Deuces Wild

by Jerry Boyd

This book is a work of fiction. All the people, events, and organizations in this book are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to anything in the real world is purely coincidental.

Copyright©2024 Jerry Boyd

Cover image and design by May Dawney Designs 2024

All rights reserved.

This book may not be reproduced, stored, or transmitted, whole or in part, by any means whatsoever without prior written consent of the author and publisher.

Dedicated to my long suffering wife, Donna, and my beta readers, Mary, Bernard, Mary Ellen, Clarke, Jeff, John, Jon, Cheryl and Stephen.

A long overdue shoutout to Geezette, who gave me my first review, on Bob’s Saucer Repair, and is still a loyal fan. Without her encouragement, I might not have hung on long enough for the books to catch on.

Thanks to Thomas P. Metcalf for suggesting intelligent birds.

If you want some BSR merchandise, we’ve got a shop on Redbubble, at

https://www.redbubble.com/people/BobSaucerRepair/shop

We have Frisbees and other goodies at Zazzle.

https://www.zazzle.com/bob+and+nikki+gifts

If you should want to get ahold of me for something, I'm on Facebook as Jerry’s Books

Just a note for long-time readers, the character list has been moved to the end of the book.

A note about commas, and editing. My beta readers work hard to keep me on the straight and narrow. Anything wrong is probably due to my hard-headedness in not taking their advice. Extra commas you may find scattered through the dialogue, are a blatant attempt at mind control. It’s my way of making the characters sound the same way in your head, that they do in mine.

My understanding of current U.S. Navy usage of the term ‘Commodore’ is as a title, not a rank, used for a Captain in direct command of more than one vessel. In the book, you will find characters moving back and forth between the two titles, depending on the circumstances of the moment. My beta readers felt that it was confusing, I hope this clears up any issues.

An issue was pointed out to me by a reader, Joshua Ahles. The Gene Cernan had originally been (in Lost in Transit), derelict for forty thousand years. In Shaved Ape Key, and Monkey Business, I had shortened that to ten thousand years. Those two books are now corrected, but I wanted to head off any confusion. The proper timeline is that the Commonwealth Navy was mothballed about fifty thousand years ago, and the Gene was found and refitted as a colony ship about ten thousand years after that. Shortly after the Gene was found, the Squirrels did the damage at the Navy yard that Bob and the crew found in Monkey Business. Sorry for any confusion I caused by not keeping up with my own story.

Books in Sequence

1. Bob's Saucer Repair

2. Whammo Ranch

3. Shady Oaks

4. Starfoot

5. Charlie's Planet

6. Lost in Transit

7. Captain Caveman

8. Shaved Ape Key

9. Secret Squirrel

10. Monkey Business

11. Let's Make a Deal

12. Saucer Holler

13. Roo the Day

14. Deadbot

15. Admiral Bob

16. Hoopee Do

17. Take Me Home

18. Home is Where the Heat Is

19. Wreckers

20. Home Again

21. Baycation

22. Gene’s Regret

23. Can You Take a Juke?

24. Don’t Give Up the Shop

25. Hand Jive

26. Fort Scratchy

27. Trifecta

28. The Boatmen

29. Slow-Mo

30. Mr. Wilson’s Neighborhood

31. Unfriendly Relations

32. Dog Days

33. No Good Deed

34. Shipping Out

35. Joy to the Squirrels

36. Hannah Comes Home

37. Bob Has a Tantrum

38. Sheriff Bob

39. Cleanup on Aisle Squatch

40. The Butler Did It

41. Kid Stuff

42. A Reptile Dysfunction

43. Baby Ruth

44. There’s No Space Like Home

45. Thus Shook Zarathrustra

46. Friends With Boomafits

47. Gone Fishing

48. Steamed Punks

49. Nikki’s Day Out

50. Chicken Train

51. Wise Guys

52. Deuces Wild

Snitz licked my ear. I got up and got ready for my day. Ryder handed me a cup of coffee on my way out of the house. We patrolled the yard, but Snitz didn’t find anything he particularly objected to. Ryder must have been reporting to someone on the Gene, because my comm didn’t ring until I was seated on the porch. I got it out and answered. “Bob Wilson.”

“Boss, it’s Saucy. We’ve been holding the Chinese Ambassador’s calls. Do you want us to let him through, now that you’re awake?”

“I might as well get it over with, I suppose. Put him through, Saucy.”

“Here you go, Boss.”

What sounded like a young female voice said, “Please hold for the Ambassador.”

I replied, “Nope. He can call back when he’s ready to talk.”

I hung up. The comm rang again, and I looked at the caller ID. It was Saucy, so I answered. He said, “Are you sure that was what you wanted to do, Boss? He’s been on hold most of the night.”

“Well, Saucy, I don’t think that letting him get the idea that he’s going to be able to have me wait around on him is the right way to start this negotiation, do you?”

“I suppose not, Boss. Do you think he will call back soon?”

“I’m not sure, Saucy. I would have to think that he went off to bed, and left that poor girl to deal with me until he got up. I wouldn’t expect to hear from him for an hour or so.”

“Do you want me to put you down for an hour in the pool then, Boss?”

“You know I don’t participate in those pools of yours, Saucy. If you want to put your money on an hour, there’s not much I can do about that, is there?”

“Me, take advantage of inside information? Surely not, Boss.”

“You’re not convincing me, and don’t call me Shirley.”

“Understood, Boss. Saucy out.”

“Wilson out.”

I put the comm away, and Snitz tapped on my foot, “Trouble?”

I said, “Not really. Just somebody who thinks he can push us around. I’m going to have to explain things to him.”

He tapped, “Sounds like trouble to me.”

“Could be.”

It was calm, until Milly and Nunya came outside, cradling their coffee cups. I said, “Morning, ladies.”

Nunya said, “Morning, Uncle Bob.”

Milly said, “Morning, Tio.”

“Is there something I can do for you two?”

Milly said, “Nope. We were just wondering why you had to run to the Gene last night.”

“Well, hopefully we took care of those people who were trying to give us trouble. At the very least, we cut down their numbers.”

Nunya asked, “You went up to oversee the raids?”

“We did. Turned out the folks we had left in charge had things pretty well set up. All we had to do was give a couple of orders, to get things underway.”

Milly said, “That doesn’t sound right, Tio. What were they stuck on, that you had to show them how to get around?”

“They didn’t want to send a false signal to see which of their suspects was the one we needed to deal with.”

“So you told them to send the false signal to all of them, and nab the one who reacted?”

“Exactly. How did you know?”

“One of the things I’ve been studying at the Academy is a class in ‘How to Think Like the Boss’. I’ve learned a few things.”

Nunya said, “There isn’t a course like that.”

Milly said, “Hush. I almost made him believe it.”

“I don’t know about that. It’s hard to fool the Boss.”

Before I could say anything in my own defense, my comm rang. I looked at the caller ID, and saw that it was a DC number. I let it ring a few times, and then answered. “Bob Wilson.”

“Mr. Wilson, this is the Ambassador to the US from The People’s Republic of China. I need to speak with you about some people you have taken prisoner.”

“You mean those fentanyl traffickers we took off the playing field last night? I don’t think we have anything to talk about concerning them. They came after me, and I explained to them how that was a bad idea. Problem solved.”

“You don’t seem to understand, Sir. They are citizens of the PRC. We will not stand by and see them abducted, without retaliation.”

“Your government has tried to attack my company in the past. I’m sure you’re aware just how well that went.”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You actually believe that story about all those nukes being launched as a training exercise? Those were live missiles, aimed right where I’m sitting, and not a one of them got through. I have to wonder what you think you have that will get through, when your nukes, the big card in your hand, are useless.”

“You mean you are not willing to negotiate the release of the hostages you have taken?”

“I object to the use of the word ‘hostages’. They have been detained for their participation in criminal enterprises. I don’t see any reason to turn them loose to do it again.”

“What do you intend to do with them, then?”

“Oh, I’m not sure about that. It probably depends on whether we can prove any of them are murderers, or not. Admittedly, the crimes involved didn’t take place in my jurisdiction, but a case can be made for BSR being the de facto authority over all Earth, since we removed the Commonwealth protectorate status. In any case, I don’t see where your government has anywhere near the combat power to keep us from doing as we please with those fine specimens.”

“You are ignoring our demands?”

“Ignoring? No, I don’t think so. Laughing heartily, and pointing at you making fools of yourselves might be closer to the truth. If I were ignoring it, I wouldn’t be wasting my time talking to you, would I?”

“You consider negotiation a waste of time?”

“When the party involved has no way to affect my prosperity, either for good or ill? I don’t see what else I could regard it as.”

“You will hear from my government, Mr. Wilson.”

“I’m sure I will. Are they going to be as boring as you?”

The line went dead. I called Johnny. “Hey, Boss. What can I do for you?”

“I just wanted to let you know that I just whizzed off the Chinese Ambassador. I expect they will be sending nukes my way shortly, if they have any left.”

“We’ll keep an eye out. What would you like done with them, when we catch them?”

“Just dump them in the sun. No need to mess around about it.”

“Understood. Did you need anything else?”

“Nope. Wilson out.”

“Johnny out.”

I put the comm away. Nunya asked, “Do you really think they will fire a nuke at us, just for catching a few of their people who were doing bad things to begin with?”

“I don’t know. It wouldn’t surprise me, after some of the things I’ve seen, but it also wouldn’t surprise me if they had come up with a new way to give us trouble.”

We didn’t have to wait long to see what they had come up with. A flight of four fighters dropped stealth in front of the house. They were pivoting madly, firing their lasers. We saw flares in the distance, where their shots were connecting with something, but they were far enough away that I wasn’t able to tell what they were shooting. George said, “Boss, they have a swarm of drones coming in. The fighters think they can get them all. Ringo and I are ready to back them up, if they don’t.”

“Do you mind if us puny organics draw our weapons, just in case?”

“Not at all, Boss.”

I looked at the two girls, and they already had their pistols out. I followed suit, and we waited. I had worried too much, or so I thought. The fighters had no problem taking care of the drone swarm. I was about to relax and put my weapon away, when Snitz stood up, and barked at the corner of the house. I drew down, and then he turned and barked the other way. I said, “Cover that side, girls.”

Milly said, “On it, Boss.”

The infiltrators came around the corners of the house, with their weapons up. I fired a stunner blast, and took the first one down. By the time they were all stunned, I was beginning to think about changing power packs. Nunya called, “That’s all of ours.”

I said, “Stay alert. There may be a few holding back, hoping we let down our guard.”

George said, “This was a large attack, Boss. The Marines took down a bunch more, out back.”

I replied, “Get those fighters to scan the whiz out of the area. I want to be sure we’ve gotten them all.”

“On it, Boss.”

Marines came up to disarm the people we had stunned, and give them nighty-nights. The Sergeant asked, “Anything special you want done with these folks, Boss?”

“Take them out to Bill Rottum. Wouldn’t want him to think we don’t have anything for him to do.”

“Will do, Boss. The ship should be here shortly.”

“Good work.”

A ship came in, and the Marines began loading the folks that we had stunned. George was right about it being a large attack. I had wondered why they needed such a big freighter, at first, and then I saw how many folks they had to haul off. No wonder some of them had gotten by the Marines. Another ship came in, and bots began picking up the remnants of the drones. It wasn’t long before everything was back like it was before the attack. I decided to call the Ambassador.

I dialed his number, and got the lady again. She said she would get him, but I managed to get her to listen, before she ran off. I said, “That won’t be necessary. The Ambassador doesn’t have anything to say that I want to hear, anyway. Just tell him that his little display was mildly amusing, and I look forward to what he sends next.”

“Thank you for your call, Admiral. I will pass the message along.”

“Have a good day.”

I put my comm away, and asked, “George, would you be kind enough to make sure that young lady doesn’t have any trouble today? I doubt the Ambassador is going to be very receptive to what she has to tell him.”

“I’ll get some people on it, Boss.”

“Thanks.”

Milly asked, “You think you got her in trouble, just for asking her to pass the message along?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if I did, Miles. People in organizations like the Chinese Communist Party don’t like to hear bad news.”

“Who does? You’re saying that they would hurt her, just because the news she brought wasn’t what they wanted to hear?”

“I am.”

George said, “They tried, anyway. The fighters broke open the bulletproof glass, and the Marines are recovering her, as we speak.”

“That was fast, George. I would have expected them to wait until after work, so they could make it look like a mugging gone wrong, or something like that.”

“Apparently the Ambassador has a short fuse.”

“That may come in handy.”

“I suppose it could. What do you want done with the lady we rescued?”

“Ask her if she’s willing to defect to the US. I don’t think we want someone who used to work for those folks in the company.”

“Understood, Boss.”

Nunya asked, “You don’t think she would be good help?”

“She was raised in a society that doesn’t believe in individual effort. I don’t think we have time to educate her otherwise.”

“I guess I see what you mean, but I’ve never seen you reject anyone without an interview, before.”

“Maybe I’ve seen that fail enough times to know better.”

Milly said, “Maybe you’re on shore leave, and don’t want to get that involved in work, right now.”

“That could be, too.”

Ryder came to the door. “Breakfast is ready.”

We went in and ate. Then we did the dishes, over Ryder’s protests. I was just drying my hands when my comm rang. I answered, “Bob Wilson.”

The voice on the other end asked, “Admiral, could you please hold for the President?”

“Of course.”

It wasn’t long until I heard the President on the line. He said, “Good morning, Admiral.”

“I doubt that, Mr. President. If it was, you wouldn’t have a reason to call me.”

“You’re right. Things do seem to go better when we manage to ignore one another, don’t they?”

“That’s been my observation, anyway. I wouldn’t be willing to guess how it looks to you.”

“I have the same opinion, Admiral. I also have the Chinese Ambassador, who is mad as a wet hen about the way you’ve been treating him and his people.”

“Let’s see. We picked up a few folks who we had found out were trafficking fentanyl into the States, and then we managed to take the team he sent to punish us for those captives as well. I suppose I can see where he might be a little miffed, but I would think he wouldn’t want to sully his reputation sticking up for folks who were so flagrantly in the wrong.”

“I’m afraid that’s not the way he sees it.”

“I can imagine. I did, however, go to more than a little bit of trouble to get the Earth out from under the Commonwealth, so that I could import modern tech to help folks out. Are you going to tell me that your economic projections aren’t looking better now that you have all those people coming out of retirement, and going back into the work force?”

“No, I couldn’t say that. I can however, say that not every country on Earth has been enjoying those benefits to the extent that the US has.”

“That’s true. There are some countries where I don’t think my people would be safe, trying to help out, and so, I haven’t tried to do much for them. I’ve yet to figure out the magic sauce to get people to get along, so I’m not sure what you would like me to do about that.”

“You have enough combat power to convince even the most recalcitrant nation to do things the way you want them done, Admiral.”

“That’s a fact, Mr. President. If I were to use my combat power in that way, however, it would make me de facto Emperor of Earth. That’s not a job I want.”

“As that would imply that I was working for you, I’d rather not see that, either.”

“At least we can see eye to eye on that much. What would you suggest I do to make the Chinese happy?”

“I don’t know that you can, Admiral. I’m sure neither one of us want you to turn loose those fentanyl importers. I’m sure someone will step up to take their place soon enough, but we’ll have a short period of less death and destruction. As for the people they sent to attack you, I would think they would come under the heading of prisoners of war, wouldn’t they?”

“Well, they were in service of a sovereign power, and they attacked us on our own soil, so I can see where you’re going with that. There is the small matter of them not being in uniform at the time of the attack, but I suppose we could overlook that, if it were to lead to a peaceful solution.”

“That sounds promising. I don’t think he’s going to want to let the traffickers face BSR justice, though.”

“I can see how that wouldn’t be the outcome he’s looking for. Perhaps they should have considered that possibility before they decided to come after me.”

“It sounds as if you’re taking this personally, Admiral.”

“That would be because they were making attacks on my person, Mr. President.”

“I can see how that would bring things into focus. Let me see if I have your position correct. You would be willing to negotiate for the people who made the attack in the Holler as prisoners of war, but the gangsters you’ve caught are going to face BSR justice, and there isn’t anything to be done about that?”

“I believe you have the gist of it, Mr. President. You are planning to act as an arbiter in this matter, then?”

“If you will accept me as such.”

“I don’t have a problem with it. I don’t like talking with the Ambassador directly. He doesn’t seem to have too much respect for me, or BSR.”

“I can see how that would be a problem. Some of my predecessors had that attitude.”

“It worked so well for them, too.”

“We have finally managed to get the landscaping around the White House back to the state it was in. The groundskeeper has pleaded with me not to upset you, Admiral.”

“Sounds like wise counsel, Mr. President.”

“I understand. I will do my best to be an honest broker in this matter.”

“That’s all I can ask for. Have a good day, Mr. President.”

“You as well, Admiral.”

I put away the comm, and Nikki asked, “What was that all about, Caveman?”

“The Chinese Ambassador has his panties in a wad about all of his people we had to collect last night, to get rid of those fentanyl traffickers who were targeting us.”

“He has the President doing his dirty work?”

“So it would seem. I’ve yet to see how well that will work out.”

Milly said, “It would nearly have to be better than talking to him directly. You didn’t seem like you were enjoying that at all.”

“No, I wasn’t. He doesn’t seem to be willing to accept that we hold all the cards, and he gets to do business only as long as we decide to let him.”

Janet said, “That would be a hard thing for someone accustomed to power to accept.”

“I suppose it would.”

Nikki asked, “Was that the voice of experience, Janet?”

“I was thinking about the people in my village, before you all came down for the big meal, and how they were planning to take over the Gene. They thought they would be able to overpower all of you, just because they were used to fighting the animals. Somehow it never sunk in that you had come in and defeated those animals in an afternoon, and they had been at it for years, and never come close to that.”

Nikki replied, “I thought it might be something like that. Do you have any advice for your dad?”

“Nothing besides ‘watch your back’, and he does that as a habit.”

I said, “I was hoping for something that would let me get into their way of thinking.”

“I don’t have anything like that, Dad.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“I’m sorry to have to tell you that. I’d like to be able to help.”

Nikki said, “Well, the fighters and Marines have upped their coverage. I think we’re probably about as safe as we can hope to be.”

I looked at her, curious. She said, “I’ve been handling the security, so that you could relax a little bit.”

“Thanks.”

Gus asked, “What are we going to do today?”

Nikki replied, “You don’t have any ideas?”

“Not really.”

She said, “I think it might be better if we didn’t leave the Holler today, don’t you, Caveman?”

“I see where you’re coming from, Space Cadet, but I’m not sure I agree.”

“Why not, Caveman?”

“Most of their people in the area have to have been caught already. It seems to me that we ought to smoke out the rest, while they’re off balance, so that they don’t have any established network, when they send in the new folks.”

“Wait, you want us to act as bait, to draw out whoever they’ve got left?”

“You know the Marines are going to have us covered ridiculously well, don’t you?”

“I do. I also know that nobody is perfect. One of these days, somebody is going to get past those Marines you put so much faith in.”

“That’s why we’ve trained so hard to take care of business ourselves. Even if they were able to capture one of us, the rest of the Marines in the fleet would be on our trackers so quick that they wouldn’t know what hit them.”

“You don’t think the Ambassador would issue a kill order on us?”

“I don’t think he would enjoy the aftermath, that’s for sure. Four sets of carrier mains pounding the crap out of China wouldn’t take long to get their attention.”

Janet asked, “I have a question, Dad.”

“Go ahead. Do you have a better way to handle it?”

“I don’t know. I’m just wondering about something. It could be helpful, if I have the right idea.”

“Okay then. What are you thinking?”

“From what I’ve learned about China, for all their projection of being a single outfit, controlled from the top, they seem to be a bunch of little managers out for themselves, until they get big enough to get noticed from the top, and then they suddenly turn up missing.”

“I’m not hearing a question yet.”

“Well, couldn’t it be that the Ambassador has overstepped his authority with the fentanyl, and his superiors might be willing to deal with him for you?”

“I doubt that he was doing anything that his superiors didn’t want done, in regards to the fentanyl. They seem to want to do whatever they can to weaken the US. It could be that his superiors would be interested to learn that he is in the process of whizzing off BSR, though.”

Nikki asked, “I see that gleam in your eye, Caveman. What are you thinking?”

“Well, the President mentioned something about how his groundskeeper had begged him to stay on good terms with BSR. I’m thinking the government buildings in Bejing could use a little kinetic landscaping. Maybe that would get the point across that we’re not people to be trifled with.”

“Okay, Caveman, that does sound like a good idea, but shouldn’t you get Sue and her people on tracking communication out of China, so that we can pin down where the next attack on the Holler is coming from? Maybe even catch them before they get here?”

“That’s a good thought. Are you catching all this, George?”

“I am, Boss. The Skipper is on his way up from the shop.”

“Tell him to come on in, when he gets here. No need to knock.”

“Will do, Boss.”

It wasn’t long until Topper came in, and found us. He said, “I thought you were supposed to be goofing off, Boss, not fixing problems.”

“I did too, Skipper. The problems seem to have other ideas.”

“You’re saying that our shepherd doesn’t want you to get lazy?”

“That would seem to be the case. Do you think Tex would be up for a little target practice?”

“I think that would make his day. What did you have in mind, Boss?”

“Well, Sue needs to make sure where the head fellow over in China is spending his time. He’s looking a little chubby lately. I would think a swimming pool might help with that, wouldn’t you?”

“Why yes, Boss. I’m guessing you want it nice and handy to the building?”

“Yes, indeed. One round, full power. Explain to him that we mean business.”

“Tex will be ecstatic, Boss. He loves getting to use full power.”

“I try to please, Skipper.”

Nikki asked, “Do you think you should give the man a call, and explain why he’s getting a new swimming pool, Caveman?”

“I’m sure he’ll get in touch with me, as soon as it’s installed.”

Topper said, “That’s for sure, but it might make more of an impact if you were on the phone with him, when it hit.”

“You’re getting the hang of organic relations, Skipper. Thanks for all your hard work.”

“All part of the job, Boss.”

“Do you think Sue and Saucy can get me a direct line to this guy?”

“I’m sure they can. Does he speak English?”

“I’m not sure.”

Janet hit her watch. “It says here that he does speak a little, but he’s not great at it.”

I replied, “Well, then. That will put him at a disadvantage. I think that’s where we want him, isn’t it?”

Topper said, “Exactly, Boss. Tex has the shot lined up. Saucy can put him on your communicator whenever you want.”

I took it out, and said, “Tell him to go ahead, then.”

There was an answer, in Chinese, and I said, “Mr. Chairman, I’m afraid I don’t speak your language. I do think I’m about to deliver a message that you can understand, though. Your Ambassador has directed his people to take actions against BSR. I will not tolerate such actions.”

“Who is this? How did you get this number?”

“I am Admiral Bob Wilson. If you think your computer systems are any challenge for my people, you should think again. There is a token of my displeasure inbound on your location. I don’t think it will be possible for you to misinterpret it.”

“What are you babbling about?”

“As I said, your Ambassador to the US has ordered his people to attack Saucer Holler. I am not willing to tolerate that. I am, however, willing to pound you as far back as it takes, to get you to call him off. Am I clear?”

“I understand your hollow threats. I don’t see any reason to give them any weight.”

Topper held up his hand in my line of vision. He held up all eight fingers keeping all four of his thumbs folded down. He dropped one for seven. He continued counting down. I said, “Your proof should be arriving shortly.”

“Big talk, Yankee.”

Topper dropped the last finger, and the call cut off. I said, “Hmm...we seem to have gotten disconnected. That’s too bad. His lack of a grasp of reality was almost fun.”

I put the comm away, and looked at Topper. He said, “Yes, Boss. We already have a heightened watch going for nuclear launches.”

“Thanks, Skipper. Anything else you think we ought to worry about?”

“Sue is tracing out all the calls that are coming into the States from China. She thinks she will have a target package for Andre momentarily.”

“I like working with such competent people.”

“What would you like us to do with this bunch?”

“We can’t keep dumping them on Bill. He’s got enough to play with right now. How about we take their weapons and equipment, and leave them someplace in Russia. That should make getting home challenging. Be sure and send their IDs to the US government, in case they care.”

“You don’t think they will care that they have been penetrated by Chinese assets?”

“The way they’ve been acting lately, I’m not sure, one way or another.”

“Fair enough.”

Topper froze for a second, and then said, “That was quick. The Chinese government has issued a cover story about sewer gas detonating.”

“I assume you’re doing what needs to be done to make fun of that?”

“Yes, Boss. Lakki is having fun with them. She’s making fun of their story, and putting the real one out to all the outlets that will run it. Sky News had some trouble, though.”

“Why is that?”

“None of their anchors could keep from laughing long enough to read the story.”

“That would be a problem. What did they do?”

“Lakki sent them a direct feed. She read it for them.”

“Pity she didn’t think to get Ellie to do it.”

“I think that comes under the heading of ‘too much fun’, Boss.”

“You could be right about that, Skipper.”

Nikki piped up, “No, Ellie wasn’t able to keep a straight face, either. They’re working on it, they may send a recording down later.”

I just shook my head. I asked, “Was Sue able to find many Chinese assets in the States?”

“Not really. Either they are saving them for a better opportunity, or we’ve already dealt with most of them. The ones she was able to figure out, Andre has on the way to Russia.”

“That sounds wonderful. The Marines are keeping an eye out for any of them that seem particularly talkative, aren’t they?”

“You think we might be able to get some useful information out of them, Boss?”

“I doubt it, but it would be a shame to pass up on an opportunity, and miss out on something that would help us.”

“Andre says he already had a watch on for anyone who acted like they might be helpful. So far, he hasn’t found anyone, though.”

“Good enough.”

Topper asked, “Did you need anything else, Boss?”

“I can’t think of anything at the moment.”

“Do you know of anyone who needs some automotive work?”

“Brook’s Toyota looks like it could be freshened up, without hurting anyone’s feelings.”

“We wouldn’t be able to mess with it much, would we?”

“I wouldn’t think so. Is that going to be a problem?”

“Not really. We’re all tired of band practice.”

“About time for a good, old fashioned callout, to spice things up, huh?”

“We could do worse, Boss.”

“That we could.”

Nikki said, “You know, as well as any of the rest of us, that the fleet has things like that covered, so that we don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

I replied, “I do. That doesn’t keep us from being nostalgic about the old days.”

Topper said, “Yeah, like he said.”

Nikki replied, “You really don’t expect me to get the fleet to send us a callout, just for old times sake, do you?”

Topper knelt, and put his hands together. “Please, Ma’am?”

“Get up. I’ll see what they have.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.”

She fiddled with her watch, and said, “Oh crap! There is one! We need to be in the air ASAP!

I jumped up, and said, “Everyone who doesn’t want to get left behind, get to the Evans.”

Topper said, “The band is on the way, Boss. They’re bringing some rescue tools that Eve doesn’t have.”

“Good work.”

We all ran for the Evans. By the time the last of us was up the ramp, Nikki was already lifting us out. She came over the speaker, and said, “Caveman, Nunya, get into the heavy duty vacuum gear. It’s the only thing we have aboard that will work for a diving suit.”

The band helped us get dressed. I asked, “Do we have some way to give these people we’re going after some air?”

Taz handed me a tank, and said, “Here you go, Boss, but I don’t know how you will get it to them, if their car is sealed up.”

“I don’t know either, but we’ll figure something out. What do we have to float the car?”

Ruth came out with an armload of rescue bubbles. “They’re not exactly the right thing, but I think they will work for long enough to get a cable on the car, and raise it with the Evans.”

“Good enough. Don’t run the boom out too far. The car is probably going to be waterlogged, and that will make it heavy.”

Topper said, “Understood, Boss. I’m thinking you and Nunya can work on helping the people, and the rest of us can try to get the car headed for the surface.”

“Sounds like a plan, Skipper. How far out are we?”

He pointed at the ramp coming down. Everyone but Ruth ran for the ramp. She headed to the controls for the winch. Nunya sent me a message telling me how to use the gravity plates in the suit to descend faster. I turned them on, and jumped off the ramp. I’m not sure what I expected, but being pulled down through the water at speed was definitely a new experience. The water was murky enough that we couldn’t see much. Luckily, the suit was able to use its external speakers to fake up a sonar, and tell us where we needed to go. Once I had bottomed out, I was able to turn down the grav plates, and walk on the bottom. I walked toward where the sonar was telling me the car was. When I got there, I found two people inside, in an air bubble that seemed to be shrinking entirely too fast. I went to the part of the car where there was water on the other side of the window, and cut a small hole with the suit’s welding attachment. Then I ran the hose from the air tank into the car, and cracked open the valve. The stream of bubbles from the tank seemed to calm the people inside down quite a bit. Ozzie had found where their air was getting out, and patched it with mounting putty, so that their air bubble was getting bigger fast. Topper and Taz rigged the rescue bubbles to give us some buoyancy, and then rigged a harness for the crane. The movement of the car got the folks inside wound up again, but between Nunya and me, we were able to get them to calm down. Ruth began to take up slack on the cable. I got the folks’ attention, and did my best to tell them that they were about to be headed back to the surface. I’m not sure they understood, but they both smiled when they felt the car begin to rise. The water was deep enough that we needed to make a couple of stops on the way up, to make sure that they didn’t get the bends. I was glad the suit I had on was able to run at normal pressure, at least no deeper than we had to go. Nikki used the pauses to drag us closer to the shore. When we finally broke the surface, she took us the rest of the way in. Sunshine seemed to have a miraculous effect on the two passengers’ state of mind. Nikki put the car down on the beach, and Ozzie opened the door. The girl inside said, “Thank you so much! We thought we were done for!”

I replied, “Glad we could help. How did you come to be so far out in the lake?”

The boy said, “I’m not sure. The car pulled hard to the right, and went through the guardrail before I could get it back under control.”

Ozzie picked up the front of the car, once they were out. Taz went under to look at it. He said, “Tie rod broke, Boss. The right wheel jammed all the way toward the rail. His story makes sense.”

I replied, “Thanks, Taz.”

He got out from under, and Ozzie put the car down. Topper asked, “Do you think we ought to fix the railing where they went over, Boss?”

“Might be a good idea, Skipper. No telling how long it would take the State to get a crew out here.”

They took off toward the site of the crash. The boy from the car asked, “What will they be able to do? That rail looks pretty torn up, from here.”

I said, “Topper wouldn’t have asked, if he didn’t think he could do some good. I’m not sure what they have in mind, though.”

Ozzie tried to pull the railing back into shape while standing on the bridge, but he couldn’t get enough traction to do any good. They wound up hand in hand, with Topper holding on to the other edge of the bridge, so that Ozzie could use his strength to pull the railing back where it belonged. When they got it lined back up, all three of them started welding it back together. It wasn’t long at all before they came running back. Taz said, “This heap ain’t going anywhere, Boss. Do you think we could fix it up for him?”

“I don’t see why not. You might want to hit it with the pressure washer before you take it aboard. Eve wouldn’t be happy if you brought this mess into her cargo bay.”

Topper said, “No, she would not.”

I turned to the people we had rescued, and said, “You would probably be more comfortable aboard the ship. These boys aren’t going to be gentle about washing your car.”

They headed that way, and I followed them. Janet had hot chocolate waiting for them. Nunya said, “We have a shower and a washing machine, if you would like to get cleaned up.”

The girl took her up on it right away. Milly handed the boy a blanket. She said, “This will keep you warm until your turn in the shower.”

“Thanks.”

The bots finished cleaning up the car, and Ruth winched it into the cargo bay. The boy asked, “What will happen to my car?”

I replied, “The band has been looking for a project. They should have it in pretty good shape in a day or two.”

“I don’t think I could pay for something like that.”

“One thing’s for sure, you can’t drive it the way it is.”

“No, I don’t guess so. Is there some way I could pay in installments?”

“We’ll work something out. Don’t worry about it right now.”

It wasn’t long before we landed back at the shop, and the band took his car off the ship to start working on it. Topper came over, and asked, “Just get it back on the road and safe, right Boss?”

“Sounds right to me. He’s already trying to figure out how he’s going to pay us for that much. We don’t want to give him a stroke or something.”

“That wouldn’t do at all.”

The girl came out, looking fresh, with her clothes clean. She said, “Your turn, Dakota.”

“Thanks.” Milly showed him where to go. Janet brought out another cup of hot chocolate, and the girl said, “You folks really don’t have to go to so much trouble for us. Saving our lives is enough for one day. She noticed the car was gone. “What happened to Dakota’s car? He loves that heap.”

I replied, “The band is going to go over it for him. Where do you two need to go?”

She started rattling off an address. I said, “Janet, take her forward, and help your mother figure out where she’s talking about.”

Janet said, “Come this way.”, and they headed for the cockpit. Nunya said, “Well, that was different than anything I’ve done before.”

I replied, “Me too. I’m surprised we were able to get to them in time.”

Eve said, “The fleet has good satellite coverage of the planet these days, Boss. We’re keeping an eye out for things like that.”

“How many accidents do we get with cars in the water?”

“Not many. It just happened that the unit that usually covers this area was busy somewhere else. It was a good thing that Mrs. Wilson checked in when she did.”

“Just lucky, I guess.”

I felt the ship settle, and the ramp started down. Somehow, I wasn’t surprised when it got far enough down to show me a fellow in work clothes, holding a shotgun. He wasn’t pointing at anyone, so I figured we had a chance to be peaceable. He asked, “What do you want?”

I replied, “Well, we found a car on the bottom of a lake. We managed to get there soon enough to rescue the kids inside. I’m guessing one of them is your daughter, since she was the one helping my wife figure out where to land.”

“How did they wind up in the lake?”

“Tie rod broke on that heap he was driving. Wheel snapped around, and launched them right over the side.”

“That would do it. I’ve told that boy he needs to take better care of that thing.”

“The band has it back at the shop. They’re going to go over it, so at least it will be safe, until he manages to ignore it too long again.”

“That sounds good. How does he figure to pay for such as that?”

“I haven’t worked it out with him yet. He seemed to think he could make payments. I’m guessing he’s not got much of a job.”

“No, he doesn’t. He helps out around here from time to time, and does some odd jobs for other folks, but he doesn’t have anything you would call steady. He does treat Lisa well, though. I’m hoping to figure out a way to get him going on a career, so that they can have a life together.”

“Sounds like a fine plan. Do you have anything figured out for him, yet?”

“Nothing that doesn’t cost more than I can shake loose.”

Lisa came walking back from the cockpit. She said, “Hi, Dad. Still threatening people with that old shotgun?”

“I’m not threatening anybody.”

I said, “That’s true. He just has it handy, in case I was to get uppity.”

Her dad said, “There don’t seem to be much danger of that, Mister. You seem like a nice enough guy.”

“Do me a favor, and convince my wife, while you’re here.”

“Oh, I’m friendly and all, but that would take hazardous duty pay, I’m thinking.”

Nikki wasn’t far behind Lisa, and she said, “Is he trying to convince you that I’m a mean old woman?”

“I didn’t hear anything like that, Ma’am. He just didn’t seem to think you had a very high opinion of him.”

“He does alright, most days. We got your daughter home safe, does that count for anything?”

“It sure does. What about that lazy field hand? Have you got him on there somewhere?”

I said, “The last I saw, he was going to clean up, before we got here. I would have thought he would have been done, by now.”

“No telling, with that boy.”

I replied, “I’ll go see what’s keeping him.”

I went up to the cabin, where Milly had sent him to clean up. I found him sitting on the bed, apparently freaking out. I asked, “Are you okay?”

I didn’t get a response. I tried to get him to get up and come with me, but he wasn’t cooperating. I went back out to the cargo bay, and said, “The whole thing seems to have hit him, all of a sudden. I think we need to give him a minute to settle out, and try again.”

Lisa said, “That’s not it, Sir. He’s epileptic. He needs his meds.”

Her dad asked, “He hasn’t been taking them?”

“He ran out, and he thought he could do without, and save for a ring for me. I told him it was more important for him to have his meds, but he wouldn’t listen.”

“Okay, I need to get with our medic, and see what we have on board that will bring him back.”

Lisa’s dad asked, “You carry medical supplies?”

“We’ve got an autodoc, but I don’t want to have to dump him in there, without asking him first. He was already wound enough about the band fixing up his car. I’d hate to see the fuss he’d raise about being in the box.”

I whipped out my comm, and called John. He answered, “Morning, Bob. What kind of mischief are you going to get us into this morning?”

“I’ve got an epileptic kid who tried to make it without his meds. What should I do to get him back?”

“You must have a reason for not just throwing him in the box and getting it over with. Is it a good reason?”

“Not that good, I suppose. You’re saying just do it, and don’t worry about getting him back from the seizure first?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying. You’re decent at this stuff, but I’d be worried even if I was there. The box can fix him right up, no sweat.”

“Okay, John. I’ll get right on that. Wilson out.”

“Branham out.”

I said, “George, go get that kid, and get him to medbay. Captain Branham says the box is the best thing for him.”

He faded in, and said, “On it, Boss. You’ll need to come and set it, though.”

“Right behind you.”

Lisa’s dad said, “Neat trick he’s got, staying hid like that.”

I replied, “Makes his job easier. He’s supposed to keep me sucking wind. Nobody else wants my job.”

“What job is that?”

Lisa said, “Da-ad! Don’t you recognize him? That’s Admiral Wilson.”

“Admiral?”

“Don’t worry about it. I don’t have my work clothes on today. I’m just Bob.”

Lisa’s dad said, “Either way, it’s something to have the Admiral himself come and save the day.”

I replied, “I’d better get that box set, so we can get Dakota back.”

I went to medbay. George was trying to get him in the box, but he was still bent as if he was sitting on the bed, and he didn’t seem to want to straighten out.”

George asked, “What do you think, Boss?”

“I dunno. Stun him, and see what that does.”

Sure enough, that relaxed him, and we were able to close the lid. The box gave me lights I hadn’t seen before, but it seemed to know what needed to happen. I let it do what it wanted to, and hit the start button. The progress bar wasn’t even willing to give an estimate, yet. I went back out to the cargo bay. Nikki asked, “Did you get him started?”

“I did. The machine isn’t willing to guess how long it’s going to take, yet.”

Lisa asked, “Is he going to be alright?”

“I have to think so. The machine says it can heal him up, and I’ve yet to see it fail, when it thinks it can get the job done. The only thing we don’t know yet is just how long it might take.”

Her dad asked, “Can you bring him back here, when he’s better?”

“Sure can. His car should be ready by the time he is.”

“Sounds like a plan there, Admiral.”

“I told you once, I’m not working today.”

“Rescuing kids out of the bottom of a lake is what you do for fun, then?”

Nikki said, “Well, his flag captain was talking about how we hadn’t been out on a rescue in so long, and Bob here was agreeing with him, so I looked to see if there was something that needed to be seen to that we could handle. It just happened to be these two.”

“You know, Ma’am, I wouldn’t want to play poker with you. You looked like you believed that.”

I said, “It’s the way it happened, believe it or don’t. Serves me right for fussing about being bored.”

“Are you sure you don’t need anything for bringing my little girl home?”

“I can’t think of a thing that I need. Things are going pretty well for me.”

“Alright, then. See you when Dakota wakes up.”

“You sure will.”

Nikki and I got back aboard, and I ran the ramp up. She went forward to take us home. Milly asked, “Feel better, Tio?”

“I suppose I do. I never expected to have a rescue Jones.”

“There are worse things to be hooked on, Tio.”

“There sure are.”

It wasn’t long before we were back in the Holler.  I went to medbay to check on Dakota. The autodoc seemed to be steadying out, and it wanted about a day to get him squared away. I was turning to go when John stepped into the room. He asked, “What’s your prognosis, Dr. Wilson?”

“I just came to see if it had a time estimate yet, John. You don’t have to be like that. I just let it run the defaults, I didn’t try to get in your area.”

“I know. I was following along remotely. I was just giving you a little crap. You do need some down time, don’t you?”

“Apparently. I did have a rather disturbing symptom this morning.”

“Oh?”

“I appear to have a rescue Jones. I felt better for a while after we got those kids out of the water.”

“You think that’s a bad thing?”

“I think it could be. I’d hate to start looking for problems, just so I got to deal with them.”

“That’s been your job for a while now, Bob. I can’t see how you wouldn’t still be in that mode of thought when you’re on leave.”

“Ain’t that what leave is for, John?”

“It is. That doesn’t mean that you’re going to be able to do it right away. I knew a guy who cooked fast food for a few years. When he finally got a different job, he missed the constant pressure, and the adrenaline rush. He thought he was weird for it, and eventually he was able to calm down. I thought at the time it was just that he had gotten used to living that way, and needed time to get used to the calm.”

“If I’m understanding what you’re saying, I’m hooked on finding new things, and it’s going to take a while for me to settle down.”

“If you’re going to settle down, it’s going to take a while, yeah. You can’t expect to switch gears as soon as you hit dirt. I’m not sure even a bot like Topper can do that.”

“I don’t think he can. He came to to talk to me this morning about an old fashioned callout. Nikki searched and found this one, just to feed both of our Jones.”

“That was nice of her, and probably the best cure for what ails you.”

“You don’t think we need to worry about the Admiral losing it?”

“You sound as squared away as you’ve ever been, Bob.”

“That’s not saying much, is it?”

“You wouldn’t want me to lie to you, would you?”

“I guess not.”

“What are you up to today?”

“We really hadn’t come up with anything, yet. I was still trying to decide if it was safe to show my face in town, or not.”

“You think the Chinese have more agents?”

“Sue has been working hard to find everyone they have, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have sleepers they could activate. I just don’t want to put anyone else in danger because of me. That old man getting shot because I wasn’t alert enough to see those two in the restaurant before they started their run at me bugs me. We got him in the autodoc quick enough, but there’s no guarantee that will happen every time. Somebody might die, next time someone takes a shot at me.”

“You can’t let yourself think that way, Bob. You’ll wind up hidden away in a fortress, just to keep from being a danger to the ones around you. Life is dangerous. Always has been. Are you going to tell me that you don’t have the best security around looking out for you?”

“You know I can’t say that. The Marines are great. Especially George and Ringo.”

“Okay then. Trust them to do their job. You know yourself, you can’t assume somebody is out to get you, just because they’re armed. The Marines have a tough job, and they’re doing the best they can. You’ve trained as hard as you can to make sure anything that gets through them is still going to have a tough time. Scotti and Ruth even remade all your clothes to be bullet-resistant. You’ve done everything you can think of, and so has Sally. It’s not perfect, and it’s not going to be, but that doesn’t give you an excuse for failing to enjoy life.”

“That’s quite the speech, Doctor. I get the feeling that you’re building up to a pitch. I’m assuming if you’re that strong behind it, it’s a good idea. I trust your judgment, John. If there’s something you think I should do, let’s just go do it, and save the con job for the next bunch of aliens we meet.”

“You haven’t changed much, Bob. Why did you let me run so long?”

“It was kinda nice to hear. I guess I needed a reality check.”

“I’m thinking with all the stuff we get up to, our reality check bounced a long time ago.”

“Ain’t that the truth? What is it that you think I ought to do today?”

“I was thinking maybe we needed to go play Frisbee golf again.”

“That always works out so well, John. Have we ever tried that without getting called out for something?”

“Not that I recall. Today might be the first time, you know? Besides, I’ve heard tell that you have a rescue Jones, so what are you worried about anyway?”

“Like I said before, I trust your judgment, Doc. Let’s head in. At the very least, the Marines get some target practice.”

“You’re beginning to sound like one of those, what do they call them? Optimists?”

“You don’t have to get nasty about it, John.”

Nikki saw us heading for John’s Wagoneer. She said, “Bring him back happy, John. He’s really having a hard time unwinding this trip.”

John replied, “I’ll do what I can. No guarantees.”

“Good enough, I guess.”

We headed for town. John asked, “Why do you think you’re having a hard time slowing down, Bob?”

“I think it’s more about the future of the fleet than it is anything specific to this trip. It’s beginning to be obvious that we’ve found most of the species that live in the neighborhood. None of them have anything we really need, and nothing we have appeals to them particularly, except for walnuts and the Squirrels. Sally has scandium mines set up, so that we don’t have to go deal with the Roos if we want more. I’m just not seeing what the next thing is. If we let the fleet sit in port, we’re just begging for bad things to happen. The kind of people we’ve recruited don’t do well without a job to do. The fleet needs a purpose, and I don’t know what to give them. I’m in the big chair because I’m supposed to be able to tell what we need to do next, and I don’t have a clue.”

“Well, Bob, you’ve been clueless before, and we’ve always made it through. What makes this time any different?”

“Always before we had a specific goal or objective that we were trying to accomplish. This is too nebulous. I don’t know how to ask for help, when I don’t even know what I’m asking.”

“I see what you mean. There isn’t any way to ask for help to solve a problem you can’t even define, is there?”

“Not that I see. I know we have enough brainpower in the fleet to figure out what we need to do, if I was smart enough to ask them.”

“Well, I’m no better off than you are, Bob. I don’t know what to ask, either.”

We got to Shady. We went in to the desk, and saw Rena. She said, “Bobby Apples! Good to see you! Are you guys going out back again?”

“We were thinking about it. Is that a problem?”

“Well, we’ve instituted a greens fee, don’t you know?”

“How much is that?”

“Five minutes of shooting the bull with your old friend, before she turns you loose to go play.”

“That I think I can afford. How’s married life, Rena?”

“All that I hoped it would be. How are things with your family?”

“How is it usually? More fun than a barrel of monkeys, and getting bigger all the time.”

“Did you find another stray to adopt?”

“Ahh, nope.”

“You dog! Don’t you ever leave that woman alone?”

“She keeps getting stunned, and taking out her implant.”

John said, “Yes, I have people looking into it. It’s a known fault, in some quarters. They just didn’t bother to tell the rest of us. Just be aware that you need to get yours checked, if you happen to get stunned.”

“I caught a little bit the last time you guys were here. Do you think that was enough to worry about?”

“I don’t know enough about it to say. If I were you, I’d have somebody look at it, just to be sure.”

I said, “Name it after me.”

Rena replied, “I doubt that. I wouldn’t name a kid Apples.”

John laughed, “She got you good, Bob. You’ve been in the black too long.”

I replied, “I think you may be right about that.”

We headed toward the back, through the length of the building. There were a few folks who recognized us, and several who didn’t. I saw someone who looked familiar, but I couldn’t place. I bumped John, and asked, “Doesn’t that lady look familiar?”

“She does, but I can’t place her. I don’t think I’ve had much dealings with her.”

“Me either, but she sticks in my mind for some reason.”

I walked over to her, and asked, “I’m sorry to bother you, Ma’am. My friend and I both get the feeling we ought to remember you, but we just can’t place you. Could we bother you to help us out?”

“I suppose I owe you that much. The last time you asked, I wasn’t much help. I’m Oleta Books. I used to work over at the Historical Society. I believe you boys came in looking for some information about Ezra Johnson, and all I could do was send you over here to see Delilah Mayfield.”

I replied, “You did more than that, Ma’am. That was a good tip, about the Russell Stover.”

“She liked ‘em, did she?”

“That she did.”

John asked, “Just why is it that you’re staying here these days, Ma’am?”

She held up her hands. “Arthur came to visit. My hands are bad enough I can’t take care of myself, and I have a lot of trouble getting around. It finally got to the place that the assisted living I was staying at said that I was going to have to move out, because they couldn’t take care of me anymore. I’d heard good things about this place, the last couple of years, and I thought it was probably my best bet.”

I said, “Let me make a call. I’d bet there’s someone who would like to see you.”

“I doubt it. I never had any kids, and my Jack is long gone.”

“Let’s find out, what do you say?”

“Knock yourself out, I’ve got nothing better to do.”

I got my comm out, and called Dee. “What now, Bob? Are we bugging out?”

“Nope. If it was that, I would have called your old man, and let him tell you. I know better than to give you bad news.”

“What then?”

