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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Sat Sep 01, 2012 12:52 am

Back in Gold/Silver, I named a Ditto I used for breeding purpose "Sexmachine"
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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Koumei
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Post by Koumei » Sat Sep 01, 2012 3:33 am

Thanks to the very first Pokemond20 project and the writeups there, I named Cloyster "vag". We're all so mature here.
That said, in one of them I named the player character "Ah say,". If you read conversations out, it turns every NPC into Foghorn Leghorn.

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.

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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Sat Sep 01, 2012 8:04 am

Okay, I've been trying Dark Souls PVP a lot.
Turns out there's a glitch involving the camera, so you can backstab someone from the front. If you're circling someone and your camera hangs for a second, try to stab. It'll happen.
Turns out a lot of people use this glitch.
Turns out there's folks who'll run around with a summon, lure you somewhere, and have their partner sneak up behind you.
Fuckers.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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Shrapnel
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Post by Shrapnel » Sat Sep 01, 2012 1:29 pm

Does anyone know how scary Shinobi III was? No? Then look below.
Body Weapon for the win.
Last edited by Shrapnel on Sat Sep 01, 2012 1:30 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Is this wretched demi-bee
Half asleep upon my knee
Some freak from a menagerie?
No! It's Eric, the half a bee
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Darth Rabbitt
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Post by Darth Rabbitt » Sun Sep 02, 2012 1:27 am

So, I went up to an arcade in NH today, with two (quite fun) games of note I played all the way through.
One was a Sailor Moon beat 'em up (only really notable since I've never seen a US Sailor Moon game,) and the other was a rail shooter called Revolution X and was about... well, just read the plot synopsis from Wikipedia:

> Plot wrote:The plot concerns a dystopian version of 1996 where an alliance of corrupt government and corporate military forces have taken control of the world in the guise of the "New Order Nation" (NON). The NON, with their vampish commander Head Mistress Helga (portrayed by Kerri Hoskins), have declared war on youth culture (anyone aged from 13 to 30) and have banned all forms of music, television, magazines, and video games.
> The player first travels to "Club X" in Los Angeles to see Aerosmith perform live, but the band is captured by NON troops and hustled off the stage (only shown when the player reaches inside the theater). From here, the player enters the band's dressing room and watches a videotaped message from Steven Tyler before escaping the building (by shooting the mirror). Next, the player flies an NON chopper across the city in order to destroy a second, heavily armed chopper and find the band's car. The player must then destroy three key NON facilities in the Amazon jungle, the Sahara Desert, and the Pacific Rim, and collect Aerosmith wings before traveling to Wembley Stadium in London for a final confrontation with Helga, who morphs into a claymation monster who can fire machine guns and rocket launchers with its hands and feet. If the players have collected all five sets of wings by locating the members of the band, once the Helga/monster is destroyed, they become honored guests at the Aerosmith concert.

The funny thing is that I expected the Sailor Moon one to have a console version, when it's the exact opposite (Revolution X was released on multiple platforms.)
Although I wish that there was a home version of both, and that I could get both.
C'est la vie.

> Pseudo Stupidity wrote:This Applebees fucking sucks, much like all Applebees. I wanted to go to Femboy Hooters (communism).

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Ted the Flayer
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Post by Ted the Flayer » Sun Sep 02, 2012 1:43 am

Seanbaby did a review of Revolution X. I never played the arcade version, but the SNES version is bad and you should feel bad.

> Prak Anima wrote:Um, Frank, I believe you're missing the fact that the game is glorified spank material/foreplay.

> Frank Trollman wrote:I don't think that is any excuse for a game to have bad mechanics.

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Koumei
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Post by Koumei » Sun Sep 02, 2012 5:41 am

Shrapnel: that game was hard, back in the day, but a lot of fun. I seriously enjoyed Shinobi III. And Revenge of Shinobi. That is also the basis of any jokes I slipped in to various Ninja classes about wearing white and bright red and just kicking the door in, zero-stealth-mode.
Darth Rabbitt: at least a hundred years ago, Nintendo Magazine System reviewed Rev X and condemned it heavily. As for Pretty Soldier Sailor Moon, that's basically the only good Sailor Moon game that isn't an RPG.

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.

