John wrote:Hey I have no idea on how to tell others that i like to be bound and tie people up. The only one that knows isn't into it at all. Any suggestions? Oh and any ideas how to to get the chance to tie up the one who isn't into it?
It depends on the kind of relationship you have with the person. If you are getting into an intimate physical relationship, then it's only natural to tell the other person what your likes and dislikes are. Bondage is one of the most widespread sexual "kinks;" there's a decent chance your partner will be interested as well. If everything is done with consent, there is no reason to be ashamed.
Of the women I've had some sort of sexual relationship with, only one had absolutely no interest in trying anything of the sort in either role, but she didn't think any less of me for my own interest. Only one who actually tried it decided she didn't like at least one of the roles - but again, she didn't think any less of me for raising the issue. I introduced three women to it who had never tried it before or even thought about it, but liked it when they did try it. Four more turned out to be already into it or at least previously interested in trying when I first raised the subject. And the foregoing do not include the ones I already knew were into it before we got involved! Not one woman has been shocked and broken things off because she found out I'm an evil pervert.
While this is not something I would do myself, I suppose one way that you could get a non-sexual friend to tie you up is to tell them you are interested in learning how to escape being tied. I expect this ruse will likely become transparent pretty quickly if you do it several times without ever escaping.
When you say the other person "isn't into it at all," does this mean the person actively dislikes the idea, or just has never tried it and is not turned on by the idea? If it's the former, I really would not push it. If it's the latter, you might be able to test the waters by asking if s/he would be willing to serve as a "practice dummy" to allow you to test techniques.
If the other person says no, I suggest that should be the end of it - go look for someone else who is more into it rather than trying to raise the subject again. If you do get consent, go slow. In fact, a useful thing both to maximize your chance of getting to do it again and just as a general tying skill would be to see how loosely you can tie the other person while still making it escape-proof. I have needed to learn this myself. I know a woman who enjoys being tied but is not very flexible and can quickly develop circulation problems. I had to experiment with ways to tie her securely yet comfortably. The poses in bondage magazines with elbows tied touching behind the back are really hot, but I personally have never found someone who is flexible enough to be tied that way even for a moment, let alone for any period of time.
It is possible that the other person will find that s/he likes it after all, at least if it's done properly. Another friend of mine is averse to the idea of being tied in large part because as a kid she was tied up in a fairly painful manner with rough rope by other kids who didn't really know any better. It might be possible to get her to try again with soft restraints. She has tried the dominant role with me (she's one of the three I mentioned above for whom I was their first tie-up partner) and she enjoyed it.
Of course, even with someone who is into being tied, you must be willing to release the other person immediately if they want out. That goes double for someone who you don't know is into it.