Host club members:
Haruhi-chan, please come out and play!
Tamaki:
Sorry we have the wrong apartment!
Ranka:
Hey, hey, wait a second!
Don't act so traumatized cause you've seen me without my make up on.
Even trannies get stubble first thing in the morning, which is more than I can say for any of you.
Tamaki:
You're so funny!
Ha! ha! ha!
My dear Ranka, I hope this day finds you in excellent health.
Ranka, please...
That's my head...
Ranka:
Oh, silly me!
I forgot my manners.
Please forgive my appearance.
It's so wonderful to see all of you.
Honey:
Is Haru-chan here?
Ranka:
I'm afraid not.
She's out with the girls today.
They picked her up this morning and you know women, heaven only knows when they'll be back.
Honey:
So she's not home?
Tamaki:
Well, I guess Haruhi is entitled to spend time with her old friends from middle school once in a while.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
I can't believe she has friends.
Kyoya:
This is why I was against a surprise visit.
Ranka:
You know, come to think of it, I'm not sure that I recognized any of her new friends.
But then again, you never can tell, can you? Haruhi always has made friends easily.
Just imagine it, my little girl out and about with students from Lobelia Academy.
Tamaki:
Did you say...
Hikaru:
Lo-
Kaoru:
be-
Tamaki:
li-
Tamaki, Hikaru and Kaoru:
-aah!
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Benibara:
St. Lobelia Academy, high school 2nd-year, Benio Amakusa.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Suzuran:
2nd-year student, Chizuru Maehara.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Hinagiku:
And, 1st-year Hinako Tsuwabuki.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Benibara:
Together, we are St. Lobelia Academy's illustrious white lily league, also known as...
Zuka club members:
The Zuka club!
Girls:
Oh lady Benibara, good morning to you!
Benibara:
Why good morning, my dears.
You look ravishing.
Girl:
I, I took it upon myself to prepare lunch for you today, lady Benibara.
It's your favorite, little octopus-shaped cocktail wienies!
Benibara:
Thank you.
Oh, the irony.
Why my dear, you are just as red and adorable as the octopus.
Could it be you wish[ed] for me to feast on you?
Girl:
Lady Benibara, I volunteer to be eaten!
Guard:
Simmer down, people!
Guard:
Keep your places in line!
Guard:
Hey, I said no passing notes without permission!
Guard:
Please remain calm, everyone!
Guard:
Those in front, crouch down!
Suzuran:
Your fan club executives certainly run a tight ship.
They must be exhausted.
Hinagiku:
I don't envy them one bit.
Benibara:
Chizuru, where is our guest?
Suzuran:
In the changing room, of course.
Hinagiku:
How's that size?
Benibara:
You're gorgeous, maiden.
I mean, Haruhi.
"The Lobelia Girls’ Academy Strikes Back!"
Suzuran:
You look absolutely beautiful!
Hinagiku:
You look like a princess ripped from the pages of a fairy tale!
Benibara:
Oh my dear, you and that uniform were destined for each other.
It's most befitting an innocent girl like you.
Yes, one still unfamiliar with young love's first tender kiss.
Ranka:
Oh!
Oh no!
What if the Zuka Club entices Haruhi to do something outrageously scandalous?!
Tamaki:
Entices her?
Honey:
Something scandalous?
Ranka:
Just suppose she's forced to kiss somebody!
Tamaki:
Kiss?!
Hikaru:
As I recall..
Kaoru:
There was that dance party where...
Tamaki:
Aren't they a laugh?
Ranka:
Just what exactly goes on at that Host Club of yours, Suoh?
Tamaki:
Why?
Nothing that a loving father wouldn’t approve of…
We must rescue Haruhi without delay!
Benibara:
Maiden!
Haruhi:
Hey, will you wait a minute?!
Stop it!
Get off!
Now hold on!
What is this?!
Could someone explain it to me?
'Cause one moment, I'm on my way to the supermarket and the next (time) I'm brought here.
Haruhi:
I'll be back in a bit.
Ranka:
Be careful!
Suzuran:
Target...
Hinagiku:
Captured!
