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Prak
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Post by Prak » Fri Jul 20, 2012 6:19 am

I know it sounds weird, but 4chan (I'm not sure what board would be best, /soc/ maybe) has gone to amazing lengths for people that are worried about their animals, and /b/ does love cats. I know the rep of 4chan, and especially /b/, but a post on there mentioning your cat's health problems may find you people willing to help. I know I would if I had money to give.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Ted the Flayer
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Post by Ted the Flayer » Fri Jul 20, 2012 4:53 pm

Knowing my luck, I would probably get identified very quickly and be attacked by hordes of people determined to crush my life and livelihood.
I know it sounds paranoid, but I have had my life crushed by people with big mouths and axes to grind, and have weathered dozens of failed attempts. There are a great many reasons I count no one as an ally.
Last edited by Ted the Flayer on Tue Jul 24, 2012 4:22 am, edited 1 time in total.

> Prak Anima wrote:Um, Frank, I believe you're missing the fact that the game is glorified spank material/foreplay.

> Frank Trollman wrote:I don't think that is any excuse for a game to have bad mechanics.

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Meikle641
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Post by Meikle641 » Mon Jul 23, 2012 12:48 am

I too would recommend 4chan. It sometimes works. I know I've given money to a person or two in need, though the one had to work for it.
Official Discord: https://discord.gg/ZUc77F7
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Prak
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Post by Prak » Mon Jul 23, 2012 2:12 am

Hey, if I had the money to give, I'd look through 4chan for people with sick/hungry animals.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Ted the Flayer
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Post by Ted the Flayer » Tue Jul 24, 2012 4:26 am

The cat is feeling much better. I'm thinking the vet was trying to scare me into buying a $600 operation. Her abscess that was about the size of her face ruptured a few days ago, and while she won't sleep on the chair she was one on account of it being covered with blood and pus, she's grooming herself, eating as normal, and not hiding all the time.
I do think she has a nasty toothache though, and there are definitely fleas in this house. Two things that will need taking care of, just not at the moment.

> Prak Anima wrote:Um, Frank, I believe you're missing the fact that the game is glorified spank material/foreplay.

> Frank Trollman wrote:I don't think that is any excuse for a game to have bad mechanics.

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Prak
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Post by Prak » Tue Jul 24, 2012 5:42 am

I'd say ask around family/friends, or just a local pet forum or the like, for a reputable vet, just so you can take her in and make sure that the problem is taken care of mostly, and so you can do something to avoid infection.
When you do get to the point where you can do something about the fleas, avoid Hartz, since apparently they put whatever the fuck they want in their stuff, and it's been known to kill animals.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Ted the Flayer
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Post by Ted the Flayer » Tue Jul 24, 2012 8:14 pm

Hartz flea medication is what started this whole thing months ago. You can be assured that I'm not touching the crap ever again.

> Prak Anima wrote:Um, Frank, I believe you're missing the fact that the game is glorified spank material/foreplay.

> Frank Trollman wrote:I don't think that is any excuse for a game to have bad mechanics.

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Starmaker
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Post by Starmaker » Sat Jul 28, 2012 2:25 pm

F-f-f-u-u-u-u-u-u-
Those fuckers who sold me my new bike forgot to tighten the screws on the luggage rack. It detached (while unloaded), spun around the wheel and smashed into the rear derailleur. I managed to stop in time to avoid breaking the rear light (it hit the ground and flew open, batteries scattering), but the transmission went wonky.
An online support dude told me to fuck off and buy a new chain. Wut.
Another offered to take the bike to a shop to have it replaced for free. Sounds good, right? BULLSHIT. It's just an online support dude. Some of them are overcautious, some overgenerous, but no one in the store is going to replace my bike just because support said so. (Also, I know from past experience their online support knows dick about the company's policies.) The most likely result of pushing for a replacement is getting told those awful scratching noises are perfectly normal.
Tomorrow, I'm cycling to the workshop-enabled store to have the bike diagnosed and hopefully repaired. The store is 20 km away from my apartment and 1.5 km away from the place where the luggage rake detached and the railway station (my destination). I had to return home on a wonky bike instead of cycling to the store right away because I didn't have the proof of purchase on me.
(I already hate that route, and I'll hate it even more when the office moves to the vicinity in the fall.)
And two days after that, luck permitting, I'll try to go on another country trip and maybe actually leave the city this time.
Good thing I don't have and don't need a car.
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Count Arioch the 28th
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Post by Count Arioch the 28th » Tue Aug 07, 2012 3:57 am

