Hi all
Geting a bit deep now, just thought i'd share my musings with like minded people.
Bit of personal history:
From a very early age I had a love of superheroes. So in my very early teens i had detailed dreams and fantasies about me as a superhero, and any females in the fantasy would take the Catwoman/Poison Ivy role, teasing and catching the hero.
Over time this developed my interest in bondage and when I was 15-16 i got my first computer in my bedroom which meant that i was free to search whatever i wanted. This started as simple "Wonder Woman in bondage" and started a heavy interest in girls tying up girls. Then at some point (probably as i shot through puberty) this developed into me wanting to be tied up, first by women, then it devleoped (possibly as i got more desperate) into also wanting to be tied up by men.
I've had a couple of bondage experiences in my life bu the main one came at the end of uni when i let a classmate tie me up in his bedroom and he spanked and tickled me. I'm not gay but being tied up was a massive turn on and he ending up giving me a hand job. I'm 25 now and that was 5 years ago.
So for many years i've had an online very submissive persona and i'm worried it's affecting how i am in general. I used to be a lot more outgoing but my self esteem at the minute isn't fantastic and i let guys at work and friends talk down to me or ignore me. I've also started to be quite pessimistic, constantly feeling pathetic and a failure.
However, i know I'm slim, good looking, funny and a genuinely nice guy so i should be feeling a lot more confident.
I don't have a girlfriend at the minute (although I know a few girls are interested i'm always either too nervous to approach them or i think it wouldn't work out long anyway) and despite a very active social life (playing football, gym etc) i do get very lonely so it makes me come online more often and play that submissive role.
My question is that the more you push an online submissive persona, the more submissive you become in your general day to day life?
End on a joke:
If quizzes are quizical, what are tests?