News anchor:
We're now on day five of the mysterious satellite incident here at the downtown Radio Building.
Throngs of onlookers continue to flock in the street below in hopes of catching a firsthand glimpse.
And as no country has yet come forward to claim the offending object,
it's anyone's guess when life here will return to normal.
...
Can we have a moment of your time?
You're... here to get a look at the satellite I assume, yes?
Could you tell our viewers at home where you've traveled from?
[Opening]
Suzuha:
Wowza! Are you kidding?
It's awesome!
Daru:
This, like, your first beef bowl?
Suzuha
Yep! And I've gotta say, the hype doesn't do them justice!
Okabe:
Hmm. Yes, well, you really ought to try it with raw egg sometime.
That is of course once you've mastered this unwarriorlike phobia of eating out alone.
Suzuha/Daru:
Eww.
Okabe:
Daru and I only dine together out of convenience, you understand.
You're more than welcome to join us whenever you'd like.
Daru:
Hey! It's coming back to me. The last time we came here,
you totally skipped out and left me with the check!
Okabe:
I do concede that as a distinct possibility.
Daru:
Try a distinct damn-right-ibility! Where're my greenbacks, bogart?
Okabe:
Not the day to bark up that tree, I'm afraid.
It's me... Kindly make the aforementioned monetary transfers into my Swiss bank account, if you would.
That one, yes. Wait, what?
The organization is playing havoc with Geneva's Financial Sector...
Waitress:
Please no cell phones!
Daru:
Uh, does it count if the conversation's all in his head?
Okabe:
...This is unprecedented! What am I going to do? Shove my hedge funds to the Cayman Islands!?
Mayuri:
Tu-tu-roo!
I didn't know you were a part of the group now.
Suzuha:
Oh, I was just on the ol' lunch break, y'know?
You shoulda come around earlier! It would've been a party.
Daru:
I propose we do this again tomorrow, all of us! Okarin's treat!
Okabe:
N-n-n-n-n-n-no, don't put me on hold!
Crisis or not, it can take the banks a full week to straggle back online!
Mayuri:
Cool! The gang's all here!
Okabe:
004, well rested I trust?
Makise:
Don't start with that crap again.
Mr. Braun:
Hey, I hate to break up your meeting, but your lunch break ended five minutes ago.
Makise:
What's that about?
[...]
Mayuri:
Round table?
Okabe:
Yep.
Daru:
That like a thing?
Okabe:
A lab member powwow, indeed.
Daru:
You make it sound like we do 'em all the time.
Makise:
Only table I see here is rectangular.
Okabe:
Ugh, I don't mean it literally. "Round table" is simply a figure of speech meant to evoke camaraderie.
Makise:
Thank you, I'm quite familiar with the expression--I'm just never sure whether you mean things literally or not.
Mayuri:
I think it sounds sweet, even if it is rectangular.
Okabe:
Thank you.
Mayuri:
You're welcome! So, let's start. Who's gonna bring the "camamerie"?
Yeah, what now, Chief, you pull a sword from a stone?
I'd like to point out that as a temporary member, I shouldn't be eligible to attend.
Oh my goodness... fine! I grant you special privileges.
Moving on! Our needs must be to apprise Mayuri of Notre Dilemme (Our Dilemma)?
Uh-oh, what's that?
In short, my minions, if we intend to nip SERN's odious design in the proverbial bud,
perfecting the "Phone Wave" (Real Name TBA)'s incipient functionality is absolutely paramount.
Aww... you use so many big words, the little ones around them don't make sense either.
Let me put it this way then: SERN is very, very bad.
OK, but what do you mean by perfecting it though?
I mean we already sent text back in time. What, what else do you think...?
True, but in point of fact, we've only done so twice.
Flying blind, I might add. No, we have to look for patterns.
Well then, we know from the last experiment, it only seems to work when there's an electrical discharge.
EUREKA!
A flash of inspiration?
