France:
So Britain, I have something important to say to you. I would like...for you to marry me.
---
Britain:
That's very funny, France. I don't believe it's April Fools Day yet.
What's the matter, old chap? You can't even afford to buy a calendar anymore? Ahahahaha!
France:
You are wrong, mon ami, and this is not so funny.
Britain:
Right, what the hell is wrong with you!?
France:
Here. Take this.
Britain:
That's a marriage registration form, you idiot!
France:
No, it's not. Can't you see, it is a calendar....
It's for you! It is a calendar!
Britain:
What's gotten over you!? Unhand me, you fobbish twit!
France:
Just sign it!
Britain:
I will do no such thing!
France:
I said sign it!
Britain:
No! Stop it! NO! I don't know what you're up to, but I don't like it!
France:
Look, I don't want any part of this, either, but we don't have much of a choice! Come on! Blame the Suez Canal! That thing has put me close to bankruptcy! If I don't get married to you right away, I overheard my boss saying that he would kill me! That would suck!
Boss:
I WILL KILL YOU!
Britain:
That's still not a satisfactory reason to be wed! Have at you! Here's what I think of your damn form!
France:
No! What are you doing!?
Britain:
Now, you see? That's what happens when you try to force people to marry you, frog! Hahahahaha!!
France:
You brute! Devil! Don't you even care if I die!? Please, I'm begging you! You have to listen! I can become Britain's coined little French village if you want me to! Come on, help me!
Britain:
I will not, fool! Why on earth would I ever want to marry you!? First of all, you need to learn to deal with and accept your failures--aagh!
France:
Ho ho ho ho ho....
Britain:
Unhand me this instant, you --- madlubber! Release me! Let me go! Turn me loose! Why you not listening to me, France? Lessen that grasp! I said let go this minute! This is rather objectified!
MERGER OF ENGLAND AND FRANCE
While there was a growing sense of the crisis due to the Suez Crisis in 1956, then French Prime Minister Guy Mollet suggested to England that England and France merge, saying that they would agree to have Queen Elizabeth be the united sovereign. Even after being summarily turned down, he requested for France to join the Commonwealth of Nations.
Well, if you think about it, that'd be...impossible.
France:
No. I will be fine. You will see. Just you watch me. I'll be fine, just fine. Oh ho ho ho ho ho....
Hetalia.
---
Germany:
Count off!
Italy:
Uno!
Japan:
Ni!
Germany:
And I'm drei! Now for the secret training! First scenario! What would you two do if you came across Britain and you were unarmed? Well, spit it out, ja! What would you do!?
Italy:
Uh...I know! I'll make a white flag with a stick and a handkerchief and wave it around really fast! And then I'll cry loudly and ask for help!
Germany:
Dum kampf! If you do that, you will lose! Japan! Correct answer!
Japan:
Hai. You should impersonate William the 1st's wail.
One hour later.
Two hours later.
Japan:
This is fun. Training sure is helpful, hai?
Italy:
It sure is! Now I know exactly what to do if I ever run into Britain!
Germany:
Zur gut! Now let us continue! Britain wants you to acknowledge his bastard child as your own. What do you do?
Britain:
Hahaha...stupid Germany. I'm SAS. When it comes to spying, no one is better than Britain. Cheers. That was all too easy. Now I shall observe your top-secret training.
Germany:
What do you do? Britain is slowly closing in on you...but he's dressed up for carnival and swishing his hips!
Britain:
Oh!!
Hetalia!
---
Italy:
Hello! Good morning, Japan!
Japan:
No, please! I don't understand what's happening...you invade my personal space! Not that I need --- to begin with!
I do hope you realize how awkward that whole thing was for me.
Hetalia.
So Britain, I have something important to say to you. I would like...for you to marry me.
---
Britain:
That's very funny, France. I don't believe it's April Fools Day yet.
What's the matter, old chap? You can't even afford to buy a calendar anymore? Ahahahaha!
France:
You are wrong, mon ami, and this is not so funny.
Britain:
Right, what the hell is wrong with you!?
France:
Here. Take this.
Britain:
That's a marriage registration form, you idiot!
France:
No, it's not. Can't you see, it is a calendar....
It's for you! It is a calendar!
Britain:
What's gotten over you!? Unhand me, you fobbish twit!
France:
Just sign it!
Britain:
I will do no such thing!
France:
I said sign it!
Britain:
No! Stop it! NO! I don't know what you're up to, but I don't like it!
France:
Look, I don't want any part of this, either, but we don't have much of a choice! Come on! Blame the Suez Canal! That thing has put me close to bankruptcy! If I don't get married to you right away, I overheard my boss saying that he would kill me! That would suck!
Boss:
I WILL KILL YOU!
Britain:
That's still not a satisfactory reason to be wed! Have at you! Here's what I think of your damn form!
France:
No! What are you doing!?
Britain:
Now, you see? That's what happens when you try to force people to marry you, frog! Hahahahaha!!
France:
You brute! Devil! Don't you even care if I die!? Please, I'm begging you! You have to listen! I can become Britain's coined little French village if you want me to! Come on, help me!
Britain:
I will not, fool! Why on earth would I ever want to marry you!? First of all, you need to learn to deal with and accept your failures--aagh!
France:
Ho ho ho ho ho....
Britain:
Unhand me this instant, you --- madlubber! Release me! Let me go! Turn me loose! Why you not listening to me, France? Lessen that grasp! I said let go this minute! This is rather objectified!
MERGER OF ENGLAND AND FRANCE
While there was a growing sense of the crisis due to the Suez Crisis in 1956, then French Prime Minister Guy Mollet suggested to England that England and France merge, saying that they would agree to have Queen Elizabeth be the united sovereign. Even after being summarily turned down, he requested for France to join the Commonwealth of Nations.
Well, if you think about it, that'd be...impossible.
France:
No. I will be fine. You will see. Just you watch me. I'll be fine, just fine. Oh ho ho ho ho ho....
Hetalia.
---
Germany:
Count off!
Italy:
Uno!
Japan:
Ni!
Germany:
And I'm drei! Now for the secret training! First scenario! What would you two do if you came across Britain and you were unarmed? Well, spit it out, ja! What would you do!?
Italy:
Uh...I know! I'll make a white flag with a stick and a handkerchief and wave it around really fast! And then I'll cry loudly and ask for help!
Germany:
Dum kampf! If you do that, you will lose! Japan! Correct answer!
Japan:
Hai. You should impersonate William the 1st's wail.
One hour later.
Two hours later.
Japan:
This is fun. Training sure is helpful, hai?
Italy:
It sure is! Now I know exactly what to do if I ever run into Britain!
Germany:
Zur gut! Now let us continue! Britain wants you to acknowledge his bastard child as your own. What do you do?
Britain:
Hahaha...stupid Germany. I'm SAS. When it comes to spying, no one is better than Britain. Cheers. That was all too easy. Now I shall observe your top-secret training.
Germany:
What do you do? Britain is slowly closing in on you...but he's dressed up for carnival and swishing his hips!
Britain:
Oh!!
Hetalia!
---
Italy:
Hello! Good morning, Japan!
Japan:
No, please! I don't understand what's happening...you invade my personal space! Not that I need --- to begin with!
I do hope you realize how awkward that whole thing was for me.
Hetalia.
---
NEWS FLASH
"This scratch...could it be...from that time?"
America's Storage Room Cleaning
Coming soon!