Man, sometimes it's nice to hang back and reminisce about the good times.
For real, dude.
What're you doing over here? Let me guess, you're perving out about something.
Lookin' over precious mementos from our adventures.
Ooh, like what?
I KNEW you were perving out about something.
Boy, these really take me back...
Our reviews are mementos for the public,
and these cards are mementos for ourselves.
"Cyclops Club"
You went three rounds with me... I feel so much more self-confident now!
I'm really glad I was able to get you off again in the last bit of time we had at the end!
I love these little notes they left us, too.
Yeah, I'm not about to show those to anyone else anytime soon.
The hell was this one again?
"The Demon Hole"
The Demon Hole.
Oh, we got that back during the elections.
What I can do without violating election law...
...is recommend to you a most excellent establishment.
That's the shop the demon party recommended.
Demons, huh?
Yo Meidri, where's Crim?
Oh, Crim's busy.
He went off to get spices from the old treant's shop.
Oh, man, he's gonna be at that spice shop for fuckin' ever.
The Dead Eyes of a Patient Angel
Once you hand him a spice recipe, who knows how many days it'll take to make.
You couldn’t pay me to run that errand ever again.
Umm, please wake up.
I'm awake, sonny, I'm awake.
I can't step away for a second...
Crim wouldn't wanna fuck a demon anyway, given their strong dark aspect.
Might as well go whole we've got the chance.
Good idea. Sounds like it's finally time for us to get all up in the Demon's Hole,
if you know what I mean!
I think I do!
God, they're pathetic.
Welcome. Upon whose recommendation have you come to us today?
Who recommended us? Well, here's the card.
Let me see...
I see, Demon Two...
Esteemed gentlemen, we are so grateful you've graced us with your presence!
Damn, her attitude changed on a dime.
Now, sirs, with which of these lovely ladies would you like to enter into a pleasure contract?
Well, hot damn.
Access to the full lineup? Talk about customer service.
They've got quite the variety, too...
Yeah, check out the height differences.
Demons come in all shapes and sizes.
Well, might as well get a taste.
I'll take you, since you're the biggest!
Okay!
I'll go with a girl who's more my size.
I'll have you.
And I'll take that one.
Of course, thank you very much!
Thank you again for choosing our establishment tonight.
You must be exhausted; please, relax, and take your time.
This is delicious.
Excellent wine, too.
Boy, guess this kind of high-level customer service is normal here.
Nah, it is WAY too good to be normal.
Hey, if we walked in on here like any other customer, would we get this kind of service?
Why, of course not!
What?!
Man, she didn't even hesitate.
You see, we demons are a species that are bound by contracts.
Contracts?
Yes! Demons love enforcing and being bound by contracts.
To the point where it's basically our fetish.
A contract fetish...
So we certainly wouldn't give great service to a customer without a contract.
We'd probably just wonder how we can squeeze every last bit of money out of him.
She's not even sugar-coatin' it...
This might help explain it: think about marriage. It's a form of contract, right?
You hear a lot how demon wives won't get jobs, are really bossy, and are just downright terrible.
But that only happens because they were proposed to in the wrong way.
I promise to make you happy! Will you marry me?
Yes!
If that's how you propose to her...
She'll start bossing him around, expecting him to make her happy all the time
Well, shit.
But if you instead say...
Let's get married and be happy together!
Yes!
You'll get...
...a demon wife who'll support her husband through thick and thin!
No way!
Yes way. That's just how things work with demons.
That being said...
Yeah?
That proposal would only mean she'd have to make them happy as a couple,
so she'd be a great wife, but a terrible mother.
"The Demon Hole" "Demon Two"
This business card is a recommendation from the Demon Party itself.
It's basically a contract with the Demon Lord Death Abyss.
We need to give you the best customer service we can offer, and answer any and all of your questions,
or we'd be in breach of contract with the Demon Lord herself.
Ohh, that's why they had us come review you.
What's that mean?
Elections are basically like making a contract with the citizens of the land, right?