No, it's just that "Mail From the Past" is too inelegant.
If we expect to be inspired, we must first christen the phenomena with a decent name.
How about... "Cart Before the Horse"?
Not helpful!
Continue to mock me and my wrath shall hammer down upon...
Please! You get sidetracked thinking up a name for a screwdriver.
Excuse me! Prepare to eat your words, naysayer!
I've already plucked a name for the facts in question as if from thin air.
We shall call it... "Kyoma's Nostalgia Drive"!
...I propose referring to it as KND for short. Catchy anagrams are far more marketable.
Sounds like a fast-food chain.
Duly noted, temporary assistant! Now, if you'll just let those of us--
I say we have a show of hands.
Who here's good with "Kyoma's Nostalgia Drive"?
Oh, come on! Neither of you?
Sorry I agree with her. It's not a bad name.
But even when you don't use the letters, it makes me think of a charity.
Yeah, besides, "Kyoma"? Nice try.
In the interest of keeping it cute and simple,
...since it goes against the flow of time, why not call it "Contrari-Mail"?
I don't get it.
You have a lot to learn about cute.
Why are we arguing when it should clearly be "The Mail That Leapt Through Time"?
Because we're not entering it into a film festival.
Now you're just being a brat!
At least my idea doesn't make you wanna order a bucket of chicken wings.
Balance, man! We need romance and concision!
Then I'll squish it to "Time Leaper."
Except that now we don't know what's leaping, do we?
Maybe we could work "banana" in there somewhere.
Ohhh, can you imagine our logo?
Too-too-roo! Ha! Just wait till you get a load of this one! We call it "Flux Mail Capacitor"!
[Reference: Flux Capacitor is a fictional device appeared in Back to the Future series. It uses plutonium as fuel.]
Are we implying that it runs on plutonium now?
Ooh, ooh, "DeLorean Mail"!
That doesn't make sense.
Close enough! Though if we go with that, I suggest we shorten it to "D-Mail."
Oh! That's a good one.
Great! We can move on. Finally.
We now begin our experiments with D-Mail (Real Name TBA).
Drop the "TBA." We've got it.
Fine! I dub this "Operation Urd...
You can drop that too.
I'd like to get back to the whole we-don't-have-a-clue-what's-happening issue.
I mean, we're pretty sure the electrical surges are related, but that's about it.
Precisely what we've gathered here to establish, Hack.
Thanks to my genius, however, we're not shooting in the dark.
You, dear cohorts, have overlooked the simplest yet most crucial condition involved--to wit: time!
The first e-mail made its apparent leap backward between noon and one o'clock,
...the second at approximately six in the evening.
Thus, if we conduct our experiment so that the same windows are observed, success is a strong likelihood.
Dude, if it were that easy, you think we'd be the ones to discover it?
If you can do better, I'm all ears. Mayuri! Banana me!
Aww... we're running kind of low on the test subjects.
We could just use something else, couldn't we?
Maybe a cucumber.
Hack, this is hardly the time.
No, the effect on bananas classifies as a known, so if you would be so good as to insert what we have left...
"Insert"! hehe...
Oh, grow up! I swear.
I'm sorry, sweetie. Look, I promise to buy you some more as soon as we're done here.
Oh really? These two guys never buy me anything.
It's gonna be awesome having you around the lab, I can tell!
Ow!
Please, enough with the showboating.
Shut up!
Leave my friend alone, ouchies.
Oh, it's not that bad.
Put away the tea set, Princess Ow. There's work to do. Send me a text.
Okay, okay!
A minute thirty good for the timer?
Yes. Commence "Operation Urd."
Now!...
Ha ha ha ... Ha ha ha ... Yes! That's it! Show me what you've got!
The fruit is where?
It's a gel-nana. It worked.
Whoa!
Ha ha ha ... Just as I hypothesized, time of day is an essential component in how the D-Mail system works. I am a genius!
Nice job, Okabe! I was kind of inclined to doubt you at first, but ...
