## Psychology behind the roles used in bondage

Post by NemesisPrime » Wed Apr 17, 2013 6:24 pm

This is very true because as a sub looking for a master I want one that will care for me and be gentle but firm when they need to be and love me not just as a slave but as a person with wants and needs and when all is said and done we can get into the same bed (Maybe with me wearing some restraints lol) and just be him and me.
Everyone speaks in multiple languages...But gag talk is universal and a sock in your mouth is the perfect translator!

### Re: Psychology behind the roles used in bondage

Post by Fesselfan » Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:39 pm

Well, the problem in discussing such things in the net is that most people discussing here have no, or very limited, real experience with the whole thing. They think that playing an online slave/master is something similar to the real thing.
As for what drives people...it's a fault to generalize there. See, I have been doing BDSM stuff now for over a decade, have met many many people. And not two of them are the same, be it what they like or what motivates them.
For me, having a submissive is owning her. Yet, I have heard no complaints so far It is a gift the submissve presents to me and shall be properly valued.
Trust is important, though, on both sides. I would never tie up a sub I dont trust.
Cheers
FF
There are 10 kind of people in the world.
Those who understand binary numeral system, and those who don't.

### Re: Psychology behind the roles used in bondage

Post by cellofello » Sun Apr 21, 2013 8:02 am

> SteveLuis wrote:I'm not into the whole pain thing or slave thing over say but I am incredibly submissive which I suppose is strange for a straight man (21). I don't think I'd particularly enjoy being chained up with pegs on my nipples and having my cock tortured etc [...]

It's not that strange. Among both men and women there are more submissives than dominants, and as far as I kmow that holds true both for straight and gay.
Sometimes you can enjoy things not for their own sake, but rather for secondary effects they produce. I do enjoy bondage for its own sake. I know people who enjoy pain (to some extent) for its own sake. I don't, but I do enjoy the feeling that I really and truly am under someone else's complete and inescapable control, and that they are doing it for their own pleasure. Their doing things to me that I don't completely enjoy for their own sake serves to produce the psychological effect that I do like.

### Re: Psychology behind the roles used in bondage

Post by Jason Toddman » Mon Apr 22, 2013 12:09 pm

I pretty much agree with what Meri20098 posted. Part of why I enjoyed experiencing bondage and degradation when I was a teenager was because of who it was that did these things to me and how they treated me overall. They were my friends, and I knew the whole time they cared about me despite the seemingly over-the-top situations they (especially my cousins) put me into (often without warning because they knew they had implied consent). They'd have never done the same things to an unwilling victim, nor would I likely have enjoyed them from people I actively disliked (say, school bullies). The friendship involved was a vital component and something I never again fully experienced in most later TUGs.
Dare to be different... and make a difference.
To boldly go where no one in their right mind has gone before...