"Better magical technology for a better life!"
That'd mean the Demon Lord would make good on her campaign promises.
If more people knew that demons would honor their contracts to the letter,
then more people might start listening to her campaign speeches.
That's a big win for the party in itself.
Makes sense.
Guess that Demon Two PR guy knew what he was doing.
People probably wouldn't have trusted him if he'd up and said "hey, demons love contracts!”
As weird as it sounds, it would sound a lot more credible coming from a sex review rag like us.
Pardon me for asking, but why didn't you come by during the election?
I mean, we tried, but...
We got sucked into that titty vortex next door.
I-I see.
"Read your one-to-two hour pleasure contract very carefully,
then sign away your soul for a fiendish fuck-session!
Looks like they reviewed that Demon Hole.
Stunk, Zel, and Brooz gave it a seven, while Kanchal gave it an eight.
Pretty high marks all around.
Huh, so if you make a contract with a demon, they'll honor it no matter what.
An unexpected quality, indeed.
Man, why don't you go lose your V-card already?
You hold out any longer and you'll be a full-fledged wizard.
I simply want to treasure that special occasion when the time comes.
Carefully choosing your words during your proposal determines the type of wife you'll get?
I see, demons are an interesting species for sure!
I'd been avoiding that Demon Hole, but now I'm thinkin' we should stop by.
Their demon review spread far and wide.
...as for its influence,
there's been a large public response to the section that speaks to demonkind's love for contracts,
particularly the parts discussing marriage proposals.
A number of individuals haver voiced their complaints, asking why they were never told this earlier.
Wait, hold on. The review is out NOW?
The election ended months ago, and I lost!
Yes, but improving our species' reputation amongst the general public
will take at least a century of consistent effort, I believe.
If the public learns how to properly propose to demon women and "turn" them into good wives and mothers,
we may see that followed by a drastic improvement in public opinion.
I swear.
Our bad reputation is caused solely by other species making terribly-worded contracts with our kind!
It seems our upwards battle has only just begun!
Indeed.
Alright, let's give it our all!
My papers!
After a century of toil, the Demon Party will reign supreme!
Oh, Demia. I haven't seen you in a while.
Keep up the hard work, Death Abyss.
I'm really looking forward to the day your party takes power.
It'll make my life so much easier.
So, what do you need?
Oh, right! I'm looking for a special something,
and was hoping I could borrow some of your demon lair's hyperpure mana measurement devices.
What special something?
Sure, use them as you like.
I want to hear how that other endeavor turned out.
Those "air-planes" those kids who get sent there from other worlds always talk about.
Think you can make one?
Oh, no way.
We might be able to make them fly,
but they'd get blown to bits by our walls of mana.
Just "ka-boom".
Apparently, the technology in the other worlds all functions under the premise that mana doesn't exist.
I suppose we could make use of something like one of their steam engines, though.
Really? I'd be very interested in that sort of resear-
Right, then, fund it!
O-once we're in power...
Who knows how many centuries that will take?
I'd rather focus on developing new technologies in our own world,
instead of wasting my time on some outsider technology that may not even be useful.
Let them have their tech; we have ours.
Awww, but air-planes are so cool!
They're so fast, and can carry tons of passengers!
Man, it's so unfair that they get to live in such a cool world!
I'd totally trade magic for air-planes!
Oh, you don't want to live in a world without magic.
Do you know what they do in succubus shops in worlds without magic?
What do you mean?
How do they protect against pregnancy or disease?
I suppose they couldn't use a standard magic circle to do that, huh.
You suppose correctly.
Then what do they do?
First, they put a balloon-like piece of thin rubber of the the client's manhood,
by rolling it over, like this.
Huh? What do they do after that?
After that, they just...
Stick it in.
They ran succubus shops like that?! How is that supposed to be reliable protection?!
God! These other worlds are terrifying!
Aren't they? Why would anyone want to live in a world without magic?
Yeah, you're right.
One Week Later
Nearly done...
