Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Fri Oct 07, 2011 11:38 am

Hi--

I don't have any stories of getting tied by a boyfriend, so I hope it's ok to ask for help in bringing it up. I want to suggest a couple ideas, but I don't want him to think that means he can do whatever he wants AFTER I'm tied up. So any thoughts would bwe great!

Thanks!

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby Amordaza » Tue Oct 11, 2011 5:17 am

To be honest, I never really had this problem (I am usually the person doing the tying and not the person being tied), so please take my suggestions with as many grains of salt as you like.

First, if you're wondering whether your boyfriend will respect your boundaries after he ties you up, then perhaps it's too early in the relationship to be considering tie up games. As you get to know him better, you may get a better idea of how much he will respect your boundaries.

Second, if/when you do start playing tie up games, just remember to take it slow. You could start by simply being blindfolded while kissing, or you could wear a gag while he tickles you (you can tell him you want the freedom to be loud without annoying the neighbors). Once you both are comfortable with that, then move on to having your hands bound.

Third, discuss your boundaries. He can't honor them if he doesn't know what they are.

Finally, remember that the person doing the tying has boundaries and comfort issues as well as the person being bound. Don't ask him to do more than what he's comfortable with.

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby AVENGER11 » Tue Oct 11, 2011 3:30 pm

Have you brought up the subject yet? do you feel he doesnt want to tie you up? I have met loads of girls who like nget off on being tied up

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Wed Oct 12, 2011 12:59 am

Thanks for the suggestions, Amordaza!

Avenger, I don't actually have a boyfriend at the moment--I wrote what i wrote before going on a date, but I don't think I'll be going out with him again. I was just wondering about bringing up tying games with a bf if he doesn't. Also, I don't really plan to bring it up on a first date, I was thinking somewhere down the line, if things work out.
Not having been tied up by a bf yet, it's something I'm really curious to try.....

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby AVENGER11 » Wed Oct 12, 2011 1:56 pm

Hello...is it bad curious on a scale of 1-10 where are you? You ll probably be surprised just how many guys ut there wil be very interested in tying u up........the guy will be more worried abt bringing up the subject probably....I knw I have been in the past....lol
Could try n bring up the subject subtlely.....talk abt maybe a role play?
Do you have any experience yet?

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Wed Oct 12, 2011 3:30 pm

AVENGER11 wrote:Hello...is it bad curious on a scale of 1-10 where are you? You ll probably be surprised just how many guys ut there wil be very interested in tying u up........the guy will be more worried abt bringing up the subject probably....I knw I have been in the past....lol
Could try n bring up the subject subtlely.....talk abt maybe a role play?
Do you have any experience yet?


I've only beemn tied up by a couple friends, which to me doesn't count. And yeah, I'm really curious about having a bf tie me. I dunno about trying a role play though, or using that as a suggestion. I might, I'll let ya know.

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby AVENGER11 » Wed Oct 12, 2011 3:45 pm

Role play can be good to break the ice................what do u want from bein tied?

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:18 pm

AVENGER11 wrote:Role play can be good to break the ice................what do u want from bein tied?



Um.....romance?

I just think it would be fun, and nice, to be tied by a boyfriend and just friends.

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby Old_Villain » Thu Oct 13, 2011 7:47 am

I think you meant and NOT just friends, lo :big:

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Thu Oct 13, 2011 12:05 pm

Old_Villain wrote:I think you meant and NOT just friends, lo :big:


Whoops....

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby AVENGER11 » Thu Oct 13, 2011 2:14 pm

You sound as if you are clear on what you want/need from the experience............which is important.............just talk to him about it n you may get a plesant surprise.......as they say...lol

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby bindKelly » Thu Oct 13, 2011 5:29 pm

AVENGER11 wrote:You sound as if you are clear on what you want/need from the experience............which is important.............just talk to him about it n you may get a plesant surprise.......as they say...lol


lol thanx Avenger

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby Old_Villain » Sat Oct 15, 2011 5:45 am

Yes, i do believe she knows what she's after....... :quirk:

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby AVENGER11 » Sat Oct 15, 2011 1:42 pm

I think you may well be right.......lol

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby MissTieMeUp » Sun Oct 16, 2011 6:08 am

Another maybe or maybe not so subtle one might be if in the early stages you invite him over for dinner/movie whatever and leave say a pair of handcuffs or rope lying on your bed or something and then see if he brings it up...if he does say you saw sometihng on TV and was wondering if it was that easy to escape from or something like that and see where it goes. if he is like whatever and shows no interest in tying you up...leave it..if he says wanna try and see? go for it! :D
Rainbow rope & a white cleeve gag are my BFF's ;)

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby SelenaGfan » Sun Oct 16, 2011 6:20 am

MissTieUup wrote:Another maybe or maybe not so subtle one might be if in the early stages you invite him over for dinner/movie whatever and leave say a pair of handcuffs or rope lying on your bed or something and then see if he brings it up...if he does say you saw sometihng on TV and was wondering if it was that easy to escape from or something like that and see where it goes. if he is like whatever and shows no interest in tying you up...leave it..if he says wanna try and see? go for it! :D


Good to see you post again Miss T..
I like you advice.

Re: Looking for suggestions

Postby SecretAgent » Sun Oct 16, 2011 7:21 am

Role-playing can be fun, but I have actually found that to be pretty hard sometimes in a "first date" or "feeling the other person out" situation. It can seem a little weird if you're not sure if the other person is into it yet. "Hey, pretend I'm a pirate and you're a French maid with a time machine..." I've usually started tie-up relationships with more "playful" tie-ups, and then sometimes it moves to role-play or whatever, depending on what you each want to try.

I like the idea about leaving handcuffs around. Or even less incriminating--just leave some rope laying on the couch. What the heck were you doing with this?

Another fun way to feel the other person out is like a funny bet or challenge. "How about I tie you up (or you tie me up, whichever), and if you can't get out, then I'll do that X for you? And if you can then, you win Y." The secret to any offer like that is to make sure that both X and Y are things you also want, or at least are willing to do. Then even though it seems like you lose, you're already OK with it! X and Y could be sexy things (I'll let you touch me, etc.) or completely unrelated (you get to choose the movie tonight).

Just ideas, have fun!
Jeff