Ah... Forgiven! It's quite enough to see that you were appropriately awed by my intellect.
Aha, aha, aha, aha!
Whatever. Did you get the text?
Indeed. Five days ago to be exact.
Yeah, but there's two. Did you send another one?
Uh-uh, just the one.
Interesting. It's been split up.
I'm not familiar with this vernacular.
In America, it's a compliment.
You know, now that I think about it, your D-mail to me the other day was all broken up, too.
Part of it was cut off as a matter of fact.
And 'course it popped up five days earlier.
I know, right? Probably some physical law.
Wait, that would mean that my head is full of air.
There is no way that's a compliment.
How are you just now getting that?
That vile little minx and her infernal insults, Blast!
You're stocking up for the end of times? Ramen and one... one bag of paraffin chocolate is more than enough.
Looks like you're amping up for a bender.
What? A guy can't celebrate a successful experiment?
Put them back, Lard Silo.
Screw. You.
Ha ... My God!
I was so excited about our success, I neglected to weigh the reality of what we've uncovered here.
Mayuri's knee-deep in on this too. Why on earth did I tell her?
Well, if it isn't my old pen pal, Shining Finger.
Yes. Hi!
What is wrong with you? I'm right here.
Where... where's your phone?
Well, I'd tell you if you are authorized to be briefed on the epoch ushering experiment, it is currently central to ...
Ready when you are ..
.. suffice to say it's not here ..
Uhm, boss? Who is this bang-worthy, I mean, totally respectful young meatspace angel with a knock-out ass in front...
How rude of me ... Daru! Meet Kiryu Moeka aka shining finger.
Hello there! My lovely lady.
...and just like that a man's dropkicked back into the shady underworld of all night RPGs.
Yo, check it! You party people bringin' the rockets or what?
In a manner of speaking, our researches will indeed bring as you say the...
Yeah, that's real crunk and all, but...
...Papa bald cap is seriously pissed off at you guys, said the vibrations from your floor are giving him migraines.
"You want your rent to give you a damn migraine!?" I can't do the voice, but you get it.
Damn it all.
Hack, Run upstairs and tell the girls to suspend all experimentation. I'll try and sweet-talk the cur.
Roger, I am on top of it. Good luck not getting evicted.
Is Makise Kurisu still up there?
Huh? She is, but I don't understand what that could possibly mean to you.
Why are you giving her the evil eye? What happened in your past?
Nothing happened in the past.
I see it now. You were turtle fishing and she carelessly let slip, through her fingers, the finest red-eared slider ....
Stop it! I've never seen her before.
Why you here gabbin' with me anyway, shouldn't you be groveling?
Don't know what you're doing up there and I don't wanna know,
...but if it involves an elephant, you're in breach of your lease.
Well, I can assure you sir it is not a pachyderm, though it is definitely huge.
Not to worry though.
You'll be vexed no more today.
Why aren't you stopping?
Did I or did I not give you orders to desist?
Hey I told them to ... She is the one who kept on.
I sent you another one. Did it go through?
How am I supposed to know?
You had your phone on you five days ago.
Stop mocking!
Oh that's right. Your phone rang like a bazillion times while you were gone, even when we were running tests.
Ugh, she was five feet from me for half of these.
Who are you mad at?
Oh just ignore him, hon. He's running low on calcium.
I am not.
I realize you're preoccupied but if you think it's important,
...I gleaned enough data to work up a rough sketch of how D-mail works.
What?
I've calculated that one second on the timer equals an hour in reality.
Moving upstream to the flow of linear time, that means a minute thirty translates to five days.
Pretty balls out she locked onto how to control the distance a text travels back, huh?
Indeed. Being limited to 36 characters is still our Achilles' heel.
I'd like to find a way to improve upon that if at all possible.
As it stands now, it's not very practical.
Well, that's not such a big deal if you don't have to send anything really large back in time.