Haruhi:
Wait!
What the?!
Ranka:
Wow, Lobelia...
Benibara:
Good, bring her in.
Suzuran and Hinagiku:
Roger!
Haruhi:
Hold on.
Where are we going?!
Haruhi:
The three of you have about as much subtlety as the Host Club does.
Benibara:
How dare you maiden?!
We are nothing like those idiots!
Oh, forgive my outburst!
It's only natural for you to be upset, after all in our haste, we whisked you away this morning in your night shirts.
Haruhi:
Those weren't pajamas, you know.
That happens to be the way I usually dress.
Does rudeness just come with a territory when you're rich?
Benibara:
All theatrics aside maiden, we have a small favor to ask of you.
As you may know, one of our responsibilities in the Zuka Club is to arrange a regular performance of musical numbers and original plays.
Suzuran:
Today is called the Pink Carnation Day when we celebrate the birth of the White Lily League's founder by putting on the most glorious production of the entire year.
We've been rehearsing non-stop in preparation for today's performance.
Hinagiku:
Tragically, the lead actress in our play was in a terrible accident and is currently in the hospital.
But even so, without her, you know what they say, the show must go on.
Which means...
Zuka club members:
This is your big opportunity to be apart of the theater!
Haruhi:
I can't.
Not a chance.
I'm sorry.
Benibara:
You would only have to memorize a handful of lines.
For most of the play, the character you'll be portraying is silent.
Suzuran:
The role is actually more symbolic than anything.
Benibara:
She just stands there looking beautiful.
Hinagiku:
You can manage that now, can't you?
We promise it'll be the easiest thing ever.
Haruhi:
I'll let myself out.
Benibara:
Oh!
Forgive me!
I will forever fall short of your legacy!
You must be so ashamed!
Oh, mother!
Suzuran:
Benio...
Hinagiku:
Don't talk like that!
Haruhi:
So then, your mother...
Suzuran:
Benio's late mother was a distinguished graduate of Saint Lobelia Academy, prominent of the White Lily League
To this day it's said no woman looks lovelier in men's clothing.
Hinagiku:
That's right!
To honor her, we celebrate Pink Carnation Day with the same flare for pageantry that made the woman's name so enormous with the Zuka Club.
Her whole life, Benio has dreamed of nothing more than to follow in her mother's footsteps!
Benibara:
If today's performance is canceled, that dream will be dashed against the craggy shores of fate.
Haruhi:
That sounds just awful...
Ranaka:
If my daughter is held captive in there, I'm not going to sit back and do nothing.
But we have to play it cool.
The Zuka Club is ruthless.
Once you become tangled in their web of lies, you can go bankrupt trying to get yourself out again.
Honey:
How do you know so much, sir?
Kyoya:
Haruhi doesn't really seem like the type that would get involved with their kind.
Ranka:
You're right.
But, neither did Kotoko.
She'd always seem like she was such a strong woman.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
Kotoko?
Kyoya:
Haruhi's late mother.
Someone she's always looked up to very much and unconsciously attempts to imitate.
There may be some connection between her and the infamous Zuka Club.
Ranka:
I was so blind then.
We were newlyweds and I was in love.
Ranka:
So what are we having for dinner, my reason for living?
Kotoko:
Miso soup with mezashi and rice, sweetheart.
Ranka:
That's excellent!
You both need your calcium!
Hikaru and Kaoru:
What's mezashi?
Kyoya:
They're dried salted sardines.
Ranka:
Don't interrupt my flash back!
One day, while cleaning, I discovered my wife's dirty little secret.
What?!
Her collection of Zuka Club memorabilia!
Hikaru:
What are we going to do?
Kaoru:
What if Haruhi wants to join the Zuka Club so she can be more like her Mother?
Honey:
Is Haru-chan really going to go bankrupt?
She's practically broke already!
Tamaki:
Don't worry.
Our girl is worth a small fortune and cute.
Haruhi:
I know I'm as flat as a board, but if you please just take pity on me...
Tamaki, Hikaru and Kaoru:
That's even worse!
Tamaki:
Kyoya, order us some Lobelia uniforms right now!