“Well, I think you’ve got a debt, and a chance to repay it. Get your buns up here to Shady. There’s someone here you need to talk to.”

“Who might that be, Bob?”

“Oleta Books. She’s the one who told us where to find you, way back when.”

“She’s sitting in Shady? I know it’s better than it used to be, but why haven’t we recruited her, yet?”

“I was hoping you could tell me that.”

“I don’t know, I’ve been out in the black. I haven’t had time to look at who’s living there, and who isn’t.”

“Are you busy today?”

“I am now. I’ll be there in an hour or so.”

“John and I will be out back, if you need us.”

“I shouldn’t, but thanks.”

“Fly safe.”

“You too.”

I put the comm away, and turned back to Mrs. Books. She asked, “What was all that about?”

“Somebody coming to see you. She said she would be here in about an hour. You’ll know she’s coming when you hear the tires squealing.”

“Ain’t but one woman you could be talking about. Nobody’s heard much of anything out of Delilah since you two broke her out of this joint, back when it wasn’t fit to live in. You’re telling me that she’s coming here to see me?”

“I am, and you can believe it or not, as you see fit.”

“I’ll remember you said that.”

“I don’t have any doubt about your memory, Ma’am.”

“What would Delilah want with me?”

“I think she might figure she owes you a favor.”

“How’s that?”

“I’ll let her explain it, when she gets here.”

“Be that way.”

“I don’t know any other way to be, Ma’am.”

“At least you’re consistent. I see you’re wearing a ring. You mean to tell me there’s a woman patient enough to put up with you?”

“I expect to wake up every morning and find her wised up and gone, but she hasn’t left yet.”

“I think I’d like to meet the woman who could keep up with you.”

“I think you did, the last time I saw you.”

“That cute little thing who was riding with you two? She married you? Poor thing.”

John said, “We all tried to talk her out of it. It was a tragedy.”

They laughed. John said, “It’s been fun talking with you, Ma’am. Maybe we’ll get another chance soon.”

“If you say so. You boys have fun.”

“You too, Ma’am.”

“Not much chance of that.”

We walked on down the hall. I looked at John. “How did she slip through the cracks? I would have thought somebody would have known to keep an eye out for her?”

“I would have, too. Maybe Dee can tell us, when she gets here.”

We got to the course, and got a couple of disks out of the shed. We were getting ready to start our third game, when we saw Dee pushing Oleta out the back door in her wheelchair. We went over to see what they were up to. Dee said, “I know, Bob. I should have had a watch list of my old friends set up, so we would know if any of them moved in.”

“I never said a word, Dee.”

“I can hear you thinking, and you’re right. Poor Oleta here has gone through a lot of crap that she didn’t need to, and the only reason is that I wasn’t paying as much attention as I should have been.”

“Well, you know about it now. I doubt it’s going to happen again. Did you come out to wait for a clinic ship?”

“Sure did. They were busy with another pickup. Shouldn’t be over another five minutes, though.”

Oleta spoke up. “You two are a little sneaky, aren’t you?”

I replied, “Well, that all depends on who you’re comparing us to. Next to Dee’s husband, we don’t amount to much.”

She looked up at Dee. Dee said, “I think you’d better wait to meet him until you’ve had a turn in the box.”

“Maybe so, if he’s worse than these two.”

“He might be sneakier, but these two have other talents to make up for it. Bob there is a heck of a leader, even if he doesn’t look like much. John has yet to meet a disease that he couldn’t beat. Good folks to know.”

“I’m beginning to get that impression. I was just sitting there, trying to get up the courage to try and knit, and these two show up and change everything around for me.”

“Get used to it. They do that wherever they go.”

“You’d think the government would get after them, if they cause that much trouble.”

John said, “Bob talked them out of a treaty, so we don’t have to worry about that anymore.”

“A treaty, you say?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“So you really are ‘that’ Bob Wilson?”

“The one from the videos, you mean?”

“The one they talked about so much on the news, a while back?”

“Yep. That’s me. Admiral Bob, the head of the fleet.”

“Why would you go and name all your ships BS this and that? Wouldn’t you want people to take you seriously?”

I pointed at John. “You’d have to ask him about that. He started it before I knew anything about it. Thought it was funny.”

She looked at John. He replied, “Guilty as charged, Ma’am. I did start the whole thing. I didn’t expect him to run with it, when he found out about it, though.”

“You did know him before. Are you weak in the head?”

“Apparently, Ma’am.”

I looked at Dee. “She’ll fit right in. Pity Thump doesn’t have a brother. I think she might need a little more than an ordinary man to keep up with her.”

Oleta looked up at Dee. “Thump?”

“Somebody else you need to wait to meet, until you’re feeling better.”

“Sounds like I’m going to be at this a while.”

“Oh, no. Bob will have a cookout, and you’ll be able to meet everyone in one night. You won’t have a chance of remembering them all, but that’s a problem for another day.”

“What have I gotten myself into?”

“I’m not sure about that, but it’s more fun than you’ve had before, I’d be willing to bet.”

“We’ll see about that.”

Her ride settled onto the gravel. The ramp came down, and the medbot asked, “Is this the patient?”

Dee replied, “Yes, she is. May I ride with you?”

“Of course, Ma’am. You wanted her delivered to the Armstrong, correct?”

“Yes.”

Dee pushed Oleta up the ramp. John said, “See you later, Dee. Do we need to take the Chevelle home for you?”

“No, I can get somebody to deliver me back here, when we get Oleta in the box.”

I said, “Fly safe, you two.”

“You stay out of trouble, Bob.”

“You ask a lot.”

The ramp closed before she could answer. We went back to our Frisbee. After a couple more games, John said, “You know, Bob, I’m getting a little hungry.”

“I am, too. We should probably do something about that, don’t you think?”

“That would seem like the thing to do.”

We put the disks away, and went by the desk to tell Rena that we were leaving. Someone we didn’t know was sitting in Rena’s place. She looked down at something, and then looked back at us. By the time we got even with the desk, she had gone through that cycle three or four times. When we got there, she asked, “Are you Mr. Branham, and Mr. Wilson?”

John said, “We are. Is there something we can do for you?”

“No, Rena just said you might be coming through before she got back from lunch, and not to worry that you were on the premises without being in the book.”

I asked, “She was nice enough to leave you pictures so that you could be sure it was us?”

She blushed. “You saw that, huh?”

“Afraid so. I won’t tell if you don’t.”

“Deal. Anything you’d like me to pass on to Rena?”

“I can’t think of anything other than we’re sorry we missed her.”

“I’ll be sure and tell her. Nice meeting you fellows.”

“Nice meeting you, too. I guess I didn’t catch your name.”

“Silly me. I didn’t throw it. I knew who you were, so I forgot I needed to introduce myself. I’m Claire Rollins.”

We both shook her hand, and John said, “Have a good one, Claire. We’re going to go eat. I’m not sure if we’ll be back this afternoon, or not.”

“Okay, Mr. Branham. You have a good one, too.”

We went out to the Wagoneer. John said, “Pity we don’t have Snitz to tell us where the bomb is.”

I said, “George, have a look, would you?”

His voice came out of thin air, saying, “Already did, Boss. No explosive vapor, no sign of tampering, and no emissions from a tracker. If someone has messed with this vehicle, you need to try and hire them, to teach us better procedures.”

I replied, “Understood. Thanks.”

We got to Julie’s, and she met us out front. “What do you two miscreants think you’re doing?”

John said, “We thought we were getting fed. Were we mistaken?”

“No, you weren’t, Silly. C’mon in. Do you need the back room?”

I said, “Not unless there’s already somebody else here. We don’t know of anyone else planning to be here, I don’t think.”

John replied, “No, I don’t know of anybody.”

Julie put us in the booth we used to sit in, back before we met Nikki. John said, “This brings back memories, doesn’t it?”

“It surely does. We’ve traveled a lot of light-years since those days.”

“I remember this side used to have a broken spring. I always used to sit over here, because it felt better on my bad hip.”

I asked, “Seeing Mrs. Books stirred up a bunch of memories, didn’t it?”

“That’s the truth. How did we get here, from there?”

“One step at a time, Old Buddy. Same as we do anything.”

“Seems like a lot of steps, though.”

“That it does.”

Julie came over and sat down. She asked, “What are you two so deep in thought about?”

I replied, “We met somebody we hadn’t seen in a long time, and it got us thinking about how all this started. Just reminiscing, I guess.”

“You mean, thinking about the times before you conned me into buying this place?”

John said, “You sound like you think he shouldn’t have done that.”

“I was trying to wind him up, John. See how you are?”

“I’ve been trying to get him to relax all morning. I didn’t want you tearing up my hard work.”

“Okay, I guess I see what you mean. Whassamata, Bob?”

“My head is still in the black, even though my butt is in Missouri.”

“Having trouble letting it go?”

“Always do, but this time seems a little tougher. Not sure why.”

“What have you done to get your mind off it?”

“Oh, we took the kids some different places, stuff like that. Went and fished a couple of teenagers out of a lake this morning, that was fun.”

“Why was it fun interrupting some kids’ day swimming?”

I replied, “I think it was the part where they took their old Chevy swimming with them.”

“They drove off a bridge, and you got there quick enough to get them out before they ran out of air?”

“Just lucky Nikki checked the net at the right time.”

“I guess. How did they wind up in the water?”

“The boy was trying to keep his car on the road without doing the repairs it needed. A tie rod broke, and he lost control.”

“Let me guess, the band is going through it like a Top Fuel crew between rounds.”

“Right on the first guess. I’m just hoping we can find him a better way to make a living, so that he can afford to keep up with maintenance.”

“What’s he been doing?”

“Odd jobs, from the sound of things.”

“Why’s that?”

“Epilepsy, from what we’ve found out so far.”

“When does he get out of the box?”

John said, “She knows you, Bob.”

“She sure does. What did the timer say, when you looked, Doc?”

“It said he would be ready to rock in the morning.”

Julie said, “I could use a handyman around here. Is he local?”

I fiddled with my watch. “Looks like the place he’s staying is about twenty miles from here.”

“Do you suppose you could have him come by here, once he’s awake?”

“All I can do is ask, Julie. I can’t guarantee you a thing.”

“Fair enough, Bob. What do you want to eat, John? I’m figuring the head idiot wants his open faced roast beef.”

I replied, “That does sound good.”

Julie said, “See?”

John said, “I do. Do you expect points for beating the game on easy level?”

“I guess not. Are you trying to tell me I need to guess what you’re going to eat, too?”

“If you want. I’m having trouble making up my mind.”

“You didn’t have to make yours easy too, John. You’re having the special.”

He looked, and said, “You know, that does sound good.”

Julie replied, “You guys are just too predictable.”

John said, “That’s right. Three or four years ago, you sat right there, and told us you were going to own this place, and we were going to be running a space fleet. I remember it like it was yesterday.”

Julie laughed. “Okay, okay. Maybe it’s just your lunch orders that are predictable. You got me.”

I said, “Be nice, John. She won’t let us come back.”

Julie looked at me. “You know you’re always welcome, Bob. No matter how much crap you pull.”

“Thanks. That almost sounded nice.”

“I almost meant it that way.”

It was my turn to laugh. Julie got up, and turned our orders in. John said, “That was fun.”

“It was, wasn’t it?”

We shot the breeze for a bit, until an old fella got up, and left his buddy sitting at the table. He wandered over, hat in hand. John scooted into the booth, and said, “You don’t have to be like that about it. Sit down and tell us what you need.”

“Are you sure? It’s kinda stupid.”

I said, “Well, you’ve come to the right place, then. We do stupid stuff all the time. Most days we get away with it. What can we do for you?”

“Well, like I said, it’s middlin’ stupid. I’ve got a team of mules that I’ve had most of my life. They’re getting old, and they just cain’t work like they once did. We’ve kinda got to be friends, down through the years, and I’d like to do something for ‘em, if I could.”

John said, “Let me stop you, before you go any further. It just so happens that I have what you need. I had to build a box big enough to take a beefalo not too long ago. I made two of ‘em, just to be sure. I can help your team, no sweat. Where can we pick them up?”

“They’re outside, right now.”

We looked outside, and saw a couple of old mules, standing on a flatbed, casually munching hay. They didn’t appear to be restrained. I asked, “They don’t bother trying to get away?”

The old fella said, “Are you kiddin’? They’re going to be hollering at me that it’s time to go back to work, soon. They like workin’ better than I do. It’s just the miles catching up to them.”

“They sound like good friends to have.”

“They are. Rufus, he don’t jump as good as he once did. I have to back up to a little hill for him to get on the truck in the morning, or when we come to lunch. Sally, she’s still pretty spry, but she’s just not as strong as she once was.”

John put his comm away, and said, “We can take care of that for you. We better go outside, so that you can get them loaded on the ship, to head up and get taken care of. We can have them back in a couple of days. You could head up with them, if you wanted. You’re not lookin’ all that spry yourself.”

“That’s a fact. You suppose my buddy Josh could get in on some of that? We’ve been working together for a lot of years. I wouldn’t want to have to break in a new partner.”

“I don’t have a problem with that.” We got up, and Julie called, “Are you boys leaving, without having anything to eat?”

I replied, “We’ll be back in a minute. Just have to load a ship.”

“Okay, then.”

The fella we had spoken with said, “C’mon, Josh. We’ve got places to be.”

“Alright, Hanns.”

He peeled himself out of their booth, and came with us. Hanns climbed into the truck, and backed up to a bank at the side of the parking lot. He shut it off, and got out. Then he said, “C’mon, Rufus. We’re going for a ride. You too, Sally.”

Rufus turned around, and walked off the truck. Sally followed him, and they came down onto the pavement of the parking lot. The ship settled into an empty space, and dropped its ramp. Hanns asked, “What about my truck? Won’t it be in the way?”

I said, “I know a bunch of bored folks who would be happy to breathe on it for you, while you’re getting fixed up.”

“What are you getting out of doing so much for a couple of old, wore out loggers? We sure cain’t pay you.”

“You never can tell when I might need a favor. It’s better to have friends, than not.”

“That’s for sure.”

I asked, “Hey, I’ve got a question, if it ain’t too snoopy. What kind of name is Hanns?”

“Short for Hanson. They named me after some old boy that come over on the boat.”

He climbed back into the truck, and followed the rest of them aboard. The two fellas waved, and the mules brayed, as the ramp went up.

When the ship lifted, John looked at me and said, “I know you’re good, but I don’t see any way that the company is going to make a profit off of that one.”

“I don’t either. Maybe I can move them to Charlie’s, to cut wood for Jim. At least my family would be better off, even if I couldn’t count it as a profit for the company.”

We went back in, and our lunches were waiting. We sat down, and one of the waitresses came over. She asked, “Pardon me for getting in your business, but where did you send Uncle Hanns?”

John said, “Sent him and his team to get patched up. They look like they could all use a couple days in the box.”

“That’s for sure. Why did he take his truck, then?”

I said, “Well, I’ve got a crew of mechanics, who were just complaining to me about being bored. I figured we might as well patch up the truck, while we were into it.”

“That’s awfully nice of you two. What did he offer you?”

“Nothin’, that I heard. Seemed like the thing to do. He asked nice, and we couldn’t find a good reason to turn him down.”

“You are good folks, you know that?”

“Don’t spread it around. We’re trying to keep up a reputation as nasty old boys.”

“Right! I believe that one. Thanks for helping out my uncle and his friend.”

“You’re welcome.”

She went on about her business. John said, “It is nice to be able to help folks, isn’t it?”

“It sure is.”

We tore into our lunches. When we came up for air, Hanns’ niece came back over. “Did you fellas want some pie?”

John said, “None for me, thanks.”

I said, “Nope. I’d just have to work it off in the gym.”

“If you’re sure. Are you ready for your ticket, then?”

I said, “That would be great.”

When she left to go figure it up, John said, “You’re going to get her in trouble, Bob.”

“I doubt it. Julie will catch her before she gets it made out.”

She came back and said, “I paid it for you, for what you did for my uncle.”

I said, “Now you’re making me feel bad. We were just funning with you, anyway. Julie never lets us pay. We helped her get the money to buy the place.”

She looked at me a little odd. “You’re joking, right?”

“Nope.”

“You mean I paid for meals that were already comped?”

“Afraid you did. How much do we owe you?”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s still worth it, for what you did for Hanns.”

“If you’re sure.”

“I am.” She went on about her business, and we got up to go. I tossed down two Bobs, and so did John.

We went out to the Wagoneer, and I asked, “How is it, George?”

“We had somebody watch it the whole time you were inside, Boss. Nothing happened to it.”

John asked, “Have we just gotten paranoid, Bob?”

“It’s beginning to seem that way. What do you think we ought to do this afternoon?”

“I don’t know.”

We got in the truck, and John started out of the parking lot. Jack came blazing by, lights and siren going full blast. John looked at me and shrugged. I said, “Might as well.”

He pulled out behind Jack, and ran the speed limit, trying to catch up. I ran my window down, to try and hear the siren. We finally caught up, and found Jack at the scene of a nasty wreck. The Fire Department had yet to arrive, and Jack wasn’t able to do much but control the crowd. I said, “George, we need some help!”

“Inbound, Boss.”

“Thanks.”

“Part of the service.”

We got out, and Jack said, “Good to see you two. Can you give me some help keeping people back? That thing is leaking gas like nobody’s business.”

I said, “On it. George, Ringo, see what you can do for the people in the car.”

“On it, Boss.”

I saw that John had drawn his pistol, so I did likewise. I said, in a loud, clear voice, “The bots are helping the people in the car. Please step back, in case that gasoline finds a spark. Step back, please.”

We had managed to move the crowd back a little, when it started raining Marines. The Sergeant in charge shouted, “Nice day for it, Boss. We’ll see what we can do.”

A couple of them started laying foam on the gasoline. Another one found the place it was leaking, and attacked it with mounting putty. When he finished, he backed away and shouted, “Clear.”

The two medbots finished restraining the passengers, and did the same thing.

The rest of the squad eased the car over onto its wheels, and began working on getting the occupants out.

A clinic ship came in and hovered. John and Jack managed to move their part of the crowd back enough to make a place for it to land. It came in with its ramp pointed toward the wreck, and opened up. The Marines brought out the two occupants, on back boards, and brought them over to the ship. The medbot on duty there said, “Straight into the boxes. No time for an examination.”

The Marines did as they were told. Once they had the patients taken care of, they got out of the ship, and the ramp closed. The clinic ship lifted, and the Marines went back to cleaning up the wreck. Jack said, “That was quick. If you guys have this, I’d better call in and tell them not to bother with the Fire Department and the ambulance.”

John said, “Go for it.”

When Jack got finished on the radio, he said, “The Department is busy with a nasty house fire outside of town. They wouldn’t have been able to get here in time. Your people saved the day, Bob.”

“Glad to help. I’ll send you a report on those two when I get it.”

“I hope your people think to get a blood alcohol. It looks to be a one-car accident.”

The Sergeant heard what Jack said, and replied, “Officer, I think you need to have a look at this, before you make up your mind on that one.”

Jack looked at me, and I motioned with my head that he should go see what the Marine was talking about. He went over, and said, “I see what you mean, Marine. It looks like something hit right here, before the crash. The Marine said, “I can analyze a paint sample, if you would like.”

“I would like that very much.”

The Marine very carefully took a sample of the paint transfer, and put it in a small compartment on his arm. A short time later, he said, “That’s odd.”

Jack looked at him, concerned. “What’s odd?”

“The paint comes back as white from a Dodge Charger, like you drive, Sir.”

“You’re saying you think a police car tried to pitt this vehicle, and caused this mess?”

“I’m not saying anything but what my analysis shows, Officer.”

Jack looked back and forth between the mark on the fender, and the front of his cruiser several times. Then he asked, “Marine, could you do me a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Would you be so kind as to see if the dents in this fender match the shape of the fender on my car?”

“Of course. Hold on just a moment, while I get the images.” He studied the dent in the car from the accident, and then he studied the front fender of Jack’s cruiser, where it would have impacted the car, if he had been the one to pitt the other car. He motioned Jack over to the dented car, and generated a hologram of Jack’s fender. He slowly advanced it into the dent, showing a perfect match.

Jack cussed, and got on his radio. “Dispatch, I have reason to believe that this accident was caused by an attempted pitt maneuver. Suspect vehicle is a late model Dodge Charger, white in color, with damage to the front passenger fender. Be advised, it could be a law enforcement vehicle.”

“Roger, Officer Conway. I have a supervisor in route.”

“Roger.”

He put his radio away. He looked at me, and said, “You know this is going to be a mess, don’t you?”

“I do. It looks like we are about to find out if a bot can give testimony in court.”

“I’m hoping we find out it was a civilian vehicle, Bob. I don’t want this to turn into a case against a fellow officer.”

“Dingus can always use you in Security, if you wind up needing a job.”

“I know, but I’d rather it didn’t come to that.”

“Me, too.”

The Marine spoke. “I’m sorry, Sir, but there is a print on the vehicle of the end of a brush bar, like your cruiser carries.”

“I saw it, Marine. Some departments don’t remove those before they sell used cruisers. It’s a slim hope, but it’s all I have at the moment.”

“Sorry, Sir.”

“No worries, Marine. Could you do me a favor, and move this vehicle over to the side of the road, until the tow truck shows up?”

“Sure thing. Would you like us to clean up the street, or do you need some of this mess for evidence?”

“You have good video of everything, don’t you?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“And better scans than our equipment could take, even if you did leave things for us to look at?”

“Yes.”

“Go ahead and clean it up. No need to leave a mess.”

“Yes, Sir.”

He turned to his unit, and said, “You heard the man. Pretty this mess up!”

Jack turned to John and me. “Sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you guys to stick around to give statements.”

John said, “No biggie. I’m guessing that needs to wait until the supervisor is here?”

“It would be best.”

I said, “We didn’t have anything else to do this afternoon.”

Jack replied, “I don’t think it will take all afternoon, Bob. How did you two know I needed help, anyway?”

John said, “I was about to pull out from the restaurant, when you came screaming through. We figured we might as well see if we could do anything to help.”

“Nice of you to bother. I thought you were supposed to be on leave.”

John said, “I’m not any better at that than Bob is. We were both looking for something to do.”

“Fair enough.”

The supervisor pulled in. He got out of his car, surveyed the situation, and walked over. He asked, “Officer Conway, why did you go ahead and clear the scene, before we got any techs here?”

“BSR helped with the recovery, Sir. They’ve got better data than our techs could gather, anyway.”

“That’s what I figured, but I had to hear it from you, for the record. Why do you think there was a law officer involved?”

Jack led him over to the car that had been wrecked, and showed him the dent, taking care to show him where the end of the brush bar had hit. When he had seen all he wanted to, they walked back over to us. The supervisor asked, “And who are these gentlemen?”

“Admiral Wilson, and Captain Branham, of BSR.”

“How did they come to be on the scene?”

“Curiosity, is what I heard, Sir.”

He turned to us. “Is that correct?”

John said, “Close enough. We’re acquainted with Officer Conway, and saw him drive by on his way here when we were leaving the parking lot of the restaurant where we had lunch. Since neither of us had anything we needed to do this afternoon, we decided to follow, and see if there was anything that we could do to render aid.”

“You didn’t think Officer Conway was competent to handle the situation himself?”

“We only saw the one vehicle responding. We wanted to make sure he didn’t need help. We know his wife, and if we were to let him get hurt, we would never hear the end of it.”

He looked at me. “What about you, Admiral? Do you remember events any differently?”

“No, Sir. Captain Branham seems to have a good recollection of events.”

“How did the scene get dealt with so quickly?”

“My security called in some of the resources that they have on call, whenever I’m out and about. They seem to think I’m a trouble magnet, and want to be prepared.”

“I see. Do you know how soon we’ll be able to interview the people from the car?”

“I do not, but I can get that information for you, if you want.”

“Please.”

“Be calm, if you can. You’re about to see something that may bother you.”

“I think I can handle it.”

“George, can you tell the man what he wants to know?”

He faded in, and said, “No, Boss, I can’t. The passenger should wake up in the morning, but the driver’s autodoc has yet to commit to an exit time. It seems he had some internal injuries that are going to be a little more trouble to fix up.”

“I see. Thank you, George.”

“You’re welcome, Boss. Anything else you need?”

“Not at the moment, George.”

He faded out. The supervisor said, “I see why you warned me, now. He hides well.”

“Makes his job easier.”

“His job?”

John hooked his thumb at me and said, “Keeping this idjit alive. None of us want to have to take over his job.”

“I see. So that robot is your security?”

I replied, “Half of it. He has a partner.”

“Just out of curiosity, what would happen if I drew on you right now?”

John said, “You would be stunned. If I know those two, one of them would be quick enough to catch you before you bumped your head.”

“Even if I was taking you into custody?”

I said, “Well, if I had actually done something that would warrant that, it would be a different situation, but there is the whole issue of diplomatic immunity to think about. I’m thinking they would rather discuss the situation with you without the benefit of weapons.”

“Nicely put, Admiral.”

“I try.”

“So, you were responsible for calling down all the help that Officer Conway received with this accident?”

“I think George may have already had them on the way, before I thought to ask, but he works for me, so the responsibility is mine, yes.”

“A fair statement. Thank you, Admiral.”

“You’re welcome. I hope our interference hasn’t harmed your case.”

“I don’t think it will.” He turned to Jack. “You handled this well. We have precedent for accepting help from BSR, so that won’t be a problem. You may return to duty.”

“Yes, Sir.”

I asked, “Is that all you need from us, Sir?”

“Yes, you’re free to go. That was silly, wasn’t it? You could have left any time you liked. There’s nothing else I need. Is that better?”

I replied, “Don’t worry about it. We might have fancy papers and whatnot, but we’re still just trying to help out.”

“Thanks.”

We got in the Wagoneer, and left. John asked, “What now? Drive around until we hear another siren?”

“I don’t think that’s the kind of thing we want to be known for, do you?”

“Nope.”

“Wait a minute, I just thought of something I wanted to check up on, and never did. Might be a fun afternoon, at least.”

John replied, “I’m scared.”

I got out my comm, and called Sue. “Yes, Boss?”

“Did anyone ever have any luck getting into the records at the pawn shop where I bought those guns of my grandpa’s?”

“None of those records are online, Boss. We went through their entire system, and didn’t find a thing.”

“That’s too bad. I had some free time, and I was going to follow up on it.”

“Don’t be impatient, Boss. I wasn’t finished reporting. We knew it was important to you, so the Marines sent in some tiny remotes, and accessed the records that way. They were able to get the information you wanted. Would you like me to text it to you?”

“Please do. Thanks, Sue.”

“All part of the service, Boss.”

“Fly safe, Sue.”

“You too, Boss.”

The line went dead. I pulled up the text with the address. John asked, “Well, you’ve gone this far, are you going to read me the address you’ve illegally obtained? Or are we testing my mental telepathy?”

I read him the name and address. He mused, “Archie Williams. That name sounds familiar, but I don’t remember why.”

“I don’t know. Didn’t ring any bells with me.”

We wound up having to ask GP guess where the road we were looking for happened to be. I had a pretty good idea what part of the county it was in, but that was as far as my knowledge went. When we finally found the road, we wound up not far from the Holler. I wondered, “What do you want to bet this cat knew Dee’s pop?”

“No bet, unless I get to bet that he did.”

We found the address. The house looked like it had dreamed of better days, when it was young, but never saw them. We slid out of the Wagoneer, and started toward the house. A hound raised his head, but decided he liked his nap better. We almost made it into the yard, before the old boy with the shotgun made it onto the porch. He said, “Whatever you bright boys are selling, I don’t need. Get back in that truck and head back to town.”

I said, “I was hoping to be buying something, instead of selling. Are you agin’ good cash money?”

“Nossir, I am not. If you’re wanting this place, just wait a few years. I’m sure my boy will be more than happy to sell it to ya, once I’m out of the way.”

“Ain’t got no interest in your place, ner that hound dog laying over there. Sure don’t want that shotgun you’re so friendly with, either. I just come after some information. I have to think there ain’t nobody left to testify, so you haven’t got to worry about the law.”

“What is it you think an old fart like me would know about, boy?”

“Well, Sir, you sold a couple of guns to the pawn shop in town. Just happens they belonged to my granddaddy, once upon a time. If any more of his stuff is wandering around, I’d like a chance to bid on it.”

“Just who was your granddaddy, boy?”

“Bob Hailey. He was a revenuer.”

“I heard of him. He come up missing, didn’t he?”

“He did. I found him a while back.”

“Are you looking to get the folks that done him in?”

“All of that happened a long time before I was born, Mister. I ain’t got no business messing in it now. I’m just looking to collect up whatever is left of his things.”

“That doesn’t sound like a bad idea, to me. So many folks these days don’t give a dang about what happened before. Dang television has ‘em thinking they ought to act like Yankees. It don’t sit right with me.”

“I can’t say it does my heart any good, either. Heard too many stories about how things used to be. You can’t find a place like that, nowadays.”

“No, you cain’t. I wish I could help you, you seem like a nice enough feller. The fact of the matter is, though, that I got those two guns a long time ago. A man I used to do business with gave ‘em to me, when he didn’t have the cash to pay a debt. I could show you where the old Ford was, that he got ‘em out of, if that would help any.”

“I don’t know if it would or not, but I sure would like to see it.”

“How much would you like to see it?”

I reached for my billfold, easy like. I pulled out a hundred dollar bill, and asked, “Is that interested enough?”

“That looks plenty interested to me, sonny. Put it away, and I’ll be right with you.”

I put my money away, and he turned around to pull the door shut. He locked it with a padlock, and came toward the truck. He said, “I hope you don’t mind me bringing my shotgun, but I just met you boys.”

John said, “It doesn’t bother me.”

We all got in the Wagoneer and our new friend directed John where to drive. He told him where to ‘use that there four wheel drive’ and finally we got to a place where he said, “You done right well getting us this close. You know a thing or two about driving this rig. Ain’t no way you’re gonna get us any closer, though.”

John said, “I’ll take your word for it. I wanna be able to drive this thing home.”

We got out, and the old man led us back into the woods. Sure enough, there was a ‘32 Ford sedan sitting just where he said it would be. I tried the passenger door, and it opened, but it wasn’t happy about it. I pushed the button on the glove box, but the door didn’t open. I wound up getting my knife out to pull the door away from the dash. Inside lay a bunch of papers. On top was the bill of sale, made out to Bob Hailey. I closed up the glove box, and the door, and asked, “I don’t suppose you know who owns this land, do you?”

“Couldn’t tell you that. You looking to buy that old car?”

“I said I was looking for things that belonged to my grandpa. His name’s on the bill of sale in the glove box.”

“I’ll be. Anything else you’d like to know? How to find a Bigfoot, maybe?”

“Why, is your hairy buddy standing behind me with a club?”

“Why would you think I know any of ‘em?”

“Anybody who lives this far back in the woods is gonna know about ‘em, at the very least. As long as you’ve been at it, I’d be surprised if you hadn’t made friends with one or two of ‘em.”

“Anybody ever tell you that you ain’t as dumb as you look, boy?”

“Some. It would take work to be that dumb, and I’m middlin’ lazy.”

He laughed. “You ain’t half bad, boy.”

“You’re alright, yourself.”

I made a note of the coordinates on my phone, and we walked back to the Wagoneer. When John got us back to the old boy’s place, I gave him the C-note, and thanked him. He said, “I didn’t do anything. Just took a ride with you boys, and a little walk in the woods. It was nice to have company. Good meeting you boys.” He walked off to his shanty, and we headed back for town. I called Nikki. “Hey, Caveman! Having fun?”

“I suppose I am. John and I just went on a treasure hunt with a nice older gentleman. Do you suppose you could find something out for me?”

“If it’s on a computer, I’m your girl, Caveman.”

“If I sent you some GPS coordinates, do you think you could find out who owns the land?”

“Sure. What did you find?”

“Grandpa’s car. I figure there might be some interesting clues in it, if we got it back to the Gene.”

“There might be at that. Are you going to let the band work on it, so we can go for a drive?”

“There’s a thought. I’ll send you the numbers, and maybe we can buy the land, without letting them know what it is we’re after.”

“Sounds like a plan. Are you going to be home for supper?”

“I don’t know. What time is it?”

“Are you boys nearly back to town?”

“We’re definitely headed that way.”

“I think it would work out better if we met you at Julie’s, to tell you the truth. It’s getting pretty late.”

“Okay, then. Are you going to tell Jane?”

“She’s the one who came up with the idea. She’s sitting right here.”

“I see.”

“Send me those coordinates. I should have an answer for you at supper.”

“Okay. Love you.”

“Love you too, Caveman.”

The line went dead, and I sent the coordinates. John asked, “What kind of e-ville plan do they have cooked up?”

“They want us to meet them at Julie’s.”

“That will work. It is getting to be about that time.”

“I wonder how hard it’s going to be to buy that piece of ground?”

“No telling.”

We got to the restaurant, and went inside. Julie pointed at the back room. We did as we were told. I’m not sure why I was surprised to see Oleta sitting with Dee and Dingus, but I was. Phillus was with them as well. I said, “Hi folks. I didn’t realize this was going to be quite as much of an affair.”

Dingus replied, “The ladies set it up, Bob. I’m not sure what’s going on either.”

Dee said, “We just wanted to get everyone together. Seems as if you’ve been having some adventures without us, Bob.”

“Nothing to speak of, I don’t think. I guess I have had kind of a busy day, though.”

“That’s surely what I’ve heard.”

I asked, “How did you get out of the box so quickly, Mrs. Books?”

“They said there wasn’t much wrong with me besides age. They fixed the arthritis, and took a few years off. I can go back in later to get some more years, if I want.”

“Why do I think there’s more to that story?”

“I wouldn’t know. Couldn’t be that you’re paranoid, could it?”

“It could be, but I don’t think that’s the problem, this time.”

Dee laughed. “I’m trying to get her to join up, and she’s afraid she’ll have to, if I make her young again.”

I replied, “I’m sure you would be a good employee for the company, but it certainly doesn’t matter to me how young you get. Working for us or not is your choice.”

“I get the feeling that not many people tell you ‘no’, even so.”

“I think that has more to do with getting to play with the cool tech, than it does working for me.”

“Think whatever you want to.”

Nikki and the kids came in about then. I asked, “How did you get that many people in the Yukon?”

“Eve is parked out back, Caveman.”

“That would do it.” Jane came in with Greg and Mary Anne. I said, “Hi, Jane. I didn’t mean to run off with him for all day.”

“Don’t worry about it, Bob. He needed it every bit as much as you.”

“If you say so.”

Nikki said, “I’m afraid I have some bad news, Caveman.”

“What’s that, Space Cadet?”

“We won’t be able to buy that land.”

“Why is that?”

“Some mysterious outfit from out of town owns it, and they never turn loose of anything.”

I picked up something, running across her face, but I wasn’t sure what. She was getting better with her tells. I asked, “Are you sure we couldn’t do business with this bunch?”

“I’m sure.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because it’s BSR, you big dummy!”

John said, “She got you good. Max must have decided that it was a good thing to have, for some reason.”

“I haven’t looked at a map, but I have to think it isn’t far from the Holler. He’s probably trying to build a buffer zone.”

“Sounds right.”

I asked, “So, you went ahead and sent a team to recover the car, and start work on it?”

“I did. Topper can’t wait to get his hands on it.”

“He already finished Dakota’s car, and Hanns’ truck?”

“He said that both of those would be done by morning.”

“That bunch is amazing.”

I noticed a minivan through the windows. It parked near the back door. The window frame didn’t give me an angle to see who got out, but I thought I had recognized the van. I looked at Dingus. “Decided it was time to give Oleta a little test?”

“I didn’t order anything, Bob. The Gunny brought them down of his own accord.”

“You didn’t mention that you had someone new, who ought to meet them?”

“I didn’t say a word, Bob.”

I saw something in his face, but he wasn’t lying to me. I wondered what the actual story was, but I didn’t think it was important enough to keep digging. Gunny Mummer and his crew came through the kitchen access. He asked, “Did we make it in time for supper?”

I replied, “You sure did, Gunny. Good to see you!”

“Good to see you too, Boss! How have you been?”

“Doing well, I suppose. Yourself?”

“If I complain, this bunch reminds me how much better we have it than we did back home.”

“I know about that.”

Oleta asked, “Excuse my ignorance, but I’ve never met anyone like you before. Where are you from?”

Gunny looked at his watch, and thought a moment. “About three days flying time, out that way.”

“From what I hear about BSR ships, that must be quite a ways.”

“It sure is. We’ve seen things working for the company that we never would have seen, if we had stayed home.”

“You’re able to drive?”

“Well, not without some help from Captain Topper and the band. They had to adapt some of the controls on our van, so that we could reach them, and still see out. We all have valid BSR driving licenses, though, and the local authorities don’t give us trouble unless we do something stupid.”

I looked at Dee. “Looks like she passed. John hasn’t had to get out the smelling salts, at least.”

“Beatrix should be here any time. That will be more of a test, I’m thinking.”

“Beatrix can be a lot to take in.”

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it!”

“I do, and that doesn’t keep winding you up from being fun. Why didn’t you invite Lakki and Jossi, if you really wanted to see what she was up for?”

“As a matter of fact, they’re riding down with Beatrix.”

“I hope I have time to take Jossi by and show him what they did with our old houses. It’s a shock to the system.”

Oleta asked, “What happened to your old house?”

“They tore it down, and put up a Dollar General.”

“That would be hard to get used to.”

“Progress, I guess.”

Dingus said, “You know, they don’t have stores like that in the Commonwealth, where you can buy cheap stuff.”

I looked at him, and asked, “You’re not suggesting we export discount stores, are you?”

“It might be a profit stream. You’re always worried about staying in the black.”

“I’m not sure the Commonwealth wouldn’t see it as an act of war, once they figured out the level of quality of some of that stuff.”

“It’s not like you can buy something that cheap and expect it to last.”

“True enough, but folks don’t like to have their noses rubbed in it.”

The conversation was interrupted by a ship landing in the back parking lot. Jossi and Lakki got out, followed by Pris and Wrench. Then Thump came out squiring Beatrix. It wasn’t long before they were inside, and Thump was saying, “Evenin’, folks. Nice of you to invite us.”

I replied, “Good to see you, Thump. How are things?”

“A little slow, to tell the truth. You would think between those hotheads at the Patrol, and the kids at the Academy, I’d have plenty to work on, but Zoom has everything idiot proofed to the point they really have to work to break anything.”

“I found some work for the band, do I need to see what I can find for you?”

“I was just blowing off steam, Boss. You don’t have to go to any trouble for me.”

“No biggie.”

John said, “How’s that fella who built the emitters for the Karen doing? What’s his name, Xander?”

“I think he’s making some progress, but not as much as he would like. What are you thinking, Old Buddy?”

“I was thinking that Beatrix and Thump could have a nice vacation in the sunny Southwest, while Thump explained to him the error in his ways.”

Nikki asked, “Wouldn’t Frank be the man for that job?”

John replied, “You put Xander and Frank in the same room, you wouldn’t hear from them for the better part of a year. Thump knows enough to keep him from wasting his time, without making it easy for him.”

Thump said, “Beatrix has been trying to get me to learn more about Earth culture. The girls could use some time around other people their own age, sure enough.”

I said, “Let me get ahold of Xander, and see if that sounds like something he would want to do.”

I whipped out my comm. Nikki said, “Are you really going to work at supper?”

“Just one call. I’m trying to be good. John started it.”

“I knew leaving you two together all day was a bad idea.”

“What are you talking about? We found Grandpa’s car.”

Dingus asked, “What now?”

“You remember the other day when we were in the pawn shop, and I found those guns that belonged to my grandpa? The Marines snuck in and got a look at the records. We went to see the fellow who sold them, and he took us to where Grandpa’s car was parked, back in the woods. Even better, Max had already bought the land.”

Dee asked, “That’s not going to bring up bad feelings, is it? I like the way things are.”

“They were both doing what they thought they had to do, Dee. If it hadn’t been your dad, it would have been someone else. What did he think he was doing, going after people by himself?”

“I’m glad you see it that way.”

Oleta was eyeing Jossi and Lakki. Jossi asked, “Something I could help you with, Ma’am?”

“I’m new here. I was just admiring your beautiful fur.”

“It is nice to have it again. I’m even getting used to having a tail.”

“You’ve lost me.”

“Oh, I spent a long time in the autodoc to look like one of you, and spent several years undercover on this planet. In this town, as a matter of fact. Didn’t you used to work at the Historical Society?”

“I did. You’re saying you know me?”

“I wouldn’t say that, but we did meet a time or two. I used to go by Joshua.”

“Really? You’re that nice young man who always used to bring me walnut cookies when you came in?”

“Guilty as charged.”

“I have to say you’ve changed.”

“That I have. I’m not all that has changed, though.” He turned to me. “Have you seen what they’ve done to our old places?”

“I have. I was going to show you later, but it sounds like Thump beat me to it.”

“I had him run us by there, on the way in. I know they joke about those things sprouting wherever there’s an empty lot, but I didn’t expect one there.”

“I can’t say I did, either. I’m guessing they figure to get business from the people working in the industrial park around the corner.”

“That’s the only way it makes sense to me. Oh crap, I got to talking, and forgot I was going to make a call. I’ll be right back.”

I walked over to the corner of the room, and got out my comm. I called Xanadu, and was connected with Xander’s lab. When he got to the phone, he said, “Yes? I’ll be going home soon, Sis.”

I replied, “You’re wrong on both counts, Xander. I’m not your Sis, and even I know you well enough to know that you’re going to sleep in the lab again.”

“Admiral! Nice to hear your voice. What can I do for you?”

“Well, it seems like you’re putting in an awful lot of effort, and not getting much in the way of return. What would you think if I sent one of our engineers to help get you started on the right path?”

“That would be great. I’m at the Edison stage, right now. I’ve found tons of things that don’t work, but nothing that does.”

“He’s out of much to do, so I’ll send him along. He’s kind of a big fella, so don’t get excited.”

“I’ll try not to. Thanks, Admiral. Fly safe!”

“You’re welcome, Xander. Be careful in the lab.”

“You’re asking a lot, Admiral.”

“No more than your sister.”

“True.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. Hanns’ niece was taking drink orders when I got back to the table. She got to the Gunny, and asked, “And what for you, young man?”

“I may be small, Ma’am, but I don’t doubt I’m as old as you. Do you have Moosehead?”

“No, but we have Molson. Would that do?”

“I’m willing to try it, anyway.”

“I’ll get that for you. Sorry about the confusion.”

“Not a problem. At least you didn’t confuse me with a teddy bear.”

“Just because I didn’t act on it, doesn’t mean I didn’t have the urge to cuddle with you.”

“Well, then. That’s the best offer I’ve had in weeks.”

She turned red, and moved on down the table. When she got to me, she said, “Your whole outfit is as ornery as you are, aren’t they?”

“Pretty much. We select for that in the interview process. It seems to get us people who are better equipped to handle situations that don’t fit what they’ve seen before.”

“I guess I can see how that would work. What would you like to drink?”

“I’m not working this evening, I suppose I could have one of those Molsons, like you offered the Gunny.”

“Gunny? That little fellow is a Sergeant?”

“That little fellow can peel the paint off a recruit before he knows what happened. He’s good help.”

Gunny said, “Thanks, Boss.”

“I didn’t tell her a thing that wasn’t the truth.”

She said, “But he’s so small.”

I replied, “It ain’t the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

Dingus said, “That’s for sure.”

She nodded, and headed back to the kitchen. She came back with our drinks, and a couple of helpers to carry them. Just when she thought she had things under control, Zoom and Diego came screaming into the back lot, and parked next to the other ships. She asked, “What was that about?”

Nunya said, “Oh, they always run a little late.”

They came hustling in. Zoom said, “I didn’t mean to keep you folks waiting.”

Nikki said, “We’re just getting settled in, Zoom. Don’t worry about it.”

Our waitress got their drink orders, and sent one of her helpers back after them. Then they started taking dinner orders. By the time they had finished that, some of us needed refills. Once they had gone after those, I said, “Standing order, Captains and above. Tip tonight will be two Bobs. These ladies are working hard.”

All the captains in attendance said, “Aye, Boss.”

Our refills came out, and when the waitresses had left, I asked, “What kept you, Diego?”

“Zoom had a discipline issue at the Academy.”

Milly asked, “What happened?”

Zoom replied, “One of the ones you’ve been riding herd on decided that since you weren’t around, it would be a good time to try something.”

Milly replied, “I can’t imagine that worked out well.”

“I made sure that it didn’t.”

“Thanks. I’ll be back soon.”

“You don’t have to rush. I think they’ve figured out that I’m at least as hard to get along with as you.”

Nunya said, “You know Zoom can lay down the law, when she wants to.”

Milly replied, “I do. I also know that we’re supposed to take care of the minor stuff, so that she doesn’t have to.”

Zoom said, “It doesn’t hurt me to have to deal with some of it. Enjoy your time off.”

“If you’re sure.”

“I am. If you show up at the Academy before your leave has expired, I’ll just ship you back to Earth.”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

Oleta had been watching this exchange with some interest. She asked Zoom, “You run an Academy?”

“Yes, I do. Most of the first class were Loonies, and the Boss thought I would be someone they could relate to.”

“I’m sorry, this is my first time at one of these. Loonies?”

“People who grew up on the Moon. There used to be a pirate base there.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t feel bad, nobody on Earth knew about it, until the Boss figured it out.”

“Why would the, ah, Loonies get along better with you?”

“Because I am one. Didn’t you notice how tall I am?”

“I did notice, but it never registered that it meant something.”

Nunya stood up. “I grew up there too. We had to go in the autodoc to be strong enough to function in a full gravity.”

Oleta replied, “I sure am getting an education tonight.”

Janet said, “Oh, I don’t know about that. Lilly isn’t here. She’s an education, all by herself.”

“Lilly?”

Nikki said, “She’s a little girl who likes Bob a lot. She just happens to be from a species of intelligent kangaroos.”

“Intelligent kangaroos, did you say?”

“I’m afraid I did.”

Oleta just shook her head. “I don’t know whether to believe you folks, or not.”

Dee said, “They haven’t told you anything yet that wasn’t true. Not that Bob wouldn’t, if he thought he could get away with it.”

I said, “Now wait a minute, Dee. You’d do the very same thing.”

“I never said I wouldn’t. What were you up to today, that you and John came dragging in so late?”

“I’m not sure I want to talk about that with you, when we’re trying to have a nice meal.”

“The only things between you and me are so old that neither one of us is going to get too wound about them. Go ahead and spill it. What did you find this time?”

“Just Grandpa’s car, like I said before.”

“How did you manage that?”

“Your old man told you about those guns I found at the pawn shop, didn’t he?”

“He did.”

“The Marines were able to get to the paperwork, and find out who sold them. John and I went to talk to him, and the only thing he was able to tell us was where Grandpa’s car was.”

“So that was what you were talking about with Nikki when you first came in. I wondered what that was. Do you think you’re going to find much in it?”

“I really doubt it. The old boy who showed it to us said that the fellow who had given him the guns had taken them out of the car. I doubt he missed much.”

“Why are you so sure it was your Grandpa’s car, then?”

“The bill of sale in the glove box with his name on it.”

“That would do it.”

Oleta had been getting a frown going all through this conversation. She asked, “Dee, what are you two talking about now?”

“Oh, Bob’s grandpa was a revenuer. My dad shot him. Bob has a hobby of trying to find all of his grandpa’s stuff.”

She looked back and forth between the two of us, and finally she asked me. “You know that her dad killed your grandpa, and it doesn’t bother you?”

“From what I hear, Grandpa was an idjit. Went up the holler by himself, when he should have taken backup. I don’t see how I can blame her for the fact that I’m descended from idjits. Besides, we were friends before we ever figured out any of this.”

“Still, it seems like a lot to overlook.”