From the image thread:

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:I haven't had much time to consider dating. I've been on the run for about two months now. After I ragequit a while back I noticed the familiar stench of sour crotch sweat, pork, and envy in my apartment. I grabbed the cat and the spider and made a run for it, because she had finally found me.
> It's been an interesting time. Scrounging for food, sleeping wherever I can catch shelter. Right now I'm at an internet cafe in Peoria, although the patrons are giving me odd lucks because I am wearing a shirt that says "Go suck a barrel of cocks!" that hasn't been washed for about eight days now. Things got easier when I trained the spider to run a predator drone. Having eight legs to peck out the keys helps, also spiders don't really "sleep" as mammals and birds would call it so me and my cat can get some shuteye. The cat has shown herself to be proficient at taking out animals nearly three times her size, last night she brought home a dead corgi. Corgis taste alright, shih tzus are tastier.
> Crap, I gotta go. Tell everyone I said ba

So tired. I managed to get to Aurora before collapsing. I found an abandoned PLA Cactus Manufacturing plant to hide out it. I bolted out of the computer lab in Peoria because I had realized that the keyboard of the computer on the next table was encrusted with a sludgey mixture of syrup, cookie crumbs, and bacon-flavored sex lube. Sloppy.
The cat didn't take the trip gracefully. she has refused hunting for now. I've decided to let her sleep and gave her some of the fermented pickled herring I had been saving. Not nearly fermented enough for my liking, but the cat seems okay. The spider is drumming false mating signals on the webs of the local arachnids and devouring them when they come running. Clever girl...
This place is safe, but there's something odd. There's something humming, like machinery but from what I can tell this place has been abandoned since the mid-90's. Why is there so much foreign language in the basement? I looks like futhark, but I only recognize half the sigils.
Something is down here, but I'm too tired to investigate. Feet are screaming, head is pounding. The air is thick.
In this moment, I am Ur-phoric. Not because of any phony god’s blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my int score.
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Koumei
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Post by Koumei » Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:48 am

So... is there a way to help someone get off ice (as in meth, not the solid state of water) if they don't see that there's a problem? As in, some kind of support network you can hook them up with or something? Or is it just a matter of taking bets on how long they live, or grassing on them?

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.

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Prak
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Post by Prak » Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:52 am

Grassing?
Um, I would imagine there is probably some government funded anti-drug thing you could call up for info.
Other than that, there's always a replacement addiction... like, say, MMOs.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Chamomile
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Post by Chamomile » Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:58 am

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:-snip-

...What?
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Koumei
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Post by Koumei » Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:32 am

> Prak_Anima wrote:Grassing?

To grass on someone is to report them to the authorities.

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.

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Prak
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Post by Prak » Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:40 am

Ah, well, as I said, likely some number you can call for help, or just try to replace the addiction with something less physically harmful.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Koumei
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Post by Koumei » Wed Aug 15, 2012 8:16 am

Well of the two people, one is also addicted to cigarettes (all this while pregnant! Her baby is going to be so awesome!) so would just add any new addiction to the list (I can see WoW working: lounging around in her PJs all day is basically her main hobby anyway, add her "defrauding the government to be on the social while collecting rent from 4 houses" and you're basically looking at a living example of the conservative straw-man of what everyone on the social is apparently like).
And the other is addicted to alcohol (doctor-certified and "not getting your licence back") and cigarettes as well (so again, would just add any new addictions to the list), and is a "party girl" (hence getting dropped from Uni a month ago), so even if there was actual evidence that playing WoW is actually addictive in the medical sense, and could override other addictions, she wouldn't want to do it because it would interfere with going out drinking with friends.

> Count Arioch the 28th wrote:There is NOTHING better than lesbians. Lesbians make everything better.

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Prak
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Post by Prak » Wed Aug 15, 2012 8:33 am

Oh.
Have you considered a shock collar with a remote and constantly watching them?
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Count Arioch the 28th
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Post by Count Arioch the 28th » Fri Aug 17, 2012 2:43 am