Hey, maybe it's hard because of the whole Carb black hole thing.
I think you mean Kerr black holes.
That's it. A Kerr black whole is too tight to let big stuff through.
Maybe it just needs a little... practice.
Will you knock it off?
I suggest... rest.
We can hit the problem with fresh minds tomorrow.
Each of us should feel proud of what's been accomplished here today.
Because of us, August 2nd 2010 is now a date that will live in the hearts of mankind forever.
On this day, the future gadget laboratory breathed new life into a dream as old as the hills!
For we have bridled time!
Well except that SERN kind of already beat us to it.
And saying we've bridled that is presumptuous. We are still stuck in the preliminary phase.
I'm attempting to be poetic here! Must you insist on sapping the thunder out of every single utterance?
Okarin, I am super proud of what we've all accomplished here.
Ha ....
Where am I? ....
[Don't panic. You are not the one moving.]
[Time and space have switched places here.]
So, this is an event horizon?
[Space can no longer be moved through,
...and time as you understand it ceases to exist.]
[One second to you, for me stretches out past the horizon line of what is real.]
Are you saying that space is falling away? That time has no part of it?
What's moving then? Me or the universe?
[Don't look back. Eternity isn't infinite.]
[Reality has a beginning and an end.]
[Always has, always will.]
If that's true, where does that leave for me?
[Move forward. Look over the edge.]
You are on my last nerve. For crying out loud, get a life.
"Sorry about yesterday. I really need to drop by and talk to you soon."
Does it not occur to you that people sleep?
Who the hell wouldn't be at this hour?
What?
Seriously? I am right here.
Whatever it is, just say it. Look, this is getting ridiculous, and it's very early.
Wait, is it your idea of hounding yours truly for an exclusive interview or something?
Why won't you speak?
Ah, of course,
...the aura of big bad legendary mad scientist Hououin Kyoma robs yet another innocent lamb of her powers of speech. M ha ha ...
It's just easier, sending texts. I came here to, ah well you know, .. see the IBN.
Very well, but see is all you shall do.
That done, you will leave at once. Understood?
Maybe she's just part of what Daru calls the antiquing crowd.
Feel free, but beware. Photograph my face and you will leave me no choice but to silence...
You expect me to let you borrow it? And help you haul it?
What part of "look only" do you fail to comprehend, my dear?
Besides if you intend to make off with it, you can at least do me the kindness of asking out loud.
May I please borrow it?
I'm afraid you're out of luck there.
I myself only have it on loan for an interval from a trusted friend.
I am honor bound to return it once my research has arrived an end.
So who did you borrow it from?
Some friends from Yanabayashi Shrine.
Good morrow, my peeps.
Oh, hey, I didn't realize we had a guest.
Ah you recall my friend from yesterday.
This rotund fellow is nothing less than my right hand man. Our good Hack, Daru.
Hacker. Thank you very much.
Had a couple ideas how we might turn up the phone wave a notch by the way.
I mean it's such an ass pain as is.
Some serious tweakage is needed if we're gonna make sending mails to the past user-friendly, am I right?
Ah. Yes, you misheard him.
He didn't say "sending mails to the past." He said [gibberish] Ancient Sumerian, you see, Yes. Yes ... roughly translated means ...
Tuttu roo! Good morning, Okarin!
Mind if I heated my chicken tenders before you start your time travel experiment?
Morning everyone. I think I had an Aha moment about the time machine last night.
It's me. Situation critical. No. No. An outsider's caught wind of numeral 8.
Yes, of course! I'll handle it!
Ok, what is it this time?
Apparently involves ignoring the three of us.
What ever happens, we can't afford to let the organization know, we're performing experiments similar to...
Damn it all, I'm trying to have a conversation.
Is it true?
FB?
Very well.
I suppose since the cat's out of the bag.
I'm loath to do this however,
Kiryu Moeka, ... as of this moment, .. I christen you lab member 005.