The Dead Eyes of a Patient Angel (Day 7)
The Dead Eyes of a Patient Angel, Day 7.
Thank you for supporting the Ale 'n Eats this year, everyone!
Our eastern window faces the Flaspa Cathedral!
It's almost time.
Yep.
- Let's keep up the good work next year. - Can't believe the year's over.
The new year's bells will ring soon!
Um, Zel, what's everyone doing?
What?! We're praying to God for the new year!
You're an angel! How do you NOT know that?!
Oh, I didn't know that was a custom down here on Earth...
Don't drop that kind of bomb on us like it doesn't matter!
I mean, if God really answered prayers, I'd probably be home by now.
Am I doing it right?
DUDE!
You're an angel! You can't go saying this kind of shit around people!
You're going to destroy our whole goddamn religion at this rate!
O-okay! Happy new year, everyone!
I hope you'll keep supporting us this year!
See? You've turned this celebration into a goddamn wake!
S-sorry...
Eh, the new year's prayer is just a tradition, that's all.
You don't have to think too hard about it.
There's a way more important tradition you should be concerned about.
Got an idea as to what that is, Crim, my boy?
Let me guess, it's definitely not 'putting together a resolution', right?
You're probably thinking of hitting up a nice brothel to start the year off right.
Hmmm, you're close, real close.
Let me tell you of this important tradition.
You've gotta go to the girl you rated highest over the last year and make her your first fuck!
If you don't have a good time on your first fuck, you'll have shit luck for the whole year!
That's right!
O-okay...
Does that mean we're going to head out to the Magic Metropolis?
Don't be stupid!
Sure, we might've given it a perfect score,
but we can't go that far out of our way.
We're pickin' someplace close.
Let's look over our reviews and pick which place we're going to next!
Out of all the girls I rated highly...
I'd probably have to pick an elf for my first fuck.
Yeah, I'm gonna go with Mitsue-san.
I would've liked to see that birdmaid again, too.
I wish that birdmaid joint was closer.
What I wouldn't give to have another go at those sensitive bodies that sing with every thrust...
Oh, that's an idea!
Hey, Meidri, how about a night with-
I'm sorry, did you want to die before the new year's even begun?
Sorry, Meidri.
I did find the perfect shop last year.
Which one?
The golem shop!
I've been there give times now.
You can make whoever you want at the Sex Marionette!
Princesses, idols, legendary warriors!
You can even make girls you know in real life!
It's absolutely perfect, heaven on-
If you make me again, you're dead meat.
I-I know, okay?!
Sheesh, someone's in a murdering mood early this year...
How 'bout you, Crim?
Hmmm.
I'd have to go with the lotion witch...
Or maybe Elza the Hyena.
Mmm, Elza...
I kinda miss her.
Maybe I'll go see her as I am, without a gender-change potion.
Oh, Elza...
Most of my reviews have pretty low scores.
Guess I've gotta go for my go-to girl, little miss Ice!
Okay!
Interspecies Reviewers, let's get our fuck on!
Yeah!
Y-yeah.
Let's get that first fuck of the year done!
They're all busy.
Can't stick it in if they won't let us in...
Hey, there, if it ain't the jizz journos.
Hey, you're from that fairy joint.
Your article did wonders for us.
Thanks to you, well, look:
business is booming, or should I say, banging.
No Vacancy By Reservation Only (Waiting list for cancellations)
I don't remember giving you that high of a score.
You still got lots of business from it?
Every species has loads of guys who ain't feelin' confident about the size of their package.
Plus, your scores don't really mean much! It's just your personal opinion, really.
I guess.
Besides, nobody's looking at the score.
They care more about getting accurate info and honest opinions, you know what I mean?
Makes sense.
Forget that, though, why're you all alone out here?
You got that look on your faces that you wanted to get a first fuck in with your favorite gal,
but some other bastards cucked you by bookin' reservations in advance.
You're so spot on, it hurts, dammit!
Here you go, boys.