We're going undercover!
Ranka:
Overruled!
Men who only dress in women's clothing recreationally are an insult to us professionals.
You don't want to insult me, do you?
Do you?
Now, listen up!
To infiltrate Lobelia, you'll have to do exactly as I tell you!
Exactly!
Tamaki:
Um, can I get up now?
Benibara:
Oh, Marianne, how many lonely nights have I prayed that we'd be together again and how many times are the powers that be demanded that we remained apart?
That our love is forbidden...
Haruhi:
Oh my lord Frederick.
Benibara:
Oh!
I'm slain by this fatal gunshot wound!
Alas, I'm to draw breath no more.
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick.
Benibara:
Marianne, with your arms holding me close, all this pain becomes not.
I am overwhelmed with peace.
Lovely angel, your gaze is my paradise and you are the very image of my beloved Mother.
Haruhi:
This guy is sure to talk a lot when someone is supposed to be dying.
I wonder how long he can hold out.
I think there be time to get a doctor or something.
My lord Frederick.
Honey:
Can you see her?
What is she doing?
Tamaki:
It looks as though she’s playing the heroine of some sentimental tragedy.
But...
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick.
Host club members:
She sounds like a robot...
A boring daikon radish...
Ranka:
Even as a father, I can't stand this.
Hikaru:
Someone, please make her stop.
Tamaki:
How many times is she going to repeat that line?
Kaoru:
I think she’s about to start singing.
Ranka:
No!
Her grades in music have always been absolutely awful!
Haruhi:
Here, in this moment, I am loosing nothing.
Even if you leave me, I won't be alone.
Because love has taught me that this life is still worth living and the skies above can't stop me...
Honey:
Huh?
Hinagiku:
Oh, I'm sorry, my foot got tangled up in the cord.
Suzuran:
Be careful.
Ranka:
Oh, she's lip synching.
Honey:
Lip synching?
Girl:
Hey newbies!
If you want to be apart of the Benibara fan club, you have to follow the rules! Now up on your feet!
To be a full fledged member, your contact must be on approach at all times! Now all together!
With enthusiasm!
Let me hear those fan club mottos!
Benibara funs and host club members:
Lady Benibara, please hang in there for your adoring fans today!
Lady Benibara, you look magnificent!
Lady Benibara, please hang in there for your adoring fans today!
Tamaki:
Okay, now that I worried, what's the rest of your plan?
Ranka:
Blend in!
If you want to get close to the Zuka club, you got to prove you're die heart fun.
And watch yourself.
These girls get pretty competitive even more than you could imagine.
Girl:
Right, let's give a rest.
Girl:
Glad to have you, newbies
Girl:
What do you like most about Lady Benibara?
Ranka:
Oh ho!
Only everything!
The way she walks and sings and the way she looks in coat tails!
Why even the shape of her head!
Hikaru and Kaoru:
He’s a professional.
He's got blending in with the ladies down to in an art!
Girl:
I'm just so excited to see the play!
It's supposed to be a tragedy.
Girl:
It's called the Senorita's Love.
Lord Frederick fakes his own suicide as revenge against his father for coming between he and his lover Marianne, but the gun he uses is supposedly filled with blanks is actually filled with live rounds!
Girl:
Oh, that's so terrible.
GIrl:
I have my suspicions about the girl playing Marianne though.
Girl:
Whoever she is, if she ruins Lady Benibara's play, our very own maiden warriors will be waiting patiently in the wing to critique her performance.
Hikaru:
If Haruhi has to put on a performance in front of these psychos, she'll be done for.
Honey:
They'll beat the daylights out of her!
Ranka:
Haruhi!
Tamaki:
Don't you worry.
We're going to get her out of that place.
And yet, even as we speak, the curtain's rising is nearly upon us.
Benibara:
So, you've found your way in after all, you vulgar and incompetent host club.
My dears, it's almost time!
Now I'm counting on you.
Remember.
I want us to think of today as our audition for the Crimson Goddesses!
Haruhi:
Huh?
Ranka:
Hold on.
Where did Kyoya run off to?