We're now on day five of the mysterious satellite incident here at the downtown Radio Building.
Throngs of onlookers continue to flock in the street below in hopes of catching a firsthand glimpse.
And as no country has yet come forward to claim the offending object,
it's anyone's guess when life here will return to normal.
...
Can we have a moment of your time?
You're... here to get a look at the satellite I assume, yes?
Could you tell our viewers at home where you've traveled from?
[Opening]
Suzuha:
Wowza! Are you kidding?
It's awesome!
Daru:
This, like, your first beef bowl?
Suzuha
Yep! And I've gotta say, the hype doesn't do them justice!
Okabe:
Hmm. Yes, well, you really ought to try it with raw egg sometime.
That is of course once you've mastered this unwarriorlike phobia of eating out alone.
Suzuha/Daru:
Eww.
Okabe:
Daru and I only dine together out of convenience, you understand.
You're more than welcome to join us whenever you'd like.
Daru:
Hey! It's coming back to me. The last time we came here,
you totally skipped out and left me with the check!
Okabe:
I do concede that as a distinct possibility.
Daru:
Try a distinct damn-right-ibility! Where're my greenbacks, bogart?
Okabe:
Not the day to bark up that tree, I'm afraid.
It's me... Kindly make the aforementioned monetary transfers into my Swiss bank account, if you would.
That one, yes. Wait, what?
The organization is playing havoc with Geneva's Financial Sector...
Waitress:
Please no cell phones!
Daru:
Uh, does it count if the conversation's all in his head?
Okabe:
...This is unprecedented! What am I going to do? Shove my hedge funds to the Cayman Islands!?
Mayuri:
Tu-tu-roo!
I didn't know you were a part of the group now.
Suzuha:
Oh, I was just on the ol' lunch break, y'know?
You shoulda come around earlier! It would've been a party.
Daru:
I propose we do this again tomorrow, all of us! Okarin's treat!
Okabe:
N-n-n-n-n-n-no, don't put me on hold!
Crisis or not, it can take the banks a full week to straggle back online!
Mayuri:
Cool! The gang's all here!
Okabe:
004, well rested I trust?
Makise:
Don't start with that crap again.
Mr. Braun:
Hey, I hate to break up your meeting, but your lunch break ended five minutes ago.
Makise:
What's that about?
[...]
Mayuri:
Round table?
Okabe:
Yep.
Daru:
That like a thing?
Okabe:
A lab member powwow, indeed.
Daru:
You make it sound like we do 'em all the time.
Makise:
Only table I see here is rectangular.
Okabe:
Ugh, I don't mean it literally. "Round table" is simply a figure of speech meant to evoke camaraderie.
Makise:
Thank you, I'm quite familiar with the expression--I'm just never sure whether you mean things literally or not.
Mayuri:
I think it sounds sweet, even if it is rectangular.
Okabe:
Thank you.
Mayuri:
You're welcome! So, let's start. Who's gonna bring the "camamerie"?
Yeah, what now, Chief, you pull a sword from a stone?
I'd like to point out that as a temporary member, I shouldn't be eligible to attend.
Oh my goodness... fine! I grant you special privileges.
Moving on! Our needs must be to apprise Mayuri of Notre Dilemme (Our Dilemma)?
Uh-oh, what's that?
In short, my minions, if we intend to nip SERN's odious design in the proverbial bud,
perfecting the "Phone Wave" (Real Name TBA)'s incipient functionality is absolutely paramount.
Aww... you use so many big words, the little ones around them don't make sense either.
Let me put it this way then: SERN is very, very bad.
OK, but what do you mean by perfecting it though?
I mean we already sent text back in time. What, what else do you think...?
True, but in point of fact, we've only done so twice.
Flying blind, I might add. No, we have to look for patterns.
Well then, we know from the last experiment, it only seems to work when there's an electrical discharge.
EUREKA!
A flash of inspiration?
No, it's just that "Mail From the Past" is too inelegant.
