeing you do whatever you did to the controls. What did you do, anyways?"

"I was just checking it out!" Jill said innocently. "It's a new type of ship. I was seeing how it works." Jill had left her heavy alien gun behind at Mick's base, and she happily moved loosely and freely without it. She looked forward and saw a huge task ahead of her. "Is that the robot?"

"Mmm-hm," Ninja Red nodded.

"Um, what am I... supposed to do?" She looked first at Ninja Red and then at Celestia.

Celestia was unsure of what Jill needed to do, but she knew what the end result should be. "If you can, make him want to get up and do work."

"Alright..." Jill began jogging forward to see what she could do.

Ninja Red hustled after her. "Wait, wait. Let me get set up so that I can see what you're doing."

Jill put her hand on the robot's forearm which was one long rectangle of metal. Her nanites puddled around her hand, but could not find an entrance through the robot's hull. "It's not letting me in."

Ninja Red walked around the robot's body. "Where would it have a port that I can connect to?"

Jill leaped up onto the robot's body, leaving a muddy impression in the dirt behind her as she rose a few yards into the air from a standing position.

"Whoa," said an impressed barbarian.

Ninja Red made a mental note of Jill's power. "Okay, she can do that."

Jill stepped around the robot's torso. She looked back and saw that her shoes had tracked mud onto the robot. "I'm sorry, I got some mud on you."

"Whatever," said the unconcerned robot.

Ninja Red talked to himself as he continued looking for an entry point. "If you were going to do maintenance on a robot while it was standing, the port would be..." He saw a small panel right where he expected it to be. "In the foot!" He ran for it and set his equipment down, then turned back to shout to his partner. "Hey, Thudnar! Get me the toolbox!" The barbarian nodded, planted his axe in the ground, and turned to run back to the ship.

Jill reported from the top of the robot. "It looks like there's glass in his chest. I mean, it looks like a window or something."

Ninja Red began to use the point of a ninja star to attempt to pry the open the panel in the side of the robot's foot. He stopped as soon as he had started when a different idea came to him. He pushed the panel with his finger. It depressed and slid open. "Hey, I think I found a communications port!" He turned on the tablet computer which showed a holographic display in the air above itself, then began to look at the other equipment he had set down beside it.

Jill ran down the robot's leg and jumped off. Her shoes stuck in the mud. It took her some effort to get unstuck. "Now my shoes have more mud on them," she complained to herself as she wiped her shoes on the grass.

Thudnar put the toolbox down beside Ninja Red and stood by to watch him work. Celestia was also curious to see what he would do.

Ninja Red plugged the thin end of a cable into a small box, and flipped a switch on the box's side to turn it on. The tablet-style holodisplay automatically found the device wirelessly, connected to it, and displayed a spectrum analyzer.

Ninja Red held up the thick plastic plug at the other end of the wire. The inside of the plug had a flexible metal lining made of multiple rectangular segments, which themselves had tiny slots in which the ends of wires were retracted, and tiny holes that held internal sensors. A light on the side of the plug flashed yellow as Ninja Red waved it around the connector. The square plug remolded itself into the round shape of the robot's connector, using a similar form of technology to the shape-changing docking rings on spaceships. When the plug was done reshaping itself, the light blinked a faster green. "It looks like we're ready to go", Ninja Red said. He connected the wire.

"That tickles," said the robot.

Ninja Red stepped back from the connection and presented the robot to Jill. "Alright, you do whatever it is that you do." He knelt by the tablet computer.

Jill also knelt by the tablet computer. She touched it and sent her nanites into it.

Ninja Red was a little perturbed to see a silver pool around Jill's hand, signals appear on the spectrum analyzer, and a packet capture tool open without any use of the computer's menus. "Oh-kay."

Jill sent a few more signals, then talked to the robot. "So, uh, robot. Do you want to get up and do something?"

"Naaaaah." The robot declined. 

Jill withdrew her nanites from the tablet, stood up, and walked to the access panel. She touched the connection and waited several seconds for her nanites to do their work. Then she smirked. "So, robot. How do you feel now?"

The robot groaned as it sat up and then stretched its arms. "I feel a little... bored." Jill turned and smiled happily at Ninja Red. His mask hid his face, but Celestia and Thudnar smiled back. The robot began to stand up.