You guys realize how hard it is to find a computer in North Dakota? Not really that hard, actually.
I'm not sure how I got here. I vaguely remember investigating some odd runes in the basement of the PLA factory I was sleeping in, remember some sort of odd light, the color of which I can't identify. I came to about three days ago in the middle of a hydrofracking facility. Me, my entire campsite, and my belongings were intact, except for a blue ribbon tied around my penis. I'm not sure I want to know...
I managed to get a job at a local diner and found an abandoned field where I can pitch a tent. And I think I'm in love with one of the servers here. Yesterday, I called her an undateable whore and asked her if she wanted to take a whack at my oversized genitals. Her body said no, but the vomit in her mouth told me I had a chance...
Either way, I've got a new fleshlight (split the last three I've ordered, I should see if they'll make an XXL version) and sewed it into my Chrysalis doll, so I'm good either way.
In this moment, I am Ur-phoric. Not because of any phony god’s blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my int score.
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erik
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Post by erik » Fri Aug 17, 2012 3:28 am

Having just driven to Montana and back from Indiana quite recently, I can vouch also that ND rest stops have open wifi! Nice.
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Prak
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Post by Prak » Fri Aug 17, 2012 5:59 am

Count, try talking to this person about a custom order.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

Top

Grek
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Post by Grek » Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:22 am

I can only assume that Ancient History has somehow gotten ahold of Count's account and is larping as him. There's no way anyone's life is actually that weird outside the Unpublishable.

> FrankTrollman wrote:I think Grek already won the thread and we should pack it in.

> Chamomile wrote:Grek is a national treasure.

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Prak
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Post by Prak » Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:25 am

I can only assume Count has decided to vaguely come back and is having fun giving a fictional account of his life while Adam Westing.
Cuz apparently I gotta break this down for you dense motherfuckers- I'm trans feminine nonbinary. My pronouns are they/them.

> Winnah wrote:No, No. 'Prak' is actually a Thri Kreen impersonating a human and roleplaying himself as a D&D character. All hail our hidden insect overlords.

> FrankTrollman wrote:In Soviet Russia, cosmic horror is the default state.
> You should gain sanity for finding out that the problems of a region are because there are fucking monsters there.

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Maxus
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Post by Maxus » Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:28 am

> Prak_Anima wrote:I can only assume Count has decided to vaguely come back and is having fun giving a fictional account of his life while Adam Westing.

That's about what I figured.
He jumps like a damned dragoon, and charges into battle fighting rather insane monsters with little more than his bare hands and rather nasty spell effects conjured up solely through knowledge and the local plantlife. He unerringly knows where his goal lies, he breathes underwater and is untroubled by space travel, seems to have no limits to his actual endurance and favors killing his enemies by driving both boots square into their skull. His agility is unmatched, and his strength legendary, able to fling about a turtle shell big enough to contain a man with enough force to barrel down a near endless path of unfortunates.
--The horror of Mario
Zak S, Zak Smith, Dndwithpornstars, Zak Sabbath. He is a terrible person and a hack at writing and art. His cultural contributions are less than Justin Bieber's, and he's a shitmuffin. Go go gadget Googlebomb!
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RobbyPants
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Post by RobbyPants » Fri Aug 17, 2012 12:31 pm

> Prak_Anima wrote:I can only assume Count has decided to vaguely come back and is having fun giving a fictional account of his life while Adam Westing.

Count Arioching? I love it. I've been enjoying reading the posts.
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Count Arioch the 28th
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Post by Count Arioch the 28th » Thu Aug 23, 2012 5:24 am

That bitch broke up with me. I decided to surprise her with a nice romantic dinner, but she's all "Who are you?" and "what are you doing in my house" and "for the love of Christ, why are you wearing my underwear?"
Jokes on her though. I pissed in her toilet and didn't flush, then I took the lid off the tank and took a crap in the top part. Bitch.
Been settling in well here. The spider and cat caught up with me. I'm a little concerned about the effects of whatever it was in the abandoned factory, because the cat has a coin embedded in her forehead, and the spider no longer pilots the drone on account of her brand new wings. I'm pretty sure spiders aren't supposed to have wings, and aren't close to anything with wings on a cladogram, so I haven't a fucking clue.
Also, had a false alarm. I overheard one of the delivery boys at the pizza place next door that someone in a local hotel ordered 15 calzones a night for the past week. I thought that unnameable horror had caught up with me, but it turns out Axl Rose was just passing through.
In this moment, I am Ur-phoric. Not because of any phony god’s blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my int score.
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...You Lost Me
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Post by ...You Lost Me » Thu Aug 23, 2012 6:31 am

I think Count is nuts...

> DSMatticus wrote:Again, look at this fucking map you moron. Take your finger and trace each country's coast, then trace its claim line. Even you - and I say that as someone who could not think less of your intelligence - should be able to tell that one of these things is not like the other.

> Kaelik wrote:I invented saying mean things about Tussock.

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