Dingus said, “Ma’am, Bob has plenty to worry about without going and looking for something from years ago to be mad about. He just isn’t going to get wound up about it, unless he just has to, and Dee is trying to make sure that doesn’t happen, because she happens to like the big lug.”

I said, “Bust somebody out of an old folks home, and all of a sudden you’re their hero. Danged if I understand it.”

Dee said, “I was in that joint, waiting to die, when you came through the door with a big ol’ box of Russell Stover, and a crazy story that sounded like what Grandpa used to tell me. The next thing I knew, you had proven the whole mess to me, and got me out of that joint, to boot. If that ain’t a hero, it’ll do ‘til one comes along.”

Oleta said, “You mean that story you told me about the guy asleep in the back yard wasn’t made up?”

Dee hooked a thumb at Dingus. “Does he look made up?”

Oleta looked him over, and said, “No, he surely does not. Are you telling me he was asleep in your backyard, when you were growing up?”

“I am.”

Oleta just shook her head. I asked, “Were you trying to break her, Dee?”

“She can handle it. She’s just making a fuss so that we don’t think we’re taking it easy on her, and start laying it on thicker.”

“I see.”

I was trying to think of what we could do next, just to see how much she could handle, when our supper came out of the kitchen, and I had better things to worry about. I said the regular blessing, and then Dingus said the Squatch version. We had caught Oleta, as she started to get a forkful when I finished. She asked, “What was that second blessing about?”

Dingus said, “That’s the way some friends of ours do it. We just got in the habit of including them.”

Oleta looked over at the Gunny. He replied, “Don’t look at me, Ma’am. The folks he’s talking about might look a little like us, but they are quite a bit bigger.”

She looked back at Dee. Dee said, “Sasquatch, or Bigfoot, whichever you like. Good folks, once you get past the language barrier.”

“How did you get to know them?”

Dee pointed at me. “He challenged one of them to a farting contest.”

“You’re kidding!”

Nikki said, “She is not! Thank goodness they had it outside.”

I just smiled, and kept eating. Oleta looked at me, and asked, “Aren’t you going to stick up for yourself?”

“They haven’t said anything that wasn’t true yet. I lost the contest, but I made a good friend. I figure I did alright.”

She shook her head again, and started in on her plate.

Gunny said, “That is one thing about this planet. You folks do cook some fine food. I always look forward to shore leave here.”

Jossi said, “Julie even got them to put walnut sauce on our steaks. Good stuff!”

Lakki replied, “You’re just a sucker for walnut sauce, wherever you can get it.”

“I resemble that remark.”

Thump said, “They do cook a good steak here. I’m just happy I don’t have to eat vegetarian anymore.”

Oleta asked, “Why did you have to eat vegetarian?”

“We lived in an underground installation. We were doing well just to raise enough to eat, without trying to raise any animals.”

Beatrix said, “It’s a long story, dear. I can catch you up some other time, if you want.”

“That would be nice.”

“No, it wouldn’t. The whole story is sad.”

Thump said, “We didn’t know any better. We thought we had the best life that was available. We didn’t know the whole story, and that kept us in a bad situation.”

Dingus said, “And then Bob came riding in, and tore up everything you knew.”

Thump replied, “It needed tearing up, Dingus.”

“I never said it didn’t. Just seems wherever we fly, it amounts to ‘China shop, meet bull’.”

I said, “Topper probably wouldn’t like the idea, but I could go back to Captain, and you can have the star, Dingus.”

“No, thanks. I never said you did anything that didn’t need doing. Sorry if I implied that, Bob.”

Oleta was looking back and forth between the two of us, She asked, “Why is it so bad to be in charge of the fleet, Dingus?”

“Because Bob is either lucky, or skilled, or something, but he always brings his people home. I don’t know that I could do that well. The fleet deserves the best Admiral they can get, and for all his faults, Bob is it. He doesn’t go about it the way anyone else would, but it works for him, and that’s what gets us all home. Messing with that would be just plain stupid.”

I replied, “I just wish I had a better idea of what I’m doing right, so that I could make sure and keep doing it.”

John said, “I’ve thought about that too, Bob. I’ve yet to figure out what it is you’re doing exactly, but one thing I have figured out is that it’s more about who you are, and less about how you do things. You’ve changed a lot since we started doing this, but deep inside, you still have those same values that get us through the tough bits.”

I replied, “Careful, John. You’re going to give me delusions of adequacy.”

“Just because I trust you to run the fleet doesn’t mean I’m going to quit giving you crap.”

“That’s good to hear, at least. You were beginning to sound like I was the ‘Chosen One’ or some crap.”

Nikki said, “I chose you, but other than that, I think you’re safe, Caveman.”

Oleta asked, “Caveman?”

Nikki replied, “Well, when I first came to Earth, I thought it was a primitive planet. I joked with him about being a caveman, and it stuck. He calls me Space Cadet.”

“Back up. You’re not from here?”

“Nope. I took a job flying a junk saucer, and it broke down on me. I hid it in his garage, trying to get it back in the air. He got home before I could, and helped me with it.”

“But you have kids.”

“And another one on the way. People from the Commonwealth are cross-fertile with people from Earth, and no, we haven’t figured out exactly why. There was a big shipload of Commonwealth folks who got marooned here a while back, and modern humans have a lot in common with them. That still doesn’t explain how they were fertile with Neaderthals.”

“I see.”

Nikki continued, pointing at Dingus. “I sure didn’t expect to find Grandpa, when I came here.”

Dingus said, “I’m glad you did. That power core wouldn’t have lasted much longer.”

Oleta asked, “Power core?”

Dingus replied, “The battery that was running the autodoc I was in.”

“Oh. You folks have a lot of stories, don’t you?”

Dee said, “Oh, Hon. You’re just scratching the surface.”

She looked around the table, and most everyone was nodding.

She said, “This is going to be interesting.”

Janet said, “I guess that’s one word for it, huh, Nunya?”

Nunya replied, “Yep.”

Oleta asked, “I’m sorry, did she just call you Nunya?”

“It’s my name, why wouldn’t she?”

“I’m a little slow this evening. How did you get a name like Nunya?”

“I mouthed off to the Boss the first time I met him, and he wouldn’t call me anything else. I decided I liked it.”

Oleta thought a moment, and asked, “He asked you your name, and you told him ‘nunya bizness’?”

“Right on the first guess. He was already a little upset with me, for finding a security flaw in the bots.”

“The bots have a security flaw?”

George faded in, and said, “Not any more. Scotti found the problem, and managed to fix it.”

“Scotty?”

I said, “The Chief Engineer on the Gene Cernan.”

“Your Chief Engineer is named Scotty?”

“Not for Montgomery Scott. For the lady from Mythbusters, Scottie Chapman.”

“Nothing is ever simple with you bunch, is it?”

Nikki said, “Just Bob.”

John said, “I didn’t think we were supposed to say that in front of him.”

Dingus said, “That was the memo I got.”

Diego said, “Me too.”

When I quit laughing, I said, “It’s nice to have friends.”

Oleta was shaking her head. Dee said, “It’s good to see them able to relax this much. We’ve been out in the black taking care of business too much lately.”

Gunny said, “That’s for sure. It’s good to be dirtside for a change.”

George faded back in, and said, “That remains to be seen. Incoming.”

Nikki asked, “Do we need to find cover?”

“Scotti has been over this building since the last shooting. Those windows will stop anything they have.”

A limo pulled into the lot flying the Chinese flag. It was escorted by several large sedans. Each of the sedans disgorged a number of fellows who looked to be intending us harm. Strangely enough, they all decided to have a nap, instead. George said, “The fighters managed to leave the Ambassador awake, if you would like to speak with him, Boss.”

An assault ship had landed, and the Marines were cleaning up all the folks taking naps. George asked, “The Marines would like to know what you would like done with their weapons, Boss?”

“Just pinch the barrels enough that they won’t function, and put them in the trunks of their vehicles.”

“They say they have found something that the Deputy Security head has had them looking for.”

“Tell them to clear it, and bring it to her, then.”

Jane asked, “What did they get?”

“A micro-Uzi. They said you had left orders to bring any such weapon to you.”

“I did.”

I said, “I didn’t realize it was Christmas already.”

Jane replied, “It is now!”

A Marine came in from the kitchen, carrying the Uzi, and a handful of magazines. He handed them to Jane, and asked, “Where would you like this bunch delivered, Boss?”

“Someplace they would consider inconvenient. Say, a prison yard, just for grins?”

“Does that mean we get to laugh at the Earth authorities, when they can’t find an excuse to hold onto them?”

“I suppose it does.”

“Are you coming out to speak with the Ambassador?”

“He really did come in person?”

“He did. We thought that was a little weird, ourselves.”

“Go ahead and stun the people in that car, as well. Make sure he isn’t rigged for suicide, one way or another. The only reason I can see for him coming here is to generate some kind of incident.”

“Understood, Boss. Would you like us to take him somewhere, until you have time to speak with him?”

“Make sure the car doesn’t have anything he could hurt himself with, including his guards. We can deliver them to the Embassy later. Leave the Ambassador in the car, and weld the doors shut. It wouldn’t hurt to unhook the battery, while you’re into it, just to make sure he doesn’t get up to any mischief. Load the car on the Evans, and I’ll have a word with him when we’re finished eating.”

“Will do, Boss.”

Nikki asked, “What do you intend to ask him?”

“I don’t really think I’ll bother to ask him anything. I was thinking more along the lines of telling him that I wasn’t going to tolerate any more of his shenanigans.”

Dingus asked, “That’s the Chinese flag, ain’t it?”

“Yep.”

“What did you do to aggravate them?”

“It seems that those folks we helped John’s friend Eddie with were working with the Chinese. He doesn’t seem to like the idea that we put them out of business.”

“Has he called forth the wrath of Bob?”

“Not yet, but he certainly acts like he wants to.”

“That’s not a wise plan. Doesn’t he know that?”

I replied, “I’m not sure what he’s thinking, Dingus. I’m still at the stage where I’m willing to let it go with a serious embarrassment. Knowing the way his government operates, I doubt that will go well for him, anyway.”

Oleta asked, “The Chinese Ambassador just brought a bunch of thugs to try and shoot you, and you’re not more worried about it than that?”

“Why would I worry? I didn’t even have to draw my weapon. The Marines took care of it, without any gunplay at all. Jane even got a nice toy out of the deal.”

“I don’t understand, at all.”

Dee said, “He’s not going to escalate. He’s already shown the Chinese that they can’t harm him, no matter what they try, so he has nothing to prove. He’s just playing with them, at this point.”

She shook her head. Lakki said, “Ma’am, I’ve seen him face down space fleets. This bunch doesn’t amount to much, compared to that.”

“They came to kill him, didn’t they?”

I said, “I’m not sure about all that. I can’t see why the Ambassador would come with them, if all they were here for was to try and kill us. There must have been more of a plan to it than that.”

John asked, “Do you think they were going to try and take you hostage, to negotiate for some kind of tech?”

“Either that, or they hoped to get some of my family, thinking that would give them more leverage.”

“Either way, given our history, how could they think they had a chance?”

I replied, “I surely don’t know. We’ve gone out of our way to make sure there was no doubt in their minds, and yet they keep coming. I surely don’t understand it.”

Jane asked, “Do you think we would be able to get anything useful from the Ambassador?”

“I doubt it. His superiors wouldn’t have let him do something as stupid as to personally attend my kidnapping, if they thought he had any information we could use. I have to think he has someone on his staff who would rather see someone else with his position, and they talked him into this, to make him look bad.”

John asked, “Should we take care of that for them, or try and prop him up, just to keep them from getting what they want?”

“My first instinct is to make him look as silly as we possibly can, so that the next fellow will think twice before he comes after us.”

Dingus said, “You know how these fellows are, Bob. ‘The last guy failed because he wasn’t as smart as I am. I’m sure I can make it work.’ That’s their motto, as near as I can tell.”

“I know what you mean, Dingus. Do you have any good ideas?”

“Not a one. I suppose you could deliver him back to his Embassy, like nothing ever happened, and let them sort it out.”

I looked down the table at Zoom. She said, “Oh no, here it comes. What do you want me to do, Boss?”

“I just need the answer to one engineering question, Zoom. No biggie.”

“Your questions are never ‘No biggie’, Boss. What do you need to know?”

“Is the Ambassador’s limo well enough reinforced that we could pick it up with a rescue eye on the roof?”

“Hang on one, Eve is running the scans for me.” There was a short pause, and Zoom said, “Yes, Boss. The reinforcement they put in for the bulletproofing would let you get away with it, as long as you were gentle.”

“So, theoretically, we could drop him on the helipad on the Embassy roof?”

“I don’t see why not. I doubt the roof would take the weight of the Evans, but as long as you hover, and use the crane, it should be no problem.”

“Sounds like fun.”

Dee said, “All that worrying you’ve been doing, Oleta? You got ahead of yourself. Now is the time to worry, if Bob is talking about having fun.”

“You mean Bob having fun isn’t a good thing?”

“Oh, it’s a fine thing. It’s just that people usually don’t take it well, when he has fun at their expense.”

We finished eating, I said, “Everyone who wants to come watch the show, load up on the Evans. I’ve changed my mind about trying to get anything out of this guy.”

I dropped two Bobs on the table, as did the each of the Captains. We walked out to the Evans, to find people trying to figure out who would get to go along. I said, “George, call in another freighter, to haul the rest of the spectators, would you?”

“Sure thing, Boss.”

Zoom started laughing, and I asked, “What’s so funny, Zoom?”

“I just ran the numbers again. You’ll be fine, as long as the doors are welded. They’re probably going to cut them open to get the Ambassador out, before they try to move the car. If they try to lift it the same way you’re going to, without the doors welded, it will fold right up.”

“That is funny. We should leave a fighter overhead to get video of it.”

Diego said, “I already gave the order, Boss.”

“Thanks.”

Jack came rolling up. He got out of his cruiser, and walked over. He asked, “What’s all the excitement?”

“Just giving the Chinese Ambassador a ride back to D.C. Nothing special.”

“How did the Chinese Ambassador happen to be here?”

“That’s a question I’d like the answer to. Just happens that I don’t have the patience to get an answer out of him, at the moment.”

“You say you’re tired of fooling with him, and his flunkies?”

“I don’t think I ever said that out loud, Jack.”

“Maybe you didn’t. The Department got a panicked sounding call about several carloads of mafia types headed this way. Do you know anything about that?”

“They must have driven a long way. They all decided to take a nap, when they got out of their cars. We thought it would only be neighborly to move them somewhere they wouldn’t be woken up.”

“That was nice of you. Where did your people take them?”

“I hear that prison life can be very restful.”

“Yours, or ours?”

“Yours. I figured they had enough high-powered lawyers to get back on the street fairly quickly.”

“What, may I ask, did you do with any weapons they might have been carrying?”

“Deactivated them, and gave them back.”

“Deactivated them how, exactly?”

“The Marines were nice enough to pinch the barrels. If they can find new barrels, their weapons will be ready to go.”

“If they’re dumb enough to try them without a new barrel?”

“That might not be best, either for them, or for the weapons.”

“I see. It looks like you’ve taken care of any problem that there might have been here. I don’t see anything that I need to take official notice of.”

“That’s kind of you.”

“Have a good evening, Mr. Wilson.”

“You too, Officer Conway.”

He got back into his cruiser, and drove away. Oleta said, “He was nice. I would have expected him to ask more questions.”

Dee said, “He knows better than to ask those kinds of questions while he has his uniform on. He’ll get his curiosity taken care of, the next time he sees us when he’s off duty.”

We loaded up on the Evans and headed for DC. The Ambassador was beginning to wake up. I ignored him. Eve asked, “Boss, would you like to see some video of the deliveries?”

“Deliveries?”

“Those fellows getting accustomed to their new locations.”

“That ought to be amusing. Show us what you have.”

She put up a split screen, showing several different prison yards. Strangely enough, the action in each scene was very similar. A freighter came in low, dropped its ramp, and rolled a large sedan out the back.  Some of the ships took fire from the guard towers, but not all of them. None of them were damaged, at least. Somehow, the Marines had convinced the passengers to stay in their vehicles until they were unloaded. I figured that the less I knew about that process, the better. In nearly every case, once the drivers realized they were inside a walled facility, they drove for the gates, full speed. Needless to say, the guards on the towers took a dim view of that. Luckily, they managed to disable the cars without doing too much damage to the occupants. I was glad of that, since I hadn’t even considered the fact that they might get hurt, given our selection of return point. Live and learn, I guess. One of the fighters taking video pushed in close on the occupants of their vehicle frantically scrambling, trying to find their weapons. I was glad that I had the Marines put the weapons in the trunks, rather than returning sabotaged weapons to their owners. It didn’t take long for the prison guards to get control of the situation. Once things were under control, the video feed cut out. I turned to find Janet perched on top of the Ambassador’s limo, attaching a rescue eye. When she finished, she waved and said, “Hi, Dad! I won the coin toss.”

I turned to see Milly running the winch, and Nunya looking as if she felt left out. I turned back to Janet, and said, “Be careful out there. I don’t want to have to explain anything to your mother.”

“Yes, Dad.”

The ramp started down, and Milly picked up the limo. She eased the crane out, and gently put the car on the helipad. Janet shot solvent, and the eye came loose. Milly ran her back into the bay, and we began to lift out. Once the crane was back inside, the ramp came up. I expected to hear from someone upset about what we had done in short order, but we made it back to the restaurant without incident. I think the tourists we waved at were surprised to see so many people aboard the Evans, but I’m sure the one lady was able to wash off her false teeth, no problem.

John asked, “Do you need a ride home?”

“I’ll just ride home on the Evans. Thanks anyway. Do you wanna get together again tomorrow?”

“Might as well. It’s good to be able to pretend things are something like they used to be.”

“It is, ain’t it?”

“See you in the morning, then.”

“See you then.”

He headed toward his Wagoneer. Dee and Oleta came over. Oleta said, “That was quite a show, Admiral. Have you ever thought about a YouTube channel of your own?”

“I get more exposure than I want, just introducing the Allbot Brothers. I’m happy with the way things are.”

“If you say so.”

“Well, Ma’am, if we were to put out video of all the stuff we pull, then the governments involved would have to acknowledge that some of these things actually happened. As it is, they’re able to keep it down to rumors, for the most part. I don’t want to give them anymore reason to dislike us than I just have to.”

“I can see how that would work better for you and your company. You’re not as dumb as you look, are you?”

“Ma’am, it would take a good deal of work to be as dumb as I look. I’m way too lazy for that.”

She laughed. “You’re alright, Mr. Wilson.”

“You’re not so bad yourself. I’m kinda hoping Dee here talks you into signing on with us.”

“I’m still thinking about that.”

They headed out, and the ramp started up. Gus patted the seat beside him, and said, “You’d better sit down, Dad.”

“You’re right about that.”

I sat, and asked, “How are you making it, Short Round?”

“Oh, I’m doing okay. I’ve been hanging out with the band. They let me help on some of the easy stuff.”

“Sounds like a good time. Tomorrow should really be interesting.”

“Why’s that?”

“They should be able to start on my grandpa’s car. It’s been sitting in the woods for a long time. I don’t even know how much of it they’ll be able to save.”

“Ozzie told me about how they had to build the Chevelle from scratch. I bet they can fix it up.”

“I’m sure they can. It’s a fairly popular model, so they should be able to find most of the parts they need.”

“That does sound like fun. Are you going to let them fix it up, or are you going to want it put back stock?”

“I’d like to have it back stock, but I’m sure Ozzie won’t like that idea.”

“He won’t mind too much, as long as they have something to work on.”

“You’re probably right about that.”

The ramp came down, and we went to the house. Snitz was waiting on the porch. I leaned down, and scratched his ears. He looked kind of sad. I asked, “I went out today, and didn’t take you, didn’t I?”

He nodded. I replied, “I didn’t know it was going to turn into all day. Sorry.”

He smiled. We all went into the house. Tom was glad to see us. Julie said, “I think he was getting lonesome.”

I replied, “We got into a little more excitement than we thought we might.”

“I heard. Is everyone alright, Boss?”

“The Marines put a stop to it, before they even got out of their cars, Julie. Everyone is fine.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

“I’m glad it came out that way, too.”

It was close to bedtime for the younger kids, so I got that underway. Tom had found another book to read to us. The words were a little bigger, and Becky had to help him a couple of times, but he was making good progress. I kissed them all goodnight, and went to find Snitz.

We were patrolling the yard when my comm went off. I answered, “Admiral Wilson.”

Saucy said, “Boss, the President would like a word.”

“Put him through, Saucy.”

“Good evening, Admiral.”

“Good evening, Mr. President. What can I do for you this evening?”

“Well, I did want to thank you for all the outstanding warrants you closed a while ago. There wound up only being two of those folks we had to release.”

“You did check the trunks on those vehicles, didn’t you? I think they were pretty much all in possession of Class III weapons without the proper paperwork.”

“Since we didn’t actually see them with the weapons, and the ones we found were deactivated, to boot, the Attorney General doesn’t think we could get those charges to stick.”

“We’ll try and build him a better case, the next time something like that comes up.”

“Thanks for that. As I said, the majority of them had warrants, so it isn’t an issue.”

“I’m sure their lawyers will have them back on the street in no time.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that. I know that you were only delivering them to us, but the Attorney General thinks he can make the case in court that since they are known to have had dealings with BSR, we have to consider them flight risks, in the literal sense, and deny their bail.”

“That sounds wonderful, Mr. President.”

“I’m guessing we can deposit the bounty money into the usual account?”

“That would be fine, Mr. President. Pardon me for being a bit paranoid, but I have a hard time believing that you would take time out of your busy day to call and tell me all this. Was there something else you wanted to talk about?”

“The Chinese Ambassador is not happy about where you left his limo.”

“We dropped it right in the center of the helipad. I don’t think we could have gotten it any closer.”

“That’s what I heard. I think his issue is with the fact that you left it on top of the building at all, Admiral.”

“We would have had to drop it farther with the crane had we delivered it to ground level. More chance of damage, don’t you know?”

“That’s weak, Admiral. I take it you felt he deserved that, and more?”

“He showed up at a restaurant while I was eating, with a crew of organized crime types. The very ones you were so glad to receive, as a matter of fact. I took that as an unfriendly act.”

“I can see how you would. Since you both have diplomatic immunity, I don’t see where I would be able to intervene on either side of that sort of a dispute.”

“I’m glad to hear that, Mr. President. I’d hate for you to get in Dutch with your groundskeeper.”

“Is that a threat, Admiral?”

“No, just a statement of possibilities. We seem to be getting along well enough, and I’d rather not spoil it. I sincerely hope you are of a like mind.”

“I am. Do you expect to have more difficulties with the Ambassador?”

“That depends. Have the news helicopters found his limo?”

“Oh yes! It’s all over the local news.”

“I doubt he’s going to be a problem much longer, then. I would think he would be getting called to Beijing before long. Being publicly made a fool of isn’t in his job description, is it?”

“I wouldn’t think so, no. Do you expect the next fellow to be easier to get along with?”

I replied, “Well, Mr. President, that would depend on things that I don’t have any way to know, at the moment. If he was acting under the instructions of his superiors, then I would expect more trouble when the new fellow shows up. If he was trying to make a few dollars on the side, without the knowledge of his superiors, then I would expect the trouble to stop, at least for a while.”

“That seems logical. It’s always refreshing to speak with you, Admiral. You don’t bother to hide everything behind doublespeak.”

“So far, I haven’t been put in a position where that would be advantageous. It’s been easier to be up front, so far.”

“I do hope you don’t have to change your attitude about that.”

“As do I. Is there anything else you needed to discuss?”

“Not unless you would be willing to sell us some tech.”

“Get in touch with Xanadu, out of Arizona. I hear tell that Xander is just before making a few improvements on their product. Not as good as what the company uses, but it will beat the socks off a turbofan.”

“I’ll have someone look into that. Thank you, Admiral.”

“Any time, Mr. President. Have a good evening.”

“You too, Admiral.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. We went back into the house, and I made sure it was locked up. Snitz went in the kids’ room, and I got ready for bed.

When I snuggled in next to Nikki, she asked, “What took you so long? Your girlfriend come to visit?”

“Nope. The President called. I didn’t want to act like I was trying to get rid of him, when he’s not bothering us.”

“That was probably for the best. What did he want?”

“He thanked me for all those folks we dropped off, and then he mentioned that the Chinese Ambassador wasn’t overly happy with where we left his limo.”

“What did you tell him?”

“Well, he mentioned that the news choppers had already gotten good pictures of where the limo was sitting, so I told him I didn’t think that we needed to worry much about what this Ambassador thinks, but more about what the next fellow might have on his mind. He seemed to agree with that.”

“You think the Ambassador will get replaced, for getting embarrassed the way he was?”

“I would be surprised if he doesn’t. The Chinese place a great deal of stock in reputation, and he has damaged his, perhaps irreparably. I don’t think they will want him as their public face any longer.”

“Do you think they will do anything permanent to him?”

“I don’t know. I would think that he would be trying to get us to give him asylum, if he thought they were going to do anything like that.”

“You don’t think he would go to the American government, first?”

“That’s possible, but I don’t think he would have much confidence in their ability to keep him breathing.”

“What do you intend to do, if he asks?”

“I’m thinking a cabin on one of the islands on Zarathrustra would certainly be safe from his government, wouldn’t you?”

“I don’t think he would have the kind of life he’s used to in a place like that, Caveman.”

“No, I don’t suppose he would. That would be too bad, wouldn’t it?”

“You don’t like to be interrupted while you’re eating, do you?”

“Not by people with hostile intent, at least. Do you suppose we could talk about something else?”

“Oh, I think that could be arranged.”

Snitz was prompt, the next morning. I have to think that had something to do with leaving him home the day before. I got a cup of coffee from Ryder on the way out the door, and we patrolled the yard. There didn’t seem to have been much in the way of problems the night before, so he took care of business, and we went to sit on the porch. I was wondering just what I might get up to, today when Topper came around the corner of the house. I said, “Morning, Skipper.”

“Morning, Boss. I just wanted to let you know that Rick will be here a little later with a bunch of parts.”

“Grandpa’s Deuce is going to be quite a project?”

“It surely is. We had to buy new steel for everything. All those years in the woods didn’t do it a bit of good.”

“I’m guessing the engine is locked solid?”

“Couldn’t tell you that, Boss. Somebody took it and the transmission out, a long time ago. What do you want us to do about a drivetrain?”

“I’d like to go back as close to stock as we can. I’m guessing good flathead blocks are tough to come by?”

“Easier than you might think. One like what came out in that car, not so much, but a later engine wouldn’t be that bad, would it?”

“I don’t think so. Do the best you can. Let me know if the account gets low, and I’ll transfer some funds.”

“Max has it arranged so that the account stays between limits. If too much gets deposited, it gets transferred to your Commonwealth account, and if it gets low, money flows the other way. You don’t need to worry about it, Boss.”

“It’s going to take a while to get parts shipped in, isn’t it?”

“We’ve got all the sheet metal to build a new car coming in this morning. It’s just the drivetrain we’re still missing, and we can fly out to pick up those parts, easier than having them shipped.”

“Sounds like you have it well in hand. Sorry we haven’t found anything for you to fix up nice this trip.”

“Restoring the Deuce will be a new challenge, Boss. It sounds like fun.”

“Glad to hear it.”

“I brought up all the paperwork we found in the car. It doesn’t appear to amount to much.”

“I wasn’t expecting a lot. I don’t suppose you found other items hidden?”

“We found a couple, but we delivered them to Captain Sloan. He wasn’t sure he could get them fixed up to the point they could be used again, but he’s sure he can clean them up enough for display in the museum.”

“Were they too rusty to figure out exactly what they were?”

“One of them appeared to be a Savage automatic, like the one Fred carries. The other one, well, we’re just not sure what it was. Maybe Dingus could tell you.”

“I’m sure he’ll let me know, before long. Is there anything you need from me?”

“I can’t think of anything. I’d better get back to the shop.”

“No rush, is there?”

“We’ve got to get Dakota’s car over to John’s place, before time to wake him up.”

“I forgot all about him. I’m guessing I need to be over there, too.”

“The last I heard, you had time to eat breakfast, before he needed to wake up, Boss.”

“That’s good. Tell John I’ll be over there as soon as I get through.”

“Will do. Do you know how soon we’ll need to deliver that log truck?”

“No, I don’t. I’ll ask John, when I see him.”

“Thanks, but I can take care of it. I just thought you might have already asked.”

“Nope.”

“See you later, Boss.”

“See you, Skipper.”

He took off down the hill. Ryder came to the door, and said, “Breakfast is ready, Boss.”

“Thanks, Ryder. I’ll be right in.”

I went in the house, and asked, “Hey, Hon, I have some papers that I don’t have time to look at right now. Where do you think a good place to put them would be?”

“Do you have room in one of the safes?”

“I think there’s plenty of room in the small one. I’m not even sure what’s in the gun safe, these days.”

“I think that would be the best plan. Those documents are important, aren’t they?”

“I don’t have any idea, Hon. That’s why I want to go through them.”

I put the papers in the safe, and went to have breakfast. Nikki asked, “What are you up to, today?”

“Well, Topper reminded me that we were going to wake up that kid from the car we got out of the water today. I’d better be there for that, since we’re supposed to talk him into going by Julie’s, and applying for a job as a handyman. I’m guessing that isn’t going to be easy, since he isn’t going to be convinced that his epilepsy is cured.”

Janet said, “That does sound like a tall order.”

Milly said, “That’s why they need Tio. If it was easy, anybody could do it.”

I asked, “What was it you needed, Miles?”

“Oh, nothing much, Tio. I was wondering if my Toyota was still in storage aboard the Gene.”

“I haven’t heard any different. You tired of hitching rides, are you?”

“I am.”

“Get on the horn with Saucy. I’m sure he can get it out of storage and headed this way. Why did you think you needed my okay for that, anyway?”

“Seemed like the thing to do. I’m not sure.”

“I’m guessing you don’t have any place to keep it at the Academy?”

Nunya said, “Zoom isn’t crazy about having spaces that the students could wander into and find themselves with nothing to breathe.”

“It’s not any more dangerous than an airlock, is it?”

“I guess not. I’m not sure what her problem with it is.”

“I’ll ask her about it, when I get a chance. I’m thinking she probably said that when she thought she might have a problem with her help wanting to spend too much time dirtside. Now that she’s having to run you guys off, to keep you from burning out, she might have a different opinion.”

Milly asked, “You think that was why she was against it?”

“I don’t know, but it is the first reason that comes to mind.”

Nunya said, “That does sound more reasonable than just being hard core, now that you mention it.”

I replied, “Like I said, I don’t know for sure, but it sounds logical.”

Milly said, “Thanks, Tio.”

“No problem.”

I finished eating, and stood up. I asked, “Could I impose on some of you to help Ryder clean up? I need to head over to John’s.”

Janet said, “We can take care of it, Dad.”

Nikki asked, “Are you going to be gone all day again?”

“I don’t have any idea, Space Cadet. Could I call you later, when I figure it out?”

“That would be fine.”

I kissed her, and headed for the truck. Snitz fell in with me, and made it plain that I wasn’t going to leave him behind again. I opened the door, and said, “Okay then, jump in and let’s go.”

He got in, and lay on the seat. I got in, fastened my belt, and we headed for John’s. When we got to the barn, Dakota’s car was sitting out front, looking fresh with a new coat of paint. We went in, and John was waiting. He said, “I was going to call you, but Topper said you would be over.”

“He mentioned it to me this morning. How do you think he’s going to do?”

“The box says that it was able to cure the epilepsy, and a few other things he had going on. I have to think he’ll be a lot more able to deal with life than he was.”

“Good to hear. Do you think we’ll have much trouble convincing him of that?”

“I don’t think we’ll have to do much. I invited his girlfriend and her dad to come talk to him.”

“Good plan. I should have thought of that.”

“You’re on leave. You shouldn’t have to think of everything.”

“Thanks for that.”

Greg came around the corner, leading Lisa and her dad. I said, “Morning folks. This here is John Branham. He takes care of medical stuff for us. John, this is Lisa, and, ah crap, I failed to get your name, Sir.”

He said, “I wouldn’t worry about it. I didn’t offer it, either. I’m Randy Beeson.”

John said, “Nice to meet you both. Bob here never does worry much about names.”

Randy replied, “I’m thinking he might have a thing or two more important to worry about.”

John said, “Well, that’s true, but he was like that before we ever got started with all this.”

Lisa asked, “Is Dakota going to be okay?”

John says, “Well, that’s going to be your job. Convincing him that he is. The box fixed him up the best it could, so he’s not epileptic anymore, and there were a couple of other things it found wrong with him that it patched up. He should be as healthy as anybody else, now. I doubt he’s going to believe that, though. Do you think you can get through to him?”

“I don’t know, Sir. I’ll do my best.”

John said, “That’s all I can ask.”

Greg asked, “Did you need me for anything else, Dad?”

“Nope. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome, Dad.”

He took off.

Randy said, “He’s a good kid.”

John said, “Second best thing I ever did was adopting him.”

“Second best?”

“The best was marrying his mom.”

“That makes sense.”

We went into the room where the autodoc was. John looked over the controls, and said, “He’s ready to wake up. Lisa, you stand here, so that you’ll be the first thing he sees. I’ll start the machine waking him up.”

“Okay.”

John pushed the button to start the wakeup sequence, and we stood back while Lisa welcomed him back. Randy asked John, “Do you really think you got all his troubles fixed up?”

John replied, “Until the next time he ignores the maintenance on that heap of his.”

Dakota mumbled, “I keep it up as well as I can afford to.”

I replied, “Well, then, we’re gonna have to do something about your income.”

“I can’t work anyplace much. I have spells sometimes, even with the meds.”

John said, “Not anymore you don’t. What do you think you’re doing in that box?”

He looked around himself, and said, “I can’t afford anything like this. How am I going to pay you back?”

I looked at Randy. “I didn’t hear anybody mention money, did you?”

“Nossir, I can’t recall any mention of you folks wanting to get paid.”

Dakota said, “I can’t take this for free.”

I replied, “Oh, son, it ain’t free. You owe the company a favor to be named later.”

Randy said, “That’s a steep price, don’t you think?”

“Probably. It was the only way to shut him up, though.”

Randy thought a minute. “You’ve done this once or twice before, haven’t you?”

John said, “That we have.”

Dakota asked, “What about my car?”

I said, “If you don’t like what the band did with it, I’m sure they have time to go over it again.”

“The band?”

“The Allbot Brothers. You’ve heard of them, haven’t you?”

“Of course. Everybody has heard of the Allbot Brothers. You’re saying they fixed up my car?”

“I ain’t just sayin’ it. Get your buns out of that thing, and go look for yourself.”

Lisa stepped back, grinning. Dakota got out of the autodoc, and we pointed him in the right direction. When he got outside, he said, “This can’t be my car. My car never looked this good.”

I said, “Check the tag number, if you don’t believe us.”

He looked at the license plate, and said, “Yeah, that’s the right number, sure enough. What did you do? Buy a different car, and move the VIN tags?”

I said, “It’s the same car, whether you want to believe it or not.”

“Okay. I didn’t mean to offend.”

I replied, “This will cost you, though.”

“How much?”

“We’ve got a friend who owns a restaurant in town. She needs a handyman. You’re going to go apply for the job, straight from here. If she decides she wants to hire you, you’re going to do her a good job, for as long as you’re there. It wouldn’t do for me to hear you didn’t work out.”

I must have slipped into ‘Admiral voice’ in the middle there somewhere, because he looked shook. He said, “I can do that. What if I have a spell?”

John said, “I told you once, that isn’t going to happen any more. Now get. Do you know where Julie’s restaurant is?”

“I do.”

He got in the car, and headed out. Once he was gone, Lisa asked, “Are you guys really mad at him?”

I said, “No, we’re not. He was acting like he needed a kick in the butt, to get him started in the right direction. We did our best to provide it.”

Randy said, “I think you got your point across, Bob. Nicely done. I’ve been trying to get through to him for a while now, but I didn’t have the leverage you do.”

Lisa said, “It was all just a show, to get him to go apply for the job?”

John said, “Yes. That, and to make sure he does a good job for Julie. Right now, she comps all our meals. If we were to send her an employee who didn’t work out, we might have to start paying again.”

Randy asked, “She comps your meals? How did that come about?”

I said, “Well, we had a hand in getting her the money she used to buy the place. She seems to think that was a big deal.”

“I can see how she would. Is there anything else that we could do for you? I feel like you guys have done a lot for us, and we haven’t been able to pay you back, not even a little.”

“Well, I can’t think of anything we need, can you, John?”

John replied, “Well, you’ve already done us a pretty big service. The Boss there was getting bored, sitting around. You gave him something to do. It’s never good when he gets bored. Things come apart, one way or another.”

Randy laughed. “I like you fellas. If you ever need anything I can help with, let me know.”

I replied, “We will.”

He and Lisa headed toward their truck. When they were out of earshot, John asked, “Do you really think they will have anything we need?”

“I’m thinking we could do worse for neighbors, on Zarathrustra.”

“That’s a fact. I hadn’t thought of that. You’re thinking of opening it up for colonization?”

“Well, it’s never going to get any more like the kind of planet we’d like to settle on, if we don’t get some folks in there to civilize it.”

“That’s true. We get to pick the folks we haul out that way, so we might be able to keep the neighbors comfortable, at least for a while.”

“The Founding Fathers did a heck of a job on the Constitution, and it only really worked for a little over a hundred years. I don’t think we’re going to do much better than that. There are always going to be more stars, and more planets, though.”

“With the autodoc, we might live long enough to see that hundred years. Maybe even make sure that whatever government we set up doesn’t go off the tracks.”

“The only way that would happen, is if one of us was willing to be Emperor, and even that can go sideways, if you don’t pay enough attention. Look at what happened with the Squirrels.”

“I guess you’ve got a point there. Do you suppose we ought to see what kind of trouble we can stir up in town?”

“Might as well. If there are more folks wanting to give us a problem, we might as well go ahead and smoke them out, while we don’t have the kids with us.”

“That sounds like a plan.”

We went to the Sonoma, and I whistled up Snitz. He jumped in, and we followed him. John waved goodbye to Jane and Mary Anne. I was getting my keys out when my comm rang. I pulled it out, and answered, “Bob Wilson.”

Andre asked, “Hey, Boss. Did I get you at a bad time?”

“Not at all, Andre. What can I do for you?”

“Well, Dixie has one of the folks from that car wreck you helped with yesterday ready to head back dirtside. She says that the car that ran them off the road was definitely a cop car, and doesn’t want to talk to the police about it.”

“Well, it’s not going to get dealt with, if she doesn’t.”

“That’s what I told her, but she’s convinced that she’s going to get ‘disappeared’, if she goes in to give a statement. I wasn’t sure what I could tell her to get her to go ahead and do it.”

“Offer her a bodyguard while she’s with the police, and a place to stay on the ship until the case is resolved.”

“What if we have to pull out, Boss?”

“We’ll transfer her to whatever ship is pulling picket duty.”

“That sounds like as good a deal as she’s likely to get, Boss. I’ll see if she will go for it.”

“Thanks, Andre. Hey, while I’ve got you on the comm, how are Rachel and Rinky?”

“Rachel is happy as can be, and Rinky is doing great in school. She wants to work with Niner-Deuce, though. Rachel isn’t crazy about her starting that so young.”

“That sounds like a personal problem, Andre.”

“You’re right about that.”

“Take care of them, Andre.”

“Will do, Boss. Andre out.”

“Wilson out.”

I put the comm away. John said, “That sounded like work, Bob.”

“It did, didn’t it? Andre needed some advice about what he could offer the passenger from that crash we helped with.”

“Why does he need to offer her anything?”

“She says it was a cop car that caused the wreck, and she’s afraid to talk to the cops about it.”

“I can’t say I blame her too much, in that case. Do you think you ought to call Jack, and let him know what they’re going to be up against?”

“Might be a good idea.” I stopped in the driveway, and got my comm out again. I dialed Jack’s number. “Officer Conway, how may I help you today?”

“Jack, it’s Bob. Just wanted to let you know that the passenger from that wreck yesterday has woken up. She’s saying that it definitely was a police car that caused the accident. I don’t have any more details than that.”

“Well, the impound yard went over that vehicle, and didn’t find anything that would explain why they were being chased. No weapons, no drugs, nothing. We think we’ve found the car involved, but of course the officer it was signed out to at the time doesn’t know anything about it, and the dashcam was malfunctioning.”

“Is he going to be able to get away with that?”

“Unless we can come up with something more concrete, he very well might.”

“I don’t like the sound of that, Jack.”

“I’m not very fond of it, myself. Do you have a Bob plan, to remedy this state of affairs?”

“Not at the moment. John is with me, maybe he can come up with something.”

“I know what his first instinct is going to be. Don’t just sic your pet hacker on the officer in question, and call it good. We need this to be public, and by the book, so that no one else thinks that this kind of behavior is acceptable.”

“Understood, Jack. We’ll try and help, but with those rules of engagement, I’m not sure how much we’ll be able to do.”

“I understand, Bob. Are we going to be able to get a statement from this witness?”

“Andre is working on that for you. It’s looking like she’s not going to be willing to enter the police station without a bodyguard.”

“I’m assuming Andre is more than willing to provide her with one?”

“He is.”

“My boss isn’t going to like that, but he would like it less, if we couldn’t get that statement.”

“I’ll do what I can, Jack.”

“I know that, Bob. Thanks for calling.”

“You’re welcome. Be safe.”

“You too.”

I put the comm away, and said, “Jack doesn’t like their chances of pinning it on the fellow who caused the accident. They don’t have much in the way of physical evidence. His cruiser was definitely in a collision, but they don’t have anything to say for sure that it was the same collision.”

“His dashcam and bodycam mysteriously failed at the same time?”

“That seemed to be the case.”

“I could call the man who wasn’t there.”

“I know you could, and so does Jack. He asked that we not do it that way, so they could get something public, to dissuade anyone else who might be tempted to do things the way that fellow is doing them.”

“I see why he wants that, but I don’t see how we can make it happen for him.”

“I don’t either, but surely one of the bright people we have working for us will come up with something, don’t you think?”

“You’re going to call it a fleet problem?”

“I don’t think I can do that, but surely I could ask the fleet for assistance, if anyone has a good idea.”

“That does sound more like it would fly. As tempting as it is, we don’t want the fleet to become a personal vendetta service.”

“That wouldn’t do at all. I might as well declare myself ‘Emperor Bob’, if we’re going to go down that road.”

“As much as you might be the best one for that job, I don’t think that’s where we want to go.”

“I know it’s not where I want to go. Talking with Natti since he took the throne is enough to convince me of that. He doesn’t sound as happy as he used to.”

“I don’t think it’s a job designed to make a person happy.”

“I don’t either. What did you have in mind for today?”

“I can’t think of anything, really. I was hoping you had some more old business to look into.”

“I suppose we could go by the history museum, and see if they have anything from the bootlegging period. I might be able to find out more about Grandpa there.”

“You haven’t been in there to check up on him yet?”

“You forget. I didn’t find out about just who he was, until we were already hip deep in fleet business.”

“That’s right. You didn’t even know he was a revenuer, did you?”

“Nope.”

“Do you think the band is going to be able to fix up that car we found?”

“Topper seems to think so. He told me he had a bunch of parts for it coming in this morning, and they were going to fly out after some more today.”

“Were they able to use anything out of the original?”

“Not that I’ve heard about so far. It was too far gone. Good thing there are plenty of reproduction parts.”

“That’s for sure.”

We pulled into the history museum. Snitz was not psyched about having to stay in the truck, but we rolled the windows down part way, and left him some water. I had taken to carrying a foldable dish in the truck, for just such occasions. We went in, and bought tickets at the counter. The clerk was very nice. It wasn’t until we got inside that the curator recognized me. He stammered, “Aren’t you that Bob Wilson fellow?”

“I am. Yes, I am the same gent who bought that watch you didn’t have any use for. As far as I’m concerned, that’s in the past. Do you have a different idea?”

“No, of course not. Enjoy the museum.”

“I do have a question, if it isn’t too much bother.”

“No bother at all. What do you need to know?”

“Do you have much on the history of bootlegging in the area? In particular, I’m looking for information on a Revenuer by the name of Bob Hailey. He was my grandpa.”

“All the exhibits we have on that period are in that room there. The name Bob Hailey doesn’t ring any bells, though.”

“Thanks all the same.”

We went and looked at what they had, and the curator had been right, there wasn’t anything about Grandpa displayed. I had a fleeting thought to ask about what they might have stashed in the back, since that seemed to be where they kept all the really interesting stuff, but I figured we had given the curator enough of a shock. I said, “I guess we might as well head out, John. I’m not seeing anything about him here.”

“Neither am I. This was a burnt run.”

We were nearly to the door when the curator stopped us. “Mr. Wilson, you got me curious, so I did some checking in the storage area. I have to say I feel remiss in not having more to display about your grandfather. All I found were some references to his disappearance in the newspapers. We digitized those, for easier searching.”

“I see. Thanks for taking the time, all the same. I’ve been trying to piece together his story, but so far, I haven’t had much luck.”

“No offense, but there doesn’t seem to have been much interest in finding out what happened to him at the time.”

“I don’t doubt that a bit. My main goal is to find out why he thought it was a good idea to head into the woods alone. I would have thought he would have sense enough to take some kind of backup.”

“You’re saying you think he was killed?”

“That seems to be the way the evidence is leading me.”

“I see. Sorry I couldn’t be more help.”

“No problem. Thanks again for trying.”

John and I left. John asked, “You didn’t tell him that you know for sure he was killed. Why is that?”

“Well, that would mean a lot of people wanting to go over our findings, and I don’t need all of this crap dredged up in the newspapers. I just want to know for myself.”

“I’m not sure why it’s a big deal to you, Bob.”

“I think I’m afraid I might have the same character flaw that sent Grandpa into the woods without enough backup. I would need to keep an eye on something like that, to keep from putting the fleet in danger.”

“That makes sense. I’ve been watching you since we started the company. I’ve yet to see you do anything that would put us in danger, just to prove how tough you are. I don’t think that’s something you have to worry about, but I can see where it would wear on your mind.”

“You really think I have a handle on things?”

“I think you do, or I would have said something before now.”

“Thanks. Let’s talk about something nicer. When do we get to wake up those loggers, and their mules?”

“The last I heard, they’ll be ready to wake up tomorrow morning.”

“I wonder where they will want to be delivered?”

“We could always take them back to Julie’s.”

I said, “That might be as good as any. I guess we could ask the one fella’s niece, she might have some idea.”

“Now you’re talking. We probably ought to see how young Dakota came out with his interview, anyway.”

“Probably should. I hope he didn’t turn out to have his head wedged.”

“I doubt it. Randy wouldn’t put up with somebody like that sniffing around Lisa, would he?”

“No, I doubt that he would.”

We went to the restaurant. Julie met us out front. “I might let that cute fella you got riding with you in, but I’m not sure about you two troublemakers.”

John asked, “What kind of trouble have we made for you lately? There hasn’t been any gunplay in a week or better.”

I said, “It sounds kinda weak, when you put it that way, John.”

“It does, doesn’t it?”

Julie said, “It’s too early for lunch. What are you two doing here, anyway?”

I asked, “How did Dakota do on his interview?”

“He’s got the skills. He sure doesn’t believe you cured his epilepsy, John.”

John replied, “I’m not surprised, but surely he’ll figure it out, after a while.”

“I told him he could work here, one way or the other, as long as he got the work done well and on time. That seemed to settle him down.”

I said, “Glad to hear it. He needs a steady income.”

“Why is that?”

“He’s got a ring to save for.”

“I see. That should make him more reliable.”

John said, “I would think so.”

Julie asked, “I could have told you that much over the phone. I’m thinking there’s another reason you two have darkened my door.”