Ninja Red scrolled through the packet capture. "I don't think we caught whatever it was you did." He was surprised to see the small box holding the spectrum analyzer equipment fly away as the robot walked away, with the box and cable attached to its foot. "Hey! That's my stuff!"

"I just wanna do something, you know?" the robot said as it walked away and onto the highway. Cars screeched to a halt, and there were a couple of fender-benders. The robot stepped towards the nearest car and looked down at it, frightening the passengers.

"Get out!" said the driver to her family.

On both lanes of the highway, everyone abandoned their cars and ran away screaming. The robot picked up a car and looked at it. "I can be you." The robot dropped the car and transformed its shape into a reasonable facsimile of the vehicle. The robot laughed as it rolled back and forth on the road, and then found itself in front of another car. "I can be you too!" The robot changed its shape to match. "And I can be... Bluuuue!" The robot changed its color. "Blue is nice."

The four thieves were now smiling nervously, finding the robot's behavior to be  erratic.

"Jill. What did you do to it?" Ninja Red asked.

"I just told it to want to get up and do something."

The robot transformed back into humanoid form and stood up. It grabbed a car and threw it across the center divider and into the field on the far side of the highway.

The four humans looked on in shock. This was unexpected.

The robot kicked another car into the field. As the car crumpled and rolled on impact, the robot raised its arms up and shouted "Gooooooal!"

"Uh, Jill..." Ninja Red started.

"Make him stop?" Jill asked.

"Yes, please," Celestia answered.

"Alright." Jill walked forward.

Someone else was watching. Further down the road were two robots, a shorter yellow robot with the shape of a small car and a larger blue robot whose body resembled a Mack truck.

"We oughta tell the other robots about this." asked the smaller robot.

"Yeah, we oughta," answered the larger robot.

Further down the road from those robots was a city where several robots had chosen to relax in the middle of the street, causing a massive traffic jam. Car horns honked as traffic on the main road was stopped due to an obstruction named Slackertron in the middle of a four-way intersection.

A truck driver pleaded with the robot. "Excuse me. Could you get out of the way? I have to make a delivery."

Slackertron calmly refused. "Can't it wait a little while? What are you delivering that is so important?"

"Uh..." The driver looked back at his truck, which was labeled "BEER".

Passersby stopped and perked up as they saw the stalled truck. "Beer?" "Beer?" "Beer?" "Beer!" They stepped forward in a mass, slowly walking toward the truck with their arms outstretched toward the carrier of glorious golden liquid. "Beeeeeer!"

The truck driver backed up against his vehicle as the mob approached. "No! No! Noooooo! Oh well, I'm insured." He shrugged as the mob opened the back of his truck and the people started helping themselves to his cargo.

The scene was witnessed by two robots on the highway leading out of the city.

"Do you think we oughta do something about that?" asked the smaller yellow robot.

"Maybe we oughta," responded the larger blue robot.

Further back on the highway, a runaway robot laughed as it smashed abandoned cars under its feet.

Jill sighed and turned around. "I'm sorry, I couldn't catch him. I did get your stuff back." She raised her hand and returned the cable and spectrum analyzer box to Ninja Red.

"Thank you. Ninja Red took the gear. "We'll have to find another robot. How about those two over there?" He pointed to the two robots that were about a mile away in the distance. "We'll head back to the ship and pop over there."

"Let's take a car," Jill suggested. "I'll drive." She began walking toward one that had not been crushed.

"Oh, yeah." Ninja Red had not thought of that.

Soon the stolen car slowed down to a halt by the two standing robots. The four adventurers stepped out. Ninja Red hustled to the smaller yellow robot. "It doesn't look like they're going anywhere. Let's get set up." He knelt by the robot and found the access panel on its foot.

The robot asked a question of the larger robot. "I think we oughta say hello to these people."

"Yeah, we oughta." Neither of them spoke further.

Celestia and Jill walked around the front of the robots to have a look at them. Unsure if she should try to speak to them, Jill smiled and waved. "Hello."

They waited a few more moments. The smaller robot said "hi" and nothing more.

Jill walked over to where Ninja Red was working. "Should we..." She knelt down. "... or should I work on the other one." She began to get up and move until Ninja Red objected.

"Don't do what you did because that didn't work. Why don't you just tell me what you did and I'll see if I can figure out how to do something similar that won't make the robot go nuts."

Jill was unsure of exactly what her nanites had done. "Well, there was this... instruction that said don't do anything, and I changed it so that it said do something."

