## Joys of depression

Post by boundntickled » Sun Nov 13, 2016 10:32 am

Many have gone through it mine just my own personal experience with it. Had it 6months and isnt getting any better and with medication and everything counselling doesnt work for me as i am just repeating myself every single timr which just annoys the hell out of me. At its worst now as my ex we were together many years yes i am 24 but were together a long time anyway she just got up and left like that and wants nothing to do with me so lost girlfriend and best friend in 1 so naturally I blame myself and feel as if I have lost a huge part of myself. Unable to just distract myself with friends because i have no friends no one likes me because i cant just shout out and make conversation easy with being shy so no one bothers with us. I go to work which i despise; have no conversation all day and then come home and just go to bed. Doing things I used to like I couldnt give a toss about anymore. Worst part of it all i have travelled alot this year but has not helped because I was meant to do all this with my ex so that has made everythinh worse and when I am asked who am i going with and say "me" it kills me as some think i confident abe to travel alone when in fact its because I have no one to ask.
Having this illness is damn right horrible especially when you have no one there for you and if i am honest I dont see it improving as nothing will fill that hole left in my heart. Been suggested online dating ha yeah so i have to pay to try and make friends because i cant make them the proper way. If i have to do that what does that say about me....hopeless, not worth knowing comes to mind and how could any woman fall in love with a failure such as me

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by xtc » Sun Nov 13, 2016 11:59 am

I'm going to leave this thread here in case any members have constructive contributions that might help.
Any trolling will not be tolerated.
Boxer shorts are cool,
but little speedos rule!
More by the same author: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=22729

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by Jason Toddman » Sun Nov 13, 2016 12:24 pm

I can relate on some level. I've always been a bit of a manic-depressive anyway but in the last few years it's been noticeably worse.
But in my case there are physical health factors that contribute. I am sixty, socially isolated, overweight (though i'm successfully dealing with that now), diabetic, and among several other problems also have severe sleep apnea that I have so far been unable to get successfully treated (though I'm going to give CPAP machines another try after a failed attempt to sleep with them last year). The sleep apnea undoubtedly contributes to a persistent case of sleepiness and being easily fatugued, and I've also lost interest in things I used to enjoy. Were it not for that my post count would be even greater than it is because I used to write (and draw) a ****ton of TUG stories. I've been taking some prozac which helps my depression but not the fatigue, and i'm getting desperate enough to try CPAPs again. But in the meantime I can relate to how you feel.
Before the Prozac I also felt like simply giving up; not suicidal but apathetic enough to neglect my health even more than I had. i've gotten over that at least and can at least enjoy simpler things like reading and watching DVDs and playing videogames. But if i want to get fully functional again i need tp deal with the sleep apnea. I'm hopeful that once that is successfully dealt with everything else will fall back into place, and I'll even be able to resume working again (I've been jobless for over two years because of sheer lack of stamina).
But at least I am sure my depression has physical causes; though perhaps aggravated by other factors such as having no social life. In my case though I'm not even interested in dating; I rather like being alone and doing whatever I want in the privacy ofmy own home. I've always been a bit insular anyway so I can deal with that better than most people. I've also considered myself a failure on many levels (and for good reason), but I don't let that define me and I manage to enjoy myself for the most part anyway whenever I'm not too tired/sleepy to even stay awake.
For you the causes and the treatments may be different, but it's never hopeless. I think there is always light to be found, if you just know where to look. Seeking support from others like us is certainly a positive step, and i hope ypou continue to talk it out and find others in real life who can also see you through this.
Dare to be different... and make a difference.
To boldly go where no one in their right mind has gone before...

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by Oohmynameisblue » Sun Nov 13, 2016 12:39 pm

I know what you mean about the friends issue. I haven't seen a friend outside of school, excluding cousins, in 3 months. I've been so secluded that we're moving house now (not because of that) but it's the main reason I want to move, even if I don't tell anyone. I also know what you mean about the ex thing, I broke up with my best friend so kind of loom like a ghost over some people in my school in a hope to make friends. Hoping I get a new start soon. You can PM me if you ever feel down.

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by bluemoon27 » Tue Nov 15, 2016 2:39 pm

I completely understand the whole depression thing, being clinically diagnosed with several different mental disorders, and it's gonna be hard. I've struggled with Manic-Depressive Disorder for almost 7 years now, and it takes time, but things start to ease a little.
Hell yeh batman. Hell yeh.

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by boundntickled » Tue Nov 22, 2016 11:59 am

Oh and to top it off i have now lost my job last day the day before Christmas ha got to love 2016 now can say everything that could go wrong has

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by Oohmynameisblue » Tue Nov 22, 2016 12:13 pm

Jesus my man you got some realy bad luck

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by drawscore » Tue Nov 22, 2016 4:16 pm

A good partner helps. Finding one will be like a gigantic weight lifted from your shoulders.
Drawscore

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by Jason Toddman » Tue Nov 22, 2016 5:24 pm

> drawscore wrote:A good partner helps. Finding one will be like a gigantic weight lifted from your shoulders.
> Drawscore

Easier said than done for some folks.
Dare to be different... and make a difference.
To boldly go where no one in their right mind has gone before...

### Re: Joys of depression

Post by Lake Lover » Tue Nov 22, 2016 9:08 pm

> boundntickled wrote:Oh and to top it off i have now lost my job last day the day before Christmas ha got to love 2016 now can say everything that could go wrong has

Get out right now and start looking for another job. Any job. I mean, you know, you have to have an income stream. And let people know you are looking now because in a month your current job is ending and you have to keep working. Most people who are looking to hire will be impressed that you are not sulking in a corner, but are being proactive and trying to better yourself.
Don't discuss your depression with your prospective employer if you can avoid it. It won't help.
Lets hope that loosing one job opens an opportunity in another job which may open social contacts and things can turn for the better for you. Be optimistic. We know its tough, but we are rooting for you.