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Desdan_Mervolam
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Post by Desdan_Mervolam » Sun Sep 02, 2012 7:20 am

I never played the console version of Revolution X. The Arcade version was awesome and cheesy, done pretty much at the end of the era where you could do completely insane and nonsensical games and people would roll with it because 'LOL, Video Games".
I can't argue that a console would suck, because I loved the arcade version of Operation:Wolf (Which was much along the same lines only less bat-shit) and the console version of it was total garbage.
Don't bother trying to impress gamers. They're too busy trying to impress you to care.
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Darth Rabbitt
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Post by Darth Rabbitt » Sun Sep 02, 2012 10:49 am

Yeah, the arcade shooters of the day did not port well into home systems, and it's not surprising to imagine that Revolution X would do poorly.
There's all the more reason to go back to that arcade later, then.

> Pseudo Stupidity wrote:This Applebees fucking sucks, much like all Applebees. I wanted to go to Femboy Hooters (communism).

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Shrapnel
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Post by Shrapnel » Sun Sep 02, 2012 3:50 pm

Wait... therez no home version of the Sailor Moon game?! MADNESS! MY WORLD MEANS NOTHING!!!
WHAT AM I FIGHTING FOOOOOORRRRRR!!!??
...ahem...
Anyway.
Koumei, if you sneak in so many in-jokes about Shinobii into your ninja classes, you should also put in jokes about how every enemy explodes.
Last edited by Shrapnel on Sun Sep 02, 2012 4:02 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Is this wretched demi-bee
Half asleep upon my knee
Some freak from a menagerie?
No! It's Eric, the half a bee
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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Sun Sep 02, 2012 4:03 pm

I found out there's an Xbox 360 HD collection of Silent Hill 2 and 3 when I went into a Gamestop.
I bought it. I don't know jack about Silent Hill 3, but 2 is worth the money by itself.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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ishy
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Post by ishy » Mon Sep 03, 2012 1:18 pm

Anyone excited for Torchlight 2?
It is an action RPG and unlike D3 I actually want to play this one.
Has no closed servers, so you can play online but you can mod it all you want (though I think you can only play with people who have the same mods installed)
And it is only 20 bucks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... H_sGQRSpzo

> Gary Gygax wrote:The player’s path to role-playing mastery begins with a thorough understanding of the rules of the game

> Bigode wrote:I wouldn't normally make that blanket of a suggestion, but you seem to deserve it: scroll through the entire forum, read anything that looks interesting in term of design experience, then come back.

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Lago PARANOIA
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Post by Lago PARANOIA » Mon Sep 03, 2012 2:53 pm

Even the arcade version of Revolution X was a pile of poisoned penises. It's acceptably campy in its own pathetic way, but loaded to the brim with fake difficulty and is extremely repetitive.
I have no idea how a console port of Revolution X would've work, though. The Super Scope would have a high chance chance of running out of batteries before the game was finished (though that's more of a problem with the Super Scope) and no one is going to make a game-specific version of the machine gun for this turd. We're not talking Mario Paint or even Lord of the Rings here.

> Josh Kablack wrote:Your freedom to make rulings up on the fly is in direct conflict with my freedom to interact with an internally consistent narrative. Your freedom to run/play a game without needing to understand a complex rule system is in direct conflict with my freedom to play a character whose abilities and flaws function as I intended within that ruleset. Your freedom to add and change rules in the middle of the game is in direct conflict with my ability to understand that rules system before I decided whether or not to join your game.
> In short, your entire post is dismissive of not merely my intelligence, but my agency. And I don't mean agency as a player within one of your games, I mean my agency as a person. You do not want me to be informed when I make the fundamental decisions of deciding whether to join your game or buying your rules system.

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Ted the Flayer
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Post by Ted the Flayer » Mon Sep 03, 2012 3:15 pm

There were on-screen crosshairs that you moved around with the d-pad. It was heinous.
The only person I knew with a super scope wouldn't let anyone else use it.

> Prak Anima wrote:Um, Frank, I believe you're missing the fact that the game is glorified spank material/foreplay.

> Frank Trollman wrote:I don't think that is any excuse for a game to have bad mechanics.

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Lago PARANOIA
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Post by Lago PARANOIA » Mon Sep 03, 2012 4:13 pm

> Ted the Flayer wrote:The only person I knew with a super scope wouldn't let anyone else use it.