That simple description was a big help to Ninja Red. "Can you find that instruction but don't change anything, just show me where it is."

"Okay..." She knelt down and put her nanites into the tablet. 

Meanwhile, Celestia and Thudnar looked beyond the line of stopped cars past the last exit to see the traffic jam caused by several resting robots. "What are they doing?" Celestia asked.

Thudnar attempted to answer. "They do nuh-- nuh--... no thing."

Celestia observed for a moment longer. "That appears to be the case." Seeing nothing that she could do about it, she turned back to Ninja Red. "Have we determined that the condition is within the robots' minds and not addressable through persuasion alone?"

"That's the theory," Ninja Red said. "Your friend thinks she found where it is."

"My name's Jill," Jill reminded him.

"Oh, yeah. That's right." Ninja Red reintroduced himself with a flourish. "I am Ninja Red!"

"His name is Jared," Celestia said. 

"Hi, Jared," Jill smiled at him.

"Uh, hi." Ninja Red looked back at her.

"Work," Thudnar reminded the two.

"Right," Ninja Red returned his attention to the tablet. He worked the holographic controls and made a copy of one of the windows. "I'm making a copy of the robot's instruction set. I'd like you to show me how you knock it out in the copy, not the real thing."

"All right." Jill let her nanites do the work.

Ninja Red was surprised by the results. "What's this... 23 gigabtye code injection?"

Jill was not sure. "It's what my nanites want to do."

Ninja Red rejected it. "Make them want to do something else that I can possibly read in a human lifetime. We should only be knocking out or flipping around a few instructions. It might be a simple jump command."

As Jill began to work again, everyone was interrupted by the chopping noise of a military helicopter flying overhead. The helicopter was heading towards the robot-induced traffic jam in in the city. It stopped in midair, then turned around and headed towards the four adventurers before landing on the highway ahead of them.

An officer with a captain's bars on his shoulders exited the helicopter before its blades were wound down. He was accompanied by a lesser-ranking soldier with a corporal's rank.

Thudnar turned to Celestia. "You talk."

"Very well." Celestia stepped forward and raised an open hand. "Hail!" she called out to the soldiers.

"Good day!" The captain waved back. When he was close enough to talk, he talked. "It looks like you're planning something here. We want to be read in on it."

Celestia gave a minimal description of her team's objective. "We were hoping to convince these robots to perform work for us."

The captain scoffed. "Hah. Good luck with that."

Celestia smiled. "It is difficult, but my companions might be able to find a way to change their internal logic."

The captain turned serious. "We defininely want to know if you succeed. We've had a lot of people look at it and no one was able to understand the programming."

There was a loud clank as the yellow robot happily threw his arms wide and accidentally smacked the robot next to him. "Oh, yeah! I definitely want to get up and start doing things!" Jill and Ninja Red scampered back as the robot paced around, stepping on the tablet and crushing a section of its holographic emitter. The robot paused for a moment as it recovered some old memories from its data banks. "Oh, I remember. I was a taxi cab." He looked down at Jill. "Do you want to go somewhere?"

"Umm... I dunno..."

The robot leaned down and grabbed Jill. "How about I send you on a trip?" Jill shrieked as the robot threw her over the heads of Celestia and the two soldiers, who stepped out of the way as they saw her coming. Jill's nanoshield flashed as her shoulder hit the pavement.

"Get that girl some medical attention!" shouted the captain. The corporal took  two steps before Jill raised herself up and waved him off. 

"No, no, I'm fine." Jill stood up, with no injuries from a fall that would have killed most people.

Ninja Red quickly grabbed the tablet as the robot approached him. "Voice command to Devson's Debugger! Roll back to the previous state and commit!" The yellow robot stopped reaching for him. After a moment, it stood upright and quietly walked back into position next to the larger blue robot.

"Hey," said the blue robot.

"Whassup?" said the yellow robot.

Jill walked over to Celestia while the captain talked to her. "Our goal was to get those robots in the city to move," said the officer. "We usually pay them off with energy, oil, and batteries. If you're working on another way to do it..."

Jill happily offered to help. "I can move the robots."

Ninja Red shouted back to the others. "I'm gonna go get a new holo from the ship. If you want anything, let me know." Thudnar said nothing but walked toward him. "Alright, I think I can drive one of these things." Ninja Red spoke confidently as Thudnar got into the passenger seat of the stolen car. Ninja Red entered the driver's seat. He started the engine, spun the car around, and drove into the center divider. 