If we expect to be inspired, we must first christen the phenomena with a decent name.
How about... "Cart Before the Horse"?
Not helpful!
Continue to mock me and my wrath shall hammer down upon...
Please! You get sidetracked thinking up a name for a screwdriver.
Excuse me! Prepare to eat your words, naysayer!
I've already plucked a name for the facts in question as if from thin air.
We shall call it... "Kyoma's Nostalgia Drive"!
...I propose referring to it as KND for short. Catchy anagrams are far more marketable.
Sounds like a fast-food chain.
Duly noted, temporary assistant! Now, if you'll just let those of us--
I say we have a show of hands.
Who here's good with "Kyoma's Nostalgia Drive"?
Oh, come on! Neither of you?
Sorry I agree with her. It's not a bad name.
But even when you don't use the letters, it makes me think of a charity.
Yeah, besides, "Kyoma"? Nice try.
In the interest of keeping it cute and simple,
...since it goes against the flow of time, why not call it "Contrari-Mail"?
I don't get it.
You have a lot to learn about cute.
Why are we arguing when it should clearly be "The Mail That Leapt Through Time"?
Because we're not entering it into a film festival.
Now you're just being a brat!
At least my idea doesn't make you wanna order a bucket of chicken wings.
Balance, man! We need romance and concision!
Then I'll squish it to "Time Leaper."
Except that now we don't know what's leaping, do we?
Maybe we could work "banana" in there somewhere.
Ohhh, can you imagine our logo?
Too-too-roo! Ha! Just wait till you get a load of this one! We call it "Flux Mail Capacitor"!
[Reference: Flux Capacitor is a fictional device appeared in Back to the Future series. It uses plutonium as fuel.]
Are we implying that it runs on plutonium now?
Ooh, ooh, "DeLorean Mail"!
That doesn't make sense.
Close enough! Though if we go with that, I suggest we shorten it to "D-Mail."
Oh! That's a good one.
Great! We can move on. Finally.
We now begin our experiments with D-Mail (Real Name TBA).
Drop the "TBA." We've got it.
Fine! I dub this "Operation Urd...
You can drop that too.
I'd like to get back to the whole we-don't-have-a-clue-what's-happening issue.
I mean, we're pretty sure the electrical surges are related, but that's about it.
Precisely what we've gathered here to establish, Hack.
Thanks to my genius, however, we're not shooting in the dark.
You, dear cohorts, have overlooked the simplest yet most crucial condition involved--to wit: time!
The first e-mail made its apparent leap backward between noon and one o'clock,
...the second at approximately six in the evening.
Thus, if we conduct our experiment so that the same windows are observed, success is a strong likelihood.
Dude, if it were that easy, you think we'd be the ones to discover it?
If you can do better, I'm all ears. Mayuri! Banana me!
Aww... we're running kind of low on the test subjects.
We could just use something else, couldn't we?
Maybe a cucumber.
Hack, this is hardly the time.
No, the effect on bananas classifies as a known, so if you would be so good as to insert what we have left...
"Insert"! hehe...
Oh, grow up! I swear.
I'm sorry, sweetie. Look, I promise to buy you some more as soon as we're done here.
Oh really? These two guys never buy me anything.
It's gonna be awesome having you around the lab, I can tell!
Ow!
Please, enough with the showboating.
Shut up!
Leave my friend alone, ouchies.
Oh, it's not that bad.
Put away the tea set, Princess Ow. There's work to do. Send me a text.
Okay, okay!
A minute thirty good for the timer?
Yes. Commence "Operation Urd."
Now!...
Ha ha ha ... Ha ha ha ... Yes! That's it! Show me what you've got!
The fruit is where?
It's a gel-nana. It worked.
Whoa!
Ha ha ha ... Just as I hypothesized, time of day is an essential component in how the D-Mail system works. I am a genius!
Nice job, Okabe! I was kind of inclined to doubt you at first, but ...