Tamaki:
Now that you've mentioned it, I haven't seen him in a while.
Honey:
Hey look!
He's up there!
Woman:
It is such an honor having one of the Otori boys dropping by to pay us a visit.
Tamaki:
That jackass...
Kaoru:
He moves quickly.
Kyoya:
Very nice setup.
And that's the orchestra pit I take it?
Woman:
That's right.
And just above that, we have our fully equipped digital back drop.
Here, let me show you.
We can project any high resolution image and use it as part of the scenery without unnecessary set changes.
Isn't technology just amazing?
Kyoya:
Yes.
Tamaki:
At this point, we'll just have to rescue Haruhi mid show.
Mori:
Here's her entrance.
Haruhi:
Ah, I can see the sky, the sun...
Tamaki:
Heavy!
Your makeup is too heavy, Haruhi.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
I can't bear to see her like this.
Tamaki:
Enough!
I'm getting her out of here right...
Ranka:
Wait.
Just look at her up there.
She's so much more radiant than she was in rehearsal.
Tamaki:
Well, her cheeks are rosier.
Hikaru:
That'd be the makeup.
Tamaki:
Her skin looks like it's glowing.
Kaoru:
That'd be the lights.
Tamaki:
You're right.
We can't interfere in the middle of her performance.
She's having the time of her life.
Let her have her moment.
We can sneak her out of here after lights.
Haruhi:
Oh, my lord Frederick!
Benibara:
I am slain by this fatal gunshot wound!
Alas, I am to draw breath no more...
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick!
Benibara:
Marianne, with your arms holding me close, all this pain becomes not.
My soul is overwhelmed with peace..
Girl:
The kiss scene is coming up!
Girl:
But the scene falls just short of their embrace, right?
GIrl:
Of course.
Lady Benibara would never actually kiss her.
Tamaki:
Kiss scene?
Girl:
In the Senorita's Love, lord Frederick fakes suicide to take revenge against his father for coming between he and his lover Marianne.
Tamaki:
Kiss scene...
Revenge?
Benibara:
Ah, and yet, the love I bare for you and the desire I have for revenge are not things which can so simply be forgotten.
Haruhi:
Senpai?
And dad?
Benibara:
Right before his eyes, I'll steal your first kiss...
Haruhi:
Huh?
Benibara:
All for the sake of revenge.
Girl:
No, Lady Benibara!
Girl:
You can't really kiss her!
Tamaki:
Never in a million years will daddy allow his Haruhi to be used in such a despicable way!
Banana!?
Benibara:
Victory is mine, you poor incompetent buffoon!
Now behold while we embrace.
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Benibara:
My love...
Haruhi:
You're crazy, lady.
Kyoya:
Yes, please forward that photo to me immediately.
Haruhi:
Stop it!
Get off of me!
Benibara:
Oh no!
Tamaki:
That picture is from the dance party...
Hikaru:
So, as you see...
Kaoru:
Haurhi's already had her first kiss.
Ranka:
Haruhi!
So was that what those are in that degenerate Host Club?!
Hikaru:
Hearing that from her transvestite Father...
Kaoru:
Seems kind of ironic.
Ranka:
You're going to explain this photograph to me right this instant, young lady!
Benibara:
Maiden, you mean to tell me!
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Jump down!
I'll catch you!
Benibara:
No!
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Haruhi:
I'm sorry, senpai.
Ranka:
Haruhi, how could you do this to your adoring father!?
Suzuran and Hinagiku:
Not so fast, Marianne.
Tamaki:
Must protect my Haruhi...
Benibara:
Don’t let her go!
This is not over yet!
I don’t care how many kisses she’s had.
The next one will be mine.
Haruhi:
Man, all I wanted to do today was go shopping...
Haruhi:
So, why did Hikaru and Kaoru join the host club?
Tamaki:
Because I, the host club king, personally scouted them out.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
Don't get any ego or anything.
Haruhi:
Next time, "The Door the Twins Opened!"
Tamaki:
The ouran host club will be waiting for you.
Haruhi-chan, please come out and play!
Tamaki:
Sorry we have the wrong apartment!
