Sniffmyfeet wrote:Communication is more important than the performance of either Dom or sub.
Agreed.
I have very little to say on this subject.
I for one, don't adhere to the concept of "performing." However, that's probably only due to me not playing the types of bondage games most guys and girls on here are used to playing. But since were talking about Doms/Tops and subs/bottoms, I figured I'd have a go at joining this discussion.
I only like to play with natural subs, meaning that during the actual bondage and/or active domination, there's no acting or "performing" involved.
Unlike putting on a costume, preparing to act out another personae or getting ready to perform theater, the games I play involve shedding away every day public "restraints" and unveiling core behavior between natural Dominant and submissive. In other words, I simply dispense with the every day courtesies and show off my inner self.
There's no performance involved. I do my thing and the sub responds in the only natural way he knows.
If he acts defiantly, I act in kind. If he acts submissively, my responses and way of going about things MAY also change, depending on my mood.
I don't act out of sorts and neither does he, 'cause when I play, it's not a role I'm putting on.
That being said, as a Dom, I'm the one who has control over whether or not the sub enjoys his experience and whether or not he will be able to look back fondly upon it. So my "role" is definitely the more important one. Of course, this DOESN'T apply to Dominant/submissive relationships, only to actual bondage and domination sessions. In a Dominant/submissive couple, both parts are as important and vital to each other.
Beyond doing as told, I have no expectations from a sub during a bondage/domination session. Initiatives can be good, but most good subs know that there's always a risk of displeasing the Dom in showing too much initiative. Initiatives can either come off as cute or as disobedient. It's always a gamble for the sub.
Then again, there are very few Doms and subs on here. Most of the active members seem to be somewhere in the middle, enjoying both ends of the rope so-to-speak, so it's of no surprise that what I wrote only applies to a small minority of tuggers on this site.