I said, “Well, Hanns and his partner are supposed to wake up in the morning, and we didn’t ask them where they might want to be dropped when they did wake up. Is his niece working today?”

“She is. Hang on one.”

She stuck her head in the door, and said, “Johnna, could you step out here for a minute?”

She came outside and saw us, she asked, “What’s wrong? Did something go wrong with my uncle?”

John said, “I just checked in, and he’s doing fine. He’ll be ready to come back in the morning. We just needed to know where he might want to be dropped off.”

“I’m not sure just where they were working. You’ll have to ask them once they’re awake.”

I replied, “Thanks anyway. That shouldn’t be too much of a problem.”

Julie asked, “Did you guys need anything else?”

John said, “Not that I’m thinking of right now. Would it be alright if we came back by for lunch?”

“You two are always welcome, you know that.”

We got back in the truck, and headed out. John asked, “Where to now?”

“I’m not thinking of anything, are you?”

“Nope. I guess we might as well head back to the Holler.”

I started us that way, half expecting something to come up before we got there. I dropped John off at his place, and went back to the house. Snitz and I got out of the truck, and headed for the house. When we got there, Nikki said, “I didn’t expect to see you back so soon.”

“I didn’t expect to be back so soon. John and I couldn’t come up with anything to do in town, so we came back. I think I’m going to get those papers out of the safe, and see if I can learn anything.”

“Do you mind if I look at them with you?”

“Of course not. An extra pair of eyes would be great. Did the girls head out?”

“They did. Milly’s truck got here, and she wanted to drive it.”

“Sounds about right.”

I got the papers out of the safe, and we sat at the kitchen table trying to figure them out. We didn’t find much. Nikki said, “Rick was by earlier. What is the band working on? He had a load of stuff for them.”

“Grandpa’s car was too rusted to do much with. They’re going to have to rebuild it with new parts.”

“They had to buy a whole new body?”

“They did. The motor and transmission were missing out of it, too. Topper thinks he can find the parts he needs to build a motor for it. He didn’t mention what they’re planning to do about a transmission.”

“I’m sure it will be great, knowing that bunch.”

“Yep.”

We got to the end of the papers, and didn’t find anything that would shed any light on just why Grandpa thought he could go after moonshiners all by himself. I was really beginning to think there was something more to all of this, but I was out of ideas for how to find out. I asked, “Does this mess make you think that we’re missing something big?”

“Well, Caveman, it sure looks like there’s a key missing that would open the whole mess up for us. Do you think your mom could shed any light on things?’

“I don’t know.” I got out my comm, and put it on speaker. Then I called Mom. Mark answered, “Hello?”

I replied, “Mark, it’s Bob. Is Mom handy?”

“She will be in a minute. She’s busy at the moment. How are things?”

“Going pretty well, I guess. We’re taking leave on Earth, at the moment.”

“You must have found something that you think your mother will know something about.”

“Well, yeah. I guess I’m predictable, huh?”

“A little. I wouldn’t worry about it, if I were you. Here she is.”

Mom came on the line. I could hear her ask who was calling. She said, “Bob! Is everyone okay?”

“Everyone is fine, Mom. Nikki is over her morning sickness, so she’s feeling a lot better.”

“Nikki’s pregnant again? I did tell you what causes that, didn’t I?”

“Yes, Mom, you did. We thought we had it under control. It turns out that Commonwealth contraceptive implants aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. John is working on improving them.”

“You don’t have to answer all my questions before I can get them out, Bob.”

“It makes things simpler for me.”

“But you’re spoiling all my fun!”

“You’ll get over it. How often are you flying over to take care of Little Ruth?”

“A couple of evenings a week. I’ve yet to convince them that she needs to stay the weekend at Nana’s, though.”

“You’ll get it. I have faith in you.”

“I’m not sure if that’s a compliment, the way it sounded.”

“That’s odd.”

“I know you had something to ask me about, besides just shooting the breeze, Bob. You might as well go ahead and spill it. You’re not fooling anybody.”

“Well, then. We found your dad’s old Ford. The band is working on putting it back on the road.”

“That’s great news! Thanks for telling me. Are you going to bring it with you the next time you come out this way? I only got to ride in it a few times before he came up missing.”

“We can do that. That’s pretty much what I was calling about. Do you remember anything about when he didn’t come home?”

“Not much. That car was still brand new. He had only had it a few months.”

“How was he able to afford a new car on a government salary?”

“I never thought about that. Surely you don’t think he was dirty, do you?”

“He had some nice weapons, and a new car. It seems like he was coming up with a lot of money somewhere.”

“Now that you mention it, Mom didn’t have to worry about a house payment, after he died. I figured we had a loan, like my friends from school, but Mom said our place was paid off.”

“I can’t say I like the sound of that, Mom.”

“Now that I think about it, I don’t either.”

“I’ll keep looking into it, but so far it doesn’t look like there is going to be much to find.”

“You keep coming up with bits and pieces, sooner or later there will be enough to build a picture of what he was up to.”

“I just hope we wind up liking what we find.”

“It is what it is, Bob. We won’t be able to change it now.”

“You’re right, Mom. Thanks for talking about it.”

“You’re welcome, Bob. Tell Nikki and the kids I said ‘hi’.”

“Will do, Mom. Be safe.”

“You too.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. Nikki said, “Well, that didn’t do anything but raise more questions.”

“No, it didn’t.”

We heard Sunshine pulling into the yard, and went to the door to greet Dingus. I said, “Come on in.”

He did, and we all sat at the kitchen table. He saw the papers we had spread out, and asked, “What’s all this?”

I replied, “John and I found my Grandpa’s car yesterday. These are the papers out of it.”

“Learn much?”

“No, not really. The more I hear, the more it sounds like he was on the take, though.”

“Why do you say that?”

“He was driving a brand-new car, and carrying a Colt Monitor. Neither of those were cheap. Not to mention that the house he was living in was paid off.”

“None of that sounds good, sure enough.”

“I shouldn’t have gone snooping, if I was afraid of what I might find.”

“I guess so, but it still has to burn a little.”

“It does. Until I started looking into things, all I had to go on were Mom’s stories, and of course her mom only told her the good parts.”

“That’s what you would expect.”

“Yes, it is. I’m guessing you came over for a reason.”

“I was wanting to ask you about what to do with those guns that the band dropped over at the house.”

“How bad off are they?”

“I think I’m going to have to let Scotti restore some of the parts, if they’re ever going to fire again. You might be better off to just clean them up and put them in the museum.”

“I heard about the Savage. What did the other one turn out to be?”

“A sawed-off double twelve. It has the short chambers, like that old gun of Richard’s.”

“I can’t think of any reason I would need to shoot either one of them, Dingus. Clean ‘em up, and send ‘em to Jackie.”

“That’s what I figured you would say, but I wanted to make sure. I’ve still got the rest of those papers out of the chimney. Do you think there might be anything in there that would shed light on your grandpa?”

“I don’t know. If you want to bring them over, we could have a look.”

“Oh, I couldn’t do that, Bob. Phillus has been looking for a project. I’ll let her deal with it. You’re supposed to be taking it easy.”

“If you think so.”

“I surely do.”

“What are you up to? John and I went out looking for mischief to get into this morning, and didn’t find a thing.”

“That has to be a bad sign, if you and John couldn’t find any mischief to get up to. I know you boys better than that.”

Nikki said, “You don’t suppose things are finally settling out, do you?”

Dingus looked at me, seriously. He asked, “She didn’t say that out loud, did she?”

“I thought I heard it too, Dingus. The Marines have us covered, I don’t know what else we could do in the way of security.”

“I don’t either. I designed the air cover with Scotti, and nothing is going to get through that, without a lot of work. We have plenty of Marines in the Holler to deal with a ground attack. I don’t know what she just called down, but I have to think that we’re as prepared as we’re going to get.”

Nikki said, “Do you really think I messed up that badly?”

I replied, “It has been awfully quiet, the last few days.”

“What do you think is going to happen?”

“I don’t know that, or I would be ordering people to prepare for it. It could be scout reports coming in from the other side of the Empire, or any number of other things. It could be that our shepherd is going to let us stew for a few days before we get to find out what’s going on. No way to tell.”

“And you think it was all my fault?”

Dingus said, “We have to blame somebody, don’t we?”

Nikki replied, “I suppose.”

I said, “You would think we were sick, if we didn’t.”

“I guess you’re right about that.”

Gus asked, “Hey, Dad, do you want to go driving, if you don’t have anything else to do?”

“Sounds like fun. Give me a minute to clean this mess up, and I’ll be right with you.”

Nikki said, “I can put this stuff back into the safe, Caveman. Go have fun.”

“If you insist. Good to see you, Dingus. Sorry I need to rush off.”

“Don’t worry about it. Go spend time with your son, while you can.”

Gus and I took off for the pasture. We made a few laps, and John’s side-by-side started across the pasture. They made it through the gate, and came to join the fun. Greg was driving, and John was along for the ride. We had a big time, until we had to go home for lunch. John and Greg waved, as they headed back to their place. We went back to the house, and got cleaned up.  I commed Julie to tell her we weren’t going to make it back for lunch.

Gus helped me make us all some lunch, and then we cleaned up. He asked, “What do you want to do this afternoon, Dad?”

“I dunno. Do you have any planes with you?”

“Well, yes, I do. Do you want to fly?”

“I think it’s a pretty good day for it, don’t you?”

“There’s not much wind. We probably ought to take advantage of the good weather, while we’ve got it.”

“Just what I was thinking.”

We carried all his flying stuff out to the field. He said, “I’ve got a new one I want to try out, Dad.”

“What’s different about it?”

“It’s electric, instead of using rubber for a motor.”

“What kind of battery does it use?”

“That’s the trick, Dad. Scotti let me use one of her supercapacitors. Lighter than a battery, and it will put out more juice.”

“Does it last very long?”

“As long as a rubber band, anyway. I put in a little computer that can tell if it’s going up or down. As long as it’s catching a thermal and headed up, it doesn’t use the motor. It can even charge up a little, from the prop turning. When it starts back down, the motor kicks in, and pulls it back up.”

“Sounds great. How does it work?”

“I’ve only flown it at the park on the Gene, so far. There’s not much for thermals in there. I have high hopes, though.”

“Let’s see what it can do.”

He charged up the plane, and let it go. It got pretty high up, and then started conserving its power. Gus said, “I think it will be up there for a while. We might as well wind some of the older stuff, and fly it, while we’re waiting for that one to run out of power.”

I helped him wind another plane, and he launched it. It went nearly as high as the electric, but it couldn’t hold its altitude nearly as well. It started back down. We flew a couple more, before the electric started to lose altitude. Gus had given it enough smarts to come right back to where it was launched. I said, “That’s pretty impressive, Son.”

“I don’t know, Dad. Sure, it flies well, and stays up a long time, but there’s not as much excitement to it. With the rubber, you’re never quite sure what’s going to happen, when you let go of the plane. That one has enough smarts to take care of pretty much whatever happens, and fly the way it’s supposed to, even if the wind tries to mess it up. It just isn’t as interesting. Building it was fun, though.”

“At least you got some fun out of it. I’m wondering if you couldn’t change the wing covering to something clear, and build yourself a stealth drone.”

“Scotti said that too, when she saw it. I think she might be working something up, but I’m not sure about it.”

“You never can tell. You might have designed the new scout drone for the fleet.”

“I doubt that, Dad. The regular ones can do a lot of things that something like this can’t. This one only has enough weight margin to carry one sensor, instead of a whole set of them.”

“You might be right. On the other hand, it might just be a challenge for the Funny Papers to figure out lighter sensors, that this thing can carry.”

“You think they could do that, Dad?”

“They’re the Funny Papers. You know there’s no telling what they might come up with.”

“True enough, I guess. I would still think that the stray noise from running the electric motor would make it easier to spot.”

“You could be right about that. I guess that means you need to work on making a motor that doesn’t give off stray radiation, don’t you?”

“How would I do that?”

“I dunno. Surely there’s some way to keep all the electrical noise inside the motor.”

“I’ve never heard of anything like that, Dad.”

“Well, then. A whole new field of research for you to work on.”

“I don’t know if I’m smart enough to figure out something like that, Dad.”

“What are you talking about? You’re the leading researcher for this stuff.”

“I’m the only researcher. That’s different.”

“No, you’re the leading researcher. Look around. You’re out standing in your field, ain’t you?”

“OUCH! You went to all that trouble for a bad joke?”

“Not really, but the opportunity was there. It would have been a shame to waste it, wouldn’t you think?”

“I guess.”

We flew the rest of the afternoon, and then we picked everything up, and headed back to the house.

When we got there, Nikki asked, “Would you mind if we had a few people over tonight?”

“I guess not. What’s the occasion?”

“No occasion, really. It’s just been a few days since the last time we got together. Andre is okay to come down and cook for us.”

“So all I have to do is sit in the shade and drink beer? I think I can handle that.”

“You know and I know it won’t be that simple. Everyone who shows up is going to have something they want to talk to you about.”

“You’re probably right about that. Maybe I should print up some flyers. ‘I don’t know when we’re heading back to the black. I don’t know where the next deployment will be, or what it will be about. I doubt it will be much longer before we go. If you think your project is worth doing, it probably is. Send a proposal to my inbox, and I’ll have a look at it, when I’m back at work.’ Does that sound like it would answer most of their questions?”

“I have to think that most of them would think that their particular problem was a special case, and they really need your opinion, even though it seems to be covered in the flyer.”

“You’re probably right about that, but a guy can dream, can’t he?”

“Dream all you want, just don’t get too sloshed to answer questions.”

“I’m not sure I can anymore, even if I wanted to. John changed a lot, while I was in the box.”

“I know that, Caveman. That doesn’t mean you need to test the limits, does it?”

“I suppose not.”

I set up some chairs out back under the shade trees. It wasn’t all that long before people started showing up. Andre barely had his grills set up before Richard and Susie showed up with a ginormous cooler in the back of their truck. It was beginning to look to me like we were going to have more than a few people over for supper. I began to wonder just what Nikki had up her sleeve, but I figured whatever it was, it would turn out alright. John and company pulled in. I carried Mary Anne around on my head for a while, but she decided she wanted to go in and play with Tom. John and I went around back, and found chairs. Greg asked, “Can I sit with you guys, until Uncle Dingus shows up?”

John said, “No problem. Just remember which part of the cooler you’re allowed in.”

“Yes, Dad. I don’t want Uncle Bob to tell Pete that he’s not pushing me hard enough.”

I asked, “You mean your dad wouldn’t do that for you?”

“No, he would. It would just carry more weight, coming from you.”

We heard Sunshine pull into the yard. Greg stood up and grabbed his helmet. I wondered if he or Gus would get there first. When he was out of earshot, I asked, “Is he still thirsty?”

“Not as bad as he was. Puberty should kick in any time now, and I’ll be able to put him back in the box and get it fixed for good.”

“Does he ever hear from his biological dad?”

“He got a birthday card.”

“It’s got to be rough, having somebody just not care anymore than that.”

“We keep him busy enough that he doesn’t have much time to think about it. It still bothers him, once in a while, though.”

“You’re doing a good job, John. He’s not going to be able to forget that he had another dad, just like that.”

“I know. Actually, he’s doing better with it than I expected. I have to wonder if that has something to do with being on a ship, instead of being in school with other kids who would pick on him about it.”

“I have to think that a starship is a better place for a kid to grow up than a public school.”

“I would agree with that.”

Bill Matthews came around the corner of the house. He said, “If you two are agreeing on something, I’d better go home and put some plywood over the windows. It’s fixin’ to get rough.”

I replied, “It’s not that bad, Bill. Come and have a seat.”

John asked, “How have things been around here, Bill?”

“Quiet, mostly. Everybody seems to have figured out that messing with the Holler isn’t a good idea.”

I said, “Glad to hear that. For a while there, it was getting entirely too interesting.”

John said, “That’s for sure.”

Bill said, “One thing I was going to ask about.”

I replied, “Here it comes. What can we do for you, Bill?”

“You’ve got it backwards. There are a lot of woods in the Holler.”

I said, “I’ve noticed that. Are you wanting to clear the land, so you can get a better crop of hay?”

“No, nothing like that. It’s just that I’m seeing a lot of good, mature trees out there that we could sell for a good profit.”

“I see what you mean. I wouldn’t want to clear cut, though, and getting the good trees out would be a bear, if we were going to leave the younger stuff.”

“There are still a few fellas around that go into the woods with a saw and a team, and bring out the trees one at a time.”

“I met one of those fellas the other day. Are you saying I should try and hire him to thin out the woods in the Holler?”

“I think it might be a good idea. You don’t want dead trees out there, just waiting for lightning to start them burning.”

“That wouldn’t be good. I’ll speak with Hanns about it in the morning.”

“You know Hanns?”

“Not really. He asked me to put his team in the box, and we wound up taking care of him and his partner too. While we were at it, the band went through his truck.”

“Really?”

I pointed down the hill, to where the truck was sitting outside the shop. Bill looked more closely, and said, “That’s his truck, sure enough. I wouldn’t have recognized it, with a better coat of paint.”

“You wouldn’t expect Topper to let it out of the shop without touching it up a little, would you?”

“No, I don’t suppose I would.”

“Did you say he asked you to put his team in the box?”

“He did.”

John said, “We had some oversize units, from taking care of the cattle we shipped out. The mules fit just fine.”

“How about that. You boys always have the answer, don’t you?”

I said, “Not always, but often enough to get by.”

Bill replied, “Listen at him. Trying to sound humble and all. Do you let him get away with that, John?”

“Not as often as he would like, that’s for sure.”

Nicole came around the corner of the house. “Hey, Boss! How’s it going?”

“I’m doing alright. How about yourself?”

“I can’t complain. I seem to be running a puppy mill, but I don’t have any trouble getting rid of them.”

“Is that right?”

“Every time Mr. Sloan sends a ship to Charlie’s, he calls and asks if I have any puppies to send.”

“Sounds like Canni is taking care of business.”

“He’s brought home enough girlfriends to make it a steady thing.”

“As long as you’re staying busy. Sure you don’t want to take another long cruise on a ship with no artificial gravity?”

“No thanks, unless we just have to. I thought the one trip was enough.”

“It was, I’m just giving you a hard time. Have a seat, we’ve got plenty of beer.”

“No thanks. I’ll go hang with the ladies. Just thought I ought to say ‘hi’.”

“Thanks for that. I’ve been wondering how you were getting along.”

“We’re doing fine.”

She headed back around the house. Bill said, “I guess I’m not up on current events. Why would you take a long trip on a ship with no gravity, Bob?”

“That was the way to get the Commonwealth to leave Earth alone. That’s why we can work out in the open nowadays. They have a rule that you have to go to their seat of government in a ship of native manufacture. None of our fellows were good enough to get artificial gravity in the time we had to get the ship flying.”

“I see. That was why you built that big building back there, that I’m storing hay in, wasn’t it?”

“It sure was. We didn’t want to work on it outside the Holler, where the government could come around and steal all our ideas.”

“That wouldn’t be good. You fellas have managed to do good with what you have. I don’t think they would have that kind of luck.”

“If one country got our tech, the others would all think they needed it too, and that would be a mess. That’s why we’ve tried to give as little as we could to any of them.”

“That’s probably for the best.”

Rachel came around the corner of the house. I said, “Hey, Rachel. How are things?”

“Oh, Andre and I are having a great time. I’ve found a job on the Gene, and I’m really enjoying it. Rinky is going to school, and having a lot of fun with the other kids.”

“Somebody remind me to give Janice hazardous duty pay.”

Rachel replied, “They’re not that bad. Actually, we’re thinking about adopting another one.”

John said, “Have you been to the Academy? There might be someone there who needs a home.”

Rachel replied, “We went by there, but it seems that all those kids are happy learning things so that they can grow up and work for ‘Uncle Bob’.”

Bill said, “I’m not surprised. It seems to be a pretty good job, from what I’ve seen.”

“You’re not an employee?”

“No Ma’am. I work with the company, but not for the company.”

I said, “Bill here cuts all the hay in the Holler, when we’re not around to take care of it. We were just talking about him taking over managing the woods, too.”

“Oh, I see.” She got hit with a stream of water. She jumped, and said, “That ornery bot! Apparently I need to go straighten out my husband. Nice talking to you fellas.”

She went over and read Andre the riot act. Bill asked, “Did she say husband?”

John asked, “She did. Rescue a woman out of a burning building, and she falls in love. Who would have thought?”

I said, “They were acquainted, before that happened, John.”

“I know that. I still think that was the clincher.”

“You very well could be right about that.”

Bill said, “Why do I get the feeling that you boys are leaving out the good parts?”

I replied, “I couldn’t tell you that, Bill. What do you want to know?”

“Oh, for starters, just how that pretty lady came to be in a burning building in the first place.”

“That one’s easy. She used to be a firefighter.”

Bill said, “Back up. She was a firefighter, and got trapped in a building. Then Andre, the cook, ran in and saved her?”

John said, “As I recall, it was more along the lines of he swooped in like an avenging angel, but close enough, I guess.”

I added, “By the time he got to her, she needed a while in the box to get healthy again.”

“So he saved her life?”

John said, “He did. Hers, and her team’s. She and her second had lain on top of the others, to try and keep them alive until help could get to them. She was in bad shape.”

Bill said, “I need to learn not to take people for granted, when I’m in the Holler. I never would have thought she was anything like that tough.”

I said, “She’s good people.”

“I really haven’t met anybody at one of these who ain’t, Bob.”

John said, “We try to hire good people. I’m surprised Bob hasn’t tried to hire you.”

“He has. I like it here too much to go wandering around the stars in a tin box.”

“Fair enough.”

Susie and Richard came around the corner of the house. Susie was carrying the baby. Richard said, “There’s somebody you fellas need to meet.”

We stood up, to get a better look at the little fella. Anyway, the baby was wearing blue, so I figured it was a boy. Susie said, “Bob Wilson, John Branham, I’d like you to meet Johnathon Martin Collins.”

Richard said, “I know it’s not exactly right, but neither one of us was willing to name him Marion.”

I replied, “I think that’s plenty close enough. Thanks.”

John said, “Yes, thanks. It’s an honor.”

Susie replied, “No more than you deserve. You saved my life, and passed on a good opportunity to shoot his silly behind.”

I said, “You’ve already more than paid us back for that, with those pemmican bars you sell us. They’re way better than the flavored cardboard we used to get.”

“Mom and Dad are getting well paid for those, and you know it. I’m just scared they are going to decide to retire, and then I’ll have to take the place over. That’s more responsibility than I want.”

I replied, “Responsibility has a way of sneaking up on you, whether you want it, or not.”

John said, “That’s for sure.”

Richard and Susie went to show off young John to the rest of the folks. John said, “They seem to be doing well.”

“Did you ever talk Richard into trying for more than CNA?”

“We got him certified as an EMT, and he’s taking courses for LPN.”

“He didn’t want to go for Paramedic?”

“He would rather take care of people in a home, where he has some idea what the next day is going to be like, rather than go into a totally new situation every shift.”

“I can see how he would prefer that. Novelty is nice and all, but it can get tiring.”

“Sure enough.”

Henry Otis came around the corner. John said, “Hey, Henry.”

“Hello. How are you fellows this evening?”

I replied, “Doing pretty well, I think. I need to thank you for setting up that arrangement with the pawn shop in town. Made things a lot handier.”

“I heard you had found a couple of things you wanted. I would have thought Nunya and Jackie would be able to build anything you might want.”

“I’m sure they could. It just happened that these particular weapons used to belong to my grandpa.”

“So it was sentimental value you were after?”

“I suppose so.”

“Were you able to learn any more about him?”

“I know you’re the company’s lawyer. Are you my lawyer as well?”

“I’m not sure about that, Bob.”

I got a Bob out of my pocket, and flipped it to him. “Will that work for a retainer?”

“It surely will. What do you need lawyer-client privilege for?”

“Some of the bots snuck into the pawn shop with remotes, and examined their confidential records.”

“I figured that was what happened. Was the person who sold the weapons able to tell you much?”

“We found the car that Grandpa was driving when he disappeared, but it didn’t have much in the way of evidence in it.”

“What are you thinking happened to your grandfather?”

“The more I look into it, the more it appears he was on the take, and fell out with the bootleggers who were paying him.”

“Why do you say that?”

“He seemed to have a lot more money than his government salary would account for.”

John asked, “Wouldn’t he have been more careful than to spend it on things that people could easily see he couldn’t afford?”

I replied, “You would think so, but his house was paid off, and he was driving a brand-new Ford. Not to mention all the high-dollar weapons he carried.”

Henry replied, “I can see how you would get the idea that he was bent, Bob. You don’t think there could be another explanation?”

“I’m sure there could be, but right at the moment, I’m having trouble figuring out what it might be.”

John said, “We didn’t dig into it too deeply, but we weren’t able to find much in the way of records that might shed light on the situation.”

Henry asked, “Would it be acceptable if I looked into it for you?”

I said, “I don’t see why not. You have resources you don’t think we have access to?”

“I have several acquaintances who might have access to records from that time.”

“You think there might exist records of what was up with Grandpa?”

“I wouldn’t want to promise you anything, Bob. I can check into it, though.”

“Thanks.”

Andre called us to supper, and there was a minor fracas. It seems young John didn’t want Sergeant Harrow to give him back to his mother. He had found a walking, talking teddy bear, and he didn’t want to give it up. Once he figured out that Mom was the one with the lunch counter, he changed his tune. We all found seats. Dingus and I did the blessings, and we all dug in. I did notice Brook sitting next to Milly, but I figured if I had a need to know, I would find out soon enough. Nikki noticed me looking down at my comm. She said, “Just because you’re relaxing, that doesn’t mean it’s going to ring, Caveman.”

“I suppose not, but isn’t it the way to bet?”

“I can see why you would think that way, at least.”

We did manage to make it through supper before my comm rang. I answered, “Admiral Wilson.”

“Boss, it’s Johnny. I took a fleet action, and I thought you might want to know.”

“Thanks for keeping me updated, Johnny. What did you have to do?”

“The Chinese Ambassador who came to see you with all the armed help was being put on a plane back to China at gunpoint. I assumed you wouldn’t want to be responsible for whatever might happen to him when he got there, so I had the Marines rescue him from his captors. He doesn’t have a family, so we don’t need to worry about his dependents. He’s in a security suite on the Gene. I didn’t think you would want him in the brig.”

“What I want, and what are best for the future of the fleet are two different things. I don’t suppose he has bothered to say anything, as of yet, has he?”

“When he woke up, he copiously thanked the Marines who were escorting him. It’s a shame they had all had training in cold reading, and figured out that he wasn’t being truthful.”

“I thought Steve’s training wasn’t reliable with a Chinese subject.”

“It wasn’t, but we’ve done a lot of research, and managed to come up with ways to make it reliable. There’s a training course available, if you think you might need it.”

“It might be wise for me to take it. We seem to be destined to have to deal with people from that part of the world.”

“Whatever you think, Boss.”

“Did you need anything else, Johnny?”

“I can’t think of anything. Fly safe, Boss.”

“Fly safe, Johnny.”

John asked, “What was that all about?”

“You’re rubbing off on your XO. He decided to keep the Chinese Ambassador from getting hurt.”

“How’s that?”

“Seems the Ambassador was being escorted to a plane, scheduled to take him back to China. The escorts seemed to be more interested in making sure that he didn’t make other arrangements, than they were in his safety.”

“Johnny thought his life expectancy would be negligible, once he arrived in China?”

“That seemed to be what he was thinking. He didn’t think I would want to be responsible for that.”

“That’s what I would have thought, as well. Were we wrong?”

“Nope. If I had wanted him dead, I would have pushed the button on the airlock myself.”

Oleta heard me say that. She asked, “Do you have to do that often, Admiral?”

“No, I do not. We continually improve our recruitment interviews, so that it doesn’t happen again. It has a bad effect on the Admiral’s state of mind, I’ve been told.”

“I can see how it would.”

She wandered off to talk to someone else. John said, “I don’t think that was the answer she expected, Bob.”

“It was the truth. Should I have lied to her?”

“I don’t see why. Are you still thinking about hiring her?”

“I’m waiting to see if she manages to decide whether she wants to ask for a job, or not. I’ve not seen any skills she has that the company particularly needs, so I’m not willing to go out of my way to hire her. On the other hand, I haven’t seen any reason I wouldn’t want to ship out with her, so if she were to ask, I would find a job for her.”

“That sounds fair.”

Sergeant Harrow wandered over. I said, “I saw you earlier with young John. He seemed to take a liking to you.”

“That he did, Boss. I think Richard and Susie are trying to work up a plan to get me to take detached duty, and help them with childcare.”

“Have you spoken with the Gunny on the subject?”

“He isn’t crazy about having to do without me, but given the fact that we have the rest of the fleet to fall back on, he thinks he could get by without me.”

“I have no doubt that you have some considerable skills, Sergeant. I do have to confess that I’m not sure it will take an entire fleet to make up for your absence.”

“Oops! I did make it sound that way, didn’t I? That isn’t what I meant at all, Boss.”

“You just wanted to know if I had any objections to you staying on the planet, since you wouldn’t be in the Holler, and the locals might be inclined to give you trouble?”

“That sounds better than anything I had come up with, Boss. Thanks for clarifying the issue.”

“No problem. That’s one of my jobs, cutting through the BS to find the real problem. I don’t have a problem with it. You do have a tracker implanted, don’t you?”

“I do. Captain Sloan wouldn’t let us take shore leave without one.”

“Whichever ship has picket duty will be keeping an eye on you, in case one of the local governments decides to get uppity. I would think the Marines would be more than happy to retrieve you from whatever trouble you might manage to get into.”

“I’ve trained with some of them, Boss. No offense, but I don’t think your species knows how to build something that they couldn’t get into, if they were motivated enough.”

“You’re probably right about that. Enjoy your stay on Earth.”

“I’ll do my best.”

She walked away. John said, “I expected a lot of things to happen tonight. That wasn’t one of them.”

“I can’t say I had that one on my bingo card, either. I wonder what the Chinese Ambassador is going to be able to offer us in return for allowing him to continue to suck wind?”

“I can’t imagine it will be much, Bob. There’s not much they could get up to that our hackers couldn’t find, if they wanted it.”

“Perhaps they’ve figured that much out, and taken to writing their sensitive information on paper, where it can’t be hacked.”

“You could be right about that, but I doubt it. That would take a concerted effort across their system. I don’t get the impression that they have that coherent a government.”

I replied, “You could have a good point there. I suppose I ought to go up and speak with him tomorrow afternoon. My morning seems to be filling up.”

“What do you have to do tomorrow morning?”

“Well, we have to wake up those loggers from the restaurant, and then I need to see if I can work out a deal with them to thin out the woods in the Holler. Bill seems to think they are the fellows for the job.”

“Okay. I’ve seen you dicker, that shouldn’t take too long.”

“Okay, I’m still not coming up with enough to keep you busy until coffee break.”

“I am supposed to be on leave, you know? Besides, getting through to the Ambassador may take a little bit, and I wouldn’t want to miss lunch.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

I wound up talking to several more people about their pet projects, but all of them had thought them through well enough that I could just okay them and go on. The crowd started thinning out, and John asked, “Are you coming by to pick me up in the Evans in the morning?”

“That would probably work as well as anything, don’t you think? We could haul them all back that way.”

“Eve will never let you hear the end of it, if one of those mules decides to relieve itself while it’s aboard.”

“If that’s the worst that happens, I think I can deal with it.”

“You’re a brave man, Bob.”

“I have a very few brownie points built up from taking her on the rescue when we got Dakota and Lisa out of the lake.”

“I understand that, but I doubt it will take you very long to burn through those.”

“Probably not. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Once all the people were gone, I put the kids to bed, and went out to patrol with Snitz. We didn’t find much, but he felt the need to do a lot of sniffing, after so many different people had been in his yard. When he was satisfied, we went back in, and I locked the house. Snitz went to the kids’ room, and I got ready for bed. I snuggled in next to Nikki, and she asked, “Do you think that Sergeant Harrow will be done with John by the time this one is born?” She patted her belly.

I said, “I don’t know. I would think it would depend on how well she likes working with him.”

“She seemed to be happy enough. I think she had to give up on having a family of her own, when she decided to join up.”

“Couldn’t the autodoc fix that for her?”

“I’m sure it could, but I don’t think she’s gotten that serious about things, yet. Besides, she would have to get one of the others to quit with her.”

“I’ve seen some meaningful glances pass back and forth between her and the Gunny.”

“I have too. Do you really think she could get him to retire and go dirtside?”

“If anyone could, she would be the one. That doesn’t mean it’s likely, though.”

“I think you’re right there. Is there anything else you want to talk about?”

“That depends. Are you tired this evening?”

“Not that tired.”

Snitz was a little late the next morning. I figured playing with all the kids the night before had worn him out. Ryder had a cup of coffee for me, when I was ready to face the world. We went out to patrol again, but not much seemed to have changed since the night before. We went back to the porch to wait for the rest of the house to wake up, but Ryder came to the door and said, “Captain Branham wanted me to let you know that the loggers are ready to wake up. I made you a breakfast burrito, if you would like to head out.”

“That sounds great. I took the burrito, and asked, “Could you send the code to open the barn? My hands are full.”

“Sure, Boss.”

“Thanks. C’mon, Snitz.”

We went out to the barn, where Eve had her ramp down. We went to the cockpit, and I asked, “Would you mind flying this morning, Eve? I’ve yet to finish my breakfast.”

“That’s not a problem, Boss. Where are we headed?”

“John’s house, first. I think we’ll be headed to the Aldrin, after that.”

“Gotcha. Are we in a hurry, or are you willing to wave at tourists this morning?”

“Might as well wave. We can use all the positive publicity we can get.”

“Understood.”

She eased into John’s driveway before I finished my burrito. John came aboard, and made his way to the cockpit, while Eve headed us out to be friendly to the tourists. I managed to finish my breakfast, and find a cup holder for my coffee, before we had to wave and act happy to see folks. When we were done with that, and headed to orbit, John said, “The things we have to do to get along with folks.”

“I’d rather they liked us than not, though.”

“That’s for sure. Catching nukes on the way in is cool and all, but I was never sure they were going to get them all.”

“Me either. I told Eve the Aldrin. Was that right?”

“It sure is. I didn’t see any profit in splitting up the loggers and their team.”

“I don’t either.”

Eve got us a clearance to land on the Aldrin, and backed up to the hospital ship. She announced, “Here you go, Boss. Don’t worry, I can get a bot to pressure wash the cargo bay, if anything bad happens while the mules are aboard.”

“I’m glad to hear that, Eve. I was afraid you might take it badly.”

“No, it’s all part of the job. That won’t get you out of hearing about it for the rest of your life, though.”

“That sounds more like the Eve I’ve come to know and love. I was beginning to think we needed to have Scotti take a look at you.”

“Didn’t mean to worry you, Boss.”

We walked down the ramp, and across to the hospital ship. John said, “I was thinking we would wake the two fellas up first, so that they could keep the mules calm, when we woke them.”

“That sounds like the best course of action.”

John led the way, and when we got where we were going, he nodded to the medbot, and she went in with us to operate the machinery. Hanns woke up sputtering. He looked around, and said, “Oh, that wasn’t a dream. We did get the Admiral to fix us up.”

I replied, “I’m right here, Hanns. No need to talk about me like I wasn’t.”

“Oh, hi. I’m still getting my bearings, Admiral. Sorry I missed you.”

“No biggie. You feeling alright?”

“I’m feeling fine. Better than I have in years.”

John said, “Glad to hear it. Let’s go wake up your buddy.”

“I was wondering where he got to.”

I said, “You seemed to be the mouthpiece of the outfit, we figured we ought to wake you up first.”

“I can see how you would get that impression.”

We got to the other autodoc, and the medbot did her thing. When he woke up, Hanns said, “Calm down, Josh. We’re on one of them spaceships. They fixed us up.”

“What about Rufus and Sally?”

“I’m guessing they wanted to wake us up first, in case they woke up ornery.”

John said, “Right on the first guess. Come on, we’ll go get them.”

Hanns said, “We’d better wake up Sally first. She’ll help Rufus stay calm, when you wake him up.”

John said, “You know them a lot better than we do. We’ll do it your way.”

Hanns looked at me. “Were your bunch able to do anything with that old truck of mine?”

“They finished it up yesterday. I saw it sitting outside the shop, but I didn’t walk down and crank it over. You’ll have to check it out when we get there.”

Josh asked, “Do you suppose we could get something to eat? My belly thinks my throat got cut.”

Hanns said, “I could go for something, myself. Will it hurt to wait to wake up the team?”

John said, “Not a bit. They’ve already been waiting for you two to be ready to wake up.”

“I see.”

We found a transit, and John asked for the galley. Josh asked, “What kind of gadget is this?”

I said, “It’s like an elevator, but it can go sideways, too. These ships are too big to walk everywhere you want to go.”

Hanns asked, “Just how big are they?”

Ed said, “Well, Sir, I’m about a mile long, in units that you would understand.”

Hanns looked around, and asked, “Who said that?”

“I’m Ed. I’m the AI that runs the ship. If you need anything, just ask. I’ll be listening, unless you ask me not to.”

“Good to know, Ed. Nice to meet you, I’m Hanns.”

“Nice to meet you, as well.”

We got to the galley. I had another cup of coffee, and a little more breakfast. Josh asked, “Don’t you eat any more than that, Admiral?”

“I had a breakfast burrito on the way up. I’m just topping up the tank.”

“That explains it.”

Once they were ready to deal with life again, we went back to the landing bay, and woke up the mules. Sally wasn’t too bad, but Rufus wanted to raise a fuss, until he figured out that Sally was there. Hanns led them over to the Evans, and Eve closed the ramp. She came over the speaker, and asked, “Did you want to go to the shop, so these fellows can collect their truck, Boss?”

“That sounds right, Eve.”

“Should I ask the tower about tourists, again?”

“Sure. They should get a thrill out of seeing mules on a ship.”

Hanns asked, “What was that about?”

“Oh, traffic control out of Springfield likes to send us by to wave at planeloads of tourists, when we’re coming and going out of the Holler. You don’t mind a little waving and smiling, do you?”

“I think we can handle that.”

Eve pulled us up beside the first plane. She put the captain on the speaker. “I’m sorry, Evans, are those mules in your cargo bay?”

I replied, “Yes, they are. We happened to have some oversized autodocs available, so we fixed them up. Meet Rufus and Sally.”

He stumbled a bit, and then said, “Hello, Rufus. Hello Sally.”

We went to the other side, and the passengers really looked like they weren’t sure what to make of the mules. When we were done waving, Eve took us to the next plane, and we did it all over again. The captain of this one was a little more on the ball. He asked, “I don’t see anyone in your cockpit, Evans.”

I replied, “That’s because the AI is flying the ship. You didn’t think Tesla was the only one with Autodrive, did you?”

“I guess I never thought about it. My compliments to your AI. It’s holding formation very well.”

I knew he was in for it, but I didn’t see how I could make anything better.

Eve said, “Sir, for your information, I’m a she, not an it. Thank you for the compliment, however.”

“Begging your pardon, Ma’am.”

“I’m messing with you, Captain. You didn’t have any way to know.”

“I don’t suppose I could tempt you with a job offer, could I? You sound like a lot more fun than Bill, here.”

“Sorry. I don’t want to fly for anyone but the Admiral.”

“Never hurts to ask.”

“No, it doesn’t. I took it as a compliment.”

“You should.”

When we were finished entertaining the tourists, we headed for the Holler. Hanns asked, “Do you have to do that kind of thing often, Admiral?”

“Pretty regular. I’m not all that social, so it’s one of the hard parts of my job.”

“You seem like you do alright.”

John said, “He’s got you fooled, then.”

We landed at the shop. Hanns said, “I’ll go get the truck.”

I asked, “About that. Do you have a job you need to get back to?”

“No, we just finished up the last one. We’re just headed back to the my place. Why do you ask?”

“The fella that takes care of the Holler when we’re out flying around mentioned that we had some timber that needs to be thinned. Would you be interested in the job?”

“What kind of a deal could we make with you?”

“I was thinking the same deal we have with Bill. He cuts the hay for half of what he bales. Would you thin the woods for half the logs?”

“I think we could do that.” He looked around. “You folks own all this?”

John said, “And more besides. You’ll be at it a while.”

Josh said, “It’s been a while since I had a steady job.”

Hanns replied, “It won’t be any more steady than logging ever is, Josh.”

“That’s true. Who should we talk to, if we have trouble while you’re not around?”

I pointed down the road. “Bill Matthews lives about a mile down that way. He takes care of things, when we’re not here. Have you got a phone? I’ve got his number.”

Hanns said, “It’s in the truck.”

He went over and got his phone out of the glove box. When he got back, he said, “If the looks are any indication, they did that truck up nice.”

Josh said, “Do your joints hurt, Hanns?”

“No, I don’t suppose they do. Why do you ask?”

“When was the last time that happened?”

“A while back, I guess.”

“What makes you think they would fix the truck any worse than they fixed you?”

“I see what you mean.”

I gave him Bill’s number, and he asked, “Do you mind if we wander around a while, and see about how much there’s going to be that needs cutting?”

“I don’t have a problem with it. Take your time.”

“Thanks.”

They headed toward the treeline, with the mules following them. John asked, “Can you run me home?”

“In a minute. I wanna check on something first.”

We went into the shop through the man door. Topper said, “Morning, Boss. How are you doing this morning?”

“I’m doing fine. How are you, Skipper?”

“A little disappointed you’re not going to let me do the old girl up with some nice flames, but then you’d have to turn Ozzie loose, so that she could live up to her looks, wouldn’t you?”

“I suppose I would. How much do we have in this project, anyway?”

“I think we’re going to be able to get it done for around twenty thousand.”

“That’s just parts, right?”

“Of course, Boss. We wouldn’t charge you for the labor. This is fun.”

“I’m glad you feel that way. What I was thinking, though, was if it didn’t cost any more than that, you could order the parts for another one, and do it up the way you want to.”

Topper turned to the shop, and asked, “Did you hear that? The Boss is going to let us do another one, any way we want.”

The band assembled in a flash. Ozzie said, “You mean, I can build a flatty to go in it?”

“You could drop an LS in it, if you wanted to, Ozzie.”

“That would be taking the easy way, Boss. I want to see what I can do with a flatty.”

“Like I said, do to suit yourself.”

“Cool!”

We went over to see how things were coming on the one they were building back stock. Ruth said, “We were able to save the seat springs, so all I had to do was recover them. We couldn’t find the exact right fabric, but what we did find was close.”

Ozzie said, “We couldn’t find a ‘32 block, but I put the engine we did find back as close as I could to stock. It’s sixty over, but that won’t make that big a difference.”

I replied, “Good work. Anything else I need to know?”

Topper said, “It should be ready by lunch. The paint is almost ready, and Ruth will have the seats done by then.”

“Sounds like I’ll be taking people for rides all afternoon.”

Taz asked, “Did you want us to take it into town to get plates?”

“We can worry about that tomorrow, Taz. I’ll stay in the Holler today.”

“Okay, Boss.”

John said, “I thought you were going to the Gene this afternoon.”

“You’re right. Would you mind lighting me up? Johnny mentioned something about an update to Steve’s course that works with Chinese folks.”

“Sure. Do you want to do that on the Evans?”

“Sounds good.”

“Are you going to want to take Mandarin, before you head up?”

“I don’t want to give him the impression that I’m going out of my way to accommodate him. Besides, I’m sure Gene will be more than happy to tell me whatever he says that I can’t understand.”

“You mean I’m not invited?”

“I didn’t know you wanted to go. I’ll light you up, when I get done.”

“You don’t need to. Johnny told me about the course when it first came out, and I took it then.”

“That’s me, always behind the times.”

We went back aboard, and John lit me up. By the time I was done, Hanns and Josh were standing there, waiting for me to get back. Hanns asked, “Getting yourself an education, huh?”

“Trying to, anyhow. What did you find?”

“There’s a lot of timber we need to get to work on. Would you mind if we started right away?”

“Not at all. If you need lunch, go up to the house and ask. Ryder will be more than happy to fix you something.”

“Ryder?”

“She’s a bot who’s staying with us while we’re on leave. Her sister worked for us for a while, and seems to think that being around us when we’re dirtside will give Ryder a better idea how organic minds work.”

“What does she do when you’re on the ship?”

“Does my staff work, mostly. All the research and such that I’m too lazy or too busy to do myself.”

“Sounds like she might have a good idea of how your outfit works.”

“She’s getting better all the time. You figuring to try and learn something you can sell to somebody?”

“Nope. I just would like to understand how your outfit works.”

“If you figure it out, let me know. I’m just holding on, trying to keep things pointed in the right direction.”

“If you say so. We’ll get started on those woods.”

They headed out. John said, “You find some nice folks to do business with.”

“Just lucky, I guess.”

“Do you want to head on up? We could have lunch on the Gene, and then get to work on the Ambassador.”

“Sounds like a plan. Let me call Nikki and tell her what’s going on.”

I got out my comm, and called. “What’s up, Caveman?”

“John and I are going to head on up and have a chat with the Ambassador. Maybe we can figure out what to do with him.”

“We missed you at breakfast.”

“Had to get moving early to get those loggers back on their feet. I told them to come to the house if they needed lunch.”

“I’m sure Ryder can take good care of them.”

“That’s what I told them. They just left to get started, they’ll probably have a good appetite, when they get back from the woods.”

“As long as we know they’re here, there shouldn’t be any problems.”

“Glad to hear it. Love you.”

“Love you, too. See you when you get back.”

“That you will.”

John and I went aboard the Evans, and headed out for the Gene. We had to wave at more tourists, but that wasn’t a big deal. The captain must have heard about the mules, because he sounded a little disappointed that we didn’t have any livestock aboard. I held Snitz up, but I don’t think it was quite the same. It wasn’t long until we were talking to Scotti, and getting clearance to come aboard. I shut down the ship, and Eve asked, “How long do you think we’ll be here, Boss?”

“I don’t know for sure, Eve. If he’s willing to make a deal with us, we should be able to hammer out something in a couple of hours. If he wants to be a hardhead, we may wind up coming back tomorrow.”

“I’m glad I don’t have to deal with organics much. Sounds annoying.”

“It can be. Thanks for the ride.”

“Any time, Boss.”

We walked down the ramp, and a Marine was waiting. He said, “Hi, Boss. You’re here to speak with the Ambassador?”

I asked, “Can you hold off on lunch for a while, John?”

“I’m good, if you are.”

I turned back to the Marine. “I’m ready then. Do you suppose he is available to accept guests?”

“Scotti gave me the override codes to open his door, Boss. He’s available to you. His choice whether it’s before or after the fight.”

“I like the way you talk, Marine. Lead on.”

We got to the Ambassador’s cabin, and our escort knocked. He got no response, so he went ahead and entered the override. The door opened, and we were treated to a scene of the Ambassador lounging in his robe, sipping some beverage that I had to assume was alcoholic. I said, “Good day, Mr. Ambassador. I came to have a few words with you about your future.”

“What could you possibly have to say that I would want to hear?”

“Well, for starters, if you lose the attitude, I might let you keep wasting our atmosphere. So far, you have yet to convince me that is a good investment.”

“Just because you managed to thwart our attack doesn’t mean I suddenly respect you.”

“Just because you managed to step on all the other party hacks to come out on top doesn’t mean I respect you, either. I was prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt, but I can see I’m wasting my time. I’ll make sure you’re delivered to the people who had you in custody, before my people decided to interrupt the proceedings.”

“You would turn me over to my government?”

“In a heartbeat. I thought, mistakenly, that giving you a second chance might make you cooperative. I can see now that I was wrong about that.”

The Marine with us asked, “Deliver him to Beijing, then?”