Think of it as my thanks for all the business.
It's tiny!
Check out the joint on the card.
I guarantee you'll have a good time.
This is our first fuck! It's damn important!
How'll you make it up to us if you're wrong?
If you're not satisfied, I'll get you off with a body-job.
No way I'm gonna waste my first fuck on some old, skanky fairy...
This the place?
Looks kind of sketchy.
'Scuse me, we're here on a recommendation!
Oh? Why, if it isn't my cute li'l angel.
E-Elza?!
I-I didn't know you worked here!
I do, sometimes.
I just get called in to work at the Gender-Swap Inn every now and then.
So?
You here to be my woman again?
Oh, no...
Uhh, I'm here as a man today...
Or rather, as both, so, uh...
Really? 'Cause you look like a cute little lady to me.
Nobody's here.
Huh? Where'd Crim go?
Wow, it's been so long!
I'm so glad you came back to see us!
Mitsue-san?!
I can't wait to spend another year with you, sweetie!
What's going on?
Eldry and Demia's clones should be miles away, but here they are!
They must be shapeshifting off cur memories.
So they're not the real deal...
But the girls you want to bang will suddenly appear?
Gotta be honest with you...
I got zero problems with that!
Okay, you're gonna be my first fuck!
Let's go get it on!
Yeah!
Right here, yeah?
That's where you like it, huh?
We banged in the new year at a dream-eater joint!
That's how I was able get down and dirty with a hard-to-find birdmaid!
They can conjure up any girl you had a good time with before!
I had an absolute blast.
Nine outta ten!
Let little old Mitsue take of you, sweetie!
They say the first dream of the year's important, so why not start with a wet dream?
Nine outta ten!
I-I'm gonna go crazy...
More, please!
You don't need to come here to be with your favorite girl, but it is cheaper.
Plus, when you wake up, you can have sex with the dream-eater, too! Pretty damn sweet, yeah?
Nine out of ten!
I had a good time, but one downside is you ain't makin' any new memories with your favorite girl.
If you keep coming here, you'll lose regular status with the real-life succu-girl, so just be careful.
Seven outta ten.
Bein' this cute should be a crime, my darling angel.
E-Elza...
My partner pinned me down and showed me an amazing time...
And then I woke up and found out it was all a dream. It was a little depressing.
That said, it was a pretty nice dream.
I can't think of a better dream to start off the year with.
Seven out of ten.
They haven't swung by for bodyjobs, so they must've had a good time with those dream eaters.
Man, that kinda blows.
Only kind of, though.
Dream-eaters, hmm? They say life itself is a fleeting dream.
Man, do you even listen to yourself?
You got something to say, Meidri?
Read it again! This place does reenactments, that's all.
You can't sleep with a girl you haven't already slept with before.
I'm always down to review y-
I-it's not like I made her or anything...
So I'm totally safe, right? Yeah, I'm safe.
No harm, no fowl...
O-our virgin friend!
He transformed into a wizard!
He protected his virginity until thirty!
I knew that virgin could do it!
- Virgin! Virgin! Virgin! - All glory be to the succu-girls!
Virgin! Virgin! Virgin!
Man, that was easy.
Yeah. That does it for that quest.
Let's go find us some succu-girls, yeah?
Sounds good.
Hey, your hometown's not too far from here, right?
Know any good brothels?
Lemme think.
There aren't any, really..
Apart from my dad's harem...
Harem's not bad, though...
Wanna hit up his harem, then?
Oh?
Those harem girls will let us make them totally ours!
Could be fun!
Sounds like we know what our next review's gonna be!
Hell yeah!
In this world, there are humans,
elves, fairies, beastmen,
monsters, spirits, angels, and demons.
Truly, a melting pot of sentient creatures.
As such, this wonderful world abound with diversity...
...is, naturally, abound with a diverse selection of brothels.
These myriad brothels, and the girls who work there – succu-girls –
are reviewed by a group of brave adventurers!
They are...
the Interspecies Reviewers!