Kyoya's father:
Since adopting the zaibatsu system as its corporate model generations ago, the Orori group has advanced the medical field to unprecedented highs.
Today we continue that proud history of innovation and leadership through our cutting edge approach to hospital administration.
Our prospective successor to this legacy will do well to remember that merely standing in the shadow of his brothers' achievements will not suffice to ensure his future.

Tamaki:
Hey Kyoya, I just had the most brilliant idea!

Kyoya:
How did I wind up here?

Child:
Mama, hurry up!
It's right over here!

Mother:
All right, all right.

Kyoya:
I was sleeping comfortably in my own bed just a few minutes ago.
No, wait...
Tamaki was carrying on about some sort of exhibit.
He had his heart set on all of us going, I think.

Tamaki:
Doesn't this sound fascinating?
Commoners hold events like these all the time.
They're called expos.
That's commoner lingo for exposition.
Products from all over are gathered under one roof so that underprivileged people can cope with the emptiness of not being able to travel.
If that makes this the perfect opportunity for us to better understand Haruhi by allowing the host club to study commoners in their natural environment.
You guessed it, Kyoya.
We're going to go.
On a field trip.
Haruhi won't be joining us today incidentally as her presence might harm our credibility as impartial observers.
Oh, come on.
You can't just lie here in bed all morning.
Today is the last day of summer vacation.

Kayoy:
For your information, I was up until 5 am, you morons.
Which, if you hadn't noticed, makes me a little less than happy about being woken up.

Honey:
Kyo-chan isn't much of a morning person, huh?

Mori:
You have no room to talk.

Honey:
Hey, what does that mean?

Kyoya:
Okay, I'm enough with the commoner shtick.
If you formulaic halfwits feel like wasting all afternoon on worn-out old cliches, go right ahead and suit yourselves.

Tamaki:
Well, if that's what you really want...
You heard the man.
Now let's dress him to the nines and head for the expo!

Hikaru:
Hey, everyone!
Look at that!

Kaoru:
Wow, all of those suits look exactly the same.

HIkaru and Kaoru:
Mass production! Mass production!

Tamaki:
There's something here called a pet shop.
That will be our very first destination, men.

Honey:
They serve ice cream on the roof top!

Tamaki:
Really?
Wait, wait, wait.
They're holding some super special event there too!
Sweet!

Honey:
Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!

Kyoya:
Oh, right.
That's how.
Looks like I'm at the Izumi shopping center, which isn't exactly within walking distance of home.
Guess I'll call to have a car sent out.

Child:
Yay!
Oh wow, sorry.
Mama!

Kyoya:
Tamaki is a dead man when I get my hands on him.

Haruhi:
Kyoya senpai?
I didn't expect to see you here today.

Kyoya:
How much money do you have on you, Haruhi?

Haruhi:
What?


"Kyoya’s Reluctant Day Out!"


Haruhi:
Kyoya senpai, are you sure this is where you want to eat?
There are much nicer restaurants to choose from upstairs.

Kyoya:
Well, you don't have much on you, so our choices are limited.
Just be sure to get a receipt.
Tamaki will reimburse you ten fold.

Haruhi:
How did this happen?
All I wanted was a little peek at the products expo.
Why did I have to run into Kyoya senpai?
And why did he have to be in such a foul mood

Kyoya:
Haruhi, I think it's our turn.
How do I order?

Haruhi:
Here, why don't I order for both of us?
Do you know what you want?

Kyoya:
You, pick.
Just get us a lot of it.

Haruhi:
Okay, that and that one, both with fries too, please.

Clerk:
Oh, he's so cute and just my type.
Okay, coming right up.
Would you be interested in adding one of delicious desserts?

Kyoya:
Thank you.
No, I don't care for sweets.

Clerk:
Gorgeous and cool.
I think I'm in love.
Before you decide, we have a new shake that's absolutely...

Kyoya:
I have given you my answer.

haruhi:
Please be sure to include our receipt.

Haruhi:
Kyoya senpai, just because you're in a bad mood today, doesn't give you the right to go around talking to people like that.
The poor girl was just doing her job.

Kyoya:
Her job is to serve us a food, not to irritate me with some weak sales pitch.
Now what?

Haruhi:
Nothing.
I just don't think I've ever actually seen you eat before.
Somehow I thought your experience would be more refine.
I'm surprised food like this even appeals to you.

Kyoya:
It doesn't appeal to me in the slightest.
No doubt you'll say I'm callous for admitting it, since you bought this tripe.

Haruhi:
Of course, I won't.
I will think it, though.

Kyoya:
There is an understanding between makers of food like this and those that eat it.
Quality takes a back seat to convenience.
Refinement isn't part of the equation.
It's meant to be eaten quickly.
Besides no one of consequence is here to witness my momentarily [lacks/lapse] of manners.

Haruhi:
He must be taking a break from the whole nice guy act today.
I guess even rich people have to let their hair down every once in a while.

Kyoya:
Hey, for the record, I'm saying it benefits me nothing to keep up appearances in a place like this.
And that includes any special treatment I may give you here.