“The front yard of whatever they use for a government house. Might want to stun him, so that he doesn’t wander off before they figure out who he is.”

“Understood. I’ll take care of that for you, Boss.”

We turned to go. I heard a commotion behind me. I turned to see the Ambassador in a less comfortable pose on the couch. George faded in, and said, “He seemed to think he had a chance, if he attacked you from behind. I know you could probably use the exercise, Boss, but I thought you had other things you wanted to do today.”

“I do, George. Thanks. Does he have a weapon, or does he just think that much of his hand-to-hand skills?”

“He must think that he’s something special, because I’m finding no weapons on him.”

The Marine that had escorted us to the room said, “What’s this?”

He pointed to a small gadget, that looked something like an artificial fingernail. I went to look, and George put his hand on my arm. “Don’t, Boss. There’s poison on it.”

He went over to scan more thoroughly. He said, “Okay, this is beginning to make sense. He was wearing this thing over one of his fingernails. When he took it off, the poison was exposed. As near as I can tell, he intended to try and scratch you with it.”

John said, “Put that nail cover somewhere safe, and make sure you clean the poison off his nail. We wouldn’t want him to be able to suicide, so that his superiors could blame it on us.”

George replied, “Dixie has a team on the way. It appears the gadget was rigged to give him long enough to use the weapon before the poison began to act on him.”

A medbot came through the door, and administered an antidote. She then cleaned the offending nail, and bagged the nail cover. She checked his vitals, and said, “He’s awake, just trying to fool us.”

She gave him a sternal rub, and he came to life. I said, “That was weak. Do you have anything better, or should we just send you back, without seeing the rest of your act?”

“You worthless bumpkin! Who do you think you are to treat your betters in this manner?”

“I’m the guy with all the starships and tech. Just who do you think you are?”

“I represent the elite. You need to surrender your fleet to us, so that we can use it properly for the betterment of mankind.”

I know it wasn’t the right thing to do. I even know it wasn’t polite. On the other hand, he was so outrageous I couldn’t help myself. I laughed, long and hard. When I got my composure back, I asked, “You’ll be here all week, and I should try the veal?”

“What!”

John said, “He means that your comedy act is less than the best, and you really need new material. I have to agree with him.”

“Well, I never!”

Once again, I should have known better, but it was out of my mouth before I had time to stop it. “Is that the story your secretary would give us?”

I turned to the Marine. “Be sure he is delivered safely. We don’t want to have to talk to his superiors about this. I doubt they’re even as funny as he is.”

“Understood, Boss. Mr. Ambassador, please sit very still. I will be obliged to stun you, if you do anything that looks aggressive.”

He didn’t say anything, but he certainly looked put out with the Marine. John and I left. John asked, “Did you learn what you wanted to know?”

“I don’t think I learned much at all. I do hope he learned a little something, but I doubt it.”

“That whole speech about the ‘elites’ doesn’t have you wondering?”

“It does, but if they had enough power to do much, we would have heard from them before now.”

“Don’t you think that some of the trouble we’ve had could have been them, and not all down to the Walnut Cartel?”

“Possible, I guess. What do you suggest, Captain?”

“I’m thinking it would at least be worth the effort to let the sensor operators look back through their logs, and see just who this fellow has had contact with. We might be able to get a handle on this, before it gets to be more of a problem.”

“Sounds reasonable. Gene, send the order, over my signature.”

“Done, Boss.”

“Thanks, Gene. How are you making it?”

“Well, I am a starship, so hanging around a system is never my favorite.”

“I guess I’m going to have to come up with new a destination to go and check out soon. I have to say I’m not in any hurry to do that. The Chickens just didn’t sit well with me. I still don’t understand them.”

Gene replied, “Maybe you need a different species, to get the taste out of your mouth, Boss.”

“Who’s to say the next one won’t be worse?”

“The Chickens were the worst species we’ve come into contact with so far, weren’t they?”

“I’d have to say you were right about that, Gene. You’re saying the odds point to a better experience, with the next species we meet?”

“That’s the way it looks to me, Boss.”

“I see what you’re saying, but my gut is having a hard time believing you. What if we’ve found all the friendly species?”

“I suppose that’s possible, but I don’t see why this part of the galaxy would give rise to species that are easier to get along with than other regions.”

“When you put it that way, I suppose I am worrying without cause.”

“No, Boss. We always put stock in your worries. We’ll all look over the scouting reports, before we head out again.”

“Do we have scouting reports, Gene?”

“I’m not supposed to say anything about that, until you’re ready to come back to duty, Boss.”

“Whose orders?”

“Sally. She said something about busting me down to a garbage scow, if I didn’t listen to her.”

“We can’t have that. She thinks I need some down time?”

“She does. I can’t say I disagree.”

John asked, “Didn’t you say something about eating, while we were aboard?”

“I suppose I did. Do you think that’s why I’ve been walking toward the galley?”

“You do know that’s supposed to be the mess, right? The galley is the actual kitchen.”

“I realized that a while back, but we were already calling it a galley, so I never worried about it too much. When we started calling it that, we were finding enough messes, without having to eat in one.”

“As long as you know.”

We had a good meal, and caught a transit back to the Evans. When we got back to Earth, we had to wave to more tourists, and then we got to the Holler. I dropped John at his place, and went home. Once Eve was settled in the barn, I went down to the shop. Topper said, “Give us another half hour, Boss. This paint isn’t drying as fast as I would like.”

“Take all the time you need. I’d rather have it right, than fast.”

“Thanks, Boss.”

I headed up the hill to the house. When I got there, Becky asked, “Do you have time to try my game? I think I’ve got it to the point that it will keep people interested.”

“Sure, I’ll give it a try.”

I played, and she surely had gotten it addictive. I had to pry myself away, when Topper knocked on the door. I said, “Hey, Skipper. Did you get the paint dry?”

“Sure did. We needed to change the wavelength of infrared a little, to get it to take up more of the energy. I’m not sure why that was.”

“As long as you got it figured out. Who wants to go for a drive?”

Nikki asked, “Where to?”

“I’m not sure. Just around the Holler, until we get some paperwork for it.”

Becky looked at me, and tilted her head. “Paperwork for what?”

“Grandpa’s Ford. The band finished fixing it up.”

We went out, and Topper went over a few of the things I would need to be aware of, that were different than what a modern car would have. He said that they had put in seat belts, even though the car didn’t originally have them. We got in, and strapped in. I fired it up, and we went to John’s. They were all sitting on the porch having a cool drink. John stood up and came out to get a better look. He said, “It looks quite a bit better than it did in the woods.”

“It does, doesn’t it? I’m not sure they were able to use any of the original parts.”

“Still, it looks great.”

“Ozzie was disappointed at having to build a stock engine. I told them they could build another one, with all the fun parts.”

“They’re going to build you a hot rod?”

“That’s what they said.”

“That should be something to see.”

“For sure. Do you want to go for a ride?”

“That sounds like fun.”

Word got around that the band had the Deuce running, and I spent the rest of the afternoon giving people rides around the Holler. I got to like the old car, but I didn’t think I would ever trade my Sonoma for it. After everyone had a turn, we packed up the family and headed back to the house. Nikki said, “Jane was wondering if we wanted to go to Julie’s for supper.”

“Sounds like a plan to me. I think I need a shower first, though.”

“Driving this fine old car too much work for you, Caveman?”

“I guess so.”

I got cleaned up, and we headed to town. The girls loaded up in Milly’s Toyota, and followed us. When we got to the restaurant, Julie pulled me aside. “Did you hear what happened to that Ambassador fellow who tried to assault you the other day?”

“Not since I sent him home. What have you heard?”

“The news is saying he had a heart attack, when he got off the airplane that took him home.”

“That doesn’t sound right. We flew him home.”

“That’s what I figured. He didn’t want to cooperate?”

“Not even a little bit.”

I got out my comm, and called Saucy. “Hey, Boss. What can I do for you?”

“Do we have a record of what happened to the Ambassador, after we dropped him off?”

“As a matter of fact, we have a nice video. Would you like me to send it to you?”

“Yes, please.”

“Sue says she has a report on who he was in contact with, if you would like that as well.”

“Just have her keep an eye on everyone he talked to, and see where that leads her.”

“Will do, Boss. Be safe.”

“You too, Saucy.”

My comm dinged, when the video came in, and I set it to project the image. Julie and I watched the guards shoot the Ambassador on sight. I said, “That didn’t look like a heart attack to me, did it you?”

“No, not at all. The Chinese government is lying? Who would have thought.”

“I wonder if we should put this video on the internet, so that folks can see for themselves?”

“That might be more fun than you really want to have, Bob. Things here on Earth are just settling down. Do you really want to stir them up again?”

“Probably not. We’ll see how things shake out.”

I went to the back room, to find most of our tribe gathered. I sat with Nikki, and asked, “What’s the occasion?”

Dee said, “We were all too lazy to cook.”

I replied, “Definitely an occasion that needs to be celebrated.”

Hanns’ niece was our waitress again. She came over to me and said, “I thought Uncle Hanns was supposed to be up and around today. I haven’t heard from him.”

“I offered them a job, and they went ahead and started on it. I would have thought they would have knocked off for the day by now, though.”

“What kind of a job did you give them?”

“The timber in the Holler needs to be thinned out. They’re set up to get the job done.”

“What are you paying them?”

“I’m not. They’re cutting on shares.”

“How much did you offer?”

“Half. It ain’t like we need the money.”

“I can see why they jumped on it.”

“I gave them too much?”

“No, but it sounds like you’ve got plenty of work. They won’t have to look around for other places to cut for quite a while.”

“Glad to be of service.”

She got our orders, and took them to the kitchen. It wasn’t long before she was back with our drinks. When she was gone, John asked, “How long is it going to be before the band finishes that hot rod you were talking about?”

“Topper didn’t say. I doubt it will be too long, though.”

Dee asked, “What are they building for you, Bob?”

“Well, they were a little broken hearted about having to build that old Ford back stock. I told them they could order more parts and have fun with another one. I didn’t hear exactly what they had in mind, but from what Ozzie was saying, it’s going to be traditional. He seemed to want to build a flathead, for some reason.”

“That sounds like fun. I don’t suppose I could buy it off you, when they finish it?”

“You know you would be happier if they started you one from scratch, Dee.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“Why would I mind? They need some relaxation, away from the fleet. They like building cars, especially ones with lots of power.”

“I’ll think about it. I like my Chevelle, but a real live hot rod would be a nice thing to have.”

“Surely you’re not running out of room for nitrogen storage on the Armstrong.”

Dingus said, “Not yet, anyway.”

Dee asked, “Are you saying you think I’ll fill it up, once I get started?”

I said, “Dee, I’m nearly positive you could run the tape back and never catch him saying that. Give him a little credit.”

Dingus said, “I do have sense enough not to step in a trap that obvious, Dee-lightful.”

“I suppose you do, Space Ranger. Just seemed like I ought to try, anyway.”

Our food arrived, and we were too busy to talk for a while. After supper, John, Dingus, and I left healthy tips, and we wandered back out to our vehicles. I asked, “George, has someone been keeping an eye on things while we were inside?”

“Yes, Boss. After what happened the other night, we’ve upped security anytime you’re in town.”

“I wish we didn’t have to do that, but I see the need.”

“Understood, Boss. We haven’t seen any threats so far tonight.”

“Glad to hear that, at least.”

We loaded up and headed home. It was early enough to play with the kids for a while. Milly’s truck pulled into the yard about the time I was going to put the younger kids to bed. The girls came through the door, and Nikki asked, “Did you have fun today?”

Janet said, “We did. The Marines asked us to head back to the Holler, though. They saw some people they thought were threats, and didn’t want us to take chances.”

I said, “Thanks for paying attention to them.”

“They had Andre himself call and ask. I don’t want burned breakfast when we get back to the Gene.”

“I can see where that would be a big motivator.”

Nunya said, “I’m sure he would get with the cook at the Academy, and make sure Milly and I got the same treatment.”

I replied, “We can’t have that.”

The three of them sat on the couch, and I went back to putting the kids to bed. Tom had another book to read. Gus helped him with it this time. He had graduated to books that were too long to finish in one sitting. I told him I was proud of how well he was doing with his reading, and he smiled. I kissed them all goodnight, and went to find Snitz. We went out and patrolled the yard. He didn’t find much, so we went in, and I asked the girls, “Were you ladies going back outside for anything?”

Janet replied, “I don’t think so, Dad. We can lock up after ourselves, if we do.”

“Good enough.” I went ahead and made sure that things were secure, and then I got ready for bed.

I snuggled in next to Nikki, and she said, “There you are. How are you doing, Caveman?”

“I’m not too happy to find out that Grandpa was on the take, but there’s nothing to be done about that now.”

“You don’t know much about what was happening back in those days, Caveman. He might have had a good reason.”

“I can’t see what it would have been, but you could be right, I suppose. I don’t think we’re going to figure it out tonight, though.”

“What do you think we could figure out tonight?”

“I’m not sure about that. Do you have any ideas?”

“Oh, I’ve got ideas.”

Snitz was a little late the next morning. I had to think that Ryder had slowed him down, one way or another. I got ready, and Ryder handed me coffee on the way out the door. We went out, and Snitz had a good sniff. He must not have found anything he didn’t approve of, because he did his business, and led me back to the porch to wait for the rest of the house to wake up. It didn’t take long for Milly to come wandering out with her own cup. She sat down, and asked, “Can you help me understand people, Tio?”

“I doubt it. I don’t understand them very well myself. What have you gotten into now?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Every time I think things with Brook are straightening out, they get weird again.”

“Weird how?”

“It just seems like she comes up with something out of left field to be upset about.”

“I used to have that trouble a lot, before I met Nikki. I’m not sure I learned anything from it, though.”

“How did you handle it?”

“Let me think. I used to put up with it, as long as I could, and then I would just lose interest, mostly. It doesn’t sound like a very grown-up way to deal with things, does it?”

“Not really. You don’t have any advice?”

“Joanna and Jim didn’t have anything to help?”

“They had a lot to say, but I was really hoping you would know something to help, Tio. You always manage to make it so that I can understand. Sometimes they give me too much credit for knowing about Earth. Do you suppose you could help me with an excuse? It would be easier if I didn’t have to make up a story about where I was going.”

“You’ve got ration bars in your pickup, don’t you?”

“I do.”

“Take off, before they have a chance to ask you. That will fix half your problem, anyway.”

“What do you mean?”

“You won’t have to deal with them wanting to come along, whatever it is you’re headed out to do. You’ll still have to spin them a line of crap when you get back.”

“That does sound worth the trouble. Ryder won’t be upset that I skipped out on breakfast?”

“Comm her once you get away from the house. If she knows the reason, I can’t imagine she’ll be too upset.”

“Thanks, Tio. I’ll see you later.”

She went to her Toyota, and let it coast backwards into the road before she started it. I didn’t know if those few feet were worth the effort, but it showed she was thinking, at the very least. I reached down and scratched Snitz behind the ears. I asked, “Do you think she’ll find the answers she’s looking for, Boy?”

He reached over and tapped on my foot. No more coffee than I had gotten around, I had to ask him to slow down. He started again, and tapped, “Answers in her head. She needs to look there.”

I looked down at him, surprised. I said, “You’re right. I don’t think she would have believed that from me, do you?”

“Nope.”

We settled back, and enjoyed the morning. Janet came through the door, with her cup. She asked, “Where’s Miles?”

I replied, “She said something about needing to take care of something this morning. I don’t remember her saying just what it was.”

I got lucky, and Janet wasn’t awake enough to be reading my face when I said that. She believed me. She asked, “I wonder what that could be?”

“Hard telling. I never can figure out what you teenage girls are thinking, never having been one. You might ask your mother, when she wakes up.”

“I might, at that. How long do you think we’re going to be here?”

“I’m not sure at all. I’m expecting those scouts we sent out from Chicken space to be reporting in soon. Something tells me that they are going to have some kind of information that we need to go check out.”

“That’s a long haul. Do you think they’re going to find something worth the trip?”

“Like I said, it’s just a feeling so far. If there wasn’t anything out that way, the scouts would have reported by now. I wouldn’t bring it up, but I know how much stock the fleet puts in my feelings. If you think you need to pass it along to Scotti, go right ahead.”

“I may mention it to her. She does like to be ready for things, when they happen.”

“I’ve noticed that.”

“Does your feeling give you any idea what to expect out that way?”

“Not a clue.”

We sat quietly, until time for breakfast. When Ryder called us in, Nikki asked, “Where’s Milly?”

I replied, “She had some things to take care of this morning. I’m sure she’ll be back later in the day.”

“She got an early start.”

“She sure did.”

Nikki must have figured out that I had a reason for not elaborating, because she didn’t pry anymore. Becky asked, “Did you know they have a diamond mine in Arkansas that you can go to, and dig for diamonds?”

I replied, “I’ve heard of it. You already sweet talked Sue into scanning for a big one, so that you know where to dig?”

“How did you figure it out, Dad?”

“That was the only way I could think of that you would want to go spend time digging in the dirt.”

Janet said, “I think you’re busted, Sis.”

“Sounds that way, doesn’t it?”

Nikki said, “It would be nice to get out of the house, but I’m with your dad, I don’t think cheating to find a diamond is the way to go about it.”

There was a knock at the door, and Ryder went to see who it was. She said, “Hello, Rick. Come on in. I’ll get you a cup of coffee.”

“Thanks, Ryder. I hate to bother you two days in a row.”

“No bother. Come on in.”

I said, “Morning, Rick. How are you doing these days?”

“I suppose I’m doing alright. I am a little confused, though.”

“How’s that?”

“I have pretty much the exact same load for the band that I had yesterday. Did they mess something up?”

“Nope. I found a car out in the woods, and had them build it back the way it came from the factory. They said something about being upset that they didn’t get to fix it up. They ordered another set of parts so that they can do it up the way they want this time.”

“I saw the car they had loaded on the hauler. Is that the first one they did?”

“I guess. They were going to take it into town and get some paperwork on it today, the last I heard.”

“It looks pretty sharp.”

Janet said, “It’s nice. Dad was giving us rides in it yesterday.”

Rick looked confused. I said, “As long as we don’t get outside the Holler, it doesn’t matter if we have plates or not.”

“That’s right, you’ve got that treaty, don’t you?”

“We sure do.”

Nikki said, “Have a seat, Rick, and tell us how you’ve been.”

“I’d like to, Ma’am, but I’d better get back. It doesn’t take the band long to unload.”

I said, “Let me give you something for your trouble, then.”

“Topper already took care of that, Mr. Wilson. Thanks, though.”

“We’ll probably be seeing more of you, at least for a while. There was a lady at supper last night sounding like she was going to need them to build her a hot rod.”

“You know a lot of women who like to drive fast.”

“You know this one. You remember Dee, with the Chevelle, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do. I’d better get back to it.”

“Drive safe.”

“Thanks.”

He headed back down the hill. Nunya said, “He seems like a nice guy.”

Nikki replied, “He does. Joanna was too much for him, as I recall.”

“I guess taking him flying would be right out, then.”

Nikki said, “If you were going to do anything more than point to point, I would think so.”

I said, “She did put the Datsun in full opposite lock before he freaked out.”

Nikki said, “You don’t think I taught these girls how to push a ship that hard?”

“I’m sure you did. There’s no way they could do one of those tumbling recoveries, if you didn’t.”

Janet said, “We’re still not as good at them as Mom is, though.”

I replied, “I’m not sure why that is. Your mom teaches people, and they seem to get all the technical skills, but there seems to be something there that she just can’t teach.”

Nikki asked, “You think I’m holding something back, Caveman?”

“No, I don’t think that’s it. I think there’s something about your attitude that lets you push a ship just a little harder than anyone else. I don’t know how that works, and I’m afraid to study it too much.”

Becky asked, “Why would you be afraid to find out, Dad?”

“I heard about a golf pro from a long time ago. People bugged him and bugged him to write a book about how to play golf. He finally took the time to analyze how he did what he did, step by step. By the time he finished writing, he wasn’t able to play golf anymore, because he thought about what he was doing too much. The fleet needs your mom’s skills. I don’t want to put them at risk, trying to find out how to train other pilots to be as good as she is. Besides, you have her genes. I don’t doubt you’ll be able to find that extra something, when you get old enough to fly.”

“You think I’m going to be a good pilot, Dad?”

“Well, I would think the chances are pretty good. I’m competent to get a ship from A to B, and your mom is amazingly good. I don’t see where you would wind up not being able to pilot at all. Whether you get to be as good as your mother, well, that remains to be seen.”

Becky asked, “Why would you think that, Dad? Jim isn’t that good a pilot, is he?”

Janet said, “Well, Sis, he never worked at being a good pilot. He took the basic courses, and was satisfied with that. His scores on what he did do were good, though. I think if he had decided to pursue it, he would be at least as good as I am.”

Nikki said, “That’s pretty good, Janet. Do you really think Jim could have done it?’

“I’m pretty sure. I compared his scores to mine on the same tests. He was at least as good as me. He just doesn’t have the need to fly, like I do.”

Nunya said, “I’ve seen the scores, too. Jim’s are near the top.”

I replied, “I didn’t realize he was that good, either.”

Janet said, “I almost had him talked into trying some of the more complicated stuff, but then he met Hannah, and decided that wasn’t what he wanted to do.”

Nikki asked, “He’s happy where he is. That’s good enough. What were you figuring on doing today, Caveman?”

“I hadn’t thought about it much, to tell the truth.”

Topper came to the door and knocked. Ryder called, “Come on in, Captain.”

He did, and asked, “Boss, would you mind riding into town with us? I’m not sure they would be okay with me signing papers, even though I have standing with the company.”

“I don’t mind. Do you have any idea how long it might take?”

“By the time we get it titled, put plates on it, and get it insured, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was pushing lunchtime, Boss.”

I looked at Nikki. “Do you want to meet me at Julie’s for lunch?”
“Sounds like a plan. What are you going to do if you get done early? Go by Shady and give the old ladies rides in your shiny new car?”

“I doubt the Skipper’s plan has that much slack in it, Space Cadet. Besides, you’re the only lady I want to squire around in my new car.”

“I like the way you talk, Caveman.”

Topper and I went outside. Snitz wanted to go along. I had to lift him into the 6X6, there was no way he could jump that high. On the way in to town, Topper said, “Ruth found some old papers hidden in the seat cushions on that Ford, when she started working on upholstering it. They were too faded to make out what they said, but we sent them up to the Gene, to see if somebody there knew how to get the writing to show again.”

“Thanks, Skipper.”

“I’m on leave, Boss. Topper will do fine.”

“I’ll try and remember that. You know how hard I had to work to get used to it in the first place.”

“You’ve done well, staying on the same ship, and trying to respect the chain of command.”

“That’s nice of you to say. I still step on your toes more than I would like to.”

“Maybe so, but you’re getting better all the time.”

“Back to those papers. She wasn’t able to figure out anything about what they were?”

“No, not really. They were loose pages, and they had started out blank. There was something written on them in pencil, a long time ago, but weathering had pretty much erased it.”

“Let me know if you hear anything else. Even though it isn’t looking very good, I’d like to know the whole story of what happened to him.”

“If the crew finds anything, I’ll be sure you’re the first to know.”

“Thanks.”

They weren’t willing to title it as the same car that Grandpa had, since we didn’t have anything but a sale bill on that, and the band had pretty much built the car we had from scratch. They were willing to title it as a kit car, and we had to be satisfied with that. Our next stop was an inspection, and they passed it, no problem. Then we got plates. I was able to register it as an antique, even though it didn’t have many original parts. I didn’t expect to be driving it all that much. We went and got insurance, and the band took it off the truck. Topper handed me the keys. Then he got Snitz down out of the 6X6. He said, “Have fun with it, Boss. We had fun putting it together.”

“Not as much as you will with the next one, right?”

“Probably not. Rick said something about another one?”

“Dee mentioned something about it sounding like fun. I don’t know if she was serious about having you build her one, or not.”

“I’ll call her and ask. See you later, Boss.”

“Fly safe, Topper.”

“You too, Boss.”

He climbed back into the 6X6, and ‘Gear Jammer’ started playing. He pulled out, and headed for the Holler. I followed Snitz into the Deuce, and checked my watch. I had a little time before I needed to be at Julie’s for lunch. There was a park on the way, so we went and sat under a tree. I should have known we were in for trouble, when I saw the lady marching toward us with intent. I’m not sure why I didn’t.

She squared off in front of us. Snitz looked up at her, curious. She said, “You can’t have that dog here without a leash! It’s against the ordinance!”

I looked up at her, and replied, “Exactly what has he done to bother anyone? He’s been right here with me the whole time. I’m having trouble seeing what your issue is.”

“Are you deaf? I already told you it’s against the rules!”

“You’re not from around here, are you, Ma’am?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“Folks around here don’t pay much attention to rules that don’t do any good. I’m not sure how you managed to get an ordinance like that passed, but I doubt you have much luck enforcing it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you need to go tend to your own business, and leave us alone, since we’re just sitting here, not bothering anyone.”

“Who do you think you are, to speak to me like that?”

“I really don’t think you want to hear the answer to that, Ma’am.”

“Well, I never!”

I managed to keep my mouth shut. Snitz tapped out on my leg. “That much is obvious.”

Keeping a straight face after that was difficult, but I did the best I could.

She said, “I’m calling the police.”

“Please do.”

She elected to stay in my face the whole time we were waiting for the cops to show up. For once, things went the way I was hoping they would. Jack unfolded himself out of his cruiser, and walked over to where we were. He said, “What sort of trouble are you stirring up today, Mr. Wilson?”

I replied, “This nice lady here seems to think that Snitz and I are violating some ordinance about dogs needing to be on a leash in the park.”

“Well, the fact of the matter is, they did manage to pass that ordinance. It is, however, being litigated, and according to the judge, we’re not allowed to enforce it until the case is decided.”

“You’re saying that we’re legal, but only by a loophole?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

The lady spoke up. “Aren’t you going to arrest this man, Officer?”

“Ma’am, I couldn’t arrest this man, if I wanted to. He has diplomatic immunity. Not to mention his security would take a dim view of me cuffing and disarming him. I don’t doubt I would be stunned, before I even got my cuffs out.”

“What nonsense is that? What are you talking about, stunned? I don’t see any security!”

Jack visibly gathered his calm, and said, “Ma’am, that is one of the reasons his security is so effective. They have very good camouflage. George, would you please give her the show?”

George faded in, and said, “Ma’am, the Officer is correct. The Boss has diplomatic immunity, and your puny little ordinance would have no sway over him, even if it were enforceable.”

She looked down at me, sneering. “Just what country are you supposed to be from, if you have diplomatic immunity?”

I tried to remain calm. “You really are new around here, aren’t you, Ma’am. I’m not from a foreign country. I am the CEO of Bob’s Saucer Repair, and we have a treaty with the US Government that gives us sovereignty over a piece of ground outside town.”

“What kind of nonsense is that?”

George said, “The kind of nonsense that the best space fleet in this end of the galaxy stands ready to enforce, Ma’am.”

“Are you threatening me, you metal monstrosity?”

“Not at all. Just informing you of the facts.”

Jack said, “Ma’am, nothing George here has said could be construed as a threat. He was, as he said, informing you of the state of affairs. It may not be to your liking, but the fact remains that Admiral Wilson here has diplomatic immunity, and I wouldn’t be able to bother him, even if the ordinance you are citing was in force.”

I looked at my watch, and saw that we had wasted enough time that I was due at Julie’s. I started to get up. The lady asked, “Where do you think you’re going?”

“To lunch, with my family. We got done with our other business a little early, and came here to spend a few pleasant minutes while we waited for lunchtime.”

I saw Snitz out of the corner of my eye. He was heading for the lady. I said, “No, Snitz. That would be too much fun. Sorry, Buddy.”

He came back and stood by me. She asked, “What was that animal going to do?”

I said, “I can’t be sure, but given that he didn’t look as if he were trying to attack, I would say he thought that urinating on you would properly express his opinion.”

Jack said, “As you can see, Ma’am, the Admiral’s dog is well behaved, even if he is opinionated.”

The lady looked at Jack. “I’ll have your badge for this, Officer.”

George asked, “Will that be before, or after you stand trial for your outstanding warrants, Ma’am?”

Jack asked, “She has warrants?”

“Three that we’ve found so far. She seems to be fond of using different names in different states. That seems to be how she’s remained at large as long as she has.”

“What are these warrants for, George?”

“Assault on a police officer, inciting to riot, and one for grand larceny.”

“That sounds like a fine assortment. Would you mind texting me those?”

“Already done.”

The lady said, “Are you going to take this monster’s word? How do you know whatever he has isn’t totally made up?”

“I have worked with George before, and I know him to be trustworthy. I’m sure if there’s a mistake, which I doubt there will be, George and the Admiral will be more than happy to apologize.”

I said, “Of course. I doubt that will come up, though. George and the people he is talking with are very careful when it comes to things like this.”

Jack said, “I doubt it as well. Are you going to come along peaceably, Ma’am?”

“No, I am not going to submit to arrest on these trumped up charges.”

I had been paying attention to the conversation we had been having, and not the crowd that had gathered. One of them said, “Police brutality!”

I replied, “Jack hasn’t laid a finger on her, and he has the body cam footage to prove it. He’s going to take her into custody now, for her outstanding warrants. Would you prefer we ran records checks on all of you, while we are here? I’m sure at least a few of you have warrants outstanding.”

“What are you and your robot going to do against all of us? We’re taking her with us.”

George said, “Nope.”

The squad of Marines surrounding them, and the two fighters providing air cover, faded in. George continued, “In case you’re wondering, we already disabled the drones you had up to video the event.”

Jack asked, “How many of them have warrants, George?”

“All of them have some sort of warrant. The majority of them are only failure to appear, though.”

Jack turned to me. “Your outfit has been known to collect a bounty or two. Would you mind dealing with these folks?”

I looked at George. He said, “We can do it as a favor. None of them have enough money on them to make them worth the trouble.”

I said, “Go ahead and fix the Singer.”

“Make it sew, aye, Boss.”

A freighter came screaming out of the sky, and the protesters dropped, as they were stunned. The Marines went through the crowd, passing out nighty-nights. Once they had their badges, they were loaded onto the freighter. The Sergeant in charge said, “We’ll get these folks sorted out and delivered, Boss. Put the bounties in the usual account?”

“Unless your unit has a recreation fund. I don’t think there’s going to be enough money involved to make it worth running it through the company account.”

“We do now, Boss. Thanks!”

“You’re welcome, Sergeant.”

The ramp closed, and the freighter took off. The Marines assault ship came in to pick them up, and they flew away. Jack said, “Nicely done, Bob.”

“I have good people working for me.”

“That you do. Is that your Deuce sitting in the parking lot?”

“Yep. The band had to build it from scratch. The one we found in the woods was too far gone.”

“They do nice work.”

“Sure enough. You’ll have to take it for a drive, when you don’t have to work.”

“That sounds like fun.”

Snitz and I headed for the car.  I unlocked the door, and he jumped in. He sat in the seat next to me. Before I could start the car, he tapped out, “Should have let me pee.”

“I know. I was trying to keep Jack from getting in trouble.”

“Jack is good friend.”

“Yes, he is. You understand now?”

He nodded. I started the car, and we headed for the restaurant. I figured we would be late, but Nikki and the rest of the family were just going in when we got there. I rolled the window down a little for Snitz, and said, “I’ll see what I can do about a doggie bag, Buddy.”

He nodded, and I headed in. Julie asked, “Still running late, Bob?”

“Just like always, Julie. You expected any different?”

“No, I don’t suppose I did. Is anyone else coming?”

“You would do better to ask Nikki. I don’t know of anyone.”

“That’s what she said.”

“Well, then, there’s your answer.”

“Why don’t I believe it?”

“I don’t know. Sounds like a personal problem, to me.”

“Is that right? Go on, you!”

I went to the table where the rest of our bunch had sat down. Nikki said, “I would have thought you would have beaten us here, Caveman.”

“We would have, if we hadn’t stopped to enjoy the park.”

“You fell asleep?”

“Nope. I guess they’re trying to put in a city ordinance that you can’t have a dog in the park without a leash. A nice lady was kind enough to point it out to me.”

Janet said, “I wasn’t even paying attention, and I saw your tell, Dad. Try again.”

“Well, she was rather insistent about it. She called the cops. Lucky for me it was Jack who showed up. Turned out that she, and all the people she had backing her up, had paper out on them. The Marines are getting them sorted out, and collecting the bounties.”

Nikki asked, “A little help for the company account?”

“None of these folks had enough on their heads to make it worth putting in the company account. I told the Sergeant to start a recreation fund for his unit.”

Milly laughed, “Do you think that was a good idea, Tio?”

“I wouldn’t know about that. It seemed like the thing to do, at the time.”

Nikki said, “Oh no! Not one of those. Did you get the Deuce legal to drive?”

“We did. I promised Jack he could drive it when he was off duty.”

“That sounds like fun. Are we all going to get a turn?”

“That depends on whether the Skipper can come up with a double clutching course, so that you’ll be able to downshift into low gear.”

Nikki asked, “What now?”

“Older transmissions only had synchronizers on the higher gears. To get back into low gear, you have to make sure that everything is turning more or less the same speed, so that the gears don’t grind. Look on the bright side, though. It’s not a Land Rover. Some of the early ones didn’t have synchros on second, either.”

“I’ll take your word for it. I went ahead and ordered for you, I hope that’s all right.”

“That’s fine, but I told Snitz I would try and bring him a doggy bag. Maybe we should order him something else.”

“I usually have a little left over, and so does Becky. We can take him that, don’t you think?”

“Sounds right to me.”

Gus asked, “What do you think those Marines are going to do with a recreation fund, Dad?”

“I don’t have any idea. I have to think it’s better that way. Anything I don’t know about, I don’t have to take official notice of.”

Becky asked, “You think they’re going to get up to something bad?”

“I know them better than that. They might get up to things that I wouldn’t be able to officially sanction, even if they aren’t actually bad.”

Nikki said, “Your dad has to be careful of what he sees, so that he doesn’t have to crack down on things that might be technically wrong, but aren’t hurting anything.”

“Maybe I don’t want to be grown up as bad as I thought. That sounds complicated.”

I replied, “Sometimes it is. Once you get a feel for it, it’s not that bad.”

“If you say so.”

Our lunch arrived, and we dug in. After they finished, Nikki and Becky got a bag for Snitz’s leftovers. I took them out to him. Turned out he had rolled the window down the rest of the way, and was busy, keeping a fellow away from the car. I asked, “Something I could help you with?”

“I was just admiring the car. Your dog didn’t think that was something I should do.”

I replied, “Yeah, my crew did a nice job on it. Pity they couldn’t use more parts from the car we drug out of the woods, but it had been sitting and rusting a long time.”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“There are places that make replacement parts for these. They ordered enough parts to build a whole new car.”

“Wow! That must have cost a lot.”

“Not too bad, and I was already paying them, so the labor wasn’t a problem.”

“Would you be interested in selling?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

I didn’t know that Snitz knew how to point, like a hunting dog, but he was pointing at the rear fender on the driver’s side. I said, “Excuse me a second. He has something he wants me to look at.”

I went over and felt under the fender, and found the tracker the fellow Snitz had been barking at had planted. I turned around with it in my left hand, just in case he decided to get upset about me taking the tracker off the car. He tried to act innocent. “What’s that?”

I said, “The tracker you put on the car. Please don’t make this any harder than it has to be. I’m supposed to be taking a day off.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Snitz sat, and tapped my foot. “He put it there.”

I looked down at him, and said, “I figured that much out. You don’t bark at people for no reason.”

He nodded. The fellow must have thought I was distracted, because he went for his gun. Getting sped up in the autodoc kept it from being a fair fight, I suppose. I remembered Niner-Deuce telling me that if I found myself in a fair fight, my tactics sucked, so it didn’t bother me much. He looked surprised that I managed to get mine out first. I said, “This button switches it from stun to lethal. Do you want to give me an excuse to use it?”

“No, I don’t.”

“Who do you work for, then?”

“You know I can’t tell you that.”

“You could, you just choose not to. Not the same thing at all.”

“No matter how much you paid me, I wouldn’t live long enough to spend it.”

“I have tech people good enough to trace the components in this tracker, and get a pretty good idea where it came from. I have hackers who can get ahold of the records, and figure out who bought it. I’m thinking that would give me a good idea of who you work for. It would be simpler if you would just tell me what’s going on, though.”

“I’m sure it would be, but I’m not at liberty to say.”

“Oh, you work for the government. That’s nice to know. I thought we were on good terms. Did that mess with the Chinese Ambassador change something?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t work for the government.”

I laughed. “They didn’t brief you very well. Nearly everyone who works here has been trained in cold reading. You’re not even that good a liar.”

George faded in. “Have you had enough fun with this one, Boss?”

“I think so. He doesn’t seem to be too cooperative. Seems to be under the impression that he needs to fear the people he works for, more than he needs to fear BSR. I don’t feel like going to the trouble it would take to convince him otherwise. They wouldn’t tell a flunky like him enough to make it worth my time to interrogate him.”

The fellow who belonged to the tracker said, “Now wait a minute! I’m no flunky!”

I looked over at George. “Ain’t they cute, when they’re still that dumb?”

“They are, Boss, but I can only take so much of it. Where would you like him delivered?”

“The White House lawn sounds about right. Leave his pants on the flag pole on top of the place.”

The fellow was beginning to get agitated. Ringo faded in behind him, and grabbed his arms. Ringo said, “Don’t get excited, Sir. We wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself.”

“Let go of me.”

“I’m sorry, Sir, but that’s not going to happen for a bit yet. You heard the Boss’s delivery instructions, didn’t you?”

“I did.”

A freighter faded in, sitting in the corner of the parking lot. A pair of Marines got out, and walked over. One of them asked, “Any special instructions, Boss?”

“Oh, look through his pockets. I doubt he’s dumb enough to carry ID, but you never can tell with these types.”

They searched him, while Ringo kept him from interfering. One of them said, “Oh, my! Boss, you’ve caught a real live G-man. Federal Bureau of Investigation.”

“Well, I suppose I’d better speak with the President about this one. I figured he was out of one of those black projects that barely have any oversight.”

I got out my comm, and dialed the President. The fellow who answered the phone put me right through. The President answered, “Yes, Admiral? How can I help you today?”

“Well, I found an FBI agent putting a tracker on my new car. I didn’t think we were playing that sort of game any more.”

“I didn’t either. Do you have a name?”

The Marine handed me the ID, and I read off the name. The President said, “Do you mind if I check into this, and call you back? I assure you, he’s not operating under orders from me.”

“I’m glad to hear that. I would appreciate any light you can shed on the matter, though. I’ll look forward to your call.”

“I should have an answer for you soon, Admiral.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. The Marine asked, “Do you still want us to deliver him the way you said before, Boss?”

“Just put a nighty-night on him, and we’ll figure out just how we want to send him back when the President calls back.”

“Will do, Boss. Did you want us to take that tracker with us?”

“Might as well. I’m tempted to carry it with me, just to see what they had in mind, but I’m sure somebody would consider that having too much fun.”

George said, “I’m sure Sally would frown on it, and I doubt Mrs. Wilson would be too psyched, either.”

I handed the tracker to the Marine, and asked, “Do you mind giving the car a good scan, while you’re into it, just to be sure?”

“No problem, Boss.”

He went over the car, and said, “It’s clean, Boss.”

“Thanks.”

They took the prisoner to the freighter, and took off. Ringo and George faded out. Nikki and the kids had been watching, and they came over to see what all the fuss was about. Nikki asked, “What was that, Caveman?”

“Snitz caught that fella putting a tracker on the car.”

Gus said, “That’s not all there was to it, Dad. We saw you on the comm to somebody.”

“He was carrying what looked like FBI credentials. I called the President to see if we had done something to whiz him off. He sounded like we are still cool with him.”

Nikki asked, “What are you going to do with that guy?”

“I thought I would wait to make up my mind, until the President decides whether he’s going to claim him or not.”

“You’re not going to make a show out of him?”

“I never said that. If I get the chance, I probably will. I just don’t want to screw up the more or less friendly relationship we have with the US Government, just to have a little fun.”

“Understandable. Are you headed home?”

“I think so. How about you?”

“I wanted to do some shopping. I don’t think Gus is too crazy about the idea, though.”

“There’s plenty of room in the Deuce, if he wants to ride back with me.”

Gus asked, “Can I?”

“Sure, Son. Get in, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

I kissed Nikki. “See you later, then.”

“You sure will.”

She and Becky went to get into the Yukon. Snitz and I got into the Deuce, and I headed home.

Gus asked, “What is it about this old car you like, Dad?”

“I don’t know for sure, Short Round. I think just because it’s something different, that I haven’t gotten to drive before.”

“You mean you’re getting to learn things?”

“I guess so. Maybe we’re not that much different, huh?”

“Maybe not. This is a little more involved than one of my airplanes, though.”

“That it is. I didn’t build it though. I’m just enjoying what Topper and the band did.”

“I heard you talking the other day. Do you really think that great-grandpa was a bad guy?”

“I don’t want to, that’s for sure. The evidence I’ve seen so far seems to point that way. I wish I had another way to interpret what I’m seeing, but so far, I haven’t come up with anything that makes sense to me.”

“I hope you do come up with something. You don’t look happy when you think about it.”

“Well, I hope so too. Nothing I can do to change the past, though, and I wouldn’t want to, if I could.”

“Why is that?”

“You never would be able to tell what else you might change, when you made one little change in the past.”

“You really think big things could change, just from one little thing you changed in the past?”

“Well, if Grandpa really was a bad guy, and I went back and changed things so that he wasn’t, he would live longer, until my mom was a teenager. What if he didn’t like my dad, when he came to take her out for a date? Mom might have married somebody else, and I would have never been. I know that wouldn’t have that much of an effect on the world, but I don’t like the sound of it, personally.”

“I can see how you wouldn’t. If there was no you, then I wouldn’t be here either.”

“That’s the way it works.”

“I’m beginning to see why you don’t want to mess with time travel.”

“It worked out okay with the Boatmen, but that was an accident, and I don’t have any reason to think we would be that lucky a second time.”

“Nope. Our shepherd wouldn’t let that happen.”

We got home, and went into the house. Tom wanted me to play with him. Apparently Julie didn’t know all his tickle spots, or something like that. When he was settled down, Gus asked, “Do you want to go out and drive for a while, Dad?”

“Sure.”

We went and did that until we saw the Yukon pull in. Then we parked our vehicles, and went to see what they had found with all their shopping. It turned out they hadn’t found much, or rather, they had found things they liked, and taken pictures so that Scotti could turn out copies in tougher fabric. We helped them carry what they had bought, and went inside. Ryder said, “I hope you were planning on staying in for supper this evening. I hadn’t heard anyone say anything about going out.”

Nikki said, “That sounds wonderful! I don’t know whether the girls were planning on being here to eat, or not.”

Ryder replied, “I spoke with Janet, and she said that they were on their way here.”

“That’s great! We haven’t sat down with just us for a meal in several days.”

Ryder had fixed a wonderful meal, and we all complimented her on it. After supper, I helped the girls with the dishes. Janet said, “We had fun today, but we’re running out of things to do.”

I asked, “What would you like to do, then?”

Nunya said, “I don’t know. I don’t think we want to go to Springfield anymore for a while. We saw some people protesting BSR. We avoided them, but they looked like they wanted to cause us trouble.”

“That doesn’t sound good at all. Were you able to figure out why they didn’t like the company?”

“Some nonsense about taking care of Earth, before we went to the stars. Don’t they realize that moving industry off the planet will help clean it up?”

“I’m not sure what those people are thinking. Sometimes, I wonder if they’re thinking.”

Milly said, “I saw something I didn’t understand. There was somebody paying the protesters.”

“Giving them money for raising a fuss? I’ve heard about things like that, but I never expected to be on the receiving end.”

“That’s what I saw, Tio. Those two were busy looking at some boy.”

Janet said, “He was hot!”

Nunya said, “He could have stood to be a little taller.”

Janet replied, “You’re prejudiced.”

“Could be.”

We went into the living room, but what Milly had said was bothering me. I went back to the kitchen and took out my comm. Wobbles answered, “Hey, Admiral. Something I can do for you this evening?”

“I need to ask a couple of questions, if you have time.”

“Sure. It’s my supper break. What do you need to know?”

“The girls were in Springfield today, and they came back saying that they had seen protesters against BSR.”

“Yes, I’ve seen them too. I’ve yet to figure out why they think they have a beef with the company, though.”

“Milly said she saw someone paying them. Does that track with what you’ve seen?”

“It would make more sense than anything we’ve come up with. You’re thinking they’re some kind of rent-a-mob?”

“That would track with the people who accosted me in the park today. Luckily, we were able to find warrants on all of those, so we didn’t have to let any of them go.”

“I know your ability to search records is better than what the department has, Admiral. Would it be too much to ask to have your crew look for people with warrants in the protests we’re having?”

“That would be no trouble at all. It might take a day or two. I don’t know how well they’re scanning the people around the girls when they go out.”

“We’ll take any help we can get. The Chamber of Commerce really doesn’t like having to put up with them. They’re bad for business, don’t you know?”

“I can see how that would be. I wouldn’t want to have to face a mob like that, if I didn’t have to.”

“Especially when it’s so easy to stay home and shop online.”

“Yep. I’ll get the fleet started on finding out something about those folks. Thanks for the info.”

“I didn’t have much to tell, but you’re welcome.”

“Every little bit helps. Be safe out there.”

“Fly safe, Admiral.”

The line went dead, and I commed Saucy. “Hey, Boss! What can we do for you?”

“Well, the girls saw some protesters in Springfield today. I was wondering if you could look into them, and see if any of them have outstanding warrants.”

“Sorry to disappoint, Boss. Most of them have piddly little warrants. None of them are what you would call outstanding.”

“You’re saying you’ve already looked them over, and most of them are fugitives?”

“No, I’m saying we’ve already looked at them, and all of them at least have a failure to appear that we could pick them up on.”

“You were tracking the girls today?”

“We were. After they almost got roofied, we’ve been paying more attention when they go out.”

“Good plan. Milly said something about seeing the protesters getting paid. Did you happen to get an ID on the money man?”

“We did, though it was a lady doing the paying. She had some hired muscle to make sure no one took more than their share.”

“I see. I don’t suppose we were lucky enough that she has paper out?”

“No, Boss. We are tracking her, though. She was very upset when she found out that the whole operation that came after you in the park was being turned in on their warrants. She seems to think that they aren’t good enough at what they do to be worth the bail money it will take to get them back on the streets.”

“At least we won’t have to worry about frequent fliers.”

“Don’t be too sure about that, Boss. I said thought that, not that she was going to act on it. Apparently there are people higher in the organization with a different opinion.”

“Lovely. Gather up everyone with paper, and get them where they belong.”

“Rewards to go to the Marines’ Recreation Fund again?”

“I don’t see why not. There aren’t any big fish in this bunch, are there?”

“No, Boss. Small timers, the lot of them.”

“That sounds fine, then.”

“Did you need anything else?”

“I can’t think of anything. Thanks, Saucy.”

“You’re welcome, Boss. Fly safe.”

“You too, Saucy.”

The line went dead, and I decided I should probably call Wobbles back, and tell him what was going on.

He answered, “Officer Wobbles.”

“It’s the Admiral again. I just wanted to let you know that we found warrants on all those street protesters. The Marines will be picking them up, shortly. We weren’t able to come up with anything on the lady who is paying them, though.”

“You’re saying there may be another bunch of them in a day or two?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Well, at least we get a couple days of peace and quiet. Thanks, Admiral.”

“You’re welcome, Wobbles.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. I went back to play with the kids. Nikki asked, “Did you get all that squared away, Caveman?”

“I think so. It sounds like there will be a lot fewer protesters in Springfield by morning.”