Dick move, but I totally understand. That bastard was a battery sink. I remember having to reload new AAs every other weekend we (as in, back when I went to other peoples' houses to play video games) wanted to play some Super Scope or Yoshi's Safari. Which we did for a few years, because despite the bazooka's horrendous design it's a fucking bazooka.

> Josh Kablack wrote:Your freedom to make rulings up on the fly is in direct conflict with my freedom to interact with an internally consistent narrative. Your freedom to run/play a game without needing to understand a complex rule system is in direct conflict with my freedom to play a character whose abilities and flaws function as I intended within that ruleset. Your freedom to add and change rules in the middle of the game is in direct conflict with my ability to understand that rules system before I decided whether or not to join your game.
> In short, your entire post is dismissive of not merely my intelligence, but my agency. And I don't mean agency as a player within one of your games, I mean my agency as a person. You do not want me to be informed when I make the fundamental decisions of deciding whether to join your game or buying your rules system.

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Darth Rabbitt
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Post by Darth Rabbitt » Mon Sep 03, 2012 4:47 pm

> Lago PARANOIA wrote:Even the arcade version of Revolution X was a pile of poisoned penises. It's acceptably campy in its own pathetic way, but loaded to the brim with fake difficulty and is extremely repetitive.

The only thing that I found repetitive was the "save the children by blowing up the bus they're in" mission, and I find it suitably hilarious to see "Since you failed, 50 children died! Try again" to not mind having to repeat it once or twice.
Also, what the fuck is "fake difficulty?"
Questions and comments aside, I admit it's only average in terms of game play for a rail shooter of the time, but Revolution X's raw cheesiness pretty much IS what the 90s was to me, for better or worse, and that's why I love it.

> Pseudo Stupidity wrote:This Applebees fucking sucks, much like all Applebees. I wanted to go to Femboy Hooters (communism).

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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Mon Sep 03, 2012 5:10 pm

Fake difficulty is making things hard to beat by including a huge element of dumb luck.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Mon Sep 03, 2012 6:38 pm

The power of Majora's Mask.
You know, this guy's right. At least in my experience. Majora's Mask holds a place in my heart. I was much more excited about it coming onto the Gamecube than I was Ocarina of Time.
It's just one of those games I remember--like Quest for Glory and Super Mario RPG. It's stuck with me, all these years.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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Lago PARANOIA
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Post by Lago PARANOIA » Mon Sep 03, 2012 6:48 pm

> Darth Rabbitt wrote:Also, what the fuck is "fake difficulty?"

Fake difficulty is difficulty that can't be overcome by skill alone. Things such as needing outside knowledge for the game (like how to do multivariable calculus for a football game), having to know ahead of time that the game is going to screw you in a certain way (like the old Sierra games), relying on a large element of luck like how an AI performs, etc..
Maybe I just suck and it HAS been awhile but I remember Revolution X having a large number of quarter-munching shots that you can't dodge. I used to be able to beat Time Crisis 2&3 and House of the Dead 2 on one credit, though, so it's not like I'm a noob when it comes to rail shooters or anything.

> Josh Kablack wrote:Your freedom to make rulings up on the fly is in direct conflict with my freedom to interact with an internally consistent narrative. Your freedom to run/play a game without needing to understand a complex rule system is in direct conflict with my freedom to play a character whose abilities and flaws function as I intended within that ruleset. Your freedom to add and change rules in the middle of the game is in direct conflict with my ability to understand that rules system before I decided whether or not to join your game.
> In short, your entire post is dismissive of not merely my intelligence, but my agency. And I don't mean agency as a player within one of your games, I mean my agency as a person. You do not want me to be informed when I make the fundamental decisions of deciding whether to join your game or buying your rules system.

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Surgo
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Post by Surgo » Mon Sep 03, 2012 8:55 pm

I liked Torchlight 1 for a while, but it did get repetitive and boring so I never finished it. A good $10 spent though. I look forward to getting Torchlight 2 and seeing if they fixed that issue.
http://www.dnd-wiki.org -- the wiki
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Blasted
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Post by Blasted » Mon Sep 03, 2012 11:00 pm

I'm intending to get torchlight 2, but borderlands 2 is coming out at the same time,
competing for my need to collect baubles.