Ranka:
Hey, hey, wait a second!
Don't act so traumatized cause you've seen me without my make up on.
Even trannies get stubble first thing in the morning, which is more than I can say for any of you.
Tamaki:
You're so funny!
Ha! ha! ha!
My dear Ranka, I hope this day finds you in excellent health.
Ranka, please...
That's my head...
Ranka:
Oh, silly me!
I forgot my manners.
Please forgive my appearance.
It's so wonderful to see all of you.
Honey:
Is Haru-chan here?
Ranka:
I'm afraid not.
She's out with the girls today.
They picked her up this morning and you know women, heaven only knows when they'll be back.
Honey:
So she's not home?
Tamaki:
Well, I guess Haruhi is entitled to spend time with her old friends from middle school once in a while.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
I can't believe she has friends.
Kyoya:
This is why I was against a surprise visit.
Ranka:
You know, come to think of it, I'm not sure that I recognized any of her new friends.
But then again, you never can tell, can you? Haruhi always has made friends easily.
Just imagine it, my little girl out and about with students from Lobelia Academy.
Tamaki:
Did you say...
Hikaru:
Lo-
Kaoru:
be-
Tamaki:
li-
Tamaki, Hikaru and Kaoru:
-aah!
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Benibara:
St. Lobelia Academy, high school 2nd-year, Benio Amakusa.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Suzuran:
2nd-year student, Chizuru Maehara.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Hinagiku:
And, 1st-year Hinako Tsuwabuki.
Zuka club members:
Lobelia.
Benibara:
Together, we are St. Lobelia Academy's illustrious white lily league, also known as...
Zuka club members:
The Zuka club!
Girls:
Oh lady Benibara, good morning to you!
Benibara:
Why good morning, my dears.
You look ravishing.
Girl:
I, I took it upon myself to prepare lunch for you today, lady Benibara.
It's your favorite, little octopus-shaped cocktail wienies!
Benibara:
Thank you.
Oh, the irony.
Why my dear, you are just as red and adorable as the octopus.
Could it be you wish[ed] for me to feast on you?
Girl:
Lady Benibara, I volunteer to be eaten!
Guard:
Simmer down, people!
Guard:
Keep your places in line!
Guard:
Hey, I said no passing notes without permission!
Guard:
Please remain calm, everyone!
Guard:
Those in front, crouch down!
Suzuran:
Your fan club executives certainly run a tight ship.
They must be exhausted.
Hinagiku:
I don't envy them one bit.
Benibara:
Chizuru, where is our guest?
Suzuran:
In the changing room, of course.
Hinagiku:
How's that size?
Benibara:
You're gorgeous, maiden.
I mean, Haruhi.
"The Lobelia Girls’ Academy Strikes Back!"
Suzuran:
You look absolutely beautiful!
Hinagiku:
You look like a princess ripped from the pages of a fairy tale!
Benibara:
Oh my dear, you and that uniform were destined for each other.
It's most befitting an innocent girl like you.
Yes, one still unfamiliar with young love's first tender kiss.
Ranka:
Oh!
Oh no!
What if the Zuka Club entices Haruhi to do something outrageously scandalous?!
Tamaki:
Entices her?
Honey:
Something scandalous?
Ranka:
Just suppose she's forced to kiss somebody!
Tamaki:
Kiss?!
Hikaru:
As I recall..
Kaoru:
There was that dance party where...
Tamaki:
Aren't they a laugh?
Ranka:
Just what exactly goes on at that Host Club of yours, Suoh?
Tamaki:
Why?
Nothing that a loving father wouldn’t approve of…
We must rescue Haruhi without delay!
Benibara:
Maiden!
Haruhi:
Hey, will you wait a minute?!
Stop it!
Get off!
Now hold on!
What is this?!
Could someone explain it to me?
'Cause one moment, I'm on my way to the supermarket and the next (time) I'm brought here.
Haruhi:
I'll be back in a bit.
Ranka:
Be careful!
Suzuran:
Target...
Hinagiku:
Captured!
Haruhi:
Wait!
What the?!