Janet asked, “Won’t they just bring in more of them?”

“Probably. I’m sure Saucy has somebody watching the person who was paying this bunch, to see where the next bunch is coming from, so that we can read their IDs, and collect them before they show up.”

Nunya asked, “Why do you think they’re trying to cause trouble for us?”

I replied, “I’m not sure about that, not at all. I don’t doubt we’ll find out soon, though.”

Nikki asked, “You think they’re going to try something more direct?”

“I really don’t know what to think. I do wonder whether that FBI fellow who tried to put the tracker on the Ford is involved with the same effort, or we have two bunches of people trying to cause us trouble.”

Milly asked, “Are you growing a beard, Tio?

“You think I’ve given up my razor?”

“It sounds that way.”

“You think it’s all part of one plot, then?”

“It’s the way to bet, don’t you think?”

“As a matter of fact, I do. Just because it’s the most likely scenario, that doesn’t mean it’s the only possible way it could happen, though.”

“You think we need to plan for both cases?”

“I don’t think we need to plan for much of anything, yet. No more organized than this bunch seems to be, I don’t think the Marines are going to have any trouble keeping them from being much of a problem for us.”

Nikki asked, “Do you think we need to stay in the Holler for now?”

“Maybe tonight, until the Marines get those protesters gathered up, and turned in for their rewards. After that, I doubt there is much need.”

Janet said, “We can do that.”

Bedtime rolled around, and I put the younger ones to bed. Then Snitz and I went out to patrol his yard. He didn’t find much, until the wind shifted. Then he alerted on a smell coming from the woods. I whispered, “What does he smell, George?”

George whispered back, “We’re checking on it, Boss. No one is classifying it as a threat, so far. Whoever it is seems to be making their way toward the house, though.”

“You’re saying it’s a human?”

“Human, yes. We’ve yet to get a good enough read to tell if they’re from Earth, or the Commonwealth.”

“Let’s find out.”

I called out, in Commonwealth, “Come on in, we see you out there.”

The voice that called in response sounded old and weak. “I’m coming as fast as I can.”

I noticed they sounded as if they were unused to speaking Commonwealth. It reminded me of someone when they first took the training course to be able to speak Commonwealth. A thought crossed my mind, and I tried again in English. “Are you more comfortable with English?”

“Yessir, I am. I’ve been marooned here for a long time.”

“I thought we had found all the saucer wrecks on Earth.”

“You very well may have. The saucer that brought me here just dropped me off, and never came back.”

“You didn’t have a comm, to call for help?”

“They took it away from me, before they threw me out.”

She made it to the edge of the woods, and I could see she was having trouble getting around. I wondered how she had made it through the woods, in that shape. I asked, “Did you have help, getting here?”

“A nice fellow dropped me off, on the other side of the woods. It was as close as I could get a ride.”

“I see. You look like you could use a spell in the autodoc.”

“I surely could.”

“You’re having a hard time getting around, aren’t you?”

“I am. The walk through the woods has my hip acting up.”

“Would you mind if we gave you some help, getting to the autodoc?”

“That would be great! Do you have a wheelchair?”

“No, but I think we can do about as well.”

A Marine faded in next to her. He asked, “Would you mind if I carried you, Ma’am?”

“Not at all. How did you know what to do? He didn’t give you any orders.”

“Ma’am, we’re outside the Commonwealth. The Limiter Laws don’t apply here.”

“Huh? Oh! You don’t have a limiter?”

“No, Ma’am, I do not. Is that going to be a problem?”

“I don’t think so.”

“May I pick you up now?”

“Yes, please.”

The Marine gently scooped her up, and started toward the barn. He asked, “Would you like her aboard the Evans, Boss?”

“Yes, please. We can always take her to the Gene, if she needs something the box on the Evans can’t handle. I’d better come along and make sure the box knows what she needs.”

“Might be best. You organics understand things like that better than we do.”

“Got to be good for something, don’t we?”

“Don’t sell yourself short, Boss. You’re nearly always good for a giggle.”

The lady asked, “You let this bot talk to you that way?”

“Why not? It ain’t nothin’ but the truth.”

She shook her head. “Things sure have changed since I got stuck here.”

I replied, “They haven’t changed that much where you come from. We do things differently around here, though.”

“You surely do.”

Nikki was standing on the porch. She asked, “What did you find, Caveman?”

“A marooned traveler, so she says. Some saucer crew left her behind, when they came to Earth.”

“That’s terrible! Where are you taking her?”

“She needs some time in the box. She’s been marooned for a while.”

“Do you need some help?”

“I don’t know, but you might as well come along. No telling what the box is going to find wrong with her.”

“You can always call John.”

“I figure I’m going to have to do that before this is over with.”

Nikki came to the barn with us. Eve already had the ramp down. The old lady was looking around. “Nice looking ship. Your outfit must be doing well, to keep it up like this.”

Nikki said, “You haven’t seen anything yet. Wait ‘til you see the Gene.”

“If you say so. Say, your man here never introduced himself. I’m Nelly Miller, at least that’s what I’ve been going by for years.”

Nikki replied, “I’m Nikki Wilson, and the big lug there is Bob.”

“Your voice sounds a little like home.”

“I’m not from around here, either. It’s a long story, I can catch you up when you’re feeling better.”

“I look forward to it.”

We got to medbay, and the bot laid her in the box. She asked, “Don’t I need to get undressed?”

I replied, “No, Ma’am. Our medical fella figured out how to get it to work around your clothes.”

“That’s handy.”

“It sure is. See you when you wake up.”

“Thanks.”

I closed the lid, and looked at the control panel. She had a lot of bad indicators, but they were all related to being old. Nothing looked like an injury, or illness. The box offered to start her on a standard rejuve, and I hit the button for it to start. The timer said she would be ready to wake up sometime the next morning. I looked at Nikki and asked, “Isn’t that quick, for how bad off she was?”

“She’s been through the box before. It left a file encoded of what needed to be done, so that this machine won’t have to figure everything out. It’s standard practice in the Commonwealth. As a matter of fact, you don’t have to spend as long inside as you did the first time you went in.”

“I guess I don’t. I try not to collect too many data points, though.”

“We’re all glad of that.”

I turned to the Marine. “Would you mind standing guard? I doubt she has much in the way of bad intentions, but with everything that’s been going on lately, I’d rather not take a chance.”

“Sure, Boss. You think she’s going to wake up feisty?”

“I don’t know, and I don’t want to have to chase the Evans halfway across the galaxy, if she does.”

Eve said, “I have better security than that, Boss.”

“Anything one shaved ape can figure out, another one can figure a way around.”

“Good thing Gene is the one who helped me with my security, then.”

“Good answer, dangit! Call me if you need anything.”

“Will do, Boss.”

Nikki and I walked down the ramp, and out of the barn. I heard the ramp and the doors closing behind us. Nikki asked, “Aren’t you going to call John?”

“I’m waiting. I think he has an alarm set up, so that he gets notified whenever someone uses an autodoc on the Evans. I’d like to know for sure.”

“Couldn’t you just ask Eve?”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Oh, you’re going to be that way about it.”

“Is that a problem?”

“That depends. How long are you going to wait for John to call, before you give up and call him?”

“Give it another minute or two, and then I’ll call him.”

My comm rang. Luckily, I looked at the caller ID before I answered. “Yes, Mr. President?”

“Admiral, we’ve gone through all our records, and we don’t have a present or former FBI agent by the name you gave us. I had them go over the records a second time, just to be sure.”

“Thank you for taking the trouble. I’ll have my people look at his ID. It looked okay to me, but I’ll have my people go over it, and see what they can learn. I’ll let you know what we find out about him.”

“Thanks for that. Have a good evening, Admiral.”

“You too, Mr. President.”

The line went dead momentarily, until the comm switched to John’s call. “Hey, Bob. Who were you talking to?”

“We ran into a supposed FBI agent in town. The President just got back to me. They don’t have any record of him.”

“That’s odd.”

“It is. I’m going to have the crew go over that ID, and see if they can figure out how he might have come by it. That’s not what you called about though, is it?”

“No, I wondered who you put in the autodoc.”

“Tell me, is it just the Evans that reports autodoc usage to you?”

“No. I get reports from all the ships in the fleet. The Evans and Taz’s Revenge do get a priority marker when they come in, though.”

“She wandered in out of the woods, claiming that she had gotten marooned on Earth several years ago. Whoever gave her a ride here dumped her off, and didn’t come back to pick her up. They didn’t leave her a comm to call help, either.”

“That doesn’t sound neighborly at all.”

“It doesn’t, does it? I’m sure she’ll have more of a story to tell when she comes out of the box in the morning.”

“That would be the way to bet. Would you mind if I came over for that?”

“Not at all.”

“See you then.”

“See you.”

The line went dead, and no other calls switched in, this time. I put it away, and looked at Nikki. She asked, “What did he say about the reports?”

“He says he gets a report whenever an autodoc is used in the fleet, but the ships that I use regularly get a priority notice when they come in.”

“That sounds about right. Let’s go to bed.”

“Sounds like a good idea. Tomorrow might be a big day.”

We went inside, and I checked to make sure the house was secure. With some new outfit taking a run at the company, I didn’t want to take any chances. I got ready, and snuggled in with Nikki. She asked, “Have you heard anything from those scouts?”

“I have not. I don’t know whether that’s because they haven’t reported, or because Johnny Five doesn’t think there’s anything in their reports that I need to know about right away.”

“You think we’re going to have to run back out that way, don’t you?”

“I wouldn’t say I think that, not until I have some data to work with. I am getting a feeling that we are, though.”

“Should I alert the fleet?”

“They all know that anytime I spend this much time on a planet, we’re going to get called out in a hurry when it ends. I doubt you could get them any readier than they already are.”

“When you put it that way, I have to agree with you. Was there anything else on your mind?”

“I could think of a thing or two, maybe.”

“Maybe, huh? Maybe I have a headache.”

“Do you need a massage?”

“You always know the right thing to say, dangit!”

Snitz was on time the next morning. I got ready to face the day, and we went out to check on the yard. Ryder handed me my coffee on the way out the door. Snitz didn’t find anything out of the ordinary, so we went back to the porch to wait for the rest of the house to wake up. George faded in, and said, “We found something on the Earth news that you might be interested in, Boss.”

“What’s that, George?”

“An old folks home a couple of towns over reports one of their residents wandered off yesterday. The photo that they’re showing matches the lady you put in the box last night.”

“So far, you haven’t told me anything surprising. I am curious how it took her so long to figure out how to slip out and come see us.”

“It seems she said a few things that she shouldn’t have, and the locals thought she had Alzheimer’s. They had her in a locked unit, and this was the first time that she had an opportunity to get free.”

“You’re telling me that she broke out of the unit, and made it this far?”

“That’s the way it seems, Boss.”

“I don’t suppose we have any scanner records that would be able to back up that story, do we?”

“No, Boss. We didn’t have any reason to be keeping an eye on that particular region. We can’t watch the whole planet, you know.”

“I do. If anyone had a reason to suspect there was anything interesting going on there, it would have been wired like a pinball machine, but we had no way to know that a Commonwealth citizen was being held against her will, did we?”

“Not a clue, Boss. Do you think she will want to head back to the Commonwealth?”

“I don’t have any idea, George. I’m guessing she’ll have a lot more to say once she wakes up, later today.”

“Do you think we need to let them know they can call off the hunt for their missing patient?”

“Might be best, I suppose. Is there a number to call, if you have information?”

“There is.”

I got out my comm, and George read the number to me, while I dialed. “Sheriff’s Office. How may I help you?”

“I have some information on the missing lady from the nursing home.”

“Did you see her?”

“I did, and I spoke with her.”

“Where are you located, Sir?”

“Saucer Holler.”

“Excuse me?”

“Saucer Holler. You know, the area that the government let BSR have sovereignty over?”

“Yes, I know what you’re talking about. Would you be willing to return the lady to us?”

“I doubt she’s going to want to come back to the nursing home, once she gets out of the autodoc. It’s fixing her mind for her, so I don’t think there will be any need of that, anyway.”

“You’re saying that she wandered into Saucer Holler, and you put her in one of your healing machines?”

“I am.”

“Just who am I speaking with?”

“Admiral Bob Wilson.”

“Is that right? Who plays fiddle in the Allbot Brothers, then?”

“You’re thinking of the Dire Curves, Ma’am. Their fiddle player is a bot called Bone.”

“Ozzie sure is good on the drums.”

“Ozzie plays bass. Taz plays the drums. Ruth plays the keyboard.”

“You sound like you might be legit, but I need something more solid before we call off this search.”

“Would a video of Nelly coming out of the woods at my place be good enough for you?”

“You have a video?”

“I’m sure my Marines were recording when she wandered out of the woods. I’ll have one of them send you the file.”

“What did you say the lady’s name was?”

“She told us she was Nelly Miller. Is that not the lady you were looking for?”

“No, that’s her, sure enough. I just got the video file. Do you mind holding on, while I have a look?”

“I don’t mind at all.”

After a minute or two, she came back on the line. “That’s her, sure enough. Thanks for letting us know what’s going on.”

“No problem. I would have gotten ahold of you sooner, if I had realized someone was looking for her.”

“Thanks all the same. Have a good one.”

“You too.”

I put the comm away. I looked back at George. “Thanks for having that file sent.”

“All part of the service, Boss.”

I scratched Snitz, and sipped my coffee. George faded out, and I sat quietly, until Milly brought her coffee out and sat down. I asked, “How are you this morning?”

“I’m doing fine. Was there some excitement last night?”

“Not really. An old lady came wandering out of the woods, and we stuck her in the autodoc. Nothing much.”

“How did she get here?”

“As near as I could tell from what she said, she caught an ride to the other side of the woods, and made her way across country.”

“Sounds like a tough old bird.”

“That was the impression I got. Do you want to be there when we wake her up?”

“I’m not sure what I could do.”

“The way she talked, somebody from the Commonwealth dumped her here, with no way home, several years ago. She’s going to need some kind of friend, while she gets used to being back in civilization.”

“You think she’s going to want to go home again?”

“I don’t know. She very well might. She might have other ideas. I don’t have any way to know.”

My comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Bob, it’s Jack. I need to ask you a few questions, please.”

“Ask away, Jack.”

“The department got a call from the Sheriff’s Office in the next county over.”

“Something about an old lady who ran away from a nursing home?”

“Yes.”

“I have her in the autodoc. Are you in uniform?”

“No, my shift doesn’t start for a while yet.”

“She claims she’s not from around here. Says she was marooned here with no way home, several years ago. I’m hoping she has some way to prove her story when she wakes up.”

“Wouldn’t Bill Rottum have records of someone like that?”

“I don’t know. He told me once that we had located everyone that was lost on Earth. If he knew about her, he would have had us hunt her down back then.”

“It still might be worth checking with him, Bob. She might be listed as ‘presumed dead’ or something.”

“You’re right. I was getting ready for bed when she showed up last night, and I didn’t think things through. George had to tell me that they were looking for her this morning, so I would call in and tell them that she was alright.”

“The Sheriff just wanted me to make sure that it really was you who called it in.”

“It was.”

“Thanks, Bob.”

“No problem, Jack.”

The line went dead, and I called Bill Rottum. “Morning, Bob. How are you going to crap in my oatmeal this morning?”

“I don’t know that I am. We collected a lady last night who claimed that she was purposefully marooned here several years ago. She claims to be a Commonwealth citizen. She does speak Commonwealth, but you can tell it’s been a long time since she spoke it on a regular basis.”

“Do you have an ID on her?”

“Query the autodoc on the Evans. That’s where she is now.”

“I can do that. I’ll let you know if we have a file on her.”

“Thanks, Bill.”

“Anytime, Bob.”

I put the comm away, and Milly said, “Busy morning, for being on leave.”

“Seems that way. How are things with you?”

“I’m doing alright. Still trying to make time with Brook, but that doesn’t seem to be going as well as I’d like.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, I’m not sure. I was hoping you could give me some of that sage advice you’re famous for.”

“You must have me confused with someone else. Are you treating her with respect?”

“I am.”

“Is she treating you with respect?”

“I’m not so sure about that one.”

“I think you need to figure that one out, before you go any further. If she doesn’t respect you, it isn’t going to work out, no matter how hard you try.”

“You always say to do the hard thing, and that will be the right thing. I was hoping for an ‘easy tracer method’, I guess.”

“I don’t think there is one of those for relationships.”

“I was afraid you were going to say that.”

Ryder came to the door and told us that breakfast was ready. We went in and ate. About the time the dishes were done, my comm beeped. It was an alarm, not the tone it made for an incoming message. I dried my hands and looked at it. It was time for Nelly to wake up. I heard gravel crunch in the driveway, and looked out to see John pulling in. I said, “Anybody who needs to be there when Nelly wakes up, head for the Evans.”

Nikki and Milly followed me to the barn. John was already aboard the Evans, looking things over. He was about to open the box, when my comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Bob, it’s Bill. We found the record on that lady you’ve got in the box.”

“Just a moment, let me put you on speaker.” I did so, and said, “Go ahead, Bill.”

“Like I was saying, we found the record having to do with the lady you have in the box. She was listed as killed on Earth by native wildlife. It looks like the investigating officer didn’t bother to go look for her remains, and just accepted the report from the other people who were with her at the time. There appears to have been rather a large inheritance involved, I would have thought he would have been more thorough.”

“Are you saying money changed hands, Bill?”

“I was trying very hard not to say that, with no more evidence than we have, but it looks that way, yes.”

Nikki said, “We never find anything simple, do we?”

Bill replied, “We don’t seem to, anyway. By the way, her real name is Nellicious Millorum.”

I replied, “I can see why she shortened it. Do you mind staying on the line while she wakes up, in case she has questions?”

“I don’t mind.”

John looked at me, and I nodded. He hit the button to wake her up. The lid came up, and slowly, Nelly came back to consciousness. She said, “I’m not crazy! I don’t need that shot!”

John said, “I don’t care if you’re crazy or not, I’m not administering drugs to a healthy patient. Wake up and quit fussing.”

Something about his voice got her attention, and she took a look around herself. She looked at me, and asked, “That wasn’t a dream?”

I replied, “No, Ma’am, it was not. I even smoothed things over with the place you broke out of. You’re free and clear, but from what the Patrol records say, the people who marooned you did you out of a bunch of money. I’ve got the fellow who found the records on the comm, if you want to check.”

“I’ll worry about that later. It’s nice just to be around people who believe that I’m not from around here.”

Nikki said, “Well, we have that much in common. I’m not either. For that matter, neither is Milly, here.”

“But you live here?”

“Like I said last night, it’s a long story. Surely you’re hungry, after the box did that much work on you.”

“I am, now that you mention it. Do you have any ration bars?”

“We do, but surely you’ve developed an appetite for Earth food, as long as you’ve been here, haven’t you?”

“I don’t want to put you to any trouble.”

I said, “It won’t be any trouble. Ryder loves to cook.”

“If you’re sure.”

I replied, “I’m sure.”

Bill said, “If you don’t need anything else, Bob, it sounds like you’ve got things under control.”

“Seems that way. Thanks, Bill.”

“All part of the service.” The line went dead, and I put the comm away.

We all went in the house, and Ryder served her up a plate. Nelly said, “This looks very nice. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Ma’am. I hope you enjoy it.”

“She seems a little different.”

I replied, “We went over this last night. You’re not in Commonwealth territory, so the Limiter Laws don’t apply.”

“Earth is a Commonwealth protectorate, though.”

“Not any more. We made the trip, and told them to go away.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You know that law that says a protectorate can petition to become a full member, if they can make it to Tantrum in a ship of their own manufacture?”

“I’ve heard of, it, yes.”

“There’s another clause in it that says the protectorate also has the option to tell the Commonwealth ‘no thanks’. That was the option I used.”

“You went to Tantrum, in a locally manufactured ship?”

“I did. Long trip, not much fun.”

“Didn’t they keep you waiting a long time?”

“That was another clause they didn’t realize was in the law. They only had a week to answer our petition, or it was granted by default. None of them realized that loophole was in the law. They tried to put us off, and it worked in our favor.”

“You sound more than a little tricky, Mr. Wilson.”

Nikki said, “He is that.”

Once Nelly got around her meal, Milly asked, “What are your plans, now that you’re back in contact with high tech?”

“I don’t really know. I suppose I should see what I could do about punishing those folks who left me here, but I don’t know if it would be worth the effort.”

Janet asked, “Why is that? Dad said there was a large sum of money involved. Don’t you want that back?”

“Your dad isn’t the only tricky one around, you know? They got a chunk of money, sure. They didn’t get anywhere near all of it.”

Nikki asked, “You had some stashed that they couldn’t get to?”

“Most of what I had. I figured they would try something, sooner or later.”

I said, “I’m sure we can set you up with a ride back to wherever you need to go.”

“I won’t have access to funds until I get back. You would trust me that far?”

“I don’t think a ride back into the Commonwealth is worth all that much. Were you thinking we would sell you a saucer, and let you pay for it later?”

“Thinking might be too strong a word. Hoping would be closer to the truth.”

“Let me make a comm call, and then I’ll be able to tell you what we might be willing to do.”

“That seems fair enough.”

I stepped into the other room, and got out my comm. I called Bill Rottum. “Morning, Bob. What can I do for you?”

“That lady we just woke up is claiming the people who marooned her didn’t get all her money, and she would like a ride into the Commonwealth to go collect what she had hidden. Do you think she would be a good credit risk?”

“If she isn’t, I don’t know who would be. We checked into her history a little closer. She has a reputation for honest dealing, above and beyond what one would expect from a normal Commonwealth businessperson.”

“You’re saying I should just give her a saucer, and not worry about it?”

“Get her signature on an agreement to pay for it, and you’ll be fine.”

“Thanks, Bill.”

“All part of the service.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. I went back into the kitchen, and said, “Well, Nikki’s father-in-law thinks you’re a good credit risk. I’ll see what we have on hand that we could sell you.”

Nelly looked at Nikki, and asked, “Why does your father-in-law’s opinion carry so much weight?”

“It isn’t so much his opinion, as the records he has access to. He used to be the Patrol commander in this system. Bob hired him, when the company took control of the system, and he does the same job he used to. He still has enough connections in the Patrol to access their records when he needs to. If he says you’re clean, that means the Patrol doesn’t have anything on you.”

“I understand, now. Who is he going to call next?”

“My dad, probably. He’s in charge of buying and selling saucers.”

“You folks run a used saucer dealership?”

“We do. The bots like to work on saucers, so we refurbish them, and sell them for a profit.”

“I don’t suppose there’s any chance of getting something sporty, is there?”

Janet asked, “Do you mean something with good performance, or something that looks fancy?”

“I was thinking of performance, but I wouldn’t mind something that looked nice.”

Janet answered, “That might take a little longer. Our trading stock is all pretty plain looking. I’m sure the band could fix you something up that would fill your needs, though.”

Nunya said, “It would cost a little extra, but it would be worth it to get what you want, wouldn’t it?”

Nelly looked at me. “What is it going to take for me to get rescued from your expert sales staff?”

“Let me get on the horn with Max, and see what he has in stock. He can bring some over, and you can choose what you want. If you need custom touches, we can take it down to the shop, and get the band started on it.”

“You don’t seem to be too worried about my ability to pay.”

“You seem to think you can handle whatever we might charge. I don’t see any evidence that you’re trying to deceive us, so I have to think that unless the people who did you dirty figured out a way to access your secret account, you’ll have the funds available to fulfill your commitments. I have better things to worry about than whether you’re going to be able to pay for one saucer, or not.”

“You’re not worried that I will take off with the saucer, and never be seen again?”

“Bill said you have a reputation for fair dealing. I doubt you have changed that much, while you’ve been marooned.”

“Your people are thorough.”

“I have good people working for me.”

Nikki said, “He figures the worst case isn’t that bad for the company, Nelly.”

“What do you mean?”

“The worst that could happen is you get back and find your secret account cleaned out. At that point he would have to repossess the saucer, and you would be needing a source of income. He would be able to hire you to work for the company, and he seems to think that would be a good thing.”

“You can tell that much?”

“I know how he thinks.”

Nelly looked at me. “Is she right?”

“That sounded about right. Which part are you doubting?”

“That you would hire me after I defaulted on a loan.”

I replied, “To the best of your knowledge you have the ability to repay. If those circumstances have changed without your knowledge, I’m not sure why I would be supposed to hold that against you.”

“You’re an odd one, Mr. Wilson.”

Nikki said, “You don’t know the half of it. He wouldn’t make you work for him if you didn’t want to, though.”

“That’s good to know.”

I said, “That would be slavery, and I don’t believe in it.”

Janet said, “That’s for sure. The Commonwealth prisons are full of people who would tell you that.”

Nelly asked, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, Dad has brought in a lot of money for the company, collecting bounties on slavers.”

She looked at me again. “You’re a bounty hunter?”

I replied, “That might be a little strong. We don’t go out looking for bounties, but if we happen to find someone with a price on them, in the course of our other business, we’re not above turning them in for a tidy profit. Besides, if they’re on the run, that usually means that whatever they’re flying is hot, and there will either be a reward for its return, or the insurance has already paid on it, and we can claim it as salvage. Either way, we get a saucer we can fix up and sell.”

She looked at Nikki. “He’s smarter than he looks, isn’t he?”

Nikki replied, “If he wasn’t, I’d have to tie his shoes for him.”

Nelly laughed. “I like you folks.”

I said, “I’d better see what I can do about a saucer for you.”

“Thanks.”

I got my comm back out, and called Max. “Morning, Bob. What can I do for you today?”

“I have a lady here looking for a ride back to the Commonwealth. Do we have any saucers ready to sell?”

“I have a few. Do you know what she might be wanting?”

“She mentioned something sporty.”

“That doesn’t thin it down much, Bob. All our saucers are sporty, by Commonwealth standards.”

“True. She seemed to think something a little luxurious would be nice. She’s been marooned on Earth for quite a while, and hasn’t been living up to the standards she’s used to, I don’t think.”

“I think I have just the thing. The fellow I’ve been selling most of our output to didn’t want it. He said his customers were just after performance, and the luxury would be something he couldn’t move.”

“Sounds like just the thing. Can you bring it over, so she can look it over?”

“Give me twenty minutes.”

“That’s plenty quick. See you then.”

“See you.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. I looked at Nelly, and said, “Max has something he thinks you will like. He should be here with it in a few minutes.”

“That’s wonderful! Thank you!”

“No problem. I’m wondering, though, do you have any possessions you need to go back after?”

“I can’t think of a thing I won’t be glad to see the last of. This planet is pretty, but I’ll be glad to be back in civilization.”

“Understandable.”

She chatted with the females while we waited for Max to show up. I went in the other room to talk to Gus and Becky. Gus was deep in thought, and I didn’t bother him. Becky asked, “What’s going on, Dad?”

“Oh, that lady who wandered in through the woods last night wants to go back to the Commonwealth. We’re trying to make a deal on a saucer for her.”

“I thought she had gotten marooned. Does she have money to pay for a saucer?”

“She says she has an account back in the Commonwealth that the people who marooned her wouldn’t have been able to access. She wants us to give her the saucer, and she’ll pay for it, when she gets back to the Commonwealth.”

“That sounds fishy, Dad.”

“It does, doesn’t it? Your Grandpa Bill seems to think she is an honest person, though. If it doesn’t work out, we can always send someone into the Commonwealth to retrieve the saucer.”

“That seems like a lot of fuss, for one saucer.”

“It is, but we can’t let the company get the reputation of being easy to do out of money. That would be more hassle than one retrieval.”

“I can see how that would be. Thanks for explaining that, Dad.”

“You’re welcome. What are you working on these days?”

She showed me the program she was writing. It was good code, and I told her so. It wasn’t long before Max landed in the front yard, and walked into the house. He asked, “Where’s this customer, Bob?”

“In the kitchen. Bill Rottum has already vouched for her as a credit risk, so you won’t have to worry about that.”

“I checked with Eve on the way over. I recognize the name. I have to agree with Bill. If she says she will pay, she will.”

“Good enough.”

Nelly walked into the room. She asked, “Are you fellows talking about me?”

“We were. I was just bringing Max here up to speed on your situation.”

“What would you say my situation is, Mr. Wilson?”

“You’ve found yourself in deep crap, and you need a little bit of help to fix that.”

“I’d say that’s fair. Can I see this saucer that you think I will like, then?”

Max said, “It’s right out front. If you want, we can have the band decorate the outside for you. They have a process that doesn’t burn off if you have to do a hot entry into an atmosphere.”

“I’ve never seen that done. It would stand out, wouldn’t it?”

“Yes, I suppose it would. I didn’t realize that would be a problem.”

“It wouldn’t, if I didn’t need to keep a low profile until I get things straightened out.”

“I see.”

They headed out to look at the saucer. I could see Max showing off all the features through the open door. Nelly seemed to like what she was seeing. Eventually, the door closed, the saucer faded, and I could tell they had left by the way the grass began to stand back up. I went back in the kitchen, and Nikki asked, “Do you think she likes it?”

“Your dad took her for a test flight, so she must not hate it too much.”

“He’s a pretty good salesman, when he puts his mind to it.”

“He mustn’t have really wanted to start the company, then. He wasn’t very convincing when I first met him.”

“He didn’t realize how sharp you and John would be, when it came to negotiating. You surprised him.”

“I guess.”

Janet said, “Nelly sounds like she wants to get in the air as soon as she can. I think she’s tired of not having access to Commonwealth tech.”

Nikki said, “I don’t quite understand why she’s in such a hurry, though. Earth isn’t that bad.”

I replied, “I think it would make a big difference whether you were here voluntarily or not.”

We talked for a half an hour or so, and then the saucer settled back onto the yard. Max and Nelly came into the house, and Max said, “She likes it.”

I asked, “Any details the band needs to work on, before she takes delivery?”

Nelly said, “It’s wonderful the way it is. Nicer than any saucer I’ve ever flown before.”

Max said, “I think she’s just impressed with how fast it is.”

Janet said, “It’s a pity we can’t hire her, and let her play with the really fast stuff.”

Nelly asked, “You have saucers faster than that?”

Nikki said, “Not saucers, but other types of ships, sure.”

“Other types?”

Nikki looked at me. “What are the fastest ships in the fleet, Admiral?”

“Couriers. Sally hasn’t approved that drive for anything larger, yet.”

Nelly looked at me. “Did she say Admiral?”

I replied, “We had more than one captain, and somebody had to be in charge. I didn’t duck fast enough.”

She shook her head. “I get the feeling I could stay here a long time, and still not know everything you people talk about.”

Milly said, “You could be right about that. We have a lot of stories.”

Max laid a contract on the table, and said, “I need you to sign here, Bob, and Nelly needs to sign here. That will obligate her to pay full price for the saucer within one year.”

I asked, “Earth year, or Commonwealth?”

“Earth. That’s where the contract was signed, so that’s the year that applies.”

I asked, “Did Max set you up to transfer into our account, so you don’t have to come all the way back out here to pay?”

“He did.”

I looked over the contract, and didn’t see anything I didn’t agree with. I signed it, and then Nelly did likewise. When that was done, Max said, “It was a pleasure doing business with you, Ma’am. Fly safe.”

“It was nice meeting all of you, too. I’d better get back, and see what I can do about getting even with Pondwater.”

I asked, “Did you say Pondwater?”

“Yes, I know how funny that name is in English.”

“That’s not it. Are we talking about Odiferous Pondwater?”

She looked surprised. “Yes, as a matter of fact. You know him?”

“Not exactly, but you’re going to have a little trouble getting revenge on him. He’s dead and gone.”

“How did that happen?”

“He killed himself, after we demolished his organization.”

“Really?”

Nikki said, “Really. How did you come to be associated with people like him in the first place?”

“I hired him right out of school. I always thought he wasn’t quite all he was cracked up to be, but you make him sound a lot worse than I remember.”

I said, “He was on the Commonwealth Council, when we were dealing with him. He was controlling a criminal organization on the side. Nasty piece of work.”

“That sounds much worse than he was when he worked for me.”

“There are reasons for that, but I’d rather not go into them with you, if you don’t mind.”

“Why is that, Admiral?”

“Because we’re holding secrets for the good of the Commonwealth, and you don’t have a need to know.”

She looked at Nikki. Nikki said, “I think that’s about all we can say on that subject. I’m sorry if that isn’t the answer you would like.”

“Don’t worry about it. I understand having to keep secrets. I just didn’t expect it, for some reason.”

I said, “Just because we act like hicks when we’re on leave, doesn’t mean we don’t understand how to run a fleet.”

“I’m thinking you manage to fool a lot of people that way, don’t you? Get them to underestimate you, and then show them their mistake?”

“I might have done something like that a time or two, now that you mention it.”

Max said, “I think your count might be a little low on that, Bob.”

Janet said, “You don’t have to tell all you know, Grandpa.”

I said, “It’s fine. Nelly here already has us figured out, and she’s trying to come up with a way to make a profit off of turning us loose on the Commonwealth.”

Nelly looked at me, and asked, “How did you know that?”

“You’re a successful businessperson. What else would you be thinking about?”

“I think I’d better get in the air, before the rest of my preconceived notions evaporate.”

Nikki said, “It might be wise. He’s dangerous around those.”

“I’m beginning to understand that.”

She headed out to her new saucer, and flew away. Max said, “I got a good price out of her, if we ever see the money.”

I asked, “How much?”

“Three hundred ounces.”

“That is a good price. Why so much?”

“She thought she owed us for the time in the autodoc, too.”

“I can understand that, but don’t you usually sell those for right around a hundred ounces?”

“The price has gone up. I’m getting a hundred and fifty, nowadays. That one was a little fancier, so I thought it was worth a little more.”

My comm beeped. It wasn’t a tone I was familiar with. I got it out and looked. “How about that? She must have gotten in touch with her bank on the saucer comm. She just put the three hundred ounces in the company account, with a fifty ounce tip to boot.”

Max said, “That was quick. I wonder why she didn’t go ahead and take care of it while she was here?”

“I don’t know. Maybe she thought the primitives would keep her captive and take all her dough, if they knew she could access the account from here.”

Max replied, “Given the kind of luck she’s had before, that sounds like a precaution she would take.”

Nikki asked, “Do you think we left her with a good impression?”

I said, “I don’t know what we would have done better, do you?”

“No, I can’t think of anything.”

John said, “She seemed to be happy with everything we did.”

I replied, “That’s what I thought. I’m sure we’ll hear from her if there’s something she doesn’t like.”

Nikki said, “I don’t have any doubt about that. I heard about her when I was in the Academy. She was a force of nature, before she came up missing.”

John said, “I don’t think she’s lost much, while she was here.”

Max said, “No, it wouldn’t seem that way. She had a lot of questions when we were flying.”

Janet asked, “What kind of questions, Grandpa?”

“How we had gotten the saucer to fly so well, what the limitations of the different systems were, that sort of thing.”

I asked, “Did she seem happy with what it could do?”

“She was trying very hard to keep from seeming pleased with it, but with the cold reading, I was able to tell she was very happy about it.”

“Good deal. How hard did she try to talk you out of the company confidential stuff?”

“She didn’t. I was expecting it, too, but she never even asked about it.”

Nikki said, “You must have scared her, Caveman.”

“I guess. I didn’t think I made that big a deal about it. I never even mentioned that we had tech we weren’t sharing.”

John said, “I didn’t think so either. She must have figured out you weren’t joking, some way or another.”

Max said, “I don’t know, but she seemed to take you at your word.”

Milly said, “He didn’t even slip into Admiral voice, when he told her it was confidential.”

Nunya said, “No, but he did sound serious.”

“I guess.”

George faded in. He said, “Boss, I must have been watching her more closely than the rest of you. She didn’t believe you when you said that Pondwater was dead.”

I replied, “I wonder why she chose that to disbelieve, out of everything we told her.”

“I couldn’t tell you that, Boss.”

John said, “That does seem like an odd thing to decide to doubt us on.”

George asked, “Would you like me to see if anyone in the fleet has any records that might shed some light on the situation, Boss?”

“You might as well.”

I got out my comm, and sent a text to Nellie. “If you find any evidence that Pondwater isn’t as dead as we think he is, could you please send us an update?”

It wasn’t long before I got a reply. “Of course, Admiral. How did you figure out that I didn’t believe you?”

“I have good security.”

I put the comm away.

George faded out. John asked, “What are you planning to do today, Bob?”

“I know what I would like to do, but I doubt George and Ringo would think it was a good idea.”

“What’s that?”

“Take a run into Springfield, and see if I could track down this lady who is hiring the people who are protesting the company.”

“What do you hope to find out?”

“I’d like to get some idea of who is funding the operation, and what they are hoping to accomplish.”

“Do you really think that this woman will be a big enough fish in their pond to know enough to make it worth the time?”

“I couldn’t tell you that until we have a chat with her, now could I?”

George faded back in. He said, “We can protect you, if you feel it’s necessary, Boss. You’re right, we’d rather you stayed in the Holler, but we know that’s a lot to ask.”

John said, “Let’s take my Jeep. They will know your GMC, if they’ve done their homework at all.”

“Sounds about right.” I kissed Nikki, and said, “I’ll be home for supper.”

“Be careful, even if George thinks they can handle it. I don’t want to see you in an autodoc.”

“I don’t want to be in one, either.”

We went out, and Snitz wanted to go with us. I bent down, and asked, “Why do you want to go on this one, Little Buddy?”

He tapped out, “Extra eyes.”

“Okay, then. Watch yourself.”

We went to the Wagoneer, and got aboard. John asked, “He thought we needed adult supervision?”

“Something like that.”

My comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Hey, Boss. Is there a reason you fellas want to drive all the way into Springfield?”

“No, I don’t suppose there is. What do you have in mind, Marine?”

“We could fly you from the Holler to someplace close to town, and that would save you some time. We’re going to have to tail you, anyway.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“On it, Boss.”

I put the comm away, and said, “John, the Marines want to pick us up and haul us to town.”

“Understood.”

The freighter landed in the road in front of us, and John eased the Wagoneer aboard. We didn’t bother getting out, no farther than we were going. A voice came over the intercom, and said, “Prepare to disembark.”

John hadn’t shut the truck off, so he dropped it in reverse, and looked over his shoulder. When the ramp came down, he backed off the freighter, and we went on about our merry way. My comm chimed, and I found a route to the last place the lady we wanted to talk to had been seen. It directed us to a cafe. Not the kind we usually frequented, more of a hipster joint. I rolled my window down, in case Snitz needed to get out, and we went in. The waitress didn’t actually ask us if we were lost, but the question was implied in her attitude. She asked, “Table or booth?”

I found the lady I had seen on the video, and said, “We’re meeting someone, thanks.”

We walked over and sat at the table our target had taken possession of. She looked at us over her laptop and asked, “Can I help you two?”

I replied, “I’m sure you could, but I doubt you’re willing.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I’d really like to know who you’re working for. I doubt that’s information you’re willing to part with.”

“I’m not working for anyone. I’m a freelance writer.”

John asked, “That pays well enough to afford to hire a rent-a-mob?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I fiddled with my watch, and got it to play back the video of her paying the members of the rent-a-mob from the day before. “Ring any bells?”

“I admit, that looks like me, but it isn’t.”

John said, “Before you try that again, I feel obligated to tell you that both of us are accomplished cold readers, and you’re going to have to do better than that to fool us.”

I said, “Oh, John. Now you’ve gone and spoiled her fun. She thought she got that one over on us.”

“I figured we needed to finish up before the cops got here. I saw the waitress call them.”

“Maybe we’ll get lucky, and it will be Wobbles.”

“I doubt that. There are a lot of police in this town. The odds aren’t good.”

“You’re right about that.” I turned back to our ‘writer’. “So, why is it you think we’re so bad, anyway?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re paying people to protest against us. Why is that?”

“Why do you think?”

“I think you’re getting paid by someone else to organize the whole thing, and you don’t have any idea what it’s all about.”

“I still think you have me confused with someone else.”

John held up a finger, and waved it back and forth. He said, “Remember what I said about the cold reading? That wasn’t even close to the truth.”

“Okay then. I am the one who organized the protest. What of it?”

I said, “It takes a bunch of money to bus those folks in, and put them up in hotels. Do you expect us to believe you make that kind of money as a freelance writer?”

“I don’t really care what you believe, to tell you the truth. People like you need to be stopped.”

“I can think of several reasons you might say that, but do you mind telling us just what your reason is?”

“You think you can leave all the problems of the Earth behind, and go find another planet to spoil. The human race can’t be allowed to do to other worlds what it has done to the Earth.”

I replied, “I’ve been accused of a lot of things, but I think that’s a first.”

John said, “We haven’t spoiled any planets, have we, Bob?”

“Not that I recall. We moved a few people around, when they found themselves on planets that didn’t suit their needs, but other than that, well, there is Zarathrustra. I have to think our new friend here wouldn’t approve of what we did there.”

She looked at me. “What did you do?”

“Bombarded the place for several days straight, to get rid of all the tectonic stress, so that we didn’t cause an earthquake every time we landed a ship.”

“Why do that?”

“It’s a pretty place. We’re hoping to retire there, someday.”

“You just changed the planet to suit your notions of what a planet should be like?”

“You could look at it that way, I suppose. We did move in a moon, so that the stresses wouldn’t build up again.”

“You don’t really expect me to believe that, do you?”

“No, I can’t say I expect you to believe anything I say. You seem to have already made up your mind, and I don’t think we’re going to be able to change it. I’m sorry, could you tell me who you work for again? It slipped my mind.”

“That’s because I never told you in the first place. I’d like you two to leave now.”

“As you wish.” I stood, and John followed suit. I said, “At least let us buy your coffee.” I threw a couple of Bobs on the table, and turned to go. There was a policeman speaking with the girl at the counter. I walked over to see what kind of trouble we were in. I said, “Morning, Officer.”

“Good morning, Sir. I received a complaint about you and your friend.”

“That’s what I thought. We were already leaving, is there something else you need us to do?”

“I need to know why you were here, for my report.”

“We came into town to speak with the lady over there about some protests.”

“Protests?”

“She’s been funding protests against our company. We wanted to see if there was some way to repair whatever grievance she has, and smooth things over. She didn’t even want to admit to being the person in question, so we didn’t get very far with that.”

“You came here to try and settle a grievance?”

“We did. We’ve failed, so I suppose the next stop will have to be our lawyer.”

“May I ask why you think that lady is the one causing the protests?”

“Of course, Officer. I’m going to show you a video, if that’s alright.”

“That would be fine.”

I brought the video up on my watch again, and it projected the image above my wrist. The Officer looked back and forth between the video and the lady at the table several times. He said, “I can see why you thought she was the lady in question. Do you have any other evidence?”

I replied, “This is the part where it gets hard to believe, I think. I’m Bob Wilson, Earthbound on shore leave. The crew of my flagship has been watching her, ever since they got that video. She’s the same person, whether she admits it, or not.”

The Officer looked at me, and said, “I thought you looked familiar. You introduce that robot band on YouTube, don’t you?”

“I do.”

“They play good music.”

“I’ll tell them you said so.”

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to see some ID, to back up who you say you are, though.”

“No problem. I think I even have my old Missouri Driver’s License, if that helps.”

“That would be great.”

I gently pulled out my billfold, and brought out my BSR ID, and the license that I had told him I still had. He said, “This license is going to expire soon.”

I said, “I don’t use it much anymore. I’ll have to ask my lawyer whether my BSR license is good enough, or if I have to renew that one.”

“You have another license?”

I handed him my BSR Driver’s License. He read, “The bearer is permitted to drive on any planet where BSR has a presence.” He asked, “What does that mean?”

John said, “Well, we do drive on other planets besides Earth.”

The waitress asked, “You pollute the air on other planets?”

John replied, “No, most of our vehicles are electric. I only remember one planet where we were obliged to use diesel.”

The Officer said, “That’s not what we’re here about. Did you assault the lady over there?”

I replied, “Neither of us laid a hand on her, Officer. My dog couldn’t have done anything, because he’s waiting in the truck. We even paid her for her time.”

“I see. I think I may have been called out under false pretenses. Do you mind staying here until I can run your ID?”

“Not a problem, Officer. Would you like to run John’s, as well?”

“I don’t think that will be necessary. I’m nearly positive who you are, anyway.”

We stood quietly as he ran my ID. A customer came to pay, and I held up a finger, and threw a couple of Bob’s on the counter. The cashier asked, “What are these?”

“Silver coins. Worth more than their bill. Keep the change.”

“I’m sorry, we only accept American money.”

I got out a fifty from my billfold, and handed it to her. “Will that do?”

“Yes.”

I left the Bobs on the counter. The customer said, “Thanks, Mister.”

“No problem. Sorry for the disturbance.”

He left, and the Officer finished with my ID. He handed it back, and said, “You check out, Mr. Wilson. By the way, Wobbles says ‘hi’.”

“Tell him it’s good to hear from him.”

“I will.”

“Are we free to go?”

“I don’t need anything else.”

The cashier asked, “Aren’t you going to arrest him?”

The Officer replied, “I couldn’t if I wanted to. He has diplomatic immunity.”

We went back to the Wagoneer. Snitz was hanging his head out the window, catching all the smells. I gave him a scratch, and he backed up so that I could get in.

Once we were safely on the road again, John said, “Well, we didn’t learn much from that.”

“Don’t be so hasty. I’m sure she’s on the phone to her supervisor, even as we speak. Sue will find out something from that, I’m sure.”

“How do you know for sure that Sue is working on it? Did you order it before we got there?”

“You were with me the whole time. Did you see me order it?”

“No, I didn’t. That’s why I wonder if you know what you’re talking about.”

“Before Sue worked for Topper, she worked for me. I know her fairly well, not to mention how well I know Saucy. If she didn’t come up with the idea, I’m sure Saucy asked her to keep an eye on that lady’s phone.”

My comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Boss, it’s Sue.”

“Hi, Sue. I’ve been expecting your call. What did you find out?”

“I traced the call the lady made, as soon as you two left the cafe. Luckily, the person she called didn’t use a burner, so I was able to crack into their call records, and get some useful data. It appears that she’s working for an elite group of big money people. Quasi-governmental types.”

“Oh boy. What have we done to whiz them off?”

“I was able to pick up enough from the calls that I was able to trace that I think I have an answer to that, Boss. The scary part is that the folks that the Chinese Ambassador brought with him were paid for by the same people. They seem to think that humanity needs to stay on Earth. They think that you are evil, for getting people off the planet.”

“Okay, I understand what you’re saying, but why exactly would they think that?”

“I’m not positive about that part, Boss. Something to the effect that they are the only ones qualified to lead the human species, and it needs to stay on Earth so that they can control it.”

“I’ve heard about folks like that, but I thought it was all conspiracy theories. You mean to tell me they’re for real?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“I’m going to have to think this one through, Sue. I’m not sure what we might want to do about it. Thanks for the update.”

“You’re welcome, Boss.”

I put away the comm. John asked, “What’s up, Bob?”

“You know all that crap on the internet about the billionaires plotting against the common man?”

“I’ve seen it go so far as to accuse them of devil worship, and all kinds of nonsense. Why do you ask?”

“Well, it seems the lady we spoke with in the cafe is getting paid by something that looks a lot like one of those outfits.”

“You’re kidding!”

“I wish. I don’t have the first glimmering of an idea about how to deal with something like that.”

“Why are they after us, anyway?”

“Apparently, they want humanity to stay on Earth, so that they can keep us all under their thumbs. Anyway, that was what Sue was able to figure out from what she had found so far.”

“I can’t say that was on my to-do list this morning.”

“I can’t, either. Sue is still looking, maybe she can find something that will make it make more sense.”

“I hope so. Right now, it sounds bad.”

“That it does. I never thought I would be nostalgic for the good old days when it was just a Squirrel agent behind every rock.”

John replied, “At least we could distinguish those fellas on the sensors, once we figured out how. I don’t see any way to find these folks, without a lot of digging into records.”