"I'll go help." Jill started walking toward the car. Ninja Red gunned the engine and drove away. "Or, maybe I don't need to."

A few minutes later, the helicopter dropped Jill off in the city. Literally, as her hand slipped off the rope and she cracked the concrete when she landed. She looked up at the helicopter and waved it away with a smile to show that she was unharmed. Then she stood up and had a look around.

The nearest of the resting robots had a transparent panel in its chest. Behind it, she could see two chairs and a control system. Jill spoke into the walkie-talkie that the army had given her. "It looks like they have a driver's seat. I'm going to try to get inside." Jill put her hand in various places on the edge of the glass, which was actually plastic. She found a button in an inset depression that was hiding in plain sight on the side of the panel. She pushed the button and the panel rose up, allowing her to enter.

With Jill in the driver's seat, the robot stood up. The people in the area started to walk away, knowing that moving robots were dangerous. The alien robots did not care about people or property and would step on them.

From the highway, Celestia smiled as she saw the robot stand and move.

As with computers, Jill controlled the robot by laying her hands on its control panel and letting her nanites penetrate it. "I turned on the robot's radio, she said. "Can you hear me?"

"We copy," said the captain from the helicopter. 

"Did you know that this robot has weapons?" Jill asked over the radio. "It has, like, missiles and stuff."

Panels in the robot's armor moved aside, revealing racks of missiles, laser cannons, and a bladed weapon on the underside of one wrist. The few people who were still on the streets began running. One building after another sounded its fire alarm, and the people streamed out.

"It has a laser gun!" Jill shouted with pleasure as she aimed into the sky and fired. 

From the highway, Celestia started to worry as she saw Jill goofing off with a dangerous robot. The helicopter was beginning to land ahead of her. She ran towards it.

"This is so cool!" Jill shouted.

The robot's foot struck a parked car as she moved the robot. Knocked off balance, the robot stumbled backwards and pushed its wrist blade through the wall of a building. 

"Whoops." Jill said.

Inside the helicopter, the captain and the corporal shared a concerned look. The captain spoke into his walkie-talkie. "What is 'whoops'?" After he had spoken, Celestia climbed on board.

The relaxing robots began to complain. "Could you quiet it down?" "We're trying to rest." "You're making too much noise!"

Jill stood her robot in a threatening pose over one of the reclining robots and began making demands. "You are going to move out of the way, or I am going to move you. It is your choice."

The robot refused. "Naaaaah."

"If that's how it is." Jill's robot leaned down and began to lift the other robot by its shoulders.

"Hey! Hey!" the other robot protested. "She's interfering with our rest!" A red backlight flashed behind the robot's optical sensors, and all nearby robots called out in unison.

"OVERRIDE B-1 ACTIVATED. ENGAGE COMBAT MODE."

The robots stood and revealed their own guns, missiles, and other weapons systems. 

Jill saw the robot in front of her open its missile ports. She spun her own robot behind it just before it fired a volley into the sky. A couple of its missiles took out the tops of tall buildings.

"Oh, you want to fight?" Jill said. She sliced off the other robot's arm with her robot's wrist blade before it could attack her robot with its own, then sliced through the robot's torso, holding its upper body. "I can fight," she said pridefully.

Another robot fired its laser gun. Jill blocked the incoming fire with the upper half of the destroyed robot and returned fire with a missile. The well-aimed missile hit the target's missile magazine and caused a large explosion that sent shrapnel through the nearby cars, buildings, and robots, and left behind only the robot's head and lower legs to fall to the ground. The other robots survived the shrapnel and returned fire with their missiles and lasers. Jill's robot dodged behind the corner of a building to avoid the attacks, which punched large holes into the buildings behind her and sent the shattered wreckage of struck vehicles flying into the air.

Slackertron began to rise to his feet. "I'm going to have to get up for this."

Lasers flashed and missiles flew as Jill fought through a group of attacking robots. Skillfully using the position of each attacker to shield her robot from incoming fire from the rest, Jill used ranged fire to distract the distant robots while she assualted each robot with punches and kicks before finishing it with her robot's wrist blade. She had not practiced fighting for a while, but her tournament training showed.

"Awesome!!" Jill gleefully shouted from inside her robot after slicing off another robot's head.