Ranka:
Wow, Lobelia...
Benibara:
Good, bring her in.
Suzuran and Hinagiku:
Roger!
Haruhi:
Hold on.
Where are we going?!
Haruhi:
The three of you have about as much subtlety as the Host Club does.
Benibara:
How dare you maiden?!
We are nothing like those idiots!
Oh, forgive my outburst!
It's only natural for you to be upset, after all in our haste, we whisked you away this morning in your night shirts.
Haruhi:
Those weren't pajamas, you know.
That happens to be the way I usually dress.
Does rudeness just come with a territory when you're rich?
Benibara:
All theatrics aside maiden, we have a small favor to ask of you.
As you may know, one of our responsibilities in the Zuka Club is to arrange a regular performance of musical numbers and original plays.
Suzuran:
Today is called the Pink Carnation Day when we celebrate the birth of the White Lily League's founder by putting on the most glorious production of the entire year.
We've been rehearsing non-stop in preparation for today's performance.
Hinagiku:
Tragically, the lead actress in our play was in a terrible accident and is currently in the hospital.
But even so, without her, you know what they say, the show must go on.
Which means...
Zuka club members:
This is your big opportunity to be apart of the theater!
Haruhi:
I can't.
Not a chance.
I'm sorry.
Benibara:
You would only have to memorize a handful of lines.
For most of the play, the character you'll be portraying is silent.
Suzuran:
The role is actually more symbolic than anything.
Benibara:
She just stands there looking beautiful.
Hinagiku:
You can manage that now, can't you?
We promise it'll be the easiest thing ever.
Haruhi:
I'll let myself out.
Benibara:
Oh!
Forgive me!
I will forever fall short of your legacy!
You must be so ashamed!
Oh, mother!
Suzuran:
Benio...
Hinagiku:
Don't talk like that!
Haruhi:
So then, your mother...
Suzuran:
Benio's late mother was a distinguished graduate of Saint Lobelia Academy, prominent of the White Lily League
To this day it's said no woman looks lovelier in men's clothing.
Hinagiku:
That's right!
To honor her, we celebrate Pink Carnation Day with the same flare for pageantry that made the woman's name so enormous with the Zuka Club.
Her whole life, Benio has dreamed of nothing more than to follow in her mother's footsteps!
Benibara:
If today's performance is canceled, that dream will be dashed against the craggy shores of fate.
Haruhi:
That sounds just awful...
Ranaka:
If my daughter is held captive in there, I'm not going to sit back and do nothing.
But we have to play it cool.
The Zuka Club is ruthless.
Once you become tangled in their web of lies, you can go bankrupt trying to get yourself out again.
Honey:
How do you know so much, sir?
Kyoya:
Haruhi doesn't really seem like the type that would get involved with their kind.
Ranka:
You're right.
But, neither did Kotoko.
She'd always seem like she was such a strong woman.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
Kotoko?
Kyoya:
Haruhi's late mother.
Someone she's always looked up to very much and unconsciously attempts to imitate.
There may be some connection between her and the infamous Zuka Club.
Ranka:
I was so blind then.
We were newlyweds and I was in love.
Ranka:
So what are we having for dinner, my reason for living?
Kotoko:
Miso soup with mezashi and rice, sweetheart.
Ranka:
That's excellent!
You both need your calcium!
Hikaru and Kaoru:
What's mezashi?
Kyoya:
They're dried salted sardines.
Ranka:
Don't interrupt my flash back!
One day, while cleaning, I discovered my wife's dirty little secret.
What?!
Her collection of Zuka Club memorabilia!
Hikaru:
What are we going to do?
Kaoru:
What if Haruhi wants to join the Zuka Club so she can be more like her Mother?
Honey:
Is Haru-chan really going to go bankrupt?
She's practically broke already!
Tamaki:
Don't worry.
Our girl is worth a small fortune and cute.
Haruhi:
I know I'm as flat as a board, but if you please just take pity on me...
Tamaki, Hikaru and Kaoru:
That's even worse!
Tamaki:
Kyoya, order us some Lobelia uniforms right now!
We're going undercover!