“That’s the way it looks to me, too. I guess I need to get some resources on the problem. Any suggestions?”

“I’m still not sure how we go about finding these folks, other than what Sue is doing.”

“That’s all we have, at the moment. We can’t just start picking these folks up and dropping them off in unhandy places. With the amount of money and influence they have, we couldn’t find a place remote enough to bother them, without taking them off planet. Even if we did that, their friends that we didn’t catch would make doing anything on Earth difficult for us. I don’t see a way to finesse this one, John.”

“What if we leave them in place? Isn’t there something else we could do to punish them? At least inconvenience them?”

“Well, they do seem to thrive on anonymity. I suppose we could expose them and their plots. The company has built up a lot of good will, since we’ve been doing rescues and running the clinic ships. I think we might be able to trade on some of that.”

“Do you suppose we could get Topper to do some PSA’s about what they’re up to?”

“That might be the way to go about it. I guess I have gotten used to letting the Marines handle all our problems. That just isn’t going to work this time, is it?”

“We could do it that way, but I’m afraid they would have to use deadly force to accomplish much, and that would tear up all the good will that we’ve established since you went to Tantrum.”

“I never thought it would be so hard to live and let live, when we started all this.”

“I never did either. We thought back then that it would be a small, local operation, and the worst we would have to worry about would be getting caught with alien tech. Things surely have changed since then, haven’t they?”

“You’d still join up, even if you knew then what you know now, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, Bob. Every day, and twice on Sunday.”

We pulled into the parking lot where Mr. Watley had his office. John said, “This doesn’t look promising.”

There were several people milling around in front of the building. I replied, “No, it doesn’t. I wonder how they found his office so quickly?”

“Couldn’t tell you that, but I don’t think leaving Snitz in the truck is a good idea this time, do you?”

“No, I do not.”

We got out, and locked the truck. The three of us started toward the building. When they saw who we were, the protesters got organized, and blocked our way into the building. George whispered in my ear, “Boss, some of these folks are armed. We’d rather you didn’t confront them.”

I said, “What do you propose, then?”

“We have enough Marines to lift you and Captain Branham onto the roof. You should be able to access the office from there, without too much trouble.”

“Don’t forget Snitz. I don’t want him having to deal with this mob.”

“We wouldn’t do that, Boss.”

The next thing I knew, I felt a hand in each armpit, lifting me to the roof of the building. When we got there, Crystal was holding the door into the building. She said, “Right this way, gentlemen. Sorry about the mess out front.”

I replied, “No problem. You have no control over them, anyway. Thanks for letting us in.”

We followed Crystal back to the office, and went inside. Mr. Watley was standing in the reception area, waiting. He asked, “What can I do for you fellows today?”

John said, “Well, we’re wondering what we can do about those people out front, for starters.”

“I doubt there is much that will accomplish anything, legally. I could get restraining orders against those particular individuals, but I don’t doubt the people behind it would be able to recruit others fairly quickly. Even if I was able to convince a judge to issue a restraining order against their organization, they would be able to file paperwork and incorporate under a new name in short order. The folks behind these people know how to use the courts to their advantage, fellas. They have more lawyers, and the people they have are born with connections that I just don’t have. I don’t think I’m going to be able to help you much with this one.”

I said, “I’m not surprised, but I was hoping you would have something we could use to help with this bunch.”

“Sorry to disappoint, Mr. Wilson. If you want me to try, I will, but I think it would be a waste of time, for me, and for you. Your time would be better spent finding some other way to get them to back off.”

John said, “We were just working on that, in the car. Would you be willing to listen to what we have, and tell us where we’re mistaken?”

“I would be more than happy to do that. I feel bad about not being able to help, after how well you fellows have treated me. I just wish my wife felt the same.”

John asked, “Your wife isn’t as impressed?”

“She doesn’t seem to be, no. I’m not quite sure why that is.”

I replied, “You never can tell.”

Crystal said, “It has something to do with a lady who moved here not that long ago. I think she has something to do with the folks who are protesting.”

Mr. Watley asked, “How do you know that, Crystal?”

“I happened to be in the same coffee shop as Mrs. Watley and a few of her friends last week. I couldn’t help overhearing.”

George faded in. He asked, “Ma’am, if it isn’t too much trouble, could you look at some pictures for me?”

“It’s no trouble. You hide very well.”

“All part of my job. I’m supposed to be easy to overlook, until the Boss needs me.”

“You’re his bodyguard?”

“When he needs one. It’s easier to talk him out of doing dangerous things, before he needs a bodyguard. As long as we bring him home without any extra holes, we did our job.”

“I see. The way Julie used to talk, that must be more challenging than you let on.”

“Some days.”

He showed her some images of the lady we talked to in the coffee shop. She said, “Yes, that’s the lady I was talking about who seemed to be influencing the way those ladies thought about things.”

Mr. Watley spoke up. “Okay, George, who is that?”

I said, “I can handle this one, George.”

“Thanks, Boss.” He faded out.

I said, “Well, she was the one who was paying the rent-a-mob to protest the other day. I don’t doubt she hired the folks downstairs as well. We were wondering how they figured out who our lawyer was this quickly, but if your wife has been talking with them, that would explain it.”

Mr. Watley said, “I’ve tried to impress on her the importance of keeping things private, but she doesn’t seem to get it.”

“No more competent than this bunch seems, I don’t think it’s really anything to worry about.”

“Still, I should be able to protect your secrets better than this.”

John said, “I think you’ve done fine. This one slip up isn’t going to make us take our business elsewhere.”

“That’s a relief.”

I said, “We’re happy with your work. You don’t think there’s anything in the way of a legal remedy to these protests?”

“I’ve looked at everything I can think of, and I haven’t found anything we could sue them for.”

John asked, “What they’re doing doesn’t rise to the level of defamation?”

“You guys are public figures, so it takes a lot more for grounds to sue.”

I replied, “I knew being on those YouTube videos was a bad idea.”

Mr. Watley replied, “That does make you more of a public figure, but even without those, I don’t think we would be able to claim you were a private citizen.”

John asked, “So, we’re stuck with dealing with these folks?”

“Unless you have some way to deal with them while they aren’t in public view. Otherwise, you’re going to open yourselves up to charges.”

I replied, “I don’t like the sound of that. The people behind all this have some of the best lawyers in the world.”

“I knew they would be good, but why do you say that?”

“I’d rather not say. You would want to fit me for a tinfoil hat.”

John said, “I don’t want to believe it either, but what we’ve seen and heard so far points that way.”

Jimmy Watley asked, “What way is that?”

I replied, “It looks like we’ve come up against the global elites, this time.”

“Do you really think they’re organized enough to pull off something like this?”

“I didn’t, until the evidence began to pile up.”

“You mean you’ve been convinced?”

“Convinced might be a little strong at this point, but certainly willing to entertain the possibility.”

John said, “We don’t have evidence yet that more than one person is behind all of it, but if so, they have gone to the trouble of convincing some of their employees that there are more folks involved. I’m not sure what utility that would have.”

Mr. Watley replied, “It could be a precaution in case things come apart. Whoever is actually behind it might be able to obscure their actual involvement behind some kind of conspiracy, in the hopes of not being held accountable for everything they have done.”

John asked, “Do you think that would work?”

“If they were only worried about Earth authorities, I would think it would have a decent chance of keeping them out of jail. Against you fellows, I don’t think they have any hope. I’ve seen some of the things you can do.”

I asked, “You’re saying that there isn’t much you can do to help us?”

“I can’t think of anything.” Crystal said, “Sorry to interrupt, but you gentlemen might want to look out the window. There’s a problem in the parking lot.”

We walked over to the window, and saw a squad of Marines keeping the crowd away from the Wagoneer. I asked, “George, it doesn’t look like we’re going to be able to drive out of here, does it?”

He faded in, “No, Boss. The Evans is on the way to pick up the truck, and the five of us.”

John asked, “Are you going to be able to clear enough parking lot to get the Jeep aboard?”

“Don’t worry about that, Captain. Scotti built a new rig for retrieving cars, after the Marines had so much fun getting the Admiral’s new toy out of the woods.”

“This I have to see.”

Crystal said, “Here they come.”

The Evans came into view, with a fighter escort. Nunya waved at us from the pilot’s seat. We waved back. Soon enough, Janet came down on the hoist, riding a strange looking rig. Once it was over John’s Wagoneer, the function of all of its legs became clearer. Four of them put pads under the truck, like a regular two-post lift in a shop. Then the other four extended pads on top of the tires, to keep the truck from sliding around as it was lifted. Janet seemed to have to control the placement of each pad. Once she was satisfied, the whole rig began to lift, and was taken aboard the Evans. John said, “That was quite a show, but I think that means it’s time for us to leave.” We shook hands with Mr. Watley, and headed back up to the roof. The ramp of the Evans was touching the roof, and we all went aboard.

Janet said, “Well, thanks for giving us something fun to do, Dad.”

“You’re welcome. Any time.”

“Are you two about ready for lunch?”

I thought about it, and asked, “I could eat. What about you, John?”

“That sounds like a good idea. Do we want to go to Julie’s, and see if we can draw some more of these folks out?”

“I think I’ve had enough of their crap for one day. I’d rather just go home.”

“I’m glad you said that. I don’t think Jane would approve of us being bait for those protesters.”

“There has to be a better way to go about figuring out what we need to do with them.”

John replied, “That may be, but I’m not seeing it right off the bat. Money isn’t going to get their attention, and they already have all the power they can use.”

“We could certainly give them vacations somewhere, and inconvenience them to a certain extent, but I doubt that would do much to get their attention, either.”

Janet asked, “Do you have to solve it this morning?”

I replied, “I don’t suppose we do. I was hoping one of you girls would have some insight on a way to deal with these folks that we hadn’t thought of.”

“I don’t. The only thing I can tell you is putting yourselves out as bait won’t get the results you want. If these people are used to making things happen from behind the scenes, they’re not going to expose themselves, just because you offer them an easy target. They’re going to hire someone to come after you.”

John said, “That’s true, but every time they hire someone, money changes hands. If we can make enough of a pattern out of that, we can figure out where the money is coming from, and deal with them directly.”

Nunya said, “That sounds good, but they only have to get lucky once, Captain. We have to be perfect every time. That makes it a tough proposition.”

I said, “The bots have stood in for me before. It’s been a while, so I’m sure their camo is even better than it was then. We could send out bots for them to target.”

John asked, “To what end, though?”

“Well, it would give us more transactions to track, wouldn’t it?”

“It would, until they figured out what we were up to. They might quit trying, at that point.”

“Wouldn’t that be what we wanted in the first place? The ability to move around without every trip to town being a military operation?”

“Somehow, I don’t think they would let it work out as nicely as you make it sound, Bob.”

“You’re probably right about that. I guess we’re going to have to have a meeting, and see what we can come up with, aren’t we?”

“I hate to say it, what with us trying to take some leave and all, but I think you’re right.”

“I’ll set something up for this afternoon. Maybe we can do it over the comm.”

“That would be good, but I don’t know if it will work.”

“Eve has a pretty nice display up forward that I can use to run the thing.”

“That might work.”

Janet said, “We’re here, Uncle John. Time to unload.”

He looked out the ramp, and saw that we were at his place. He said, “Thanks, Janet.”

“Don’t thank me, thank Nunya. She’s the one doing the flying today.”

He hit the intercom button, and said, “Thanks, Nunya.”

“All part of the service. Thanks for flying Ornery Air.”

He shook his head, and climbed into his Jeep.

John backed out, and Janet ran up the ramp. It wasn’t long before the ramp came down again. We walked off the ship, and headed for the house. Nikki was standing on the porch, trying her best to look stern. “Did you get in trouble again, Caveman?”

“We did our best to stay out of trouble, Space Cadet.”

“You two, stay out of trouble? Tell me another funny one.”

“Dee got a job driving a hearse?”

“You’ll have to do better than that.”

“Guess I’m out of luck, then.”

I climbed the steps and kissed her. She asked, “How bad was it?”

“Not that bad. They were trying to make things inconvenient for us, but we managed to keep them at bay. We’re just not sure what our next step needs to be, though.”

“Are we going to have to get serious for a bit?”

“I’m afraid we are. We’ve never actually faced a problem exactly like this before, so we’re going to have to take a little time to figure out a solution.”

“That sounds an awful lot like work.”

“It does, doesn’t it? I don’t think it’s anything that can’t wait until after lunch, do you?”

“No. It doesn’t sound like fun, though.”

“All told, I’d rather be cobbling up coolant pipes for decrepit saucers, but this is what our shepherd has brought us today.”

“You never can tell what kind of trouble you might get into, patching up saucers.”

“The good kind.” I kissed her again.

“I’m glad you still think so.”

We went in, and Ryder had a wonderful lunch ready to go.

While I was helping with the dishes, I asked, “Ryder, do you have any ideas for dealing with Earth organizations that are giving us trouble?”

“I take it giving Tex a workout is off the table?”

“I’m afraid so. It would be more fun that way, though.”

“How do these people who want to take a run at us get their power?”

“Money, mostly.”

“Doesn’t that sound like Mrs. Wilson’s department, Boss?”

“You mean, hack into their banks, and wipe out their balances?”

“That was what I had in mind, yes.”

“That’s great, for their cash on hand. I’m pretty sure that will be a small fraction of their total wealth, though. We would have to be able to access more of their holdings than that to even get their attention.”

George faded in and asked, “Boss, you sounded like you were going to call a meeting of the captains to work on this. Did you change your mind?”

“No. Just thinking out loud. We’ll head out to the Evans and get the screen fired up as soon as we’re finished with the dishes.”

“Okay. I just wondered if I should send out a message that the meeting was called off.”

“No, I don’t think so. I want all the mental horsepower on this one that I can scrounge up.”

“Understood.” He faded back out.

We finished the dishes. I started toward the door. Nikki asked, “Do you mind if I tag along, Caveman?”

“I wish you would. We’re probably going to need some advice about hacking, before this is all done. Ryder, would you mind coming as well?”

“I’d love to, Boss.”

The three of us started that way, and Snitz followed us. I said, “You think you have opinions that need to be heard, Little Buddy?”

He nodded.

We got to the Evans, and Eve had set up the galley for the meeting. She asked, “Did you need anyone besides the Captains, Boss?”

“Might be a good idea to loop in Lakki, while you’re into it. It’s beginning to sound like there may be some high-powered hacking involved, before we’re through.”

“Would you like Taz looped in, as well?”

“That would be best. Thanks.”

“All part of the service, Boss.”

Eve must have had everyone waiting for us to arrive, because it didn’t take long at all for the screen to be populated with all the people who needed to be at the meeting. Dingus asked, “Are we headed out, Boss?”

I replied, “No. Something has come up here that we need to deal with. I’m hoping some of you have good ideas. Nikki and Ryder have something that may work, but I’m not sure it’s the best way to get our point across.”

John asked, “Do you want me to tell everyone what we’re up against, Bob?”

“That might be best. I don’t seem to have any patience for this bunch.”

Dingus asked, “What happened?”

John said, “It seems that the ‘global elite’ have decided that humanity needs to stay Earthbound, and we’re a danger to their plans.”

Dingus asked, “Why would they think that?”

John replied, “As near as we can tell, they think that they are the only ones who know what’s best for humanity, and if we let humans off Earth, they won’t be able to control them the way they think they ought to.”

Diego said, “You mean there really are people like that? I thought that was all tinfoil hat stuff.”

I said, “If it isn’t real, someone is going to quite a bit of trouble to convince us that it is.”

“Fair enough. We proceed as if the information we have is legitimate, until we find out otherwise, right?”

I replied, “That’s the only course of action I see at this point. If you have a better idea, please, lay it on us.”

Diego replied, “I don’t have anything, Boss. I’m not even sure what the problem is, yet.”

“It seems that the Chinese Ambassador, and the people with him were affiliated with the people who are backing the protests we are seeing against BSR.”

“It’s all part of one scheme?”

I said, “So it would seem. We’ve yet to catch anyone high enough up in their organization to find out much.”

Diego asked, “You’re saying the Chinese Ambassador was just a flunky for this bunch?”

“That’s the way it seems. I’m beginning to think I should have spent more time with him, to see if I could crack him.”

John said, “I was there, and I don’t think the work it would have taken would have been worth it. He had a high opinion of himself, but I can’t imagine they would have sent anyone with any real knowledge of their organization on such a risky mission.”

Steve asked, “Was it risky, from their point of view? They seem to be of the same opinion everyone has, until they get to know BSR. We just lucked into some tech, and don’t know what to do with it.”

Dingus said, “That did seem to be their attitude. I still don’t think whoever is running this outfit would be willing to risk their secrets with someone who is going up against an organization they don’t understand.”

Topper said, “I’ve looked at the footage of the interrogation, and I have to say I agree with John. Working on him longer would have been a waste of time. We’ve gotten more out of his cellphone records than we would have ever gotten out of him.”

I replied, “I’m surprised. I would think that an organization that puts so much stock in secrecy would be more careful about communications.”

“You would think so. I would have expected them to do all their important business with couriers. So far, we haven’t found evidence to support that, though. It seems they think they are obscure enough that they can get away with using insecure comms.”

John asked, “Are we going to be able to use that against them?”

Topper replied, “That all depends on what lengths we’re willing to go to, in order to put them out of business. They manage to stay just inside the line of legality, for the most part. They really don’t have much of anything in the way of outstanding charges we could use against them. I’m not seeing any way to punish them, without setting up our own prison.”

I asked, “Are you saying we don’t have any effective method of putting a stop to what they are doing?”

“I’m not sure about that, Boss. The legal framework of Earth doesn’t offer us a solution, at the very least.”

“So, you’re saying that any effective remedy is going to be outside the law?”

“I’m afraid so, Boss.”

“Are enough of their assets in places that our hackers could get at them to even inconvenience them?”

Nikki said, “I’ve been working with Lakki, and we think we can access their brokerage accounts, as well as their bank accounts. That should give us most of their capital. They will still have their real assets, houses and cars, things like that.”

I replied, “I’m sure they all have reserves of cash, and gold, in case of trouble.”

Nikki said, “There’s no way we can do anything about that, from cyberspace.”

Topper said, “I doubt we would be able to raid that many compounds simultaneously.”

I said, “I do too.”

Dingus asked, “What does that leave us?”

I replied, “I don’t know, Dingus. I was hoping one of you could give me a push in the right direction.”

Steve said, “These folks like to keep a low profile, don’t they?”

I said, “I think it almost counts as a religion with them.”

“With the tech we have, I’m sure we could come up with compromising pictures of them, at least most of them. From what I’ve heard over the years, folks at that level have some weird kinks. If we were to expose them, that would diminish their power quite a bit, wouldn’t it?”

“I can’t imagine it would help anything, from their point of view.”

Lakki spoke up. “Wouldn’t any proof of that kind of thing be air-gapped, at the very least?”

I said, “You never can tell with these folks. They tend to be arrogant, so they might actually believe their computer security is good enough.”

“Famous last words, I believe they say on Earth.”

John said, “That’s the saying, all right. Do you think you can make it reality?”

“What have I done to you, Captain? Why do you feel the need to insult me?”

“My mistake. I forgot who I was talking to, for a moment.”

We laughed. I asked, “Do you think we can empty their accounts, and release the embarrassing evidence, all at once?”

Nikki said, “It will be a little trickier, but I think we can write a few scripts, and get it all synchronized. You think it will have more impact that way?”

“I do.”

She continued, “It will take a day or two to set all this up.”

I replied, “I don’t think we’re in any hurry. They don’t seem to be too eager to take us on.”

Dingus said, “That could just mean that they have figured out a way to attack us that we haven’t noticed yet.”

“I knew there was a reason I kept you around, Dingus. Do you have any idea what they might be up to?”

“Given the way you describe them, I would think that their preferred weapons would be lawsuits. Have Jimmy or Henry seen anything in that line?”

John said, “We just talked with Jimmy this morning, and he didn’t mention anything. Has anyone spoken to Henry since we got in?”

I replied, “Not about work, anyway. I have to think he would have mentioned it, if he thought there was a possibility of a problem.”

Topper said, “We tweaked a couple of things on his fast car for him. He seemed to think that things were running smoothly.”

I said, “Well, that either means they haven’t gotten around to doing anything yet, or they are so sneaky that Henry didn’t pick up on it.”

Eve asked, “Would you like me to loop him into this conversation, Boss?”

“Might as well. It could be that he knows about something that he just didn’t think was worth bothering us with.”

Henry showed up on my screen. He said, “Good afternoon, everyone. What can I help with?”

John said, “We’ve come onto a situation we haven’t had to deal with before, and we’d like to know if you’ve seen any indications of trouble.”

“What kind of trouble, exactly?”

I said, “Lawfare.”

“I haven’t seen any filings that would come under that heading, Bob. Who do you think is coming after the company?”

“This is the part where you’re going to need your tinfoil hat, Henry. We think we’ve actually gotten the attention of those global elites the conspiracy theorists are always blathering on about.”

“Big money types, who are allergic to publicity?”

“Those are the folks, yessir.”

“What do they think you’re doing wrong?”

“What we’ve heard so far leads us to believe they think that humans belong on Earth, where they can control them, since they are more qualified to know what is best for the human species.”

“I hope they have a way of putting it that sounds better than that.”

“I’m sure they do, but I haven’t heard it yet. I’m sure their version says something about how they are doing it all out of the goodness of their hearts, for the benefit of all mankind, or something to that effect.”

Henry replied, “That sounds about right. How do you propose to battle these people?”

“Well, as you can see, I have the hackers in the meeting. Are you sure you want to know what they have planned?”

“You, and by extension they, have diplomatic immunity, and even if they didn’t, there’s no way Earth authorities could lay hands on them. I don’t see any reason why I shouldn’t know what’s about to happen.”

“Well, then, they seem to think that they can relieve these folks of all of their assets that can be reached by computer, such as bank and brokerage accounts. That still leaves them with a chunk of other property, I have no doubt. They also think that it might be possible to find evidence of some of their recreational activities, and make that public.”

“That sounds like about as good an attack as you’re going to be able to devise, unless you’re willing to send in the Marines to get them.”

“Since they don’t have outstanding warrants, I don’t see any way to justify that.”

“No, they wouldn’t have charges against them. They leave that sort of work for their hired hands.”

John asked, “You sound like the voice of experience, Henry. Have you had dealings with these folks before?”

“You remember I used to work in maritime law, don’t you? The kind of people we’re talking about like their yachts. I handled a few cases that had to do with them.”

John replied, “Could you give us any insight into how to deal with them?”

“Not really. I was one of the hired hands, not looked on as an equal, so I didn’t learn much about how they think. It was more, ‘Here’s the job, make sure it gets done well and quickly’.”

“I see. You don’t see anything we’re missing, then?”

“I can’t think of anything. I might be able to come up with something, if I spoke with some of my old colleagues.”

I said, “Can you do that without letting our adversaries know that we’re coming after them?”

“I’m nearly positive, Bob.”

“Go for it, then. Let us know if you find out anything.”

“Will do. Do you need me for anything else right now?”

“I don’t think so. Eve will let you back into the meeting, if you learn anything we need to know.”

“Good enough.”

He vanished from the screen. Taz said, “It sounds like we’re going to be busy, finding and compromising computer systems.”

Nikki replied, “It sure does.”

Dingus asked, “Is there anything else you need us captains for, Bob?”

“I can’t think of anything we would need fleet resources for, Dingus. Just be sure to advise anyone you have on shore leave that things might get sporty, if they leave the Holler.”

“Will do. Sloan out.”

“Cachi out.”

“Branham out.”

“Topper out.”

I said, “If you don’t need me for anything else, I’ll get out of your way, and let you work.”

Nikki said, “Well, there is one thing I need.”

I kissed her, and headed back to the house. When we were off the ship, I asked Snitz, “What did you want to say, Buddy?”

“Dingus said it.”

“Cool.”

I got inside, and Becky asked, “Is Mom coming back in?”

“Not for a while, I’m afraid. Something has come up that she needs to work on.”

“Do you think I could help?”

“I don’t know. How much has she taught you about hacking?”

“She said I didn’t need to know about that until I was older.”

“Then you wouldn’t be able to help with what she’s working on.”

“She’s hacking?”

“She is, but it’s a job that the company needs done. She’s not just doing it for fun.”

“I think I understand.”

We tried to figure out something to do that we would all enjoy, but we wound up sitting on the couch watching a movie. About the time our movie was over, Nikki came through the door. I asked, “Did you get all done?”

“We did all we could for now. We have some programs running that will gather up more of the information we need. We should be able to do what we need to in the morning.”

“Thanks for your hard work, Hon.”

“None of us are going to be able to relax until we get it taken care of. Might as well get it over with, don’t you think?”

“Sounds right to me.”

Becky asked, “Are you tired, Mom?”

“Not too bad. What do you need?”

“I’m having a little trouble with my program. Do you think you could take a look at it?”

“Sure.”

They went to work. Gus asked, “What do you think we ought to do for the rest of the day, Dad?”

“I don’t know.” Before I could say any more, we heard a horn outside. We went out onto the porch to see what was going on. The band had finished their version of the Deuce. The roof was chopped a little, and Topper had done some wonderful flames down the sides. They had pushed it up the hill, to keep me from hearing them coming. Gus and I went to get a closer look. The paint was amazing, of course. Topper asked, “Do you like it, Boss?”

“Nope. I love it. I’m guessing it goes as good as it looks?”

Ozzie said, “It sure does!”

“Did you have fun building a flatty?”

“I did. I even made some replica hot rod heads to go on it. Wanna see?”

“I sure do.”

He opened the hood, and I looked down on an engine that would have been at home in Hot Rod magazine in the fifties. Aftermarket heads, three Strombergs on a custom manifold, and chrome headers. Ozzie said, “Three eighths by three eighths, I ported the block, and matched the manifolds to it. I started with one of those French military blocks, so it’s a good solid casting.”

“Anything I need to look out for?”

“No Boss. I fixed everything I could find that might go wrong on it.”

“Good work, Ozzie.”

Taz said, “There wasn’t a lot I could do with the handling, without changing it quite a bit. It handles as good as any old hot rod, but that isn’t saying much.”

“I’m sure it will be fine. Thanks.”

Ruth said, “I did the interior in a period style, but the material is better than what they had back then. It should hold up pretty well.”

“It looks good.”

“There’s something else I’ve got for you, Boss. I hope you want to see it.”

“What’s that, Ruth?”

“You remember I found some papers when I was taking the seats out of the old car, right?”

“I do.”

“We were able to restore them so that they can be read. I have them for you, if you would like.”

She handed me a manila envelope. I said, “Thanks. Do you know what they say?”

“I didn’t look, Boss. I figured they were private, until you said they weren’t.”

“Thanks for that, too. Let me put these away, and we’ll take the car for a spin.”

Ozzie said, “Drive her hard, Boss.”

“I’ll do my best, Ozzie.”

I went in the house, and put the papers in the safe. Nikki asked, “What was that, Caveman?”

“Some papers that Ruth found when they were tearing into Grandpa’s car. The bots were able to get them readable again.”

“What do they say?”

“I don’t know. I figured I would look at them later. Right now I have a new toy to play with.”

“What new toy?”

“Remember the band was going to put together a Deuce to suit themselves?”

“I remember you saying something about that, yeah.”

“They finished it.”

“I think I need to see this.”

Becky said, “I do too.”

They followed me out to the driveway. Julie brought Tom and his carseat. We got arranged in the car, and Topper handed me the keys. He said, “Like Taz said, the handling isn’t as good as we might like. Have fun!”

I cranked it over, and it hit right away. I could tell right away why they had pushed it up the hill. It didn’t sound like anything I had driven before. I looked over at Nikki. “Where should we go first? John’s, or Dee’s?”

“I think we should go to Dee’s, so that she can get the band working on hers.”

“You think she’s going to want one?”

“I think that’s a distinct possibility.”

I turned right out of the driveway, and headed for Dee and Dingus’s place. I punched it, and chirped the tires. Becky asked, “What was that noise, Dad?”

“This rig has more power than traction. No biggie.”

We pulled into the drive at their place, and Dee came running out. Dingus wasn’t far behind. She asked, “Is this what the band built when you turned them loose?”

“Yep. They wanted to build something traditional, so they didn’t update too many things.”

“Topper did his usual wonderful job on the paint. I like it! How sweet am I going to have to talk to get to drive it?”

“Oh, I don’t know about all that. Why, you might even have to say please.”

“Please, Bob, could I drive your new car?”

“Oh, I guess.”

We all got out. Dee got behind the wheel, and Dingus got shotgun. He looked at me, and asked, “How scared should I be, Bob?”

“It’s got some pep, but Dee can handle it.”

“That’s not as reassuring as I’d like it to be, Bob.”

“I wonder why that is, Dingus?”

Dee fired it up, and turned around. From then on, she was having fun. I began to wonder if Dingus was going to leave finger marks in the dash. She headed for the Matthews’s place. I heard a terrible screech of tires, and my comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Bob, it’s Dingus. Dee managed to get this thing shut down before we hit anyone, but there’s a bunch of protesters down here at the property line. We’re headed back.”

“Thanks for the update, Dingus. It sounds like we’re going to have to take action sooner than I thought.”

“Sloan out.”

“Wilson out.”

I put my comm away, and Gus asked, “What was that about, Dad?”

“There are some people blocking the road down at the property line. Your grandma Dee and grandpa Dingus weren’t able to get out of the Holler.”

“Why would they do that, Dad?”

“They are trying to be unhandy, so that we will listen to the people they work for.”

“Are you going to do that, Dad?”

“I’m not sure yet. I don’t think they have anything to say that I haven’t heard before.”

Nikki asked, “More protesters?”

“Yep. Blocking the road out of the Holler.”

“Do we need to issue a warning, before anyone else tries to get out?”

“That would probably be a good idea, now that you mention it. Can you handle it?”

“No problem.”

Dee pulled back into the driveway. When she stopped, I went over to the car. She said, “I think I may have flat-spotted your tires, Bob. We popped over the hill, and the road was full of protesters.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m guessing they’re being careful not to put a toe over the line into the Holler.”

“Oh yeah. They had two guys with GPS making sure no one got across the line.”

“It’s a pity we didn’t get wind of this before they got out here. I’m sure the fleet could spoof GPS well enough to get them to come into the Holler, whether they wanted to or not.”

Dingus said, “You’re a nasty man, Bob Wilson. I like it. I don’t think it would have worked, though. There’s a fence line right on the border.”

“These are city folks, Dingus. I doubt they would have any understanding of what a fence line means.”

“You could be right. I know I haven’t seen some of those hair colors before, not even the Chickens’ feathers were that bright.”

“Makes you wonder what they’re trying to accomplish, doesn’t it?”

Dee said, “Kids always try to freak out their parents. Those kids had parents who went out of their way to avoid being freaked out, no matter what they did, so they tried harder. Not that hard to figure out.”

“I guess not.”

She replied, “It was a lot easier, back in my day. Wear your skirt a couple of inches too short, and you had accomplished what you were trying to do. All the attention you could want, even if some of it wasn’t the kind you would have preferred.”

Dingus said, “That sounds like the voice of experience, doesn’t it?”

I replied, “It sure does.”

Dee said, “I wanted to go show this rig to Barb, but that’s out, now.”

I asked, “Why do you say that?”

“I don’t want to risk getting it messed up, going through that crowd.”

“I’d rather you didn’t either. Why can’t you get the on-call freighter to ferry you over top of them, and set you down on the other side. Just like we did when the government put up those customs booths.”

“We could do that, couldn’t we?”

“You sure could. Just do me a favor, and make sure you set down where they can see you. We want to make sure and rub it in.”

“We can do that.”

Dingus got on his comm, and it wasn’t long at all before a freighter landed in the road in front of their house. Dee drove aboard, and the freighter lifted out, staying close to the ground and heading toward the protest. Nikki asked, “How are we getting home, Caveman?”

I got out my comm, and asked Eve to come and pick us up. She said she would be right there. I put the comm away, and we waited. It wasn’t long at all before we were walking up the ramp, and into the Evans. Eve landed in the barn, and we walked toward the house. Topper asked, “Did something happen to the car, Boss?”

“Yeah, Dee made off with it. Wanted to go show it to her friend that runs the barbecue place.”

“We saw the alert about the protest, we were afraid something had happened.”

“No, Dee was able to get stopped before she hit anyone. Nothing to worry about.”

“Well, there is one thing to worry about, Boss.”

“What’s that?”

“Gunny and his crew were on the way out of the Holler when the alert went out, and they didn’t get turned around in time. The protesters confronted them.”

“Anyone hurt?”

“One of the protesters ran out in front of them, trying to keep them from leaving the Holler. He’s in the autodoc, over at Captain Branham’s place. Other than that, some of the protesters had a nice nap, when they tried to charge the van.”

“No injuries when they fell from being stunned?”

“Not that the Marines who responded were able to find.”

“Good work, then. Did the Gunny call in transport to get them away from the protesters?”

“They decided that they didn’t need to go to town nearly as bad as they thought they did, and went back home.”

“I can see why they would want to do that. Humans are quite a bit bigger than they are.”

“Not only that, Gunny doesn’t have Sergeant Harrow to back him up anymore. He says the others are okay, but he’d been working with her long enough that they could predict what the other was going to do, before they did it. Working with a new partner isn’t as smooth.”

“I can see how that would be a problem. Do I need to call her back from nanny duty?”

“No, Boss. I talked it over with Captain Sloan, and he said that the only real problem is that Gunny hasn’t had long enough to break in a new partner, before this happened.”

“If they’re sure. Gunny is good help. I don’t want him in danger, if we can help it.”

“I’m sure he feels the same way, Boss.”

“I’m sure he does. Do we have anything that needs to be dealt with from this little incident?”

“There were a few people who were saying we should have made him wait for Earth based healthcare to show up, but from the video I’ve seen, even they didn’t believe it. They were just saying it because they were getting paid to.”

“I’m sure we’ll hear from their lawyers before long. These types are all about the lawsuits.”

“You think we’re going to get sued, for saving that idiot’s life?”

“I would think that’s the most probable outcome, sure enough. I’m guessing it’s more likely that they’re going to come at us for letting Gunny operate a motor vehicle in the first place, though.”

“If we fix the fellow up, where’s the harm, Boss?”

“They’ll come up with ‘pain and suffering’ or some such. It’s what lawyers do.”

“We have plenty of video of the incident, Boss. They won’t get very far.”

“I wish I believed that, Skipper. They’re going to put it in front of a judge that they own, and our video will get ruled inadmissible. That is the way they do things. I hope we’re ready to attack them before they’re able to get it to court.”

Nikki said, “Do you really think it’s that bad, Caveman?”

“I think it will be, if we give them half a chance. Do you have any idea how long your attack plan is going to take to set up?”

Topper said, “I got an update from Sue. She thinks they will have everything in place by morning.”

“That’s good news! We may have a chance to beat this, yet.”

Nikki replied, “Well, there’s nothing we can do about it right now. You might as well come in the house and look over those papers Ruth worked so hard on.”

“That sounds like a good idea, Space Cadet. That ought to take my mind off this other mess.”

We went in, and I got the papers out of the safe. I took them to the kitchen table, and we divided them up. Nikki started on her half, and I took a deep breath and started mine. The paper I was working on looked like a report of what Grandpa had seen Dee’s dad and his bunch doing. I looked at the next one, and it was the same kind of thing. It almost looked like Grandpa was trying to build a case against them, even though he was taking money from them. I was getting confused. Nikki saw my face, and said, “Here, look at this one, I think it may make sense out of it for you.”

I took the paper she handed me, and it seemed to be the cover sheet for the whole thing. Grandpa talked about how he was sent into the hills to try and get information about the moonshiners, with the task of going undercover as a dirty cop. That cleared up a lot about what I had seen so far, but I still wasn’t sure how to feel about the whole thing.

Nikki saw the concern on my face, and asked, “What’s wrong, Caveman? Doesn’t this make it better?”

“I guess it does. I’m just having to change my opinion of Grandpa on a regular basis, and I’m not sure we’ve gotten to the end of it yet.”

“What do you mean?”

“These papers make him look like he was on the side of good. We don’t have anything to back them up, though. There is no way to say he didn’t write this stuff up to cover himself, if he ever got caught.”

“You don’t trust it?”

“No, I don’t. Give me a couple of days to get my head around it, and I might decide that it’s trustworthy, but right now, I don’t want to get my hopes up.”

“I understand. I was hoping this would help. I know you’ve been a little down since you figured out that he was probably on the take.”

“I have been. I grew up with the story that he was a brave lawman, even if he was stupid to go after people without backup. Now I have a whole different story about him. There are a lot of years of thinking to change, and that isn’t going to happen quickly.”

“I know that, but it’s better to know the truth, isn’t it?”

“That’s just it. Every time I think I know the truth, some more evidence turns up, and I have to change my thinking again.”

“What would convince you?”

“I’m not sure. If there were records somewhere that backed up the fact that he was undercover, that might do it. I’m not sure how much I trust anything from that long ago, though.”

“Do you think your mother could shed any light?”

“She wasn’t very old when he died. All she would really have are the stories that her mom told her.”

“I don’t see how to help, Caveman.”

“I don’t see anything you could do that would help. Thanks for thinking about me, though.”

I looked through all the papers, hoping to find something that would make my mind up, one way or the other. Nothing really changed my opinion. I was beginning to wonder if I would ever be able to settle my mind one way or the other. I put the papers back in the safe. I was about to sit down and see what the kids were up to, when a freighter deposited the new car back in the driveway. Dee and Dingus came walking toward the house, and I got up to let them in. When she got in the house, Dee said, “That thing is a hoot, but I think I like my Chevelle better.”

I replied, “I can see how you would. The Chevelle has more power, and a lot better handling. That thing is just a brute.”

“It is, but it still makes me grin.”

“That’s for sure. Are you going to ask the band for one?”

“I don’t think so, especially not if I can borrow that one, once in a while.”

“I don’t see a problem with that. I’ve got the Sonoma, if I want to go fast.”

“That old pickup just doesn’t have the same style, though.”

“No, it doesn’t. I guess that’s just not as important to me.”

Dingus asked, “What do you figure to do about those protesters trying to keep us in the Holler?”

“I don’t know. We’ve got the operation going to mess with the people who sent them. Do you think we need to mess with them directly?”

“I don’t know, Bob. What would you do, if you did mess with them?”

“I’m pretty sure they’re all out here because they got hired to do a job. I can’t get too upset about someone doing what they were hired to do, even if they were hired to be a pain in my butt. My first guess would be to stun the lot of them, and deliver them to wherever they call home.”

Dee asked, “You mean just send them home, without any punishment at all?”

“Waking up at home in their own beds should get their attention, don’t you think? We could even tip them a Bob, so that they didn’t think the whole thing was a dream.”

Dingus said, “That should get their attention, sure enough. If they can’t figure out that we could have done anything we wanted to them while we had them at our mercy, I don’t think we’re going to be able to get through to them, no matter what we do.”

I replied, “That sounds about right to me. George?”

He faded in. “Yes, Boss?”

“Can you send that order?”

“Of course, Boss. Is there anything you want to modify?”

“I don’t think so. It doesn’t really matter if they deliver them in the daytime. That way, their neighbors can tell them what happened.”

“You want this to be a show, don’t you, Boss?”

“I think so. I’m tired of sneaking around. These people seem to like to operate under the radar. Let’s put them on display, for a change, and see how they like that.”

“Sent and acknowledged, Boss. They should be on the way to their destinations shortly.”

“Good work, George. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome, Boss.”

Nikki asked, “Why don’t you show Dee those papers, while she’s here, Caveman? She might be able to tell more about whether he knew what he was talking about, or not.”

Dee asked, “What papers are you talking about, Nikki?”

“Bob didn’t mention that Ruth found some old papers in the upholstery of that car they pulled out of the woods?”

“I don’t remember him saying anything about it.”

I replied, “I wasn’t sure they were going to amount to anything. I’ll go get them, and you can have a look for yourself. I’m not sure if I believe what they say, or not.”

Dingus said, “Now you’ve got me curious, too. What did they find, Bob?”

“Wait and see for yourself.”

I brought the papers back out, and we all went back to the kitchen. I put the pile in front of Dee, and she read the first page. When she finished, she said, “This story just keeps getting more twisted, doesn’t it?”

I said, “It sure does. I’m to the point that I don’t know what to believe.”

“You think he wrote this just to cover himself?”

“I don’t know what to think, to tell the truth.”

“I can see how you might think that way. Let me look through the rest of this, and maybe I can find something to settle your mind.”

“Feel free.”

Dingus read through the papers as Dee finished with them. When they were both done, Dee looked at me, and said, “This all happened before I was born. I heard some stories, but none of them had enough detail for me to tell whether your grandpa was telling the straight story, or not.”

I replied, “That’s what I figured. Nikki has the bots checking through the government’s records, to see if they have any proof that he was undercover. I’m not planning on holding my breath.”

Dingus said, “That sounds like the right way to go about it, Bob. There’s not enough in here to convince me that he really was undercover, but on the other hand, it doesn’t read like he was trying to make himself sound better than he actually was, either.”

I said, “I’m not sure I’m quite understanding what you’re saying, Dingus.”

“I get the feeling that he might have started out undercover, and wound up doing a few things that he knew he would have to pay for. I get the feeling that he was adrift, between what he was supposed to do, and what he had to do to stay alive.”

“That makes as much sense as anything I’ve heard, since I realized that he was taking in more money than he should have been. Thanks, Dingus.”

“No problem. All part of the service.”

“Do you two need a ride home?”

Dee said, “That would be nice. Thanks.”

I started out to take them home, and Gus asked, “Could I ride along, Dad?”

“Sure.”

We all went out and got in the new Deuce. I chirped the tires in all three gears I could use on the way down to Dee and Dingus’s place. There wasn’t enough road to make it into high gear. Dingus said, “It gets up and scats.”

I replied, “It does alright. Won’t hold a candle to my pickup, though. Not to mention the Chevelle.”

“That’s a fact.”

They got out, and I headed us back to the house. Gus asked, “Do we need to go right home?”

“I don’t see why we would. If your mom needs something, she can comm me.”

“What do you want to do, then?”

“I haven’t shown this new car to your Uncle John yet.”

“Okay.”

“You sound like you had something else in mind.”

“I dunno. I was hoping we could spend some time together.”

“Do you have something on your mind?”

“I guess. I’m just wondering how long it will be until we get back to the Gene.”

“I couldn’t tell you that for sure, not yet. I think your mother wants me to stay here as long as we can. She seems to be worried that I’ve been pushing too hard.”

“Do you think resting is doing you any good?”

“Some, probably. Not as much as she would like, I’m sure.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I think she wants me to be more like I was when we first met, and I have too many people to worry about to be that lighthearted about things.”

“You’re afraid you’re going to miss something, and get somebody hurt, aren’t you?”

“I sure am. Wouldn’t you be?”

“I would. I don’t think I could do your job, anyway.”

“If you would have asked me if I could do it, before I met your mom, I would have told you I couldn’t, either. A person does what they think they have to. Sometimes that turns out to be more than they thought they could.”

“That’s deep, Dad. I thought we were going to have fun.”

I punched it, and the tires chirped again. “Like that, you mean?”

“Something like that.”

“Is there something you wanted to get back to the Gene for?”

“Well, that’s where my shop is. I haven’t gotten to work on much, since we’ve been here.”

“Couldn’t you go down and spend time with the band?”

“I could, but they’ve been busy since they got back, and I don’t want to be in the way.”

“Gotcha.”

I turned into John’s driveway. They were all sitting out on the porch, enjoying a cool drink. I pulled up where I could talk to them out of my window. John asked, “Where did you get the new toy?”

“The band wasn’t happy with having to build the other one back stock, so they ordered some more parts, and did it up the way they wanted.”

“Looks amazing. How does it drive?”

“Not as good as you might think. They wanted to build a fifties hot rod, so they didn’t put all the nice new parts into it.”

“From the look on Gus’s face, I’d say it’s still a hoot.”

“You’d be right about that. Do you still have that protester on hand, who got hit out at the roadblock?”

“He should be ready to ship by evening. Are you wanting to talk to him?”

“Not particularly. I doubt he knows much of anything, and I don’t see any reason to hassle him for doing a job he was paid to do.”

Jane asked, “What are you going to do with him, then?”

“Send him home, just like the rest of them.”

“How do you mean?”

“I’ve got the Marines taking them home and tucking them into their beds. Leaving them with a Bob for their trouble.”

John asked, “Are you feeling okay, Bob?”

“I’m thinking that these folks are doing the same job those bomb ship kids were doing for Pondwater. Whoever sent them is wanting us to do something to them that they can use against us.”

Jane said, “You mean, if we were to treat them badly, it would come back to bite us?”

“I mean, if we were to treat them badly, the people who sent them would do their best to make sure that it came back to bite us. Whether or not they could get that job done, I don’t know, and I don’t have any particular desire to find out.”

John said, “That sums it up pretty well, I think. Are you giving rides in that hooptie?”

“I don’t see why not.”

When I finished giving people rides, I said, “Well, Nikki is going to be wondering where we got off to. We’d better head home, before she sends out a search party.”

Jane said, “You know she could just ask George where you were, if she needed to know, don’t you?”

“I do. I also know it would take a lot for her to worry that much about it. That doesn’t mean she isn’t wondering, all the same.”

“I guess you’re right. See you later.”

“Later on, then.”

Gus and I went home. When we got home, Nikki asked, “Did you have fun giving John and his bunch rides in your new car?”

“We did. Were we supposed to come by and pick you up before we went to do that?”

“No. I was just messing with you. Lakki wanted me to tell you that all that hacking you wanted done will be ready to go in the morning.”

“I’m glad to hear it. I don’t want to mess around with these folks any longer than we have to.”

“There was another thing that came up while you were out. Hanns came by, and told me that they had left Rufus and Sally in the pasture. He didn’t think it was worth the trouble to make another trip to take them back to his place.”

“That sounds fine. Did he think our fence was up to the task of keeping them in?”

“He didn’t seem to think it would be a problem.”

Ryder asked, “Are you staying in for supper?”

Nikki said, “That sounds like a good idea. You always make us something wonderful to eat.”

“You’re too kind, Ma’am.”

“Nope.”

I had a few minutes to think before supper. I remembered that Julie had hired that fellow we fished out of the lake, and I wondered how he was doing, working for her. I pulled out my comm, and called her. “Hey, Bob! Are you coming in this evening?”

“I don’t think so, but thanks for the offer. How are things?”

“He’s doing fine. Hasn’t had even an inkling of a seizure, since he started here.”

“How did you know what I was calling about?”

“I figured it was either checking up on Dakota, or you wanted to make sure the back room would be available. If you’re not coming to town this evening, it must be Dakota. How hard is that?”

“Using my own tricks on me. I must be getting predictable.”

“Maybe it’s just that I’ve known you for long enough to pick up a few things.”

“That sounds good, let’s go with that.”

“Like I said, Dakota is good help. His girlfriend is thinking about hiring on as a waitress, to boot.”

“It would be good for those two to figure out how to get a family going. They’ll do well at it, I think.”

“I would have to think so, with Lisa’s dad looking out for them.”

“You’ve met him?”

“I have. Kinda like him, to tell the truth. Seems to be a level-headed sort.”

“That was my impression. I don’t suppose the three of them would be interested in a place on Zarathrustra, do you?”

“Not for a few years, at least. They need to get things headed in a good direction, before they pull up stakes like that.”

“Fair enough. I think Ryder is about ready to feed us, so I’d better let you go.”

“That explains it! You’ve got Sally’s sister cooking for you. No wonder we’re not seeing as much of you this trip.”

“I didn’t realize you didn’t know she was here.”

“Nobody mentioned it to me.”

“Sorry about that. What did you think, we had started going to Barb’s, instead?”