Ah... Forgiven! It's quite enough to see that you were appropriately awed by my intellect.
Aha, aha, aha, aha!
Whatever. Did you get the text?
Indeed. Five days ago to be exact.
Yeah, but there's two. Did you send another one?
Uh-uh, just the one.
Interesting. It's been split up.
I'm not familiar with this vernacular.
In America, it's a compliment.
You know, now that I think about it, your D-mail to me the other day was all broken up, too.
Part of it was cut off as a matter of fact.
And 'course it popped up five days earlier.
I know, right? Probably some physical law.
Wait, that would mean that my head is full of air.
There is no way that's a compliment.
How are you just now getting that?
That vile little minx and her infernal insults, Blast!
You're stocking up for the end of times? Ramen and one... one bag of paraffin chocolate is more than enough.
Looks like you're amping up for a bender.
What? A guy can't celebrate a successful experiment?
Put them back, Lard Silo.
Screw. You.
Ha ... My God!
I was so excited about our success, I neglected to weigh the reality of what we've uncovered here.
Mayuri's knee-deep in on this too. Why on earth did I tell her?
Well, if it isn't my old pen pal, Shining Finger.
Yes. Hi!
What is wrong with you? I'm right here.
Where... where's your phone?
Well, I'd tell you if you are authorized to be briefed on the epoch ushering experiment, it is currently central to ...
Ready when you are ..
.. suffice to say it's not here ..
Uhm, boss? Who is this bang-worthy, I mean, totally respectful young meatspace angel with a knock-out ass in front...
How rude of me ... Daru! Meet Kiryu Moeka aka shining finger.
Hello there! My lovely lady.
...and just like that a man's dropkicked back into the shady underworld of all night RPGs.
Yo, check it! You party people bringin' the rockets or what?
In a manner of speaking, our researches will indeed bring as you say the...
Yeah, that's real crunk and all, but...
...Papa bald cap is seriously pissed off at you guys, said the vibrations from your floor are giving him migraines.
"You want your rent to give you a damn migraine!?" I can't do the voice, but you get it.
Damn it all.
Hack, Run upstairs and tell the girls to suspend all experimentation. I'll try and sweet-talk the cur.
Roger, I am on top of it. Good luck not getting evicted.
Is Makise Kurisu still up there?
Huh? She is, but I don't understand what that could possibly mean to you.
Why are you giving her the evil eye? What happened in your past?
Nothing happened in the past.
I see it now. You were turtle fishing and she carelessly let slip, through her fingers, the finest red-eared slider ....
Stop it! I've never seen her before.
Why you here gabbin' with me anyway, shouldn't you be groveling?
Don't know what you're doing up there and I don't wanna know,
...but if it involves an elephant, you're in breach of your lease.
Well, I can assure you sir it is not a pachyderm, though it is definitely huge.
Not to worry though.
You'll be vexed no more today.
Why aren't you stopping?
Did I or did I not give you orders to desist?
Hey I told them to ... She is the one who kept on.
I sent you another one. Did it go through?
How am I supposed to know?
You had your phone on you five days ago.
Stop mocking!
Oh that's right. Your phone rang like a bazillion times while you were gone, even when we were running tests.
Ugh, she was five feet from me for half of these.
Who are you mad at?
Oh just ignore him, hon. He's running low on calcium.
I am not.
I realize you're preoccupied but if you think it's important,
...I gleaned enough data to work up a rough sketch of how D-mail works.
What?
I've calculated that one second on the timer equals an hour in reality.
Moving upstream to the flow of linear time, that means a minute thirty translates to five days.
Pretty balls out she locked onto how to control the distance a text travels back, huh?
Indeed. Being limited to 36 characters is still our Achilles' heel.
I'd like to find a way to improve upon that if at all possible.
As it stands now, it's not very practical.
Well, that's not such a big deal if you don't have to send anything really large back in time.
Hey, maybe it's hard because of the whole Carb black hole thing.