Ranka:
Overruled!
Men who only dress in women's clothing recreationally are an insult to us professionals.
You don't want to insult me, do you?
Do you?
Now, listen up!
To infiltrate Lobelia, you'll have to do exactly as I tell you!
Exactly!
Tamaki:
Um, can I get up now?
Benibara:
Oh, Marianne, how many lonely nights have I prayed that we'd be together again and how many times are the powers that be demanded that we remained apart?
That our love is forbidden...
Haruhi:
Oh my lord Frederick.
Benibara:
Oh!
I'm slain by this fatal gunshot wound!
Alas, I'm to draw breath no more.
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick.
Benibara:
Marianne, with your arms holding me close, all this pain becomes not.
I am overwhelmed with peace.
Lovely angel, your gaze is my paradise and you are the very image of my beloved Mother.
Haruhi:
This guy is sure to talk a lot when someone is supposed to be dying.
I wonder how long he can hold out.
I think there be time to get a doctor or something.
My lord Frederick.
Honey:
Can you see her?
What is she doing?
Tamaki:
It looks as though she’s playing the heroine of some sentimental tragedy.
But...
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick.
Host club members:
She sounds like a robot...
A boring daikon radish...
Ranka:
Even as a father, I can't stand this.
Hikaru:
Someone, please make her stop.
Tamaki:
How many times is she going to repeat that line?
Kaoru:
I think she’s about to start singing.
Ranka:
No!
Her grades in music have always been absolutely awful!
Haruhi:
Here, in this moment, I am loosing nothing.
Even if you leave me, I won't be alone.
Because love has taught me that this life is still worth living and the skies above can't stop me...
Honey:
Huh?
Hinagiku:
Oh, I'm sorry, my foot got tangled up in the cord.
Suzuran:
Be careful.
Ranka:
Oh, she's lip synching.
Honey:
Lip synching?
Girl:
Hey newbies!
If you want to be apart of the Benibara fan club, you have to follow the rules! Now up on your feet!
To be a full fledged member, your contact must be on approach at all times! Now all together!
With enthusiasm!
Let me hear those fan club mottos!
Benibara funs and host club members:
Lady Benibara, please hang in there for your adoring fans today!
Lady Benibara, you look magnificent!
Lady Benibara, please hang in there for your adoring fans today!
Tamaki:
Okay, now that I worried, what's the rest of your plan?
Ranka:
Blend in!
If you want to get close to the Zuka club, you got to prove you're die heart fun.
And watch yourself.
These girls get pretty competitive even more than you could imagine.
Girl:
Right, let's give a rest.
Girl:
Glad to have you, newbies
Girl:
What do you like most about Lady Benibara?
Ranka:
Oh ho!
Only everything!
The way she walks and sings and the way she looks in coat tails!
Why even the shape of her head!
Hikaru and Kaoru:
He’s a professional.
He's got blending in with the ladies down to in an art!
Girl:
I'm just so excited to see the play!
It's supposed to be a tragedy.
Girl:
It's called the Senorita's Love.
Lord Frederick fakes his own suicide as revenge against his father for coming between he and his lover Marianne, but the gun he uses is supposedly filled with blanks is actually filled with live rounds!
Girl:
Oh, that's so terrible.
GIrl:
I have my suspicions about the girl playing Marianne though.
Girl:
Whoever she is, if she ruins Lady Benibara's play, our very own maiden warriors will be waiting patiently in the wing to critique her performance.
Hikaru:
If Haruhi has to put on a performance in front of these psychos, she'll be done for.
Honey:
They'll beat the daylights out of her!
Ranka:
Haruhi!
Tamaki:
Don't you worry.
We're going to get her out of that place.
And yet, even as we speak, the curtain's rising is nearly upon us.
Benibara:
So, you've found your way in after all, you vulgar and incompetent host club.
My dears, it's almost time!
Now I'm counting on you.
Remember.
I want us to think of today as our audition for the Crimson Goddesses!
Haruhi:
Huh?
Ranka:
Hold on.
Where did Kyoya run off to?
Tamaki:
Now that you've mentioned it, I haven't seen him in a while.