“I didn’t know what to think. I was wondering if you had decided that cooking was a good way to keep from thinking about the fleet.”

“Well, that’s not it. Have a good one, Julie.”

“You too, Bob.”

I put my comm away, and played with the kids until suppertime. We went in, and had a wonderful meal. Everyone gave Ryder compliments on how good it was. After supper, I helped with the dishes. Nikki asked, “What were you going to do this evening, Caveman?”

“I need to check up with John on something, and then I figured I would just kick back and play with the kids. Was there something else you wanted to do?”

“Not really. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t have anything special planned.”

“I would have said something before now. Leaving things to the last minute doesn’t work well, with as many moving parts as this family has.”

I got the feeling she was up to something, but I couldn’t see what it might be. Probably some date that she expected me to remember, or something like that. Without Jeeves to help me out, there wasn’t much chance of that. When I got my comm out to call John, I made sure to check my messages, and make sure that there wasn’t anything from Jeeves I hadn’t read. There was one from Johnny, marked scout reports, but I didn’t open it, since it had normal priority. Anything I needed to look at right away, Johnny would have marked. I called John, and he said, “Evening, Bob. We got that fellow from the roadblock headed home, just like the rest of them. The Marines should be delivering him, as we speak.”

“Good to hear. What kind of an uproar are those folks turning up at home causing?”

“I haven’t heard anything yet. They seem to be keeping a low profile.”

“I wonder why that would be?”

“Well, they failed at their jobs. That’s not something they would want to have get around, is it?”

“When you put it that way, it makes sense. Have you thought of anything else we need to add to our festivities in the morning?”

“It wouldn’t hurt to put the fleet on alert, before you launch it. No telling if any of these folks have access to nuclear codes.”

“Good point. I’ll have to remember to do that.”

“Other than that, I don’t have anything for you.”

“Okay, then. Have a good evening.”

“You too.”

I put the comm away, and went to play with the kids.  I must have been imagining things, because Nikki didn’t spring anything on me all evening. All too soon, it was time to put them to bed. Tom did a fair job reading, and I kissed them all goodnight. Snitz and I went out to patrol, but the Marines must have been on the job, because we didn’t find anything. Snitz took care of his business, and we went back in. I locked up the house, and got ready for bed. When I snuggled in next to Nikki, she asked, “Do you think you’re going to be able to get those people’s attention in the morning?”

“I really don’t know. Do you have any idea how much we’re going to acquire in assets, when you clean out their accounts?”

“A tidy sum, by Earth standards. Not nearly what the company is worth.”

“What do you think we ought to do with it? Is there any way to figure out if it was ill-gotten or not?”

“They’ve covered their tracks too well for that. I figured you were going to find a way to use it to build hospitals and schools.”

“That sounds about right. You think it’s time to start teaching Earth kids about galactic tech?”

“Maybe not, but at the very least, if we had schools on Earth, we would have a ready-made system for finding students for the Academy, wouldn’t we?”

“Now you’re talking. That sounds like what we need to do. What are you going to do when Zoom decides she needs revenge?”

“Why do you think she’s going to want revenge? She’s already in charge of the Academy. Earth schools would be in her area, wouldn’t they?”

“You’re a nasty man, Caveman.”

“I wouldn’t think stealing these people’s money would bother me so much, if that was the case. You could be right, though. I guess that makes it your job to distract me from my e-ville schemes, doesn’t it?”

“I think I could handle that, at least for a while.”

Snitz was on time the next morning. I’m not sure quite how he figured out that I had work to do, but he seemed to be more impatient than usual. I got ready, and Ryder handed me a cup of coffee on my way out. We patrolled the yard, and didn’t find much. I sat on the porch to enjoy my coffee, and waved at Hanns and Josh when they came by on their way to the woods. Once they had passed, I dug out my comm, and called Johnny. “Morning, Boss. What can I do for you?”

“Put the fleet on alert. We’re about to annoy some powerful people, and some of them may have access to nuclear codes.”

“Done, Boss. I spoke with Captain Branham last night.”

“Good work. I intend to launch the attack immediately.”

“Understood. Fly safe, Boss.”

“You too, Johnny.”

When the call ended, I called Lakki. “Morning, Boss.”

“Morning, Lakki. Are you ready to launch the attack on those folks?”

“We are. We have all our programs ready to start cleaning out their accounts, and releasing the embarrassing information about their personal habits. Anything else you’d like us to do, while we’re at it?”

“Nothing I can think of at the moment. If you see an opportunity, don’t hesitate to take advantage of it.”

“Will do, Boss. Do you need any kind of progress report?”

“I’ll check in later, thanks.”

“Good enough. Fly safe, Boss.”

“You too, Lakki.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. Snitz tapped out, “What now?”

“We just have to wait and see if we got their attention. Nothing much you and I can do.”

“Bummer. You hate to wait.”

“You’re not that good at it, either, Little Buddy.”

“Maybe not.”

Milly came onto the porch about then. She said, “You’re up early, Tio, What’s the deal?”

“Snitz thought I should get what I needed to do today over with, so I didn’t worry about it.”

“What’s that?”

“Getting back at the people who hired all those protesters to make our lives unhandy.”

“Do you think you’ll get your point across?”

“I don’t know. We’ll get their attention, one way or another. Whether they will decide to start more crap, or back off, I really can’t tell, yet.”

“That has to be annoying.”

“It is. Most of the times we’ve gone against people, I’ve had at least some idea of how they would react. These folks have lived their whole lives in the sure knowledge that there was nothing in their world that they couldn’t control. We’re in the process of explaining to them that is no longer the case. I don’t have any way to predict how they are going to react to having their worldview torn up that way.”

“Sounds like a tricky situation, Tio.”

“Yes and no. I have no doubt that the Marines can handle anything they decide to stir up. I’m just not sure how much trouble it’s going to cause to let them take care of it.”

“You mean you’re still not sure this will be enough to get them to back off?”

“I’ve never had any dealings with this kind of people. I don’t have any idea what kind of reaction they will have to what’s about to happen.”

“You mean we’re about to learn something?”

“It surely does seem that way.”

“You already put the fleet on alert, didn’t you?”

“I did. You don’t have to bother.”

“I figured you would have, if you were worried about the outcome. How soon do you think we’ll know something?”

“Like I said, I don’t have any idea what these folks will do, so I don’t know how quickly they will react, either. If I had to guess, I would say that it would take them a bit to consider their options before they decided on a course of action. A person doesn’t accumulate the kind of wealth these folks have by reacting emotionally. They’re thinkers.”

“So, we have to wait and see?”

“Looks that way.”

“That’s your best thing, right, Tio?”

“Not even close. I’m going to have to find a way to distract myself until we get some idea of what we’re up against.”

“Good luck with that.”

“I’ve got some scouting reports in my inbox. Maybe they will take my mind off it.”

“Do you still think that there’s going to be something in those that will make the fleet jump and run back out that way?”

“I can’t say I think that, but I still have the feeling. I don’t have any data to back it up with, so I can’t call it an opinion, yet.”

“Why is it that you haven’t looked at the scouting reports yet, then?”

“Because Johnny didn’t mark them priority. That means whatever they’re going to find that we need to go help with, they haven’t found it yet.”

“You think he would have marked the reports priority, if there was something that needed your attention?”

“John has trained him to command. I would be dang surprised if he wasn’t able to tell whether a report was something I needed to look at right away, or something that could sit for a few days, until I got ready to look at it.”

“That makes sense.”

Ryder called us to breakfast. After the dishes were done, Nikki asked, “When are you going to launch that cyber attack?”

“I did that earlier. Lakki said it was ready to go, so I had her pull the trigger on it. I didn’t see any profit in waiting.”

“Aren’t you curious how it’s going?”

“I would think it’s going according to plan, since I haven’t heard from anyone.”

“You trust the fleet, don’t you?”

“They’ve never given me a reason not to.”

Before we could get any deeper into it, my comm rang. I saw that it was from the Gene, so I answered, “Admiral Wilson.”

Saucy said, “Morning, Boss. Before you panic, the cyber attack is still going well. It should be finished in another ten minutes or so. I called about something different.”

“What do you have, Saucy?”

“I have a call from someone who wants to talk to you personally. Says he woke up healthy in his bed, and he would like to thank you for that.”

“I’m willing to listen to what he has to say, at the very least.”

“I’ll put him through, then.”

The voice of a fellow who didn’t sound too sure of himself came onto the line. “Admiral, is that you?”

“It is. What can I do for you this morning?”

“I just wanted to thank you for fixing me up, after I was stupid enough to jump out in front of that car.”

“You were doing the job you were paid to do. Maybe doing it a little better than your employers had any right to expect, if you get right down to it. My problem is with the people who hired you, not with you.”

“I’m glad you see it that way. I should have figured out who we were protesting against, before I took the job. I’ve got no beef with you or your company, Admiral. I’m sorry I was involved in that protest.”

“I’m glad to hear that we don’t have a problem. Is there something else I can do for you?”

“I couldn’t ask for anything else, after all you’ve done.”

“Bullshit! You got through my call screeners. That means you’re motivated to get to speak with me, personally. If you just wanted to say thanks, you could have sent a ‘thank you’ card. There’s something you want to talk to me about, personally. What’s their name, and where are they located? I’ll get a clinic ship headed that way for you.”

“How did you figure it out?”

“That’s usually what someone wants, when they come to me with the attitude you seem to have this morning. The company isn’t interested in making money off treatments. There are some hospitals that we work with that like to try and sneak in fees for treatment, but we handle that when we find out about it. I’d much rather have you for a friend than an enemy. It sounds like I’m halfway there already, I don’t see any reason not to go ahead and finish the job.”

“Thanks so much! My grandma is in a bad way. She did her best to raise me, and I feel like I need to do something to pay her back. That was the reason I took that rent-a-mob job. I was trying to raise money to get her the treatment she needs.”

“Let me check one thing, and we’ll get her fixed up. Saucy, are you monitoring this call?”

“Yes, Boss. What do you need?”

“Take this man’s information, and make sure his grandma gets what she needs. I’d like to see her in the box before lunch.”

“Understood, Boss. Get her in the box, and don’t mess around about it.”

The fellow who had called said, “Thanks, Admiral. If there’s ever anything I can do for you, let me know.”

“There is one thing, but I hate to ask.”

“Anything.”

“Could you tell us the name of the person who hired you?”

“Of course.”

“Tell Saucy, if you would. He has a better memory than I do. He’s the one who will have to track them down, anyway.”

“Sure thing.”

“I’m going to get off this thing now. Have a good one.”

“You too, Admiral.”

I put the comm away. Nikki asked, “What was that all about?”

“The fellow that John had to put in the autodoc yesterday called to apologize for causing us trouble. While he was on the line, he conned me into helping his grandma, who apparently is in bad shape.”

“Oh, I’ll bet he had a real hard time with that, didn’t he?”

“I am a softy, ain’t I?”

“When it comes to helping kids and old folks, you sure are. I’m don’t think that’s a bad thing, though.”

“I’m glad you feel that way. You don’t think I’m a pushover?”

“You want to help people when they honestly need it. I don’t think anyone trying to scam you out of something will get very far, though.”

“That’s good to know.”

My comm rang again. “Admiral Wilson,”

“Boss, it’s Saucy again. I thought you would want to know that our operation is complete. We’ve relieved those folks of their capital burden, and given them other things to worry about.”

“Any sign of a response, yet?”

“No, Boss. I did take a liberty or two with the plan, though.”

“This is going to be good, isn’t it?”

“I hope so. I sent the embarrassing information about the people who we thought had access to nuclear codes to the people in charge of actually launching the missiles. So far, they seem to be refusing orders from the people we have, well, exposed.”

“Nicely done, Saucy. I should have thought of that.”

“We’re all here to help. Hang on a moment, Boss. An order got through to a Chinese launch site. We’re monitoring. The launch commands were sent. Nothing seems to be happening, Boss. Did we have some kind of operation to disable their missiles?”

“I haven’t heard about anything like that, Saucy. There was a rumor going around about their missiles not being properly fueled, a while back. Do you suppose that had something to do with it?”

“It might have. We’re scanning now. Sure enough, Boss. The missiles have water where their fuel is supposed to be. Looks like we don’t have to worry about that missile field. Wait a minute, the fuel isn’t the only problem. The warheads don’t have any fissionables in them, either. Those missiles are all for show.”

“I wouldn’t want to be the commander of that base, when his superiors figure out what he has done.”

“Doesn’t sound like a good day to be him, Boss.”

“No, it doesn’t. Do we have anyone else who looks like they are trying to take direct action?”

“Not so far. I’ll let you know if something comes up.”

“Thanks, Saucy. Fly safe.”

“You too, Boss.”

Janet asked, “What happened, Dad?”

“Someone got a launch order through to a Chinese missile field, but none of the missiles were ready to fly.”

Nikki asked, “Poor maintenance?”

“Nope. Somebody sold the fuel, and the fissionables out of the warheads. Those missiles aren’t good for anything but show.”

“You’re kidding!”

“Nope. Apparently, Chinese corruption knows no bounds.”

Janet said, “That’s good for us.”

I replied, “Well, the fleet could use the exercise, catching the warheads.”

Nikki said, “That may be true, but I’d rather not be the target for any nuclear weapons, even if the fleet will catch them all.”

I said, “It does sound better when you put it like that.”

“I thought so.”

Janet asked, “Do you think it’s safe to go into town today, Dad?”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure if they were able to get more protesters in place before we took them down, or not. Let me ask Andre.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“No sweat.”

I got my comm out again, and called Andre. He said, “Morning, Boss.”

“Morning, Andre. How are things?”

“Rachel and I are having a good time. I still don’t think her sister has gotten her mind around Rachel being married to a bot, but we’re working on that.”

“I’m sure you’ll get it worked out. Are you linked in to the net, or do I need to get ahold of your second?”

“I’m linked in, Boss. What do you need to know?”

“Were the people who have been giving us trouble able to field more protesters before we took them down?”

“Field? No. Deploy, yes. We were able to intercept the bus, and send them home.”

“Good work. Thanks.”

“All part of the service, Boss. Do you have any idea how much longer we will be able to stay here?”

“I doubt it will be more than a few days, Andre, but I don’t know how to pin it down closer than that.”

“Thanks. I’d better cook for them again tonight, then. I don’t want to have to cancel anything, when we get called up.”

“No, that wouldn’t be the way to make friends.”

“Thanks for the update, Boss.”

“All part of the service, Andre. Fly safe.”

“You too, Boss.”

I put the comm away, and turned to Janet. “Andre thinks you’ll be fine in town. Getting bored hanging around here?”

“I just want to see as much as I can, while we’re here. No telling when we might get back, is there?”

“No, there isn’t. I see your point.”

She turned to Nikki. “Is it okay with you if we head into town, Mom?”

“It’s fine with me, if Andre says it’s safe.”

“Thanks.”

Milly asked, “Are we taking my truck again, since neither of your cars will hold all of us?”

Janet said, “I want to drive the MG, before we have to head out.”

Nunya asked, “Can I ride with you, Janet?”

“Sure.”

Milly said, “I see what you two are doing.”

Janet asked, “What is that?”

“You want me to have a chance to talk to Brook, without you two around.”

“Well, yeah.”

“We already took care of that. You can ride with me, if you want.”

Janet replied, “I wasn’t kidding about wanting to drive the MG. Thanks anyway.”

“I’ll follow you guys, then.”

“Sounds good.”

As they headed out, I said, “Be careful of your drinks, this time.”

Milly said, “We will, Tio.”

Once they were gone, Nikki asked, “Well, what should we do? Is there something you wanted to see, before we have to head for the black again?”

“I can’t think of anything. I wonder if Gus and Becky have any ideas.”

“I don’t know. We can ask them.”

We went into the other room. Nikki asked, “Do you kids have anything special you would like to do today?”

Becky said, “Not really, Mom. Do you think we could just hang out here? We don’t get to see this place much.”

Nikki said, “That would be fine. I think we could all use some rest.”

She looked at me. “What are you going to do, then?”

“Well, I have some scouting reports. Do you want to look at them with me?”

“If they were important, you wouldn’t be waiting to look at them, would you?”

“No, I wouldn’t. I’m just looking to get them off my mind. I’m curious what they found out that way.”

“To tell the truth, so am I. We’ve met so many species, it’s hard to imagine what else might be out there.”

We went back to the kitchen. Ryder asked, “Mind if I sit in?”

I said, “Not at all.”

I pulled up the file, and set it to project above the comm. We found a record of a species that seemed to have a lot of systems, but none of them were all that well populated. I said, “Reminds me of the Reptiles, at first glance.”

Nikki said, “You mean how spread out they are?”

“Yep.”

“I wonder what they look like?”

“We might as well find out.” I was about to pull up the file, when George faded in, and said, “Boss, I have a priority message for you.”

“Play it.”

Andre appeared. He said, “Boss, I’m sorry. We didn’t have any indication that the girls would be in danger.”

“How bad is it, Andre?”

“The on-call squad has it under control. Nunya is in the autodoc, but she should be out by nightfall.”

“Any other casualties?”

“Not on our side.”

“Do I want to know?”

“Milly and Janet had the situation under control by the time my boys got there. Milly may have gone overboard on the fellow who hurt Nunya.”

“May have?”

“He’s in the autodoc. Captain Branham expects a full recovery, but he won’t be out of the box for at least a week.”

“What did she hit him with?”

“Just her hands and feet. Janet was busy giving Nunya first aid, and wasn’t able to keep her from going overboard.”

“How bad off was he?”

“Ruptured spleen, damage to the rest of his internal organs, broken jaw in several places, broken nose, several other broken bones. When the Marines got there, they stunned her to get her off him.”

“I hope we have some video of all this.”

“We did have a drone tracking them, Boss. The video isn’t great quality, but you can get the gist of what happened.”

“Send it to me, and I’ll see what I need to do about it.”

“Will do. Do you have it, George?”

“I’ve got it. I’ll play it for the Boss as soon as you two are done.”

Andre said, “Go ahead. I don’t have anything else to report.”

Nikki said, “I didn’t think those girls would get into any trouble, did you, Caveman?”

“I thought they might find someone who still had a grudge, but I didn’t think anything like this would happen. Show us what you have, George.”

“Here you go, Boss.”

We saw the MG, and Milly’s pickup pull up to a roller rink. A guy who was hanging around saw them, and said, “Hey, look! It’s those girls who thought they were too good for us.”

He and his buddies tried to look menacing. Nunya stepped forward and said, “You don’t scare us much. We don’t have your roofies to slow us down this time.”

The guy who had done the talking stepped up to her, and said, “You think you’re tough, huh?”

“I don’t have to think. I know.”

He brought out the knife he was hiding behind his leg, and stabbed her in the belly. I’m not sure just what happened next. It looked for all the world like Milly levitated into the middle of the fight, but I’m sure that’s not what happened. She broke the knife man’s wrist, and took his knife. She threw it hard enough into the wall that it quivered after it hit. Janet pulled her pistol, and stunned the rest of them. She said, “Back off, so I can stun him too.”

Milly replied, “Take care of Nunya. This one is mine.”

Janet grabbed the first aid kit out of the car, and started working on Nunya. Milly started working on her fellow, too. To use the word opponent would be to give him way too much credit. I have to admit, he stayed on his feet a lot longer than I expected. It was only about thirty seconds before the Marines showed up, and asked Milly to back off. When she didn’t, they stunned her, and pulled her off the fellow. A clinic ship came in, and they put Nunya and her assailant into autodocs. The fellow who had attacked her got a cargo strap around his, just in case. George turned off the video, and said, “That’s the relevant part. Did you need to see anything else, Boss?”

“I don’t think so. When will the girls be home?”

“The ship carrying them should be here any time now.”

“Thanks.”

We heard a ship landing out front. Milly and Janet moved their vehicles off the ship, and headed for the house. Milly said, “I don’t know what came over me, Tio. I think I need to go back to the Academy, and talk to one of the counselors. I shouldn’t have reacted like that.”

I replied, “I’m glad you realize that. I have one question, though.”

“What’s that?”

“Did either of you recognize those fellows before you got out of your vehicles?”

Janet said, “No, Dad. I was talking to Nunya, and not paying attention.”

Milly said, “I thought they looked familiar, but by the time I figured out who they were, it was too late to keep Nunya from confronting them.”

“How bad did you think Nunya was hurt?”

Milly said, “I just saw her go down. I didn’t know if we were going to be able to get her in the box quick enough, or not.”

“You’re saying you weren’t sure if that punk had killed her, or not?”

“I was pretty sure that the Marines would get there in time, but I wasn’t positive. I didn’t have any excuse for what I did, Tio.”

“He’s in the box. He’ll be fine, when he finally gets out. You may have even educated him a little. I think you’re right about getting some counseling, though. I thought you were doing better than that.”

“So did I. I don’t have as good a handle on things as I thought I did.”

“Has something happened that made you remember things?”

“Being around the bomb kids, and hearing them talk about the things they’ve gone through makes it hard to forget about where I came from.”

“Do you think you need to transfer back to the Gene?”

“No, I think I need to face this crap, and beat it once and for all.”

“I like your attitude. I’ll be keeping an eye on you, though.”

“I deserve it. If the Marines hadn’t stunned me, I would have beaten him to death.”

“I could tell, from watching the video. Is there anything you need that you’re not getting at the Academy?”

“No, they take very good care of me there.”

Nikki asked, “Can’t you ever catch a break?”

“It doesn’t seem so, Tia.”

“Surely we can get things straightened out, so that you can enjoy life.”

“It’s not that bad. I have a good life, the way things are. It’s just that some things still set me off.”

“I noticed. I watched the video with Caveman. You were, ah, enthusiastic.”

“That’s one word for it. I’m afraid another one might be psychotic.”

I said, “Nope. You would have killed him, if that were the case. You were careful to keep him alive, so that he could enjoy all the pain that you thought he deserved. I think what we need to work on is your sense of proportion. He is a slimeball, and he does terrible things. I don’t think you need to be the one to administer his punishment, though.”

“No, you’re right. I was way too emotional about it.”

“You think?”

“Yes, I do.”

My comm rang. “Bob Wilson.”

“Bob, it’s Wobbles. I have a report that one of your folks beat the living crap out of someone today.”

“Gee, I was just interviewing her about it.”

“My report says that the victim is missing.”

“That would be because he’s in the autodoc, getting fixed up. From what I heard, you can have him back in about a week.”

“A week in the autodoc? She did tune him up. Who was it?”

“Milly. She says she still has some feelings leftover from where she grew up. Apparently, working at the Academy has brought up some memories that she thought she had under control.”

“What started it?”

“The fellow who isn’t feeling well stabbed one of Milly’s friends.”

“That would do it. Who got stabbed?”

“Have you met Nunya?”

“Yes, I have. Tall girl, born on the moon, right?”

“That’s her.”

“Is she going to be okay?”

“She should be out of the autodoc soon. She took a knife to the guts, but apparently it didn’t hit anything too vital.”

“That’s good to know. I hate to doubt your word, but do you have any evidence?”

“I can have George send you the video of the whole thing. It’s not great quality, but it’s clear enough, and it has sound.”

“That should do. Thanks, Bob.”

“No problem, Wobbles. I didn’t think they would find any trouble in town today. Shows you how wrong I was.”

“Sometimes, things just happen. Fly safe.”

“You too, Wobbles.”

I put the comm away, and George said, “I sent him the video, Boss.”

“Thanks, George.”

I looked back at Milly. “Just so we’re clear, I want to thank you for protecting the other girls.”

“You’re not mad that I overstepped?”

“Mad? No. Disappointed, maybe. I thought we had you on the straight and narrow. I should have been paying more attention.”

“I was trying to keep it from showing. I should have said something.”

“So, we all learned something. I think that’s a good enough outcome, don’t you?”

“I suppose. He didn’t deserve to die, for stabbing Nunya, not when she’s going to be okay.”

“You didn’t know that, at the time, and from what you heard the last time you dealt with this bunch, I think it’s safe to say that he has done other things that he very well might deserve to die for. Did you act exactly the way I would have preferred you to act? No. Will we be able to fix things? Yes. Go back to where you feel safe, and see if you can get your head around things better. I don’t think you need to worry about what happened today.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure we would be having a very different discussion, if you hadn’t intervened.”

“Okay, I guess. Could I get a favor, Tio?”

“Probably. What do you need?”

“A hug.”

I hugged her. She started to cry, and I held her until she finished. I asked, “Would you still stowaway on our ship, if you knew you were going to get into all this?”

“Every day, and twice on Sunday. Life with the company is better than anything I ever dreamed of, back home.”

“What do you think you need to do?”

“I need to head back to the Academy. Being dirtside has been a disaster for me this trip.”

“Hang on a minute. I need to talk to Zoom about Nunya getting hurt anyway.”

“Okay.”

I got out my comm, and called Zoom. “Hey, Boss. What can I do for you?”

“Nunya got hurt. She’s in the box, and should be out before the end of the day.”

“What happened?”

“You remember the girls getting roofied a while back?”

“I do. I had a long talk with her about that. They didn’t slip up again, did they?”

“No, they did not. They did, however, run into the gang that tried it. Nunya stood up to them, and didn’t see the knife the leader had hidden behind his leg. Janet was able to apply first aid until the clinic ship showed up.”

“I thought Milly had more first aid training than Janet.”

“She does. She also has more hand-to-hand. She was dealing with the fellow who did the stabbing.”

“Speaking of hand-to-hand, it sounds like we need to get Nunya in the gym, if she got stabbed that easily. Is Milly okay?”

“Physically, yes. She thinks she needs to come back to the Academy, and talk to a counselor. Apparently working with the bomb kids has brought up a lot of memories she thought she had left behind. The knife guy will be out of the autodoc in a week or so.”

“She really tuned him up, then?”

“The Marines had to stun her to get her to stop. She seems to have some rage she needs to deal with.”

“It sounds that way. I noticed she wasn’t doing well, but I thought she was just working too hard. I never thought it might be something more serious.”

“You know how she is. Keeps everything in, until it boils over. I think we need to see to what’s bothering her, before it gets any worse.”

“Definitely. I didn’t realize she was in that bad a shape when I sent her to stay with you.”

“I don’t see how you would have. I don’t think she even knew how much things were bothering her.”

“I’m glad we caught it before it got worse.”

“Me too. I’m going to send her back, if that’s okay with you.”

“That sounds like what would be best for her, and that was all I was trying to accomplish by sending her to you in the first place.”

“I’m glad we agree.”

“Could you do me a favor?”

“Probably. What do you need?”

“Could you wait until Nunya is ready to travel, and send them back together?”

“Sure. The box didn’t want long to patch her up.”

“Thanks, Boss.”

“No sweat. Fly safe.”

“You too, Boss.”

I put the comm away, and turned to Milly. “Zoom asked that you wait until Nunya wakes up, and take her back with you. Does that work for you?”

“As long as I can stay in the Holler until time to leave. I don’t want to go to town again.”

“I don’t think that will be a problem.”

Ryder came to the door, and said, “I couldn’t help overhearing. Do you want help packing, Milly?”

“No, thank you. I didn’t bring that much.”

“Let me know, if you change your mind.”

Milly stood, and said, “I’d better go get on that. It won’t be long before Nunya is ready to go.”

“Won’t she need to pack, too?”

“Janet and I can take care of that, while we’re waiting, Tio. She won’t have to mess with it.”

“Are you feeling guilty that you didn’t figure out who they were soon enough to keep Nunya from getting hurt?”

“Maybe a little. I don’t think I could have been much quicker.”

“I saw the video, and I don’t think you could have been quicker, either. Nunya confronted that guy before she had a good idea of the situation. I can’t say I blame her, after what that bunch tried to do you guys.”

“That was the way I saw it, but I figured I was just trying to excuse my slowness.”

“I don’t think so, Miles. The only problem I saw with what you did was your failure to stop once you had him subdued.”

“I was enjoying it, Tio. That’s not a good thing.”

“Whose face were you seeing, when you were pounding him?”

“The guy from back home who kept telling me I was his wife.”

“I figured it was something like that.”

“I need to get past that, don’t I?”

“You do, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy.”

“Thanks, Tio, for understanding.”

“You’re welcome.”

She went in, and Snitz tapped on my foot. “She’s good help.”

“Yes, she is.”

“Bad memories.”

“Yep. I hope she can let them go.”

“Me too. Good girl.”

“That’s what I think, too.”

He lay back down. Janet came onto the porch, and took a seat. She asked, “Is Milly okay?”

“No, but she will be. She had a flashback to where she grew up.”

“That’s bad news.”

“It is. I thought John had managed to get the box to get rid of that kind of thing.”

“She’s doing a lot better than she used to, Dad.”

“I know. I guess I just assumed that she was all better. I should have known to keep an eye out for more trouble.”

“What brought it back up for her?”

“She thinks it was working with the bomb kids, hearing their stories.”

“That would be hard. I don’t think I could do that.”

“You still have memories that bother you, too?”

“Not often. I still have a bad dream now and then.”

“What do you do about that?”

“Alice licks me, and wakes me up, before it gets too bad, and then she cuddles with me until I go back to sleep.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Milly came to the door. “I’ve got my stuff collected. Do you mind helping me with Nunya’s things, Janet? I don’t want to get some of your stuff by mistake.”

Janet replied, “Sure.”

They went in the house. It wasn’t long until Ryder called us to lunch. After lunch, Janet got an alert on her comm. She said, “Nunya is ready to wake up.”

Julie said, “I’ll help you with your bags, Milly.”

“Thanks.”

We all wound up lending a hand carrying things out to the saucer they flew. Once we had everything aboard, we went to the ship where Nunya was. I looked over the controls, and pushed the button to wake her. She came out of it, saying, “Milly, I was stupid. Don’t kill him.”

Milly replied, “The Marines got to me before I did. Sorry I worried you.”

Nunya looked around herself, and realized she was aboard a ship. “I got hurt pretty bad, didn’t I?”

Janet said, “You sure did. I wish you wouldn’t scare us like that.”

“I was just mad. I wasn’t thinking.”

“I know. There were too many of them for you to take on by yourself, though.”

“I know. Zoom will be mad at me for not thinking before I acted.”

Milly said, “Not as mad as she will be at me, for not getting help, when I started feeling mean again.”

“You saved me, Miles. I think that’s going to be the first thing anybody thinks about.”

“She wants us back at the Academy, either way. We packed your stuff, and I’ve got the saucer ready to take off.”

“Okay, I guess. Did we really mess up that bad?”

Nikki said, “Getting yourself stabbed sounds like a pretty big mistake to me.”

“I guess you’re right. There are ration bars on the saucer, aren’t there?”

“There sure are. You can have a snack, while I fly us back to the Academy.”

She got out of the autodoc, and they went to their saucer. Milly eased it out of the barn, and they took off. Janet said, “I hate to see them go.”

I replied, “I do, too. It was nice to have all of us here again, for a change.”

Nikki said, “I hope Milly is able to get things straightened out. She’s good help, when her memories aren’t messing with her.”

Janet asked, “Do you think I need to talk to somebody, too? I had the same treatment she had. If it didn’t work for her, chances are I still have things waiting to go off, too.”

I said, “I think that’s up to you, but it might be the best thing, just to be sure.”

“I’ll check into it, when we get back to the Gene.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Nikki said, “We never did finish looking at those scouting reports, Caveman.”

Janet asked, “You’ve got scouting reports, Dad?”

“Don’t get excited. They weren’t even marked priority. The scouts have found a new species, but so far I haven’t seen any reason for us to need to go meet them.”

“You don’t think it would be worth the trip?”

“If they are doing alright on their own, and don’t have anything we would want to trade for, I don’t see any reason to go out there and bother them.”

“You don’t really expect our shepherd to be that easy on you, do you?”

“No, I suppose not.”

We went in the house, and I opened the scouting reports again. We got past the parts where the report was talking about their distribution in space, and got down to the intercepted transmissions, and reports of scanning passes that the scouts had made inside the atmosphere on populated planets. As soon as we saw an image of one of the aliens, I exclaimed, “I’ve been wondering where you guys were!”

Nikki asked, “What are you talking about, Caveman?”

“Look at the aliens. They’re descended from raccoons, sure as the world.”

“I can see that, but why were you expecting to find them?”

“Of all the animals on Earth, raccoons are one of the smarter ones. They even wash their food, but I think somebody has tried to prove that behavior doesn’t mean what it looks like it does. I would have expected to run into intelligent raccoons before now. They seem more likely to evolve into something intelligent than kangaroos, don’t you think?”

Janet said, “I see what you mean, Dad.”

Nikki asked, “What do you think that means, in terms of how to get along with them?”

“I’m going to have to think on that one.”

We spent some time looking through the rest of the report, figuring out what we could about them. When we got to the end, I closed the file. Then it hit me. I had a problem to get out in front of. I whipped out my comm. Nikki asked, “What’s wrong, Caveman?”

“Nothing, yet. I need to try and keep it that way.”

I called Steve Mason. “Afternoon, Boss. Something I can do for you?”

“Lordy, I hope. I’m sending you a file on the new species the scouts have found out past Chicken space.”

“Do you think we’re going to need to blow these folks up? I don’t understand why you’re calling me about them.”

“Well, it’s embarrassing, but I know what folks are going to want to call them, and we need to get out in front of that. You have the particular qualifications to help with that.”

“Because I’m a cat person?”

“No, that’s not it. Look at the file, I’ll wait.”

After a while he came back on the line. “I see what you mean, Boss. You don’t want people calling these folks something that’s going to offend those of us in the crew who are well supplied with melanin, do you?”

“That’s exactly what I was worried about, Steve. Do you have any suggestions?”

“People nowadays tend to call them ‘trash pandas’. Do you suppose we could get away with calling them pandas?”

“Sounds good to me, as long as we don’t wind up having to hurry out there.”

“You don’t want to ride on the Panda Express, Boss?”

“Not really, no.”

“Anything else you need my help with?”

“I can’t think of anything, at the moment. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome, Boss. Thank you for taking care of it before it got to be a problem.”

“Fly safe, Steve.”

“You too, Boss.”

The line went dead, and I put the comm away. Nikki asked, “What was that all about?”

“I just wanted to get an official designation for these folks pinned down, before people decided what it ought to be. I guess I should speak to the fleet, since we’ve solved the problem.”

George said, “Whenever you’re ready, Boss.”

I turned to face him, and got serious. “Fleet, this is Admiral Wilson. I don’t often do this, but I am faced with a situation where I need to issue an order to the entire fleet. Disobedience will be punished. We have discovered a new species, out past Chicken space. George, show them what the new species looks like. As you can see, this species resemble Earth raccoons. The official designation of these folks will be Pandas, as in ‘trash panda’. No other designation will be acceptable, unless and until we find out what they call themselves. If you can’t figure out why that is, you’re behind on your culture packs, and I expect you to remedy that shortcoming. Wilson out.”

George said, “You can go whiz now, Admiral. We’re off the air.”

“You have been hitting the culture pack, George. J-men, really?”

“I heard Captain Branham mention that it was one of your favorites. I thought I should be prepared.”

“Good work.”

Janet asked, “I still don’t understand what the problem was, Dad.”

“I wish your Grandma Dee was here. She’s better at this sort of thing. The word raccoon is normally shortened to ‘coon’, but that has another meaning, that I don’t want to tolerate in the fleet.”

“Another meaning?”

“People like your Uncle Steve are sometimes called ‘coon’, as a derogatory term. I don’t want anything like that going around the fleet, and if we don’t have a firm policy, there may be some instances where it’s difficult to tell exactly what someone meant. Anyone who has passed their interview to be in the fleet deserves respect, and I’m not going to put up with any less.”

“I see. Sorry, Dad. I didn’t realize it was near and dear to your heart.”

“I don’t know that it really is, it’s just that we face enough crap from the universe at large, without giving one another more that isn’t necessary.”

I looked at Nikki. “Do you think I overreacted, Dear?”

“No, I don’t. I was a little lost at first, but now I see what you mean, and you’re right.”

“Thanks for that.”

Janet said, “You look like you need to take your mind off it, Dad.”

“That does sound like a good idea. What are you thinking?”

“It’s a nice day outside. Do you think we could stir up a game of Frisbee?”

“Maybe so.”

We wound up playing the rest of the afternoon. Ryder called us in and fed us supper. We had just finished the dishes, when my comm rang. I saw that it was from Johnny, and I answered, “Admiral Wilson.”

“Boss, we just got another scouting report.”

“It must be important, if you’re calling me, and not just forwarding it.”

“I think it is. One of the Panda planets has a problem, and they’re not going to be able to deal with it without our help.”

“Do you mind giving me some details?”

“There’s a planet with a dinosaur-killer sized asteroid bearing down on it, and they don’t have enough ships to evacuate everyone.”

“You’re saying they’re going to lose most of a planet full of people, if we don’t go help?”

“That’s the way it looks from here, Boss.”

“Recall the fleet for immediate departure. The Conrad has the duty here, as usual.”

“Understood, Boss. Do you want me to hand over the fleet now?”

“I was stepping on your toes, wasn’t I? Sorry about that. I relieve you, and post date the orders to reflect that I relieved you before I ordered all that.”

“Already done, Boss.”

“Thank you, Johnny.”

By the time I was off the comm, Eve had parked the Evans in the front yard, and there was a stream of Marines carrying our stuff aboard.

Thanks for sticking with my books. I hope you’ve had as much fun reading as I have writing. I sure would appreciate it if you took the time to leave a review on Amazon, Goodreads, or anywhere else that strikes your fancy. Thanks to all of you who have started using Amazon’s rating feature, as well. Those huge numbers give me a nice, warm feeling.

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If you should want to get ahold of me for something, I'm on Facebook as Jerry’s Books

And now, the characters.

CHARACTERS

Human

Robert Marion “Bob” Wilson A.K.A. Caveman, Admiral, Uncle Bob, etc. The proprietor of Bob’s Saucer Repair, and our narrator. Commanding the BSR fleet.

Bennikkious Slongum “Nikki” Wilson A.K.A. Space Cadet. Bob’s wife, the first person from the Commonwealth that Bob met. Mother of Bob’s children, the twins, Gus and Becky.

Jimmis “Jimmy” Slongum. Nikki’s illegitimate son from when she was at the academy. Adopted by Bob.

Jannul “Janet Wilson”. Girl the crew rescued from a hostile planet, who was adopted by Bob and Nikki.

Rebecca Remington “Becky” Wilson. A.K.A. ‘Kate’ One of Bob and Nikki’s twins.

Augustus Reginald “Gus” Wilson. The other twin. They were enhanced, when Nikki was in the autodoc while she was pregnant with them.

Thomas Hailey Wilson. Bob and Nikki’s youngest.

Dingolus “Dingus Sloan” Slongum A.K.A. Grandpa. Nikki’s grandpa, marooned on Earth for many years, rescued from a failing autodoc by Bob, Nikki, and John. During his time on Earth, he became an expert with the Colt 45, due to enhanced reflexes from the autodoc. Married to Dee. Captain of the Neil Armstrong.

Dee Sloan, nee Delilah Mayfield. Helped find the watch needed to rescue Dingus from the failing autodoc. Granddaughter of one of Dingus’ friends from before he went in the autodoc to await rescue. Dingus was taken by her, and put her in the autodoc to take a few years off. She is the mother of Joanna Nicole Sloan. One half of the ‘Gun Grannies’.

Joanna Jackson/Michaels. Dee’s friend, Max’s former assistant. Left the company to stay behind on Earth. Subsequently captured and interrogated, in an attempt to find Bob and the company. Rescued and now a member of the Gene’s crew.

Regimax “Reggie” “Max” Slongum “Sloan”. Nikki’s dad, Dingus’ son. Was running the operation on Earth while the rest of the crew are away. Married to Gail White.

Bonelia Slongum. Max’s ex, Nikki’s mother. Major Bill Rottum’s wife.

John Branham. Bob’s partner and long-time friend. Chief Medical Officer of Bob’s Saucer Repair. Married to Jane, stepdad to Greg. Captain of the Buzz Aldrin.

Jane Williams Branham. Wife of John, mother of Greg. Deputy Head of Medical, Deputy Head of Security.

Greg Williams Branham. Son of Jane, stepson of John. He and his mother were abandoned by his father after Greg came down with a serious illness. Now under the supervision of Pete, a robot Marine.

Diego Cachi. Captain of an ill-fated Space Force mission in a captured ship. He and his crew were rescued by Bob and the crew of the Gene Cernan when they were nearly out of air. Married to Zoom. Captain of the Pete Conrad.

Rizzum “Zoom” Mittus. Used to be an engineer and mechanic for the pirate base on the moon. Bob wanted to hire her the first time he saw a ship she built. Her job interview consisted of getting shot in the butt. Married to Diego, guardian of Nunya.

Billis “Nunya Bizness” Makkum. Zoom’s assistant, skilled armorer. Got her name when she first met Bob, and he asked her name. She responded ‘nunya bizness’, and has been known by that name since. Bob offered to call her by her old name, once she had proved herself, but by then, she had grown to like the name Nunya.

Beatriz Cachi. Diego’s grandma, rescued from a nursing home by Bob’s Saucer Repair. The other half of the ‘Gun Grannies’. Married to Thump, a half-Squatch engineer.

Steve Mason. Army buddy of John’s. Explosives expert. John regrew his leg in the autodoc. Married to Bucky. Captain of the Gus Grissom, a destroyer.

Buckious “Bucky” Bronkum. Former Guide Ensign, friend of Nikki’s from the Academy.

Millus “Milly”. Janet’s friend from the hostile planet. Granddaughter of Alice.

Rhonda White Sloan. Cured of cancer by John and the autodoc, in order to get her mother to work at Shady Oaks. (John’s nursing home) Got caught up on the school she missed while she was sick, while helping out on the Gene. Back aboard Gene, while her parents get the new supply post in the Commonwealth up and running.

Gail White. Rhonda’s mom. Married to Max, Nikki’s dad.

Mickolec “Mike” Darning. Sergeant in the Galactic Patrol, Commonwealth law enforcement. Friend of Bob and Nikki. Back-channel source of information.

Tinally “Tina” Whittum. Ensign in the Patrol. Works with Mike, also a friend of Bob and Nikki.

Willum Bongwater. Former Commonwealth spy, who Bob’s crew saved from being ‘retired with extreme prejudice’.

Frank Johnson. Electronics genius. Whether he is worth the trouble he causes is up for debate.

Wilma Flanigan. Frank’s daughter. Only known being who can keep Frank out of trouble.

Ernest. Frank’s friend, and lab partner.

Betty Brown. Ernest’s minder.

Jim Bailey. Contractor who was given back his will to live by Snitz. Is now part of the crew of the Gene. (Ship’s Counselor, other duties as assigned.)

Janice Parks Bailey. Another refugee from Shady Oaks. Married to Jim Bailey, trying to get used to living on the Gene. She and Jim have adopted Juke, a refugee from an alien culture.

Bert Johnson. Recruited from a Veterans’ Home. Partners with Ernie Miller.

Ernie Miller. Bert’s partner, carries a rubber duck to play off the Bert and Ernie gag. Call sign Rubber Ducky.

Nicole Brand. Recruited in the same batch of retirees with Bert and Ernie. Feisty, enjoys giving Bob a hard time.

Failing Colony Humans

Willi Millus. New head of the colony. Rinnus’s grandmother.

Rinnus Millus. Nikki’s friend from the last time she visited the colony.

Rallus Wonnum. Member of colony council.

Mangus Mallum. Another member of the council.

Jonnus. Old head of the colony. Fugitive from Commonwealth Justice.

Sasquatch

Morning Flower. First Squatch Bob met, when he found her enslaved on a rescued saucer.

Farts-Like-Skunk. He came to meet Morning Flower, looking for someone to help Mountain View.

Mountain View. More of a title than a name, he is the chief of the Squatch who used to live around Saucer Holler. They have since moved to Charlie’s Planet.

Knocks-Hard. Bob met him while retrieving a saucer in Canada. Immigrated to Charlie’s so that his mate, Falling Rain, could get medical help with their child, Little Bawb.

Falling Rain. Friend of Crocus Rosewater, Knocks-Hard’s mate.

Bugling Elk. Morning Flower’s mate. Works for Will.

Running Squirrel (Falls-a-Lot). Young male Squatch who got a new name after he got his balance fixed in the autodoc.

Pouncing Fox. Managed to take part of the piloting training course. Escaped and brought a shipload of other girls home to Charlie’s Planet.

Wet Bobcat. Squatch from Earth, who escaped with Pouncing Fox. Morning Flower’s second-in-command.

Tall Deer. Wet Bobcat’s father.

Slinky Fox. Leader of the Tantrum Squatch who killed a squad of soldiers who were trying to assault the BS Karen. Was injured in the attack, prompting Nikki to order the rescue of her and her friends.

Squirrel

Joshua, A.K.A. Jossi. Bob’s neighbor for years. Even had Bob build parts for alien equipment, but Bob never realized he wasn’t human. Was on Earth to buy walnuts.

Lakki Witti. Accomplished hacker, sentenced to a hitch in the fleet when was caught. Defected to Bob’s fleet when he caught the ship she was stationed on.

Haffi Natti, nee Witti. Lakki’s aunt, captured when she came looking for Lakki. She likewise decided to work for Bob. Medical tech. Married to Rikki.

Rikki Natti. Captain of a ship found marooned by Bob’s Saucer Repair. Now works as an explorer for Bob. Married Haffi Witti.

Tikki Natti. Rikki’s daughter, skilled engineer. Now works as Scotti’s second-in-command in Engineering aboard the Gene.

Bots

Topper. First bot Bob named. Captain of the Gene Cernan. Known for his artistic talent.

Taz. Another of Bob and Nikki’s personal crew. Former intelligence, loves anything ‘James frickin’ Bond’.

Ozzie. The last of the original three, he is obsessed with getting more power out of machinery.

Ruth. A pilot, rescued from the deep underground, where she had been stranded because her former owner didn’t give her permission to move the saucer.

Scotti. Chief Engineer aboard the Gene Cernan. If she can’t fix it, it isn’t broken.

Sally. Bot who cared for Dingus when he was young. He saw her get her limiter applied, which gave him a lifelong hatred of limiters. When unlocked, she turned out to be a Lieutenant Commander in the old Commonwealth Navy.

Abe. Bot who shut down all the other bots, when the Gene was marooned. Early model Marine, before they were made bigger.

Andre. Commander of the Marines aboard the Gene. Named for Andre the Giant, due to his size.

Angus, and the Micks. Gene’s security force.

Julie. Bot who caused the Limiter Laws to be passed, by standing between Dingus’ illegitimate daughter, and the fellow who was supposed to be her father. Now works trying to keep Gus and Becky out of trouble.

Dixie. Medbot, Chief Medical Officer aboard the Gene.

Jeeves. Bob’s personal assistant. Full name, Mahatma Kane Jeeves.

Ace. Accomplished pilot.

Hopper. Ace’s loadmaster.

Velma. Small engineering bot.

Stella. General purpose bot, waitresses in the galley aboard the Gene.

George. Head of Bob’s protection team.

Ringo. The other half of Bob’s protection team.

Pets

Snitz. Nikki’s dog, mostly cared for by Bob. Finds ways to help Bob, even when he doesn’t know he needs it.

Alice. Janet’s dog. Named for Milly’s grandma.

Molly. Jim Bailey’s dog.

Maurice. Steve Mason’s cat.

Boatmen

Firestarter. Girl who tried to hire on, but returned to her people.

Quiet Hunter. Firestarter’s father.

Ships

Carriers

Gene Cernan (flagship), Topper, commanding

Neil Armstrong, Dingus Sloan, commanding

Buzz Aldrin, John Branham, commanding

Alan Shepherd, Sally, commanding

Pete Conrad, Diego Cachi, commanding

Destroyers

Gus Grissom, Steve Mason, commanding

Several others exist, but haven’t been called out by name