I think you mean Kerr black holes.
That's it. A Kerr black whole is too tight to let big stuff through.
Maybe it just needs a little... practice.
Will you knock it off?
I suggest... rest.
We can hit the problem with fresh minds tomorrow.
Each of us should feel proud of what's been accomplished here today.
Because of us, August 2nd 2010 is now a date that will live in the hearts of mankind forever.
On this day, the future gadget laboratory breathed new life into a dream as old as the hills!
For we have bridled time!
Well except that SERN kind of already beat us to it.
And saying we've bridled that is presumptuous. We are still stuck in the preliminary phase.
I'm attempting to be poetic here! Must you insist on sapping the thunder out of every single utterance?
Okarin, I am super proud of what we've all accomplished here.
Ha ....
Where am I? ....
[Don't panic. You are not the one moving.]
[Time and space have switched places here.]
So, this is an event horizon?
[Space can no longer be moved through,
...and time as you understand it ceases to exist.]
[One second to you, for me stretches out past the horizon line of what is real.]
Are you saying that space is falling away? That time has no part of it?
What's moving then? Me or the universe?
[Don't look back. Eternity isn't infinite.]
[Reality has a beginning and an end.]
[Always has, always will.]
If that's true, where does that leave for me?
[Move forward. Look over the edge.]
You are on my last nerve. For crying out loud, get a life.
"Sorry about yesterday. I really need to drop by and talk to you soon."
Does it not occur to you that people sleep?
Who the hell wouldn't be at this hour?
What?
Seriously? I am right here.
Whatever it is, just say it. Look, this is getting ridiculous, and it's very early.
Wait, is it your idea of hounding yours truly for an exclusive interview or something?
Why won't you speak?
Ah, of course,
...the aura of big bad legendary mad scientist Hououin Kyoma robs yet another innocent lamb of her powers of speech. M ha ha ...
It's just easier, sending texts. I came here to, ah well you know, .. see the IBN.
Very well, but see is all you shall do.
That done, you will leave at once. Understood?
Maybe she's just part of what Daru calls the antiquing crowd.
Feel free, but beware. Photograph my face and you will leave me no choice but to silence...
You expect me to let you borrow it? And help you haul it?
What part of "look only" do you fail to comprehend, my dear?
Besides if you intend to make off with it, you can at least do me the kindness of asking out loud.
May I please borrow it?
I'm afraid you're out of luck there.
I myself only have it on loan for an interval from a trusted friend.
I am honor bound to return it once my research has arrived an end.
So who did you borrow it from?
Some friends from Yanabayashi Shrine.
Good morrow, my peeps.
Oh, hey, I didn't realize we had a guest.
Ah you recall my friend from yesterday.
This rotund fellow is nothing less than my right hand man. Our good Hack, Daru.
Hacker. Thank you very much.
Had a couple ideas how we might turn up the phone wave a notch by the way.
I mean it's such an ass pain as is.
Some serious tweakage is needed if we're gonna make sending mails to the past user-friendly, am I right?
Ah. Yes, you misheard him.
He didn't say "sending mails to the past." He said [gibberish] Ancient Sumerian, you see, Yes. Yes ... roughly translated means ...
Tuttu roo! Good morning, Okarin!
Mind if I heated my chicken tenders before you start your time travel experiment?
Morning everyone. I think I had an Aha moment about the time machine last night.
It's me. Situation critical. No. No. An outsider's caught wind of numeral 8.
Yes, of course! I'll handle it!
Ok, what is it this time?
Apparently involves ignoring the three of us.
What ever happens, we can't afford to let the organization know, we're performing experiments similar to...
Damn it all, I'm trying to have a conversation.
Is it true?
FB?
Very well.
I suppose since the cat's out of the bag.
I'm loath to do this however,
Kiryu Moeka, ... as of this moment, .. I christen you lab member 005.
Ah, ...
Hum, ...
[END]