Honey:
Hey look!
He's up there!
Woman:
It is such an honor having one of the Otori boys dropping by to pay us a visit.
Tamaki:
That jackass...
Kaoru:
He moves quickly.
Kyoya:
Very nice setup.
And that's the orchestra pit I take it?
Woman:
That's right.
And just above that, we have our fully equipped digital back drop.
Here, let me show you.
We can project any high resolution image and use it as part of the scenery without unnecessary set changes.
Isn't technology just amazing?
Kyoya:
Yes.
Tamaki:
At this point, we'll just have to rescue Haruhi mid show.
Mori:
Here's her entrance.
Haruhi:
Ah, I can see the sky, the sun...
Tamaki:
Heavy!
Your makeup is too heavy, Haruhi.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
I can't bear to see her like this.
Tamaki:
Enough!
I'm getting her out of here right...
Ranka:
Wait.
Just look at her up there.
She's so much more radiant than she was in rehearsal.
Tamaki:
Well, her cheeks are rosier.
Hikaru:
That'd be the makeup.
Tamaki:
Her skin looks like it's glowing.
Kaoru:
That'd be the lights.
Tamaki:
You're right.
We can't interfere in the middle of her performance.
She's having the time of her life.
Let her have her moment.
We can sneak her out of here after lights.
Haruhi:
Oh, my lord Frederick!
Benibara:
I am slain by this fatal gunshot wound!
Alas, I am to draw breath no more...
Haruhi:
My lord Frederick!
Benibara:
Marianne, with your arms holding me close, all this pain becomes not.
My soul is overwhelmed with peace..
Girl:
The kiss scene is coming up!
Girl:
But the scene falls just short of their embrace, right?
GIrl:
Of course.
Lady Benibara would never actually kiss her.
Tamaki:
Kiss scene?
Girl:
In the Senorita's Love, lord Frederick fakes suicide to take revenge against his father for coming between he and his lover Marianne.
Tamaki:
Kiss scene...
Revenge?
Benibara:
Ah, and yet, the love I bare for you and the desire I have for revenge are not things which can so simply be forgotten.
Haruhi:
Senpai?
And dad?
Benibara:
Right before his eyes, I'll steal your first kiss...
Haruhi:
Huh?
Benibara:
All for the sake of revenge.
Girl:
No, Lady Benibara!
Girl:
You can't really kiss her!
Tamaki:
Never in a million years will daddy allow his Haruhi to be used in such a despicable way!
Banana!?
Benibara:
Victory is mine, you poor incompetent buffoon!
Now behold while we embrace.
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Benibara:
My love...
Haruhi:
You're crazy, lady.
Kyoya:
Yes, please forward that photo to me immediately.
Haruhi:
Stop it!
Get off of me!
Benibara:
Oh no!
Tamaki:
That picture is from the dance party...
Hikaru:
So, as you see...
Kaoru:
Haurhi's already had her first kiss.
Ranka:
Haruhi!
So was that what those are in that degenerate Host Club?!
Hikaru:
Hearing that from her transvestite Father...
Kaoru:
Seems kind of ironic.
Ranka:
You're going to explain this photograph to me right this instant, young lady!
Benibara:
Maiden, you mean to tell me!
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Jump down!
I'll catch you!
Benibara:
No!
Tamaki:
Haruhi!
Haruhi:
I'm sorry, senpai.
Ranka:
Haruhi, how could you do this to your adoring father!?
Suzuran and Hinagiku:
Not so fast, Marianne.
Tamaki:
Must protect my Haruhi...
Benibara:
Don’t let her go!
This is not over yet!
I don’t care how many kisses she’s had.
The next one will be mine.
Haruhi:
Man, all I wanted to do today was go shopping...
Haruhi:
So, why did Hikaru and Kaoru join the host club?
Tamaki:
Because I, the host club king, personally scouted them out.
Hikaru and Kaoru:
Don't get any ego or anything.
Haruhi:
Next time, "The Door the Twins Opened!"
Tamaki:
The ouran host club will be waiting for you.
Host club members:
We'll see you then.