The army captain watched from the helicopter, which was now in the air. "That's one way to get rid of them," he said. "Let's bring the bird down before one of them mistakes us for a target."

Celestia had a different idea. "Sir, could you bring me to our ship?"

The helicopter flew away over the highway as the stolen car returned Ninja Red and Thudnar.

Ninja Red braked hard as he stopped the car near the yellow robot. After nearly hitting the windshield, Thudnar frowned at his driver from the passenger seat. The two of them unbuckled their seat belts and got out.

The two robots that stood on the highway watched the explosions in the city.

"Maybe we oughta get involved in that," suggested the yellow robot. 

"Yeah, we oughta," agreed the blue robot.

Ninja Red put down a spare holodisplay near the yellow robot and connected the wire to its foot. "Okay, let's get this guy to move."

"Red. Red. Look." Thudnar pointed away.

Ninja Red looked up to Thudnar and then behind himself to where Thudnar was pointing. He saw the army helicopter taking off from an empty field. "What, the helicopter? There's nothing else the-- WHERE IS OUR SHIP?"

In the city, one resilient robot stepped back to dodge the attacks from Jill's battle-damaged robot. "Can I have a little help here?" the robot asked as Slackertron came around a corner.

Slackertron fired his heavy arm cannon, slicing through the abdomen of Jill's robot. As the crippled robot collapsed, it's windscreen popped out and the pilot's seat rocketed Jill up into the air as she ejected. Jill fell off the seat and landed on the other robot. Gripping tightly to it with one hand, she opened the robot's cockpit and slipped inside before it could grab her. Soon this robot was under Jill's control. She aimed and fired a laser at Slackertron, who saw the robot's hostile motion, dodged, and returned fire. Jill's new robot sidestepped away from the blast from Slackertron's arm cannon which shot through the building behind her. 

Choosing not to fight against that weapon in these circumstances, Jill retreated through a side street.

Slackertron walked away, choosing not to risk being captured. "I'll let someone else deal with this."

On the highway, Ninja Red talked to Thudnar as he worked. "I've inserted the Three Laws of Robotics so he shouldn't hurt us, hopefully. And now I'll get rid of the lock routine that has him doing nothing..."

The yellow robot stretched his arms and looked around. Seeing the two humans next to him, he looked down. "Hello there! I am taxi cab! Do you need a ride?"

Ninja Red and Thudnar warily stepped back after seeing what the robot had done the last time that it had been activated. "Uh, no thank you," Ninja Red said.

"That's fine!" The robot said cheerfully. "I'll be waiting here if you need me!" He turned and stood by the blue robot again.

Ninja Red spoke to his partner. "I think it worked. Let's go do the other one." He walked up to the yellow robot and bent down to disconnect the cable. As he stood up, he saw Sarveti's ship flying in to return to the field. "That had better be Celestia and not the boss." He saw another ship in the air, one surrounded by a golden stabilizer ring. "That's that Samson guy's ship! He works for Mick!"

Mick beamed down into the battle-damaged city wearing his Alif design of power armor and carrying a laser rifle in his hands. "Alright, Jill, where the heck are you?" He looked around at the nearby robots, and they looked down at him. Mick readied his rifle. "Are you in one of them?" A robot's eyes flashed red. "Or are you one of the bad guys?" Mick aimed at that robot. The robot fired a volley of missiles and laser beams into Mick. The barrel of his rifle broke off in the explosions. Another robot kicked Mick through a building.

A second person wearing a smaller version of the same power armor flew away from Sarveti's ship on a hover scooter. Mick's voice echoed clearly through the helmet radio. "I recommend against trying to fight them."

"Understood," Celestia replied from inside the armor.

Ninja Red and Thudnar looked at the power-armored whoever that was who was approaching quickly. "Okay, who is that?" They had not yet seen Celestia with this armor, which she had left back at Mick's base when Sarveti acquired her.

Just after he spoke, a transporter beam laid down another person, a thin-bodied figure wearing a futuristic armor of purple plates on a flexible black body with a helmet and boots of matching color. This person carred a long thin device that resembled a spear, but was technological.

"And who is this?" Ninja Red asked. Thudnar readied his axe. 

"I am Princess Siobhan Minh of Ardor," replied the young woman in the purple suit.

Ninja Red had not expected that answer. "Wait, wait, what? The wizard?" Siobhan nodded. "The wizard has a space suit?"

"Mmm-hm." Siobhan nodded again.