> King Francis I's Mother said wrote:The love between the kings was not just of the beard, but of the heart

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TarkisFlux
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Post by TarkisFlux » Mon Sep 03, 2012 11:59 pm

I have a pre-purchase in for Torchlight 2, and have been looking forward to collecting on that for a while.
The wiki you should be linking to when you need a wiki link - http://www.dnd-wiki.org
Fectin: "Ant, what is best in life?"
Ant: "Ethically, a task well-completed for the good of the colony. Experientially, endorphins."
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Darth Rabbitt
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Post by Darth Rabbitt » Tue Sep 04, 2012 12:56 am

> Lago PARANOIA wrote:

> > Darth Rabbitt wrote:Also, what the fuck is "fake difficulty?"

> Fake difficulty is difficulty that can't be overcome by skill alone. Things such as needing outside knowledge for the game (like how to do multivariable calculus for a football game), having to know ahead of time that the game is going to screw you in a certain way (like the old Sierra games), relying on a large element of luck like how an AI performs, etc..

The only thing that was really like that in Revolution X is finding the band members (no idea how you're supposed to do that blind,) but that was optional anyways.

> Maybe I just suck and it HAS been awhile but I remember Revolution X having a large number of quarter-munching shots that you can't dodge. I used to be able to beat Time Crisis 2&3 and House of the Dead 2 on one credit, though, so it's not like I'm a noob when it comes to rail shooters or anything.

Time Crisis 3 is way worse than Revolution X in that regard.
Played it a couple of years ago, and it was a near-impossible quarter eater that cost me over $30, between me and another player (a friend of mine,) just to lose on (what I think was) the final battle (had I another few bucks I might have beaten it, but it would be a Pyrrhic victory.)
Revolution X cost me maybe $10 (divvied between me and the same friend that I played Time Crisis 3 with) for the whole game, tops.
I haven't improved that much at shooters in a few years (in fact, I think I've gotten worse,) so I've got to say that Revolution X is the better game in everything but graphics and weapon selection that regard unless my friend has improved dramatically.
House of the Dead 2 is about the same as Revolution X in difficulty, false or not (have played through that one countless times.)
Haven't played Time Crisis 2 because I'm still butthurt about 3, and I doubt I'll get over it any time soon.

> Pseudo Stupidity wrote:This Applebees fucking sucks, much like all Applebees. I wanted to go to Femboy Hooters (communism).

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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Tue Sep 04, 2012 4:48 am

Video Game companies as your friends.
Linked to site because it's several pictures.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Tue Sep 04, 2012 6:12 am

Question:
How many people here Dark Souls on the Xbox and they're about level 130 (could go about plus or minus ten levels either way there)?
I have an idea for a grinding loop I'd like to try out, involving three people. I can scrounge out some help, but I'd like to have at least one other reliable person involved, preferably someone used to the idea of game loops.
Idea's long, spoilered below
I spent a couple hours today being a summon in the Forest Covenant area. And this idea occured to me for soul-grinding. Lemme lay out the facts, and someone can correct me if I'm wrong:
-Slaying an invadee's summoned help gives the invader souls for the kill.
-Slaying an invader gives the invadee and summoned help souls.
-Neither a summon nor a Forest covenant invader lose humanity or souls upon being slain.
Now this is the potential hangup:
-The souls yielded in PVP are based on the souls carried by the victim, right? (Not clear on this point, but it seems to be the case. Just can't find anything to confirm it yea or nay).
If they are based on how many souls you have in your pocket, then I can see an compounded-interest grinding loop if you have three people--a host, a summon, and an cooperating invader and may run like this:
-Host opens match, enters Darkroot.
-Host finds his ally's sign, summons him.
-Enlisted invader invades.
-Invader kills summon, who throws the fight. Invader now has a much larger pool of souls in his pocket.
-The host re-summons.
-Summon or host slays the invader, who throws the fight. Both get souls from the invader kill.
-Invader re-invades.
-Repeat process. Killing the summon gives invader more souls than it did the first time, thanks to the summon having more souls.
-Occasionally throw the Covenant member slaying the host, so he can get his covenant rewards (if he needs them/wants them).
-All three have a gentleman's agreement to kill the fuck out of interlopers.
-No one levels until they've got all the souls they want.
So the idea is that with every kill, the soul rewards per kill go up, thanks to the compound interest.
But the problem is I don't -know- if the souls per kill is based upon what someone has in their pockets. If anyone would like to experiment with this and they're maybe a member of the Cat Covenant--I'll drop my current and join the Forest Covenant myself if I have to--drop me a line.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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