Haruhi:
Oh, really?
I never would've guessed that in a million years.

Girl:
Oh my gosh, girls.
That guy in the glasses is so total hottie.

Girls:
You're right.
He's gorgeous.

Girl:
Um, excuse me, I'm so sorry to interrupt.
I was wondering if you're not using this chair, can my friends and I borrow it?

Kyoya:
Why not?

Girl:
Thank you so much.
That's awesome.

Kyoya:
You're quite welcome.

Haruhi:
I've never seen this side of Kyoya senpai before.
Is he always this indifferent if there's nothing for him to gain?

Kyoya:
Welcome.
Won't you come in?

Haruhi:
Tamaki senpai couldn't act this way if his life depended on it.
How do they compliment each other so well?

Kyoya:
You're probably wondering how Tamaki and I compliment each other so well?

Haruhi:
Oh great.
Now he's inside my head.
What is he, telepathic or something?

Kyoya:
The answer is simple.
I have something to gain.
There is no better motivator than self-interest.
I have to look out for number one, you know.

Haruhi:
Tamaki senpai would be heart-broken, if he heard you say that.

Kyoya:
On the contrary.
He's understood our arrangement from the very beginning.
The same goes for all of them.
Hikaru, Kaoru, Honey senpai, Mori senpai,
The glue that holds the host club together is our mutual egocentricity.
It's the principle that drives the alliance between our families and ensures each of our futures.
Though, well let's just say there's still quite a bit you don't understand about that.
Altough Tamaki is a fool and self sacrifice does come naturally to him.
So I guess the point of this is we are very different creatures.

Haruhi:
Senpai, I thought you were gonna take a taxi home.

Kyoya:
I am, but I might as well have a look around first.
Black pearls from Ishigaki Island.
Odd to find them here, considering how much they go for.

Haruhi:
You're kidding.
Really that's incredible.
How can you tell, senpai?

Kyoya:
I am the product of excellent breeding.

Haruhi:
Breeding, huh?
Well, that would account for the wall of ice he's putting up between us.
So, Kyoya senpai, why is it after all this time I still know next to nothing about your family?

Kyoya:
Because there's really nothing for you to know about my family, at least nothing that should be of interest to you.

Haruhi:
Well, that seems to be a little bit unfair, don't you think?

Kyoya:
Just what do you mean unfair?

Haruhi:
I mean, when it comes to my personal life, you even keep tabs on who my father's friends from work are.
I barely have a clue about yours.
So, I call that unfair.

Kyoya:
That's a very intriguing notion in its own way.

Haruhi:
You've got two older brothers, right?
For starters, you could tell me something about them.
What kind of people are they?

Kyoya's father:
Please allow me to introduce my sons.
They are the Otori legacy.

Woman:
Ah, what fine young men they are.

Man:
Truly a credit to their line.
You must be very pleased.
They all appear to be remarkably brilliant.
Of course only the oldest will succeed his father.

Woman:
Kyoya is the most handsome of the three, but you're right.
With two older brothers ahead of him, he doesn't stand a chance of becoming family's patriarch.

Kyoya:
They are rather exceptional, enough so that my father puts a lot of stock in them.
Though, as the third son, things work out a little differently for me.

Kyoya's father:
An irreproachable academic record, and social finesse are accomplishments your brothers lay claim to long ago.
So, your only achievements will have to outshine these considerably in order to impress me, Kyoya.

Kyoya:
I didn't realize there's so much pressure on you to succeed.

Kyoya:
Pressure?
Oh no, Haruhi.
I can't think of nothing more fun than this.

Woman:
Dear me!
Pieces from the Komatsu Shoin collection?
I never thought that I would find them here.

Man:
Why madam, you have an astonishing eye.

Haruhi:
Um... senpai?


Haruhi:
Um... senpai?

Man:
You know, they have such exquisite color, don't they?
To tell you the truth, I'm not really even supposed to have these out on display.
The bulk of the Komatu collection has been privately held for ages.
Pieces rarely come out for sale.

Kyoya:
With all due respect, these are fake.

Man:
Hey! Get out of here, kid!
What do you think you're doing?!

The shade of blue is strongly reminiscent of Shoin's work.
But looking closely around the base, you'll notice the color graduation isn't quite dark enough to be authentic that and the lacquer is too clear.

Man:
That's enough of you, Mr. expert.
I'll report you for obstructing my business.

Kyoya:
Just as I thought.
The brush strokes on this seal are uncharacteristically broad as well.
For you sake, I hope you have a certificate.
That is if you still insist it's real.

Man:
Of course, it's real.
I have the certificate at home.

Kyoya:
Ah, then surely you won't mind if I call the Komatsu family right now to verify your claim.
My own family has had dealings with them for generations.
It would only be a matter of minutes.

Man:
Wait, you can't do this.
This is an outrage. I've been here for years. I'll report you to the authorities.

Haruhi:
After everything you told me, senpai, stepping in on a complete stranger's behalf seem to be a little out of character for you.

Kyoya:
Oh that?
Well now she is hardly a stranger.
You mean you don't know?
Her husband is the CEO of a major electronics company.
This is my first time to meet her personally, but that ring on her left hand is unmistakable.
My family has dealings with her husband's company.

Woman:
Ah, one of the Otori boys, imagine running into you here, incognito.
The next opportunity I have, I'll be sure to take advantage of one of your family's beautiful health resorts.

Kyoya:
We'd be honored.

Haruhi:
Big surprise.
Kyoya senpai is Kyoya senpai, after all.
No, hang on a second.
That woman's ring.
There is no way he could've...

Kyoya:
Hey, Haruhi, did you know this?

Haruhi:
Did I know what?

Kyoya:
Is melon the preferred flavor among snack makers?

Haruhi:
Huh?

Kyoya:
It doesn't make sense.
If the primary ingredient is corn, why go to the trouble artificially making it taste like fruit?
Seems counterintuitive.

Haruhi:
That's an intriguing notion in its own way.

Kyoya:
Oh, was I being funny?

Haruhi:
Earlier you were going on and on about how you and Tamaki senpai are nothing alike, but what you just said about the candy, it sounds exactly like him.

Kyoya:
You thinks so?
This does seem like something he and the twins would fawn over.
Very well, I'll buy them.
Haruhi, your wallet.

Haruhi:
Oh yeah, I forget.
Just be sure to save me a receipt.

Tamaki:
No, you're too heavy.

Honey:
Hey, Tama-chan, the show is about to start!

Renge:
Hey, kiddos!
I hope you're ready.
It's back to school time.
Have all of you, boys and girls been keeping up with your summer homework assignments?
Oh, what's that?
Oh, you haven't.
What have you been doing all this time?
Stop goofing around and get a move on.

Tamaki:
What is Renge doing up there?

Hikaru:
It seems like recently...

Kaoru:
she's practically been around every corner.

Namahage:
What do we have here?
A bunch of naughty little children, who are little ready for school?
It's too late now.
I, Doctor Namahage, will never let you leave.

Renge:
This is a job for the Ouran Host Club Rangers!

Host black:
Unhand her!

Namahage:
Oh no.
It's my arch nemesis Dragon shadow leader of the Host Rangers.

Host black:
Host black!

Honey:
Um what happened to Kyo-chan?

Haruhi:
Hey, senpai.
Why do you think that Tamaki senpai is always so eager to help people when they're in need?

Kyoya:
You mean, when there's nothing to be gained from it?
Who knows?

Haruhi:
So then, when you help someone, how exactly do you benefit from it?
Money or reputation?
Or is it more abstract?
Because the way I see it, Tamaki senpai gets something out of helping others and doesn't necessarily involve their paying him back.
So maybe when you get right down to it, the two of you aren't all that different.

Tamaki:
Kyoya, would you please find a map of all the public schools in this area?
I'd like to help this man find his daughter.
Besides, that young lady looked like she wanted nothing more than to play the piano with you.
It's an absolute tragedy to see a brother and sister at odds this way.
We have to do something to help them.
If you really want to surpass your brothers, then you can do it.
But I think you're the one who's lost hope and given up.
Hey Kyoya, I just had the most brilliant idea!
We should start a club together!

Announcement:
Attention, shoppers.
This is an announcement for a lost child.
Attention, shoppers.
This is an announcement for a lost child.
A little boy named Kyoya Otori is lost inside the store.
Repeat.
Kyoya Otori is lost.
His guardian, Suou, is waiting for him at the 2nd floor information counter.
Kyoya is 5 feet 11 inches tall, with black-hair and wearing prescription glasses.

Woman:
Is that him?

Man:
Matches the description.

Woman:
He's a little big to be lost, don't you think?

Child:
Hey mister, is there something wrong with you?

Kyoya:
That damn idiot, I'll kill him!

Tamaki:
Kyoya, there you are!
We were so worried.
Why is Haruhi with you?

Honey:
Oh boy, Oh boy, Haru-chan has come to play with us.

Hikaru and Kaoru:
Hooray! Play! Play! Play! Play!

Haruhi:
I'm sorry, guys, but I'm exhausted.
It has been a very long day for me.

Tamaki:
Stop it!
Quit licking me!
That tickles!

Kyoya:
What's with the dog?

Tamaki:
Isn't she beautiful?
I got her at this amazing place they call a pet shop.
Hey, cut it out, Antoinette!

Kyoya:
How exactly am I like this moron?

Haruhi:
I know you want me to believe your only reasons for helping that woman earlier were selfish ones.
But that isn't actually the truth.
Because from where we were standing, there's no way you could have seen her ring.
There was a flag blocking our view.
It just doesn't make sense.
You go to all that trouble acting like you're such a big jerk when being a nice guy comes so naturally to you.
It seems counterintuitive.

Kyoya:
That's a very intriguing notion in its own way.


Haruhi:
Hey, what's going on? Who is that kid?

Tamaki:
Oh this will be good.

Honey:
You have to do better than that, Chika-chan.

Haruhi:
Next time, "Chika’s “Down with Honey” Declaration!"

Tamaki:
The ouran host club will be waiting for you.

Host club members:
We'll see you then.