"I don't have a space suit!" Ninja Red complained. "I mean, there are the standard ones, but they don't count."

Celestia flew by them at that moment. She rode the hovering scooter to where traffic began to back up at the last offramp before the city, then stopped and hovered upward to survey the battle-damaged city.

She called out on the radio. "Jill, if you can hear me, speak up."

Jill replied from somewhere inside the smoking ruins. "Hi, Tia. What's up?"

Celestia spoke clearly and calmly so that Jill would understand. "Find a way to withdraw from the city while damaging as few robots as possible."

"But this is so much fun!" Jill objected. 

Celestia reminded Jill of her objective. "We intend to sell these robots if we can capture them. Each one destroyed is a lost sale." As she finished saying that, she heard the whine a jet engine. She looked up to see four jet aircraft overhead flying toward the city with large missiles their their wings. Celestia warned her friend. "Jill, find cover! Now!"

The general and the colonel were watching from the Pentagon. The colonel gave the command. "Target Slackertron. He is their leader."

Attacking in pairs, the aircraft unloaded air-to-ground missiles into the unreadly Slackertron. Badly damaged by the first salvo, Slackertron turned and attempted to aim upward before the second set of missiles blew him in half.

Celestia saw Ninja Red working on the blue robot. She reported to Jill. "My team is attempting to control two other robots. They may be able to help you escape."

Mick interceded. "Just beam her out!"

Horace Samson's voice responded. "I will need to know where she is first, and I would prefer to keep the Farseeker away from the lasers and missiles."

Celestia supported Mick's plan. "Jill, can you send a signal to Horace's ship?"

"And get me out too!" Mick added.

Soon a transporter beam placed Jill on the highway. After a brief moment of disorientation, she saw Ninja Red, Thudnar, and Siobhan. "Oh. Hello."

"Hi," Thudnar greeted her. 

Siobhan also greeted her teammate. "I am glad to see that you are well."

"Thanks," Jill said with a smile. "I hope you haven't needed to use that yet." She pointed to the shield spike in Siobhan's hand.

"Fortunately not."

Mick appeared in another tranporter beam. Celestia rode up toward him on the hover-scooter. Ninja Red could not avoid noticing that they wore the same style of armor. "Are you two clones or something?" 

"No," Celestia answered. 

Ninja Red recognized her voice, and now that she was nearer he could see that Celestia was smaller. "Oh, it's you. Of course it's you. I'm surprised I didn't figure that out."

Mick talked. "Okay, so tell me the story of these robots and what we need to do
and let's get this done because I want my fighter back."

In the city, several robots gathered around Slackertron's body. "Does anyone else want to be leader?" asked one robot. 

"I don't know," said another. "It's a lot of work." 


Scene: A Former Farm 

Dozens of robots lazed under sun lamps in a clearcut field that had once grown corn. Long extension cords powered the lamps and the robots, drawing their power from one of the nuclear power plants that the robots had built nearby. The bed of hay and fallen cornstalks formed a suitable carpet to prevent the robots from sinking into the ground.

Human soldiers attended to the robots' needs. One man wheeled over a barrel of oil that had a colorful plastic umbrella in it. "Here you are, sir."

"Thank you," said the relaxing robot.

A wooden sign at the edge of the field named the place as Robot Acres: A Place for Robots. More robots walked in or drove in as ground vehicles. A small number of them flew.

Ninja Red gave directions to the humans. "Okay, that one over there, and that one, over there." Around the edge of the field, soldiers posted odd-looking stakes that had globes on the top.

"This is nice," said a robot before taking a sip of oil.

"The humans are so nice to us," agreed the large blue robot.

The old general watched one last robot lie down on an oversized lawn chair. He spoke to Ninja Red. "I think that's all of them."

Ninja Red clapped his hands together and called out to anyone in the field. "Alright, everyone... it's BREAK TIME! Everyone, TAKE A BREAK!"

The soldiers in the field immediately dropped whatever they were doing and ran away as fast as they could. Celestia and Thudnar waved them over.

One of the robots spoke admirably of the humans. "Would you look at that. They're taking a break."

The soliders activated the stakes and walked away. Red laser beams connected the globes at their tops, forming a boundary line around the field. A flash of electricity arced across the whole area, and then in a flash the robots and stakes vanished into another dimension. 

The old general sighed and smiled. "